Eternity

by CrowX

Damon had promised his brother an 'eternity full of misery'. But will Damon be able to fulfill this promise or is the bond between him and Stefan too strong? They will meet again and again throughout time and places, experiencing good and bad times while challenging each other. Warnings: incest, slash, mature themes, drug use (in the 60s).

14. Chapter 14

Title: Eternity
Authors: Ayumie and CrowX
Fandom: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Damon/Stefan
Word count: 15374
Warnings: Incest, slash and some violence and kinky scenes

Summary: Damon had promised his brother an 'eternity of misery'. But will Damon be able to fulfill this promise or is the bond between him and Stefan too strong? They will meet again and again throughout time and places, experiencing good and bad times while challenging each other. Incest, slash, mature themes.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Notes: First I want to apologize for the long silence. The last months were quite eventful both for me and my fellow author, Ayumi, so there wasn't much time to read over this chapter.

Many thanks to my beta-reader Dysprositos, she corrected the whole long chapter so fast! Thank you.

Instead of two chapters as promised in my profile, I decided to post one long chapter.

I hope you like it and I would love to get many reviews.

Again, sorry for the long wait!

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ETERNITY

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Chapter 14

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The saying that time flies when you have fun proved true. Damon was surprised when he realized one summer evening that already a few years had passed since he had left Mystic Falls. Lounging in a shady saloon, he drank awful whiskey, feeling quite bored.

He had explored the wilder side of America, relishing the rough way of living. With a motor plane, this time a smaller, much more agile one - a blood-red Cessna C-37 - he explored the small towns, enjoying the mayhem he caused.

That evening, he took two lovely whores to the small backroom, drinking and fucking both of them until one of them died. Needing a new form of entertainment, he gave the other his blood and, after a while, he broke her neck, curious as to how this would work out.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan met up with Lexi only a few weeks after Mystic Falls. They hugged happily and immediately started to catch up. Although Stefan tried not to complain about his brother, he didn't want to lie or leave out anything important either.

In the end, he told her about the last months as neutrally as possible, and, to her credit, Lexi only nodded and refrained from commenting. Soon, Stefan was laughing about her stories, feeling cheerful and carefree in a way he only did in her company.

-xoXOXox-

The new vampire was quite amusing for Damon and he relished teaching her all about hunting and compelling. The girl – Jessie – had already had loose morals as a human and as a vampire, she was the ideal companion at Damon's side. Together they flew through the wilderness, feeding on whomever they wanted. But there was always something missing. She was not the brightest girl, and conversations with her were very boring.

The Great War, as they called it, had finally ended, but Damon decided to wait another five years at least before visiting Europe, not wanting to see the destruction. For now, he would return to the big cities, as he felt the need for some culture.

Damon's patience with the new vampire was rapidly running out. He decided to ditch her in the next big city and thus they went to San Francisco.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan had been drifting for the past few years, sometimes with Lexi, sometimes on his own. Most of the time, he was quite satisfied with his lot, even though he once more gave in and fed on human blood.

Occasionally, he received messages from Damon and although he rarely answered, he was always happy to hear that his brother was well. When one of those letters mentioned San Francisco, Stefan impulsively decided to go there as well. Since their last meeting, long years had passed and he was looking forward to seeing his brother.

-xoXOXox-

In San Francisco, Damon tried to attend some concerts and grand dinner affairs, but the uncouth ways of the girl were getting in the way. Furthermore, her careless way of feeding was making it difficult for him to keep a low profile. Even though he liked her ruthlessness, there were too many problems with keeping her, especially her annoying devotion to him.

Then the worst-case scenario happened. They were returning from a gallery opening when Damon saw his brother sitting in the big hotel foyer of the Four Seasons. Stefan had spotted them and came over, so there was nothing to do except introduce them.

"Stefan! It's so nice to see you, and what a surprise." Hugging him briefly, Damon gestured to Jessie.

"This is Jessie. Jessie, this is my brother, Stefan."

Since he had never bothered to tell her about his brother, he wasn't surprised at her curiosity.

-xoXOXox-

The second Stefan saw that there was a woman with his brother, he felt stupid. Why had he ever thought that this was a good idea? It was too late to turn back though. Damon introduced the girl as Jessie. Even worse, now that he was close enough, he could hear that she had no heartbeat.

"It's a pleasure to meet you."

Stefan wondered whether he sounded sincere. He turned to his brother.

"Hello, Damon. I didn't mean to impose on you. You are obviously busy."

-xoXOXox-

"Not at all, not at all, brother," Damon said quickly, hoping to find a good way out of this situation. Actually, it would be the perfect moment to ditch the girl. He pulled out a big bundle of notes and handed it Jessie.

"Here, go and buy something nice," he said dismissively, not caring about the angry glare she gave him as she stomped away.

