Chapter Eleven

WHAT HAVE I DONE?

When the Friends of the ABC meeting ended, Enjolras raised from his chair and went towards Joly. Molière's Malade Imaginaire* was not a company that Enjolras often seeks, but they were all family and in this case, Joly was the right person to help him. He spent the afternoon wondering about Angélique's pregnancy and about all the situations that could happen to them.

"Joly, can I have a word with you?" Enjolras asked.

The medical student seemed surprised by Enjolras's request.

"With me!?" Joly shuttered, pointing at himself.

"Yes." he confirmed "In private, please."

"I did nothing wrong!" Joly was terrified "If it is because I've sterilized all the cups in this room I did it because of the bacteria! Can you imagine all the diseases we could get for drinking from each other's cups?"

"You did what!? Fine, look, I don't care about the cups!" Enjolras sighted, trying to reassure him. "Come with me!"

Joly followed Enjolras to the left corner of the room, while Combeferre and Courfeyrac seemed surprised by this.

"So… what do you want to talk to me about?" Joly asked.

"You shall not comment this conversation I'm about to have with you with anyone." Enjolras asked "Nor will you do any questions about it."

Joly nodded in "yes".

"So… You are a medical student… What do you know about pregnancy?"

The young man looked at Enjolras with disbelief; he didn't believe he was asking him this.

"Why do you want to know about pregnancy!?"

"I said: no questions about it!" Enjolras said with seriousness "But… if you ask… A… cousin… of mine is pregnant and she's here in Paris and I want to provide her with my help… So I need to know what to do."

"I didn't know you had a cousin here in Paris!"

"I don't exactly talk that much about my family!" Enjolras rolled his eyes, impatience "Will you help me or not?"

"Fine… I will help, of course." Joly agreed "Do you want me to exam her?"

"No, no, no!" Enjolras declined "She already has a doctor! I just need your medical advices for dealing with the situation!"

"Advices!? What for?" Joly didn't understand. "If your cousin already has a doctor taking care of her, why would you bother? You seem nervous… Do you want me to exam you? You might be ill!"

"I'm not ill, Joly!" Enjolras said "Just, please, tell me... What can I do to help a pregnant woman? Is there anything I can't do near her or something?"

"Err… She must rest quite a lot… Don't make her feel anxious or nervous…" Joly begun "It's important for her not to work and to stay in a clean environment, although poor women have difficulties in arrange for that, but if she's your cousin, that mustn't be the case… Just don't make her nervous!"

"Is that the only thing I can do?" Enjolras said in disappointment.

"Well, yes!" Joly said "Once you're not the father, there is nothing else for you to do."

"And imagining if I was the father…" Enjolras said but Joly looked at him with suspicious and disgust "No! I'm not the father! Christ! I would never impregnate my cousin! But my cousin's husband is lost, as well… What can he do?"

"Well, I've never gave assistance to a pregnant woman… But I once talked to a Doctor about it and he said that when woman are pregnant they get very needy…"

"Needy for what?" Enjolras asked.

"Affection, food, attention, sleep… Generally they start getting this strange desire for one food in particular." Joly described "It is important that she rests and remains joyful during the pregnancy, otherwise, if a pregnant woman gets too anxious, she may lose the baby."

"Is that possible to happen?" Enjolras asked in concern. "Lose the baby?"

"Yes." the medical student confirmed "If the woman has health problems or if she's put under too much distress during her pregnancy."

"Thank you…" Enjolras expressed his gratitude and gave him a little pat on his back.

"Are you alright?" Bahorel asked to Enjolras "You seem a little pale…"

"I'm just tired, that's all."

"You should go for a walk." Bahorel advised "You know what they say: to err is human, but to loaf is Parisian."

"I'm not in the mode for walks." Enjolras said.

"You are never in the mode for walks!" Courfeyrac laughed.

"I think I shall go." the blonde young man said "I will finish the texts for the pamphlets at home."

"Stay a bit more and drink with us." Combeferre asked.

"No, thank you." Enjolras answered "I crave for a quiet atmosphere for writing. Well, good night, everyone…"

The blonde young man went downstairs.

"Joly!" Combeferre called.

"Yes?" the medical student run towards the second leader.

"What did Enjolras talked to you about?"

"Nothing special." Joly said "He just wanted some medical advices."

"Medical advices for what!?" Combeferre was indignant.

"I apologize but I won't tell you." Joly said "Enjolras asked me not to comment this with anyone else."

"No problem, my dear friend." the second leader nodded. "I admire your loyalty, Joly. It's good to know we have loyal comrades."

Joly shrugged his shoulders, blushing with Combeferre's complement.

Enjolras arrived to Angélique's house and knocked on the door. After five minutes of waiting, he was received by a severe Madame Loire; the old maid was looking at him, with a disapproving expression upon her face. The woman was, clearly, not amused by his presence there, as always, but tonight, she was, particularly, rigorous.

"Monsieur, do you know what time is it? It's too late for visits!" Madame Loire blocked his way. "The mademoiselle needs to rest!"

"Please… Allow me to see her." Enjolras asked. "I've promised her that I would come back today."

"It's past midnight, Monsieur." the old-woman replied "A woman in her condition must rest!"

