Chapter 4: You Should Never give a Child- Especially a Micronations - Alcohol

"Alcohol gives you infinite patience for stupidity." Sammy Davis, JR

PRUSSIA AND the rest of the nations after the end of the week were all hanging around their local bar down the street, drinking beer and enjoying their time after a long day's work.

If you considered bickering and being lazy as a "long day's work."

Prussia loved Friday since it was the final day and Saturday will come to bless the Prussian man with extended hours of sleep, and this time he wanted to get rock hard drunk for the occasion.

And he really meant hard rock drunk.

He was going for the longest record of chugging beer in one night, his most was forty-five in one night.

But we all knew that because he's Awesome Prussia.

Russia, his rival, who sat down with the three shivering Baltics with his crybaby sister Ukraine and his super creepy staking sister Belarus were staring at him, knowing tonight was special. He eyed him pretty coldly, since he was enemies with that guy for over centuries, he wrote terrible things about him, and all of them were true!

Well it was!

Prussia stayed at his spot and continuously glared dark glares at Russia until he felt a suddenly tug behind his uniform shirt. He looked over his shoulder with a grunt of unhappiness, who would dare interpret the awesome Prussia at his drinking hours?

Apparently, it was a cute little mirconation who called herself Sealand.

"What do you want?" Prussia slurred, feeling the alcohol kicking in.

"What's that you're drinking?" Sealand asked innocently, pointing at his half empty beer mug.

Prussia's red eyes widen in horror. "Oh mein Gott, kind! Prussia yelped for once. "You never had beer before-HIC-? You are so-HIC-innocent and so-HIC-clueless!" Prussia's arms got up in the air and started waving them hysterically. "Bartender, give me two beers on the double!"

The bartender gave a simply nod with a smile, getting two large beer mugs and filling them with delicious beer. When Sealand got up on the stool (which was difficult, don't blame her shortness) and looked at the beer mug which overflowed foam from the side, she basked at its glory and knew it was humongous, and too heavy once she tried to lift the handle.

"Oooh…" awed Sealand as a tiny piece of foam dripped from the side glass mug.

Prussia took his first swig of his third beer and sighed loudly in relief, leaving a foam moustache on his upper lip.

Sealand got up in her toes on the stool, trying to get high enough to let her lips touch the edge. When Sealand finally got her lips to touch the mug's edge and took her first sip, she realized how disgusting the taste was and spat it out in disgust.

Prussia grunted at her with a pissed look. "Sealand, you're not doing it right. You have to take a bigger swig-HIC-and then gulp it really loudly! You won't-HIC-be a real nation if you-HIC-don't drink like grownups! Look at Latvia; he's drinking vodka right-HIC-now!" Prussia pointed at Latvia and Sealand looked over.

She saw Russia, hugging Latvia, and forcing him to gulp cup after cup of vodka in his mouth while smiling childishly.

Sealand took her blue eyes on the mug again, feeling unsure again...

But she did want to become a nation, so this must be the ultimate key to becoming a nation, right? So when she concentrated on her tiny hands that took the mug handle and with one swift lift forward started chugging the beer down her throat.

Surprisingly, it wasn't bad the second time she drank it!

"Gute Arbeit, Sealand!" Prussia congratulated her in German and gave her a slap on the back very hard, almost tipping her off her chair until she jumped on it on her butt.

Then they heard multiple footsteps coming from behind, Sealand and Prussia turned their heads to see the smiling Russian and the three Baltics who stood two steps apart from him.

"Dobryy vecher, Prussia!" he said happily with that childish smile upon his face. "I see you're giving a good example of yourself to this..." he glance his innocent eyes at Sealand who eyed him fearfully. "Child." He finally said.

"HA!" Prussia scoffed half-heartedly at the Russian. "You think you're so-HIC-good with that freaking face of yours, but you're just-HIC-a jerk who can't tie his shoelaces!"

Russia looked over to Sealand and said, "Young child," Russia said carefully so she would listen. "I think you should take this idiot away before he makes a mess on the floor." Then Russia peeked up at Prussia who sneered at him. "We wouldn't want his disgusting vomit all over our floor, would we?"

