Learning to Live Again

Isilarma

Christmas

So, four months. Sorry about that. Third year is hard. I wanted to get something done for Christmas though, so I hope you all enjoy this.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"How did I let you talk me into this?"

Jack had to bite his cheek to keep from grinning. Sandy and Tooth exchanged amused looks as North clapped Bunny on the back. "Because it will be fun!"

Bunny ducked away, his face still set in a frown. "Fun? Y'know some of us have our own stuff to do."

"Why don't you think of it as practice?" Jack suggested.

Bunny's eyes narrowed. "Practice?"

"Yeah. You'll be doing it again in a couple of months; you might as well find out now if you need to go on a diet."

"A diet?"

North gave a great booming laugh. "He has a point."

"I'm not the only one who might want to consider that," Bunny muttered, with a very pointed look at North's shaking belly, but Sandy drew a picture of a sleigh next to a running bunny and North only just laughed harder. Tooth didn't even try to hide her own giggles and Jack allowed himself to relax.

Winter was always a bus period for Jack. Even before he had become a Guardian he had always felt a need to spread snow, and the feelings had only been enhanced with his new abilities. Add to that his additional responsibilities as a Guardian, and the past couple of months had been busy to say the least. He'd barely seen his fellow Guardians; occasionally he'd spot Sandy or one of Tooth's fairies, but North had been frantically preparing for Christmas, and even Bunny was starting his own preparations. With the children's faith so shaky, no one could afford any mishaps, and so no one had found the time to arrange a meeting.

As was not unusual, it had been North who had corrected that situation, and he had done so with his usual enthusiasm.

"We have to deliver all of these?"

"You deliver more eggs than this every year," Tooth pointed out.

"Yeah, but that's different."

"Aw, c'mon Bunny," said Jack. "It'll be fun." He picked up the nearest package and rattled it. "Wonder what they're getting."

North reached out and gently plucked it from his hand. "They will find out later."

Jack gave a sheepish smile. "Sorry."

North ruffled his hair fondly. "Quite all right. Just be careful. Some of these are breakable, and we don't want to upset Phil, do we?"

"Can we just get on with this?" asked Bunny plaintively. "Some of us actually feel the cold you know."

North rolled his eyes. "Where is your Christmas spirit, Bunny?"

"I'm the Easter Bunny!"

"Can we argue later?" asked Tooth. "The children are waiting." Sandy nodded emphatically, his sand spinning around his head in patterns too fast for Jack to interpret. Jack looked at North.

"So how are we going to do this?"

North clapped his hands. "I have it all planned. Sandy, you and I will take Asia. Tooth, Africa. Bunny, you can go to Australia."

Bunny's ears flicked. "I c'n do that."

"What about me?" demanded Jack. Hopefully he'd get North America; he'd be able to stop by and visit Jamie. It had been too long since he'd seen his first believer and his friends.

"You will be delivering to the children of Europe."

Jack did his best to hide his disappointment. He would still be bringing joy to children, and he could always visit Jamie afterwards. "Europe. Cool."

North's eyes twinkled and he clapped Jack on the shoulder. "Good. Then we will all meet up to do the Americas. Make it a family thing, as you say."

"That sounds like a lovely idea," said Tooth cheerfully.

"Could be worse," Bunny allowed, but Jack could see the sparkle in his bright green eyes. Sandy was practically vibrating with excitement, and Tooth was talking so fast to so many fairies that Jack didn't know how anyone could understand her. The fairies seemed happy enough though, whizzing off through the open window even as more flew in. North beamed round at them all.

"Is all sorted then. Everyone ready?"

Jack grinned at Bunny. "Bet I'm finished before you."

"What did I tell you about trying to race a bunny, mate?"

"Neither of you will beat the sleigh," North announced.

"We'll see about that."

Jack coughed. "Er, we'd better catch up." Tooth and Sandy had taken the rather more practical option of getting started. Bunny gave a muffled curse, then grabbed his sack and opened a tunnel. North tossed Jack a snow globe.

