A/N: Well, college has resumed, with all its various commitments, scheduling issues, and homework burdens. But in a strange way, I'm glad to be back.
There will be more MBFAW updates, I promise! This is just a tiny drabble to let you all know that I'm not dead. Partially inspired by several Internet articles and the excellent book Paper Towns, by John Green. Sadly, I still do not own either of these characters.
"You're a manic pixie dream girl."
"...who are you and what have you done with my husband?"
It was, in most respects, a perfectly ordinary Friday night in the Addams-Beineke household. A roaring fire bathed the parlor in flickering light; that the flames remained behind the fire screen still surprised Lucas, given the height to which the blaze had been built. The young man was reading Time magazine while his wife, sitting on the moldering sofa, pored over the writings of Shan Yu.
Or rather, that had been the scene until a moment ago. Now, Wednesday was staring in horror at Lucas, who had looked up from the magazine with a slightly amused look.
"No, really," he continued. "I've just been reading this article, and you're a classic manic pixie dream girl."
Her mouth opened and closed a few times, but no sound came out. Finally, she stood and lunged for the shelf that held the phone book.
"What are you doing?" Lucas asked as she began rifling frantically through the pages.
"Looking up divorce lawyers."
He rolled his eyes, still smiling in that way that drove his wife crazy (-ier). "Di, let me explain."
"You had better," she said, looking up from the Yellow Pages to glare daggers at him.
Lucas glanced back at the page. "It says here that the manic pixie dream girl is a fictional archetype, a woman who comes along and pulls an introverted man out of his boring life by being quirky and adventurous. Q.E.D-" he looked up at the still-glaring Wednesday- "manic pixie dream girl."
His wife was silent for a moment, staring out the cracked window at the accumulating snow beyond. When she at last spoke, it was with the tone of someone trying very hard not to scream.
"That's either a lovely compliment or a grave insult, and either way, if you call me a- a- manic pixie dream girl one more time, I will rip out your vocal cords and strangle you with them."
"Alright," he replied, folding the magazine over the arm of his chair, "but you have to admit that it's true."
A quiet snort from the direction of the window.
"Well, it is. Remember how I was before I met you?"
"Remember how you still are around everybody but me?"
He made a vague noise of protest. "Give me some credit. What about your family?"
"I'll grant you Pugsley," she said wryly, wandering over to where he sat. The ancient armchair was torn in several places (a consequence of having come from the Addams nursery), and Wednesday idly began to pick fluff from a rip in the back.
"Fine," Lucas sighed.
She stared down at him. It was ludicrous, really. His life hadn't been that boring before they met- after all, he'd defied his parents' wished and gone to a New York college to major in English. If either of their lives had been dull, it was-
No. No, she couldn't say that in all honesty. Her life may have been a bit...narrow, but it had never been uninteresting.
But maybe there was something missing.
As Wednesday touched his cheek, she felt Lucas relax slightly. The danger, it seemed, had passed. Suddenly, however, she grabbed his collar and yanked him up until his ear was level with her lips.
With a faint smirk, she whispered, "It takes one to know one, Mr. Pixie."
A/N: For those who are interested, more information on the manic pixie dream girl phenomenon can be found on the Internet- just do a Google search. See also: almost any character played by Zooey Deschanel. Though she may fill the same role in a minor, implied capacity, Wednesday's not nearly as one-dimensional as the average MPDG (not to mention, she's a more major character than Lucas).