Prussia tried to get on his feet, lifting his fists up in the air but suddenly collapsed to the ground, falling asleep and snoring loudly.

"Oh dear, it looks like Prussia's asleep!" Russia said happily, facing the passed out Prussian. "And we were going to have our challenge tonight, what a shame."

"Wha-what challenge?" Sealand asked suddenly.

"Usually we would have a drinking contest," Russia explained sweetly to Sealand. "Whoever drank the most alcohol would have to do whatever the winner wants, and I already won." Russia then bent down and glared maliciously at him. "Looks like Prussia will become One with me, da?"

"Wait, what if I...take his place?" Sealand said out of the blue, the Baltics gasped at her and Belarus from a far off corner raised an eyebrow at her, almost trying to say "IF YOU WIN, I WILL BITCH SLAP YOUR FACE OFF!"

"Oh, you drink vodka?" Russia asked happily.

"Um...yeah, I do." Sealand lied.

Russia's smile widened. "You are a terrible liar," he admitted bluntly and enjoyed silently at Sealand's flushed face, "but I accept your challenge. Let's go, da?" And Russia walked away casually with his two henchmen Lithuania and Estonia who gave nervous glances at Sealand.

Latvia managed without getting caught to sneak over to Sealand's side, she jumped down and prepared to follow, Latvia grabbed her shoulder suddenly and pulled her slightly back so he could whisper in her ear.

"Miss Sealand, I am begging you," he begged. "Don't go and look for a fight when you're too small!"

Sealand's blue eyes flushed in waves of fury. "How dare you? Here I am, trying to help one of the greatest nations on earth-"("Hungary, you're a whore…" Prussia muttered sleepily)-"and you're telling me, a nation just like you, to not pick a fight?"

Sealand marched away with stomping feet, leaving Latvia to Prussia who was hugging the stool and disgustingly licking it when it had someone's bubblegum on it.

When Sealand got over to Russia's table, she started to feel a little regretful of her decision...

XxXxXxX

Everyone around them was in a huge circle, shouting "CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!" at Russia and Sealand as they drank vodka while it was just half past ten, way over Sealand's curfew. Sealand only drank twenty-two cups of vodka while Russia was on his twenty-third cup already, insouciantly drinking his fourth cup as Sealand started hiccupping uncontrollably.

"Oh god, Brit, I-HIC-feel like poop!" Sealand slurred drunk-like, waving her empty cup in the air as she laughed hysterically. "Why's the world so...Lat, what do you call it? Wait, STUPID, that's what I-HIC-mean! What am I again? Cause I usually thought I was a boy named Peter, how weird was that?"

Nations (and micronations who got in secretly after hearing Sealand was actually doing this) all started to become agitated when they saw how drunk Sealand started to become, worst of all was that Sweden and Finland weren't around to stop them having this drink fest.

Sealand took another drink, her twenty-third cup while Russia took his twenty-fifth cup as if he was going easy on her.

That was his hugest mistake.

Sealand snatched the silver-colored vodka bottle and-without warning-gulped the abysmal drink and in a mil of a second, the vodka inside the bottle was gone.

Everyone became silent.

"Did Sealand won, aru?" China asked, tilting his head.

"I calculated each cup and combining the leftover vodka inside the bottle and the results were fifty-one cups..." Estonia proclaimed, knowing his decision of telling would upset Russia. "So Sealand won."

HELL YEAH!

Everyone cheered vociferously when they grabbed Sealand and started hugging or shaking her hand as she start to feel lightheaded and nauseous...

Sealand right then vomited by accident on the ground, and that is when everyone knew to never let Sealand overdrink alcohol.

Another chapter, another adventure for Fem! Sealand who's going to become a Nation no matter what! Thank you all for your reviews and kind support, and soooo sorry for not getting this chapter out, but I PROMISE to have another out soon as possible, and for heads up, here's a hint for the fifth one below!

Card-chan- Yes, this is a SeaxLat story, and you'll see lots of INTERESTING THINGS SOON!

Chapter 5- "I had a nickname in junior high, and I loathe to say this: 'potato lady.' Rashida Jones