I walk behind RJ as he led the others through the hedge and into a backyard. He stood at one of the power box waved his tail in front of the movement censor, "Welcome….to suburbia."
The lights came on in different colors in the backyard and the others gasped.
RJ flicks a switch and the water sprinklers come on, the lights backing the water seem to be different colors. The others begin to explore the backyard, entranced by the many wonders of human life.
"How's that tail, Verne?" RJ asks, walking over to him with a smug look.
"Listen, if anyone in this family gets hurt, I am holding you fully responsible." Verne says, pointing in RJ's face.
"They're having a good time." RJ says, gesturing out in front of him before he begins to walk away from Verne, "I'll take responsibility for that."
I, myself, was busy looking in the reflection of the pool. Jason used to have one of these. We used to go swimming in the summer, once I had finished shedding.
"How do you like it over here, Rebekah?" RJ asks, walking up behind me.
I scoff and look over at him, "It takes a little more than some lights and water to make me go all googly eyed."
"Hm…" RJ says, a look of thought on his face, "You seem to be the type who doesn't get impressed easily."
I roll my eyes and stand up on my hind legs, "Obviously."
RJ glances over at the others before he turns back to me, "You hungry?"
"Uh…yeah sort of." I say with a shrug.
RJ immediately smiles and grabs my paw in his. "Hey everybody, this way to the food!" RJ says as he pulls me across the pool, leaping from one pool toy to another but when we get to the other side I snatch my hand back. Soon the others are right behind us.
When we all make it to the road we pass an SUV and Hammy gapes, "Oooooh, what is that?"
"That is an SUV. Humans ride around in these because they are slowly losing their ability to walk." RJ says.
"Jeepers, it's so big." Penny gasps.
"How many humans fit in there?" Lou asks as we pass it.
RJ turns to them, "Usually…one."
"Ooooh." Lou says.
"Hi! This is Gladys Sharp." A woman chirps as she steps out of a house talking on her phone, "Your president of the home owners association?"
We all dive into the bushes and stare up at her.
"Right!" The woman says again as she begins walking towards her SUV.
"Jeepers…" Penny says quietly.
"What is that?" Hammy adds.
"Easy, easy, don't worry." RJ says, calming them down, "That's just a human being. And it is just as scared of us as we are of them. Now if a human does happen to see you, just lay down, roll over, and give your privates a good licking. They love it."
I roll my eyes but kept my mouth shut.
"The home owner's charter which you signed," Gladys starts, grabbing a box from her SUV and returning to the house, "The grass is supposed to be two inches and a quarter. According to my measuring stick, your lawn is two point five." She closes the door behind her and disappears inside the house.
"Could we just get the food and go?" Verne says irritably, "Really? Do they have it or not?"
"Didn't you see it?" RJ asks, nodding behind him, his arms crossed, "It was in the box. They've always got food in them. We eat to live, and these guys live to eat. Let me show you what I'm talking about."
We dive into the bushes and then climb up to one of the windows.
RJ gestures inside at a man eating, "The human mouth is called a 'pie hole'."
We go down to one of the screen doors and RJ points to a man on the couch.
"The human is called a 'couch potato'." He says before he points at a woman talking on a cell phone, "That is a device that they use to summon food."
After a few minutes the doorbell rang, making one of the humans stand up and rush to the door.
"That is one of the many voices of food." RJ says before we circle the house to the front door.
When we get to the front door we see a pizza delivery man pass the man his pizza.
"That is the portal for the passage of food." RJ continues.
The pizza delivery guy jumps on his scooter and drives away.
"That is one of the many vehicles for the transportation of food." RJ adds, "Human's bring the food."
An eighteen wheeler drives by.
"They ship the food."
A vehicle in the shape of a taco drove by.
"They drive the food."
An ice cream truck drives by with people in ice cream costumes on the front.
"They wear the food!" RJ says.
He pulls me over to the fence that separated this yard from the once next door. The others followed us as we stared over the side of the fence.
RJ points to the BBQ next door, "That gets the food hot."
Next he points to a cooler.
"That keeps the food cold."
He points at a piñata.
"That…" RJ pauses for a moment and then puts a hand on his chin, "I'm not sure what that is…"
A kid runs over and whacks it with a stick, making candy shower out of it.
"What do you know!" RJ says, throwing his arms up, "Food!"
We climb up on top of a greenhouse and RJ points inside of a house at a family sitting down for supper.