"So, now we have some peace and quiet."

Sighing, he gestured to the hotel bar and they went to get some drinks.

"Sorry about her, you know when I'm bored I tend to do stupid things, and so I turned her. She is getting terribly annoying."

-xoXOXox-

Stefan knew that his disapproval was written in every line of his body. It was hard to keep from asking the questions that immediately popped into his mind: What were you thinking? What have you been teaching her? Why? Pressing his lips together, Stefan let himself be steered towards the bar.

"Just one drink, though. I don't even know what I'm doing here."

Looking back, Stefan could only shake his head at his own stupidity. It was obvious that he should never have come here. In the future, Stefan decided, he would never give in to this kind of idiotic impulse again.

"So what are you planning to do about her? Annoying or not, you turned her, so she's your responsibility."

-xoXOXox-

Damon didn't have to read minds to know his brother's opinion. He chugged a scotch, needing it to deal with this situation.

"First, she's not going to be my responsibility much longer. I taught her all there is to know about vampires. She has been one for nearly a year. I went to San Francisco to let her go. And it's going to be so great to finally be able to walk in the sunlight again."

He ordered another drink and looked his brother over.

"You look good, Stef. In spite of your bunny diet, you look quite healthy."

He leaned in to brush his lips against Stefan's ear and whispered:

"What do you think, let's go to another hotel. We have to celebrate our reunion."

-xoXOXox-

Gesturing to the bartender for another drink, Stefan shook his head.

"You're unbelievable. What makes you think there's anything to celebrate? Particularly since you just introduced me to my replacement."

Stefan slammed down his glass with more force than he had originally intended. If he stayed, he'd only end up berating Damon.

"I think I'd better go. I'm sure you and Jessie deserve each other."

It was supposed to be a parting shot, but Damon's hand on his arm held him back.

-xoXOXox-

"No, Stef, there will never be anyone to replace you. You're my brother. You're my lover. You're the only one person who's been there from the beginning, the only one who knows me."

Damon tried to convey his honesty and seriousness. He preferred his brother to the whore any given day.

"Just stay. I'll dump her. It was a stupid idea to turn her. I was curious. And bored."

He pulled his brother closer, as close as possible without anyone understanding his intentions, and slipped one hand inside his Stefan's shirt, stroking him lightly.

"Please…don't go." He murmured almost inaudibly, not knowing what else to say.

Unbeknownst to the brothers, Jessie was hiding behind a column, hearing every word of their conversation. With every new revelation her rage grew. She thought Damon had loved her, but he didn't, and now he was insulting her. Worse, he loved his brother. In that way. And he had withheld that he was able to go into the sunlight. Her fury increased as she planned her revenge.

-xoXOXox-

Of course, Stefan knew that Damon was only telling him what he wanted to hear in order to get him into bed. Those words had the desired effect however, since Stefan instinctively leaned closer, gasping softly as those wicked fingers found their way beneath his shirt.

In the end, he could only nod, all the while cursing his own weakness. As soon as he had signaled his agreement, Damon spirited them away and hurriedly checked them into another hotel.

Safe from spying eyes, they kissed hungrily. It had been so long. Suddenly impatient, Stefan shrugged out of his jacket. Now he remembered: This was why he was here.

-xoXOXox-

Happily, Damon helped his brother undress, taking care to caress each revealed body part softly. Getting impatient himself, Damon stripped in front of his nearly naked brother, showing off his body. At least this time his hair was impeccable.

"Do you like my new hairstyle? Quite a change from last time, isn't it?"

Not waiting for an answer, Damon kissed Stefan's neck and chest. Pushing their bodies together, he slipped his tongue inside his brother's mouth and explored the familiar cavern. They were both hard, the long time apart only fueling their desire for each other. Bucking into Stefan's hips, Damon looked him in the eye.

"Wanna take me?"

-xoXOXox-

Damon's naked body rendered Stefan speechless. Mouth working soundlessly, he could only stare. So beautiful. He ran his hand down that flawless chest, needing to touch, to feel that soft skin.

"I was just going to ask you the same thing..."

Stefan mouthed at his brother's throat, feeling the blood pump in his veins. It was incredibly tempting.

"Do you have anything to... to make it easier?"

After all these years, Damon would need all the help he could get.

-xoXOXox-

Groaning, Damon threw his head back, offering his neck up to his brother's ministrations. To feel Stefan, to smell him, was comforting and arousing at the same time.

"Maybe in the bathroom. There should be lotion."

He grabbed Stefan's arms tightly, pushing himself closer to rub his cock against Stefan's trousers. Opening them, he pulled out the erection. Damon wanted to taste it badly and, sinking down on his knees, he licked it from base to head, tasting the first droplet. Moaning at the delicious taste, he sucked most of the length in, creating an accelerating rhythm. Just before Stefan got to the brink of orgasm, Damon withdrew. Looking up to his brother under his lashes, he gestured to the bathroom.

