Author's Notes: Thank you all for your feedback! I know I probably sound like a broken record but you guys are so awesome and encourage me daily. I so appreciate it!
Just a quick note that some of the characters are acting somewhat unlike themselves, but I've been bad to them and put them all under crazy stress so I wrote them a little out of character. Because if I was Jo right now I would be a basket case :)
Jo Wilson scrolled through the images on her nurse's cell phone taking in the sweet mischievous smiles of the woman's grandson, "He is so cute Doreen. You should be proud."
"Oh I am, he's my pride and joy. You'll understand that feeling soon," Jo could sense the older woman smiling as she pushed the wheelchair towards the ICU.
"I can't wait," Jo said softly with a sad smile. Just four short days ago nothing excited her more. Now she was terrified by the thought that their baby may be terribly sick or that Alex would still be in a coma and miss everything or even worse that both would happen. Jo was constantly fearful that their precious baby would be born early with multiple challenges and she would be alone to handle everything along with caring for Alex. It amazed her that she was so scared of being alone to deal with things when just a few short years ago the thought of letting anyone in her life petrified her. "I really appreciate you doing this Doreen, but you should go home and spend time with your family," Jo said as graciously as she could.
"Honey, when my daughter had a placental abruption, she was so scared and bored out of her mind at the same time. I can't imagine her handling that all alone, and her husband wasn't in the ICU," Doreen stopped the wheelchair and pushed a button on the wall to open the doors to the intensive care unit. "You need to learn to let people help you," the nurse said with a knowing grin as she started to push the chair again.
As they entered the ICU, they came face to face with Dr. Stevens who smiled brightly as she came over, "Jo! Long time no see, you are looking better."
Jo managed a real smile, "Thank you Dr. Stevens, I feel much better."
"Daniels took you off bedrest?" Dr. Stevens asked skeptically while looking at Doreen.
"Only for fifteen minutes a day to come see Alex and only if I'm in the chair. Plus bathroom breaks. I don't know which I'm more excited about, I'll never look at a bedpan the same way again," Jo added with a self-depreciating laugh.
Dr. Stevens smiled, "Why don't I take you in there so Doreen can get back on the floor."
The middle-aged nurse spoke up, "Oh I'm off the clock Dr. Stevens."
The blond looked surprised, "Well then go home Doreen. I can take Jo back when it's time."
Doreen looked conflicted for a moment before Jo spoke up, "Go see that cutie grandson. Someone around here will get me back if Dr. Stevens has to leave."
Doreen smiled at Jo, "I'll see you tomorrow then with pot roast and potatoes."
"Thank you Doreen. For everything," Jo said sincerely and handed the phone back.
The older woman gave a smile and squeezed Jo's hand before turning and walking away. "How in the world did you do that?" Dr. Stevens asked with a shocked look on her face.
"Do what?" Jo asked confused.
"Get her to be nice. She's generally the hardest nurse on the floor and doesn't get close to anyone. And she's bringing you home-cooked meals."
Jo shrugged her good shoulder, "It's the orphan thing. A lot of the nurses are going out of their way to help me since learning I don't have parents. Especially the older ones with kids close to my age. They feel sorry for me."
Dr. Stevens began to push the wheelchair and headed for Alex's room, "Can I ask what happened to your parents?" she asked gently.
Jo sighed, "You can ask, but I don't have an answer. I was abandoned as a baby and raised in state custody. I don't know where any of my family is." Except in an ICU bed, Jo thought sorrowfully.
Dr. Stevens pushed Jo up to Alex's right side and took a seat across the bed from her, "I can't imagine," she offered, quietly shaking her head.
Jo paused, collecting her thoughts, "I worry a lot that I'm going to be a terrible mother. I was so terrified when the stick turned blue. What on earth do I know about raising a family, you know?" Jo looked up from her hand in Alex's to glance at Dr. Stevens before looking back down at their hands. "I mean you can read all the books, but how can I be sure I won't give up? How do I know I'll bond with our child? Obviously my parents didn't bond with me."
"Have you talked to your husband about those fears?" Dr. Stevens asked gently.
Jo felt the corner of her lip turn up as she gazed at Alex's face, "All the time," Jo said quietly. "He has some of the same worries about himself. We...we are cut from the same cloth in a lot of ways."
"How so?" Dr. Stevens asked softly.
"He had an awful childhood filled with abuse and neglect, too. He spent several years in foster care himself and..."
"He did?" Dr. Stevens asked sharply.
Jo could feel her eyes widen and her head snapped towards the other woman, "Yeah, but please don't mention that when he wakes up. He doesn't tell many people about that even now. He's stubborn that way," Jo said with a smile as her fingers lightly played with the bandages that had replaced his hair. "Like I said, we're cut from the same cloth in a lot of ways."
"How long had you been together when you learned about that similar history?"
Jo gave a lighthearted laugh, "We kinda disliked each other when we first discovered that. I thought he was an insufferable ass and he thought I was a spoiled crybaby. Finding out that about each other made us friends though, best of friends. We didn't start dating until several months later, in part because of our joint stubbornness." Jo bent to kiss Alex's hand, "He was worth the wait though."
Jo could see Dr. Stevens nod out of the corner of her eye, "The good ones always are."