"That is the alter where they worship food." RJ says before pulling us off the greenhouse and down to a screen door.
Inside a TV was going, featuring a commercial on TUMS.
"That's what they eat when they've eaten too much food." RJ says before pointing to the woman that was watching the TV as she ran on a treadmill, "That's what gets rid of the guilt so they can eat more food!"
We keep watching the TV that shows food commercial after food commercial.
"Food, food, food, food, food!" RJ says before turning to the others, "So you think they have enough?" Everyone nods. "Well they don't! With humans, enough is never enough!"
The others gasp as they follow RJ around the side of the house toward the back yard. He jumps up on top of three trash cans.
He turns to the others, "And do you know what they do with the stuff they don't eat? They put them in gleaming silver cans, just for us." Then RJ kicks the cans over and nods at the others, "Dig in."
They all dart for the trash and beginning digging through it for something to eat.
RJ jumps down and walks over to me as I remain in my spot behind the trash, "Impressed yet, sweetheart?"
"By garbage?" I ask with a smirk, "Not really."
RJ has a sly look on his face, "Hm…you really are a hard one to please." RJ glances at Verne, "So, what do you think? Was I right, or was I right?" RJ asks, turning to the others and they all start grinning and cheering, "And these things are just the scraps! Wait until you see what comes in the boxes and the packages and the cans! I'm telling you, folks, stick with me and in one week we will gather enough food to…to…to...to feed a bear!"
Everyone turns to him in fright.
"Just a figure of speech." RJ says quickly.
Beep Beep
The shrill sound comes from behind us and we all turn to see where the noise was coming from.
A Persian cat jumped out a cat door and stared at us in shock, "Halt! Intruders! Intruders! Get out all of you!"
Then the front door opens to reveal Gladys, the human from earlier, "What is it baby? Ah!" She screams when she sees us.
RJ and I turn to see the others laying on their backs.
"What are you doing?!" RJ asks.
Lou blinks, "Well you said we should lick our-"
"No!" RJ cuts him off, "Forget that! Run!"
We all begin booking it toward the hedge, screams coming from the others as Gladys begins racing after us, swinging a broom like a weapon.
"Get out of here!" Gladys yells, smashing the broom down, trying to hit the others, "Shoo! Get out of here!"
I yelp as she whacks me with the broom, my legs sliding out from under me as I hit the ground. My head throbs as the blurry images of the others disappear into the hedge.
Gladys runs over to see what she hit and looks down at me, her shadow looming over at me as I desperately try to stand up but my limbs wouldn't respond. "Oh god…did I kill it…?" I hear her voice above me.
When I finally muster the strength to stand up I whimper, a pain shooting up my left hind leg.
I feel her shadow over top of me and when I look out in front of me she had her broom raised over her head, "Better put it out of its misery…"
I panic and struggle to run away, stumbling with every step. Then a paw grabbed mine and I was hauled toward the hedge. The sound of the broom hitting the ground just a foot behind me. When we reached the hedge as stumbled through, sprawling out on the green grass on the other side.
My leg stung but I managed to get up and look over at RJ as he panted at my side. I blinked, "You…saved me?"
"I saw you from my tree." RJ says, nodding to the tree to our right.
"Well…thanks…I guess." I say with a shrug.
"No problem." He says with a wave of his hand and then he trots over to the base of the tree, "Goodnight."
"Wait." I say, hands on my hips.
"Hm?" RJ asks, turning to me.
"You're going to spend the night in the tree all alone?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
"That was the idea." RJ says, sending me a similar look before jumping onto the trunk and clawing his way up the base to a sturdy branch near the top.
My gaze goes from the tree to the log that I usually slept in. Then I slowly hobbled over to the tree and climbed my way up to the branch RJ was perched on. I jumped onto the branch and it shook slightly as I plopped myself down.
"What're you doing?" RJ asks, leaning against the trunk on the tree.
I lay down on my stomach on the branch and smile at him, "Thought you could use some company."
RJ gave me a weird look, "You did?"
"Plus Verne seems a bit peeved at you and I don't want to hear him jabbering on about it all night." I say with a chuckle.
RJ gives a small laugh as well and lays back, closing his eyes, "Night, Rebekah."
"Night RJ…" I say, closing my eyes and sighing as the warm night air lulled me to sleep.
(A/N: Rebekah is slowly warming up to RJ. So what do you think? Please review)