"Don't take too long."

-xoXOXox-

Damon's mouth around his cock was just as good as he remembered. With a soft moan, Stefan rocked forward until suddenly his brother pulled away.

"What?"

Once he realized what was being asked of him, Stefan stumbled towards the bathroom. He had been mere seconds from coming, was all but aching with need and, worst of all, he had no idea how he was going to fuck Damon when he was just about ready to come.

At least the lotion was easy to locate. Back on the bed Damon was waiting for him, legs spread wide. Stefan groaned again. He was never going to make it.

-xoXOXox-

Chuckling, Damon watched as Stefan staggered towards him, his erect cock clearly just seconds from spurting. Maybe he should take care of it first. He really wanted a hard ride and that wasn't going to happen like this.

He stood up and motioned for Stefan to come closer. Standing in front of the bed, Stefan's erection was just before his mouth and Damon sucked him inside again. This time he stroked the soft balls as well, swallowing and sucking until his brother's seed was filling his mouth. Humming, Damon gulped it down, enjoying the familiar taste.

"Hmm, you taste so good. I've missed this."

He pulled Stefan down beside him and stroked him lightly, covering his whole body with soft kisses. Knowing his brother's stamina, it wouldn't take too long until he would get some, too.

-xoXOXox-

When Damon's mouth once more descended on him, Stefan came almost instantly. He shivered uncontrollably, vision going black for a moment. It didn't stop there, however. Damon's hands never left his body and soon Stefan found himself fully aroused once more, his fingers buried in that tight ass.

Using a lot of lotion, he focused on what he was doing, taking care to prepare Damon as thoroughly as possible. Judging by the noises his brother kept making, Stefan was successful. Finally, he pressed a kiss to his brother's flat stomach.

"Ready?"

-xoXOXox-

Getting desperate to feel his brother inside, Damon drew away and spread his legs once more, putting a cushion under his own hips. That way he would feel the most.

"Please. You have to take me now! Can't wait anymore!"

He whimpered with need when the head of Stefan's cock pressed against his entrance, relaxing himself as the slicked hardness pushed inside. Moaning, he shifted his hips back and forth, fucking himself on his brother's cock.

"It has been too long…"

-xoXOXox-

Damon was spread out in front of him like a feast. Stefan didn't hesitate. Since the first edge had been taken off his need, the initial slide in was smooth and slow. Too slow for the other vampire, who soon started to set his own rhythm. Chuckling softly, Stefan grabbed those slim hips and stilled them.

"Patience."

Ruthlessly suppressing his own need, Stefan moved slowly but forcefully. He could get used to this.

"Is this what you want?"

-xoXOXox-

Damon bucked his hips, impatiently groaning at the slow pace his brother set. He lay his head down on the pillow next to his elbows, trying to adjust to it.

"Yes. You could go a little faster, though. After all, I gave you enough pleasure to make you come once already."

He moaned again, this time it came from deep in his throat, more like a growl.

"Want to hear you talking about this without holding back, Stef. Tell me how much you like to fuck your older brother."

-xoXOXox-

Enjoying the way Damon was going frantic beneath him, Stefan kept up his slow pace a little longer. After all, he was in no hurry. Bending down, he nipped at his brother's shoulder.

"It ... it feels amazing. Having you beneath me, the way you open up for me just enough – your smell, the way you fit against me. You're like blood; I know you're not good for me, but I can't... There's no hope. No hope at all..."

Stefan knew that he was rambling, but he couldn't help it. He was moving faster now, all but pounding into his brother.

"Want you to come – now."

-xoXOXox-

Rewarding Stefan's dirty mouth, Damon moaned without abandon, whimpering each time his brother's cock brushed his prostate.

"Love hearing you like this."

He could barely utter a word as the thrusts became stronger, his whole body shaking with need.

He was just moments from coming. Clenching around Stefan's erection, he cried out his demand.

"Touch me! Stefan, touch me now!"

-xoXOXox-

Wanting to give as good as he had gotten, Stefan reached down and wrapped his fingers around Damon's cock. That was all it took. It was a rare treat to be sufficiently aware to watch Damon come. For once, Stefan got to see that beautiful face totally open and he couldn't get enough of it.

Then Stefan, too, came hard, hands gripping those slim hips as he pumped his seed into his brother's body. Afterwards, he collapsed on top of Damon, too worn out to move any longer. Only long minutes later did he manage to lift his head.

"So what are you planning to do once you've gotten rid of that girl?"

-xoXOXox-

It was one of the best fucks Damon had gotten in years. He knew that he would only ever be the bottom for his brother, but in exchange, he got the most pleasurable experience. Panting, he closed his eyes, slowly coming back to reality after such an intense high.