"Let him come in, Madame Loire…" Angélique said from the top of the stairs.

"Mademoiselle, what are you doing awake at this hour of night? The Doctor said…"

"I know, exactly, what the Doctor said!" she confirmed "I'm pregnant, I'm not dying! Let him come in…"

The old maid seemed unpleased with the situation, but opened passage for Enjolras to come in and he went upstairs.

"This is a disgrace…" Madame Loire remarked between the teeth.

Angélique grab his hand and took Enjolras to her room. She closed the door and pushed him against the wall, her hungry lips kissed him, passionately, moaning against his mouth, and her hands were caressing his back and his arms. Her lips went down to his neck, while touching the skin of his chest.

"What are you doing?" Enjolras whispered.

"What do you think I'm doing?" she asked with a smile, while unbuttoning his shirt.

"Angélique… We can't do this…" Enjolras, gently, grabbed her arms, trying to make her stop.

"Why not?" she asked and stepped aside from him.

"Because you are pregnant." he answered "It can harm the baby…"

"You don't desire me, anymore?" Angélique asked with a tearful voice.

"Of course I do!" Enjolras guaranteed, caressing her face "But, like I've said, it can harm the baby… I don't want you to lose our child…"

"I won't lose our child, my love…" Angélique smiled "I can be pregnant but I still have certain needs…"

"Do you need anything? Are you hungry for something?" Enjolras asked, remembering Joly's advices.

"I'm hungry for your warmth." she whispered into his ear.

"I'm not mocking, Angélique." he said with disquiet "There is anything you really need?"

"Neither am I, Enjolras. I've already said to you what I need… I don't know why I'm feeling so… Why I'm feeling this way! I just need to have you close to me…"

"But the baby…"

"I don't think it will harm him." she interrupted him with serenity in her voice "Look at my belly… So small…"

"Don't be so stubborn, please."

"I don't know which day can be our last, that's all…" Angélique said with sadness.

"Not that conversation again… please!" Enjolras rolled his eyes.

"Yes! That conversation again!" she market out. "Your death haunts me in my sleep…"

"I'm tired of this conversation!" he shouted, interrupting her "I'm not your father!"

Angélique looked at him with tears forming in her eyes, and stepped aside, nodding her head, like she could not believe in the words she just heard.

"Leave…" she whispered.

"I apologize!" Enjolras shuttered "I was not thinking about my words. Please, forgive me…"

"Leave."

"Angélique…"

"Leave!" she cried-out "Madame Loire!"

"Please, Angélique!" he begged "I shouldn't have said that… Forgive m…"

"Madame Loire!" she screamed. "Leave me alone…"

"Angélique, please… Can we have a proper conversation?"

"Leave me alone! I don't want to look at your face!" Angélique said, pushing him away "Leave! Madame Loire!"

"You must calm down, Angélique." Enjolras recalled. "You can't feel anxious. Please, I didn't mean to upset you with my reckless words… Forgive me."

Madame Loire opened the door, with a furious expression upon her face; the old-woman was already in a nightgown, covered by a large and heavy robe.

"What is going on here?" the old woman shouted.

"Madame Loire, can you please escort this Monsieur downstairs?" Angélique asked with a serene voice, trying to hide her tearful face with her hand.

"Angélique…" Enjolras whispered.

"Come with me, Monsieur." Madame Loire grabbed his arm "It's late and the mademoiselle desires to rest."

"Please…" Enjolras said to Angélique, but she turned her back on him.

Madame Loire closed Angélique's room door and demand Enjolras to walk down the stairs.

"You've heard the mademoiselle, Monsieur." she said "Leave this house."

Enjolras nodded and took a deep breath, and went downstairs, Madame Loire followed him and closed the door, behind him. His chest was full of regret because of his impulsive behavior; he did not want to make Angélique feel anxious about the menace of his death, but the solution was even worst. Enjolras knew how much Angélique loves her deceased father but in the impulse of the situation those awful words came out of his mouth.

During the next week, Enjolras went to Angélique's house and knock on the door every single day; he screamed, he shouted, he punched the door… But no one opened the door for him. He started feeling desperate; for he wanted to know how she was doing and if the baby was alright, but he didn't receive any news from Angélique.

Saturday morning, Madame Loire, finally, opened the door for him, but the old woman, serious and severe as always, said to him:

"The mademoiselle was no wishes to see you again, Monsieur. Don't bother to come back. Have a good day. Excuse me."

"But…"

The old woman didn't allow Enjolras to finish his sentence and closed the door, leaving him breathless and in grief.

Translation (French – English) and Historical Facts:

*La Malade Imaginaire – Meaning "The Imaginary Invalid", is a 1673 three-act comédie-ballet by French playwright Molière. The play tells the story of an old man who believes he's ill but he is not. In the book, Les Misérables, Victor Hugo also uses these Theatre reference to describe Joly.

I apologize I didn't update a new chapter yesterday, but I had no time to finishing the writing of the Eleven Chapter, but here it is. Sorry for keeping you wait!

I hope you've enjoyed it and it will be continued.

Thank you so, so much for the nice reviews! You've been too kind! And for following, of course! It means a lot to me.

Thank you for the reading.