Chapter 5

Zim sat in his lab, staring at images and articles about dating on the computer screen. A look of anxiety was plastered on his face.

As his eyes were glued to the screen, GIR came charging into the room, his screaming obnoxiously loud. "WHATCHA DOOOOINNN?"

Zim jumped, screaming as he looked around the room frantically. He then noticed that it was only his dumb robot servant. "GIR! Get out of here! I'm working!"

"WHAT'S THAT?" The little robot shouted.

Zim immediately turned to the screen and took down all the images and articles, revealing the background. He turned back to GIR. "Nothing! It was nothing You didn't see ANYTHING!" He said defensively. GIR merely tilted his head to the side in confusion.

Zim pointed to the door. "Go do something useful and stop bothering me!"

GIR's eyes went from aqua green to red as he saluted his master. "YES SIR!" He said before flying out of the room on his rocket feet.

Zim sighed in relief before looking back at the computer screen and bringing everything back up. As he read further, he starts to twitch. His teeth start grinding and his eyes begin to flicker. Finally, he shut off the computer, unable to take anymore. He let out a short scream and dropped his head onto the control panel. He groaned in exasperation. "What am I DOING?" He lifted his head back up. "I am an Irken Invader! I shouldn't be feeling this way!" He stood up and walked out of the lab. "Something must be done..."

Zim walked through the base, talking to himself. "Listen Danny. As an Irken Invader, I have to take back my invitation on the date. I may be a Defective like you, but that shouldn't mean I can just go around and betray my own Empire, like YOU already have! And, uh, I take back everything I said about you being cute. You're not cute. You're actually hideous. Like a dog. I'm sorry. But then again, I'm really not. You just have to accept the fact that I'm too good for you. So get on with your horrible life while you still can before I DESTROY IT!..." Zim smiled to himself. "Yeah, that should work."

He stood smiling for a moment before a look of desperation washed over his face. He then brought his hands to his face in frustration. "I CAN'T DO IT!" He hung his head, ready to burst into tears at any moment. "What am I going to do?..."

"AW, MASTAH! WHY YOU ALL SAD?" GIR shouted, popping up in front Zim out of nowhere.

Startled, Zim inhaled deeply and screamed, fists in the air. "I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE!" He grabbed GIR's face, staring him in the eyes. "I mean, of course I like Danny, but it's not like it's OKAY!" He looked up, picking up the small robot and holding him close.

"All I wanted to do was show her my appreciation for her kind words and actions, but I think I went too far! I actually ASKED her to go out with me, and she AGREED! If the Tallests were to ever find out about this, I'd be killed for sure!" He held GIR up by his head, looking him in the eyes again. "I don't know what I'm going to do, GIR!"

The phone rang.

Zim looked at the phone, rather dumbfounded. He dropped GIR and walked over to the phone and picked it up. "Hello?" He asked, wondering who could be calling him on this primitive Earth-phone.

Danny's voice sounded from the other end. "Hey Zim!" She said, rather cheerily.

Zim squealed to himself nervously then spoke into the phone, trying to keep his head. "Ehhh, h-hi Danny."

"Are you ok? You sound a little stressed." Danny said with a hint of concern in her voice.

"No, no! Don't be sillyyy, I'm perfectly normal! Yup. Prrretty normal."

"Um...okay... Anyway, I was calling to see if we're still on for that date."

"Uhh...s-sure! I mean, why not? It's just us two Defective Irkens after all, right?" Zim said, his heart racing.

"yyyyyyyyeah...Zim, are you sure you're ok?"

Zim trembled slightly, nearly dropping the phone. He catches it and puts it back up to his "ear", but he's left speechless.

"Zim? Are you still there?"

"Y-yes..." Zim slapped is forehead. "Danny, why are we doing this? We're betraying our own Empire."

Danny spoke with a tinge of annoyance in her voice. "No. We're not. I'm not even PART of the Empire anymore. The Tallest don't even know I exist. And as for YOU..." Danny sighed, her voice softening. "Zim, I know you don't believe this, but the Tallests are betraying you. I've told you this before."

"Danny, don't tell me you still think those lies are true! I am an Invader no matter WHAT Jaz tells you!" A fresh wave of anxiety came over him as he continues. "Which is exactly why I'm so nervous about this! If the Tallests were to know about this—"

"They won't find out! Because no one is going to tell them!"

"What if GIR tells them?! I can't exactly keep him shut off."

"I don't think GIR will be a problem. He's too easily distracted to care about what we're doing."

"Mmm...yeah, I guess so..." Zim said, not convinced.

"See? There's nothing to worry about."

"But...how in the world are we going to DO this!? Irkens never do ANYTHING that's anywhere related to dating! I don't know how to...and neither do you."

"Now hold on a minute. I never said I didn't know anything about dating. I've been on this planet long enough to know a thing or two."

"But, I've been here longer than YOU." Zim said defensively.

"And what were you DOING this whole time? Planning this planet's destruction. I'VE been studying the humans ever since I got here."

"Hey, I've been studying the humans, too!" Zim paused, thinking. "But then again, I have been pretty occupied with my plans."

"Exactly."

"So...it's...OKAY we're going out...right?" Zim asked, unsure.

Danny sighed. "Yes, Zim. It's okay."

"Even though I'm still betraying my Empire..."

Danny swallowed the urge to snap at him and took a deep breath. "Hey, What they don't know won't hurt 'em, right?"

Zim thought about this for a moment before coming to a realization. "Y...you know...you're right, Danny. I shouldn't worry. I am Zim! And Invader Zim never worries! I'm...I'm sure we'll be just fine, like you said."

"There. You see? All it takes a little positivity."

Zim laughed in relief, but quickly grew nervous again. "Still, I'm still not sure how to do this whole date-thing."

"You're a fast learner. You'll catch on." Danny said reassuringly.

"Okay. So, uhhh...I'll...see you this afternoon then?"

"Yup!" Danny replied, sounding rather chipper.

"Good! I'll talk to you later. I have to get a couple repairs done so the base will be protected while I'm gone."

"Okay! See you soon!"

"Bye, Danny." Zim hung up the phone, smiling. He looked around the room, feeling rather confident. "I have nothing to be afraid of. As long as I keep this secret away from the base, I'll be fine."

GIR sat on the floor, staring up at his master with his large, blue-green eyes and his goofy grin.

Zim looked at the little robot and pointed at him. "You didn't hear aanyythiiing...RIGHT?!"

GIR looked confused for a moment before blurting out excitedly, "NOPE!"

Zim smiled triumphantly. "Good, GIR."

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!" GIR exclaimed, as if he had just won a fantastic prize.

"Now, I'm going back down to the lab to work on the repairs. You just stay here and...watch TV or something."

"SCARY MUNKY SHOW!" GIR Shouted, running to the TV and plopping down in front of it.

"And don't answer the door for anyone, alright?" Zim said, though knowing how pointless it was to say it. "Well at least you won't cause me much trouble while you're up here..." He then walked over to the toilet in the kitchen and flushed himself down to the lab.