A comfortable silence fell over them as Jo studied Alex carefully like she did on each visit. She took in his vitals and watched the monitors as if they were movie screens playing an epic blockbuster. Her eyes wandered to his left side to observe the healing bruises and cuts along his arm and hand. She began to laugh quietly to herself, but for some reason instead of quelling the giggles as she knew she should, she began to laugh loudly.
Jo glanced at Dr. Stevens, who was looking at her as if she had just grown a second head. This made Jo laugh even harder. The blonde leaned forward with her eyebrows furrowed, "Are you okay?"
Jo tried to stifle the fit of giggles, "I'm sorry. It's just the past few days I've sat here and stared at his left hand trying to figure out what's wrong with it. I've been preoccupied with swelling, bruising, circulation, you name it because it just looks weird...something's different about it." Jo looked up to take in Dr. Stevens' confused face, "It just hit me it's because his wedding ring is off. It's rare that I see him without it, he only takes it off for surgeries and then you can't tell because of the gloves."
Dr. Stevens leaned back in the chair, "I'm sorry, I don't understand why that's funny."
Jo smirked as she looked back at Alex, "I know, it's not really. It's just he has always said he would need a damn good reason to not wear it. I can't wait to tell his sorry ass that almost dying in a rental car is not a good enough excuse."
"Is he as brash with you as you are with him?" Dr. Stevens asked nonchalantly.
"Sometimes. We communicate best that way I think," Jo looked lovingly at Alex and slowly shook her head. "What I wouldn't do for a sarcastic remark right now."
At that moment Dr. Clifford walked in, "Maybe you'll hear one soon. His scans are good, no rebleed and he is now breathing over the vent some. Reflexes are still intact and his inter-cranial pressures are coming down." Dr. Clifford finished his neuro exam and then looked up at Jo, "How are you holding up?"
"I'm okay," Jo responded as confidently as she knew how.
"How would you feel about moving in here?"
Jo snapped her head up to study the neurosurgeon, "Really?"
"Yes. The nurses have noticed his blood pressure readings are much lower when you visit so I would really like it if you were here a majority of the time. You are healing nicely, if you lived nearby you would have probably already been discharged."
Dr. Stevens spoke up, "I'm not sure if..."
Dr. Clifford cut her off, "I've already ran it by Daniels. We will need to work out some logistics about getting you back to the floor at least weekly to be checked and we will need to put a real bed in here for you. But I feel it would be better for both of you to be together."
Jo couldn't help the big smile that formed, "Damn straight!"
Dr. Clifford smiled warmly, "I'll let you know when we work everything out. Ortho needs to go in and make some adjustments to the hardware in his foot. We'll probably revisit that in a couple of days. Right now I feel he's a little too unstable to go back in unless absolutely necessary, but he's getting there. And faster than I had anticipated."
Jo smiled weakly, "He would. He has never really had people take care of him before, he doesn't know how to handle it. He'll be an overachiever just to avoid being dependent on others."
Dr. Clifford smiled encouragingly, "It looks to me like you do a great job of taking care of him."
Jo smiled up at the neurosurgeon before looking longingly at Alex, "We take care of each other."
Dr. Clifford patted her shoulder and quietly left the room.
Dr. Stevens quietly spoke up, "Jo I think it's time to get you back to your room."
All at once Jo felt her emotions start to overwhelm her. All the fear she had been trying to quell since the accident came bubbling to the surface, "I don't know what I would do without him. He's my rock. The only person that has stood by me day in and day out for so long." Jo fought back tears, "And he is going to be a phenomenal father. You should see him with kids, it's the sweetest thing. He was born to be a pediatric surgeon, he's so damn good. Plus he looks sexy as hell with babies." Jo paused to gather her thoughts, "I need to go full term with this baby to give him a chance to be awake and able to enjoy it. He deserves to be there for everything, he deserves to fully enjoy the birth of our baby. He has had to get through so much crap in his life, why can't he catch a break? He only deserves good things but he keeps getting thrown more shit."
Jo noticed that Dr. Stevens had walked over to her side and knelt beside the wheelchair, "I know...I know it sucks, but the best thing you can do is stay as calm as you can. It will help him, the baby, and you. Okay?"
Jo nodded her head quickly, "You're right. I'll be okay." She looked back at Alex and rubbed his arm, "He has a tendency to make me feisty."
Dr. Stevens smiled, "I've noticed. Let's get you back to your room."
Jo nodded before glancing back at Alex, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her again, "I love you van Winkle, and I really wish you would wake up already." She kissed her fingers before placing them on his cheek and softly ran her fingers over the uninjured side of his face, "I miss you, Alex. And so does baby boy." She then pulled his right hand to her abdomen and held it there for a minute before squeezing it lightly and gingerly placing his limp hand back on the bed.
Dr. Stevens then began to push her out of the room. When they got several feet down the hall Dr. Stevens ventured, "Why do you refer to the baby as a boy when you know it's a girl?"
Jo laughed followed by a slight sniffle, "Alex and I have been going back and forth over the gender ever since I told him I was pregnant. He has always thought it would be a girl and I was so sure we would have a boy. I just don't want him to subliminally hear me and either think something's wrong or worse have him wake up all smug knowing he was right." Jo snickered again, "You'd have to know him to really understand that."
"You're probably right," Dr. Stevens agreed quietly.