"Good luck."

Jack had been slightly wary when Jack proposed the idea. He was far more used to bringing snow than actually visiting homes. Sure he had helped Tooth with the teeth, but that had been just a regular thing. This was Christmas. If Jack screwed this up the way he had Easter...

No. That was not going to happen. It was just delivering a few presents. Easy.

And, to his surprise, it was. Jack would enter each house, slip the right present into the stockings and disappear again. Occasionally he would add a few decorations, frosted patterns here, ice sculptures there, but he kept moving. After all, there were lots of children in the world, and only a few hours in the night.

"Told you I'd win."

Jack pulled a face. "I had more kids to visit."

"You keep telling yourself that," Bunny drawled.

North coughed loudly. "We argue later. Now, we have a schedule to keep."

With an effort, Jack pulled his attention back to the present. "You know I can't really do South America, right? The whole heat thing-"

"Yes, yes, I know. Bunny and Tooth will handle that part."

"Great. So I was thinking I could maybe-"

"You will take Canada and Alaska, yes?" North interrupted. "Plenty cold for you there."

Jack stared at him, this time unable to hide his dismay. "But what about-"

"Then it is all settled," said North loudly. "Now we had best be on our way."

Jack opened his mouth to protest, but there was a sudden rush of portals and tunnels and then he was standing alone in workshop.

For a long moment, Jack couldn't move. All the joy of the past few hours had completely disappeared, leaving an emptiness that was all the worse for it. In the months since Pitch's defeat he had begun to think that he belonged with the Guardians, that maybe he had finally found somewhere he belonged, and people who accepted him for who he was.

Would he ever be that lucky?

Jack's hands curled into fists as anger surged up in him. All he wanted to do was visit his friends at Christmas, and yet that was the one thing he couldn't do. They didn't even have the excuse of ignorance; he had spent most of the earlier meeting telling everyone who would listen just what would make his perfect Christmas. The Bennetts had been at the top of the list, and his so-called friends had done this.

He never should have thought he could trust them.

Jack took a deep breath and forced his anger to one side. This wasn't the time to get angry. As upset as he was, the last thing he wanted was a whole bunch of upset kids. He could wait until later to tell the rest of the Guardians exactly what he thought of them.

Jack set about delivering the presents, but this time he couldn't take any pleasure. Try as he might, he couldn't stop his mind drifting to his fellow Guardians. He didn't leave any extra decorations.

A few hours later Jack dropped off the last of the presents and paused to think. He could go home, but if there were any presents North had forgotten he had better make sure they got delivered. No need for anyone else to be disappointed today. He spotted a string of dream sand and leapt into the winds.

"What kept you?" drawled Bunny as Jack landed.

"All done," he muttered. "Can I go now?" He'd wait until the morning to start shouting. It would give him time to think up some decent insults.

"Actually," said North, "there's a few more to go."

Jack frowned. "Well you can handle those, right? Some of us have jobs that don't end in one night."

North's eyes twinkled as he held out a bag. "Why don't you take a look first?"

Jack was incredibly tempted to refuse. To throw the bag down and tell them to go stuff themselves. But this wasn't about them. This was about the kids. He sighed and took the bag. "Why me?"

"Just open the bag so we can all get on with this," called Bunny.

Jack shot him a glare but the retort died on his lips as he saw the first label. "Cupcake." He looked up to find North beaming at him.

"Keep going."

Jack dug back into the bag. "Monty," he read. "Pippa, Claude, Caleb..." His voice cracked as he drew out the last two. "Sophie and Jamie."

Bunny ruffled his hair. "You didn't really think we wouldn't let you see them, did ya?"

Jack didn't speak. He couldn't. He stared round at his friends, North with his beaming smile, Tooth buzzing happily in midair, Sandy's sand a blazing halo around his head, and Bunny watching him with unveiled amusement. "Thank you," he whispered.

Bunny grinned and pulled him into a hug. "Merry Christmas, Jack."

And for once it was.

Merry Christmas everyone!