A/N: Right. So everybody has been looking forward to this chapter (I HOPE) and I wanted to post this earlier but you know... School and all. Please pardon my pathetic excuses. Anyway, here it is. The chapter to end this ridiculously angst-y two-shot! I really hope you enjoy it, because I really did put my all into this. Three months without any composition writing has left me rusty.
~Few years later~
Ritsu lies on the bed, staring up at the dark ceiling. She wonders if Mio is still a scaredy-cat. If she is still scared of all the things Ritsu had to protect her from: the dark, insects, barnacles…
Ritsu swallows when she thinks of someone else wrapping their arms around Mio, comforting her when she's scared. After all these years, Ritsu still has not stopped thinking about Mio, and loving her. And maybe she stopped trying and resigned herself to her fate. She didn't mind being alone, she'd spent so many years alone. So many sleepless nights just like this. She has a great job, and can definitely afford a better apartment than the one she is currently residing in, the one Mio had shared with her, but she doesn't want to move.
There is something about this place. Something that keeps her from leaving, from moving on, no matter how hard she tries. She remembers every little detail of Mio in every single thing. The bed sheets, the utensils, the sofa. Maybe it isn't healthy to stay where the person you miss most used to belong, but Ritsu couldn't just throw away everything and start afresh. She didn't want to forget Mio.
Ritsu sighs in defeat and sits up. Her eyes drift to the slip of paper Mugi gave her. The slip of paper contains the address of her source of sleepless nights. Her hands shake slightly as she picks it up. Mio is so near, yet so far away. She pictures Mio's face. The many interesting emotions she could show flits across her face. Anger. Fright. Sadness. Hurt. And happiness… The emotion that lights up her entire face and makes her shine like the sun.
Ritsu groans and runs her hand through her hair, it is still the same hairstyle as before. How would Mio look now? She wonders. And a sudden course of determination, a warm fiery feeling, shoots through her body. I don't care, she thinks. I need to see Mio now. Now.
And so she goes, just like that, carrying her acoustic guitar with her, because we all know how impulsive Ritsu can be. She had taught herself to play the guitar a few years ago, and she loves hearing the different sounds chords make linger in the air. Some could sound sad, some happy. She could strum a chord that fit her mood, and that made her happy, to be able to convey such deep emotions with music.
Ritsu exhales, watching the puff of white vapour escape her mouth. She strums the guitar lightly, and starts to play a song stuck in her mind for a while. She sings softly, meaning every word of the song. And hoping that maybe Mio can somehow hear her.
Sitting here wide awake
Thinking about when I last saw you
I know you're not far away
Close my eyes and I still see you
Lying here next to me
Wearing nothing but a smile
Ritsu smiles. Her vocals are definitely getting better.
I gotta leave right away
Counting cracks along the pavement
To see you face to face
Thinking about the conversation
I know I'm not one to change
I've never wanted nothing more
But as I walk up to your door
Ritsu arrives at Mio's house. It is a terrace, medium-sized and gives off a very cozy feel. She stands right in front of the gate, and looks around. Perhaps Mio would be up at 2am. Ritsu chuckles at the thought. Suddenly, a light comes on in the living room. Ritsu hides in the shadows, behind a tree. She peeps out cautiously, though she doubts that anyone would see her standing in the dark.
Her heart stops. Her breath hitches. Mio stands in the living room, talking happily to someone. Mio. The one Ritsu had missed so tremendously all these years. The love of her life. Mio seems to glow, and maybe it's the lighting, but Ritsu doesn't care. She's mesmerised at the sight of Mio. Her hair is a little shorter, but other than that she looks the same, perhaps maybe happier…
And just as Ritsu is about to barge in and declare her undying love for Mio—once again, because we all know how impulsive she is—a man steps into her view. Her heart stops again. Then it clenches, painfully, as though it is being pricked by red-hot needles, just like how it felt three years ago.
Ritsu cannot hear what they are saying, but she can see. She sees Mio laughing and having the time of her life. She sees the man smiling at her and laughing along. She has no right to judge him really, and he could be someone really righteous and kind, but in that moment she hates him. She hates him—for a brief moment—then she thinks. For what? Making Mio happy? And she feels angry at herself for being so selfish and hung up on Mio.
She's happy without you, a voice in her mind speaks softly, and sadly. She's moved on. You need to stop thinking about her.
"I can't help it," she whispers to herself. She watches them start to dance around the living room, acting so giddily in love that her heart breaks again, newly opened wounds start to bleed. And this time, she pours her heart into the song.
I'm standing in the dark
She's dancing on the table
Looking through the glass
She's someone else's angel
It may sound stupid that I'm wanting you back
But I'm wanting you back, girl
And now I'm standing in the dark dark
Oh dark dark
All I wanna do is hide
But I can't stop myself from staring
Wishing his hands were mine
I can't stop myself from caring
And as he turns down the lights
I'm feeling paralysed
And as he looks into her eyes
Ritsu sings with her eyes open, even though she wants to close them, her voice breaking on the last word. She thinks that she should stop doing this to herself, opening up old wounds—maybe they weren't healed in the first place—and being so stuck in the past that she can't move on. She watches them lean closer to each other, and when their lips are barely touching she turns away and sobs into her hands, sounding so pathetically weak she can't help but chastise herself, for being so weak when it comes to Mio.
After all this time, she is still a masochist.
And hopelessly in love with Mio.
Ritsu finds the strength to continue singing and strumming, trying to ignore her heart pounding painfully against her ribcage. Her poor heart. She wonders if there is any chance of patching it up and healing. Probably not.
Standing in the dark
I'm standing in the dark
I'm standing in the dark
She's dancing on the table
Looking through the glass
She's someone else's angel
It may sound stupid that I'm wanting you back
But I'm wanting you back, girl
And now I'm standing in the dark dark
Oh dark dark, oh dark dark
She's someone else's angel
She's someone else's angel
Ritsu runs her fingers along the strings at the last sentence, the chord resounding softly through the night along with her voice, raw with emotion.
"Ritsu?! What are you doing here?" a voice, one that Ritsu can never forget, asks beside her. Ritsu turns her head slowly. She is finally face to face with the one she had missed for so long—too long—and she takes her time to scan Mio's face.
Let go, her mind says gently. You've been hurting for too long.
It's the last time, she tells herself. The last time she will ever allow herself to see Mio. She looks into Mio's beautiful slate grey eyes, glittering in the darkness.
"Did you hear me?" Ritsu asks, ignoring Mio's question. "Singing, I mean?"
"…Yes," Mio admits. She fidgets, unsure of where to put her hands, though her eyes stare unwaveringly at Ritsu, piercing right through her.
Ritsu smiles softly. It seems unreal, to be standing so closely to Mio.
"I'm getting married next month." Ritsu's heart skips a beat, even though she was expecting that. "I don't think you'll be going, right?"
"No, I'm not. Congrats, though." Ritsu turns to go home. And this time, she's not expecting a hand to grab hers.
Mio almost does.
But she doesn't.
Last A/N: ...I'm supposed to be doing a project now but- *shot* Okay. Sorry! Were you guys expecting a happy ending? Hah. Angst is better without fluff after :D *shot again* Anyway, I really want to know how to improve on my writing, get tips and such, so... if you like the story, please review and favourite ^^ It would mean so much to me :3 Thanks for reading this two-shot, especially if it stabs you right in DA FEELS.
x
Joeh
P.S. Btw did anyone get that tiny 'I Almost Do' reference at the end? Huehuehue. *gets hit by rotten eggs*