"I was going to explore the city, especially the cultural life. It was fun in the wild, but after a while, it gets annoying talking to stupid oafs instead of people who can actually use their brains. And that whore is no better."

He turned to his brother and extended a hand to softly stroke over the hard plains of the male body.

"Will you stay for a while? I promise, no clubs. Just museums, galleries, concerts and opera. What do you say?"

-xoXOXox-

"I don't know... What are you going to say to the girl? Are you just going to tell her to get lost?"

Looking at his brother, Stefan could tell that his guess had been spot on. He shook his head, not even knowing where to start. He mentally added this topic to the list of things they didn't talk about.

"Besides, if I left now you'd just come after me, wouldn't you?"

-xoXOXox-

Damon smirked and sat up slightly, leaning into the pillows.

"You've got it right. Of course, I wouldn't let you go just like that. We haven't seen each other in a decade! There's so much to talk about."

He leaned in to kiss his brother lazily, just enjoying the feeling of soft lips sliding over each other.

Meanwhile, an angry young vampire made plans to get revenge. Jessie had followed them to the hotel and heard what had been going on in the room. Disgusted and humiliated, she hurriedly started to look for vervain in flower shops, already having stored chains and stakes in an abandoned warehouse. Damon had taught her well and she would use that knowledge to pay him back.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan agreed to stay. They spent the next few days in town doing just as Damon had promised: They visited the museums and concerts and Stefan didn't see Jessie again. Sometimes, he felt that they were being followed, but that was probably just paranoia. Damon would have sent the girl away.

Then, one evening, when Stefan was coming home from a hunt, he suddenly felt a sharp pain in his arm. Looking down, he saw a syringe. What...? A second later, his legs buckled. It had to be vervain. But who would...?

-xoXOXox-

After the first evening with Stefan, Damon went back to his first hotel room and collected his stuff. When Jessie came in, he told her that she should be able to stand on her own feet and that he was leaving town. Surprisingly, she was very accepting, but Damon shrugged it off as good fortune.

The following days, Damon relished in being able to live the way he had been raised to. They went out a lot, diving into the cultural scene of San Francisco. A part of Damon would always stay refined even though he loved the wild untamed part of himself.

His brother surprisingly went along with everything and they had a nice time together, chatting about their family, society or politics, while getting reacquainted over and over again in the nights.

One evening, though, Stefan didn't return from his bunny hunt. Damon was waiting in the lounge, sipping his trademark scotch as the hours went by. Slowly but surely he got worried and late in the night he went out to search the Golden Gate Park for his brother.

-xoXOXox-

When Stefan woke up, he found that he couldn't move. His whole body was hurting from the vervain and his hands were tied behind his back. Jessie was looking down at him. Great. In a way, Stefan had always known that that someday his brother would get him killed.

"Oh good, you're awake. I'll call Damon, then."

Jessie pulled her chair to the wall and dialed the number of their hotel. It seemed to ring for a long time. When Damon finally picked up the phone, Jessie casually drove a wooden stake through Stefan's shoulder. Stefan screamed.

"Hello, Damon."

-xoXOXox-

Damon was surprised when his room telephone was ringing. Marveling over the technology, he picked it up only to have his whole world crashing down when he heard his brother's pained scream.

Jessie's voice made his vision reddened with rage.

"I'll treat your brother the same way you treated me, you bastard! With his strange animal diet, he seemed to feel it more, and the wounds take so long to close… it will be fun… for me! That'll teach you to fuck with me!"

When the line went dead, Damon stared at the phone, dread filling him. He couldn't believe that this was happening. It was his own fault. He clenched his fists. Somehow, he would find her and then he would do the torturing. First, he had to find them. Calling the telephone-operating center, he could get at least an estimate of which part of the city the call had been coming from. Since he knew what he'd been teaching her and considering that she was using a telephone, he concentrated on unoccupied offices. Damon rushed out, hoping to get a whiff of his brother's or the bitch's scent to track them down.

-xoXOXox-

At first, Stefan tried to reason with the girl. After all, he wasn't to blame for Damon's behavior. It didn't do any good. The girl was too angry, too vicious and really, he could see a lot of his brother in her.

Most of the time, Stefan was in too much pain to think clearly. Damon would be looking for him, he was certain of that, and he tried to cling to that thought through the worst of it. Lately, however, he had started to wonder whether that would make any difference. Perhaps he'd be killed anyway.

-xoXOXox-

Now that he was facing it himself, Damon could understand how people could lose their mind worrying. For two days, he had searched the part of town where the call had supposedly come from. He hoped that his brother was still alive, that he wouldn't think that Damon had given up on him.

It was the night of the third day after Stefan's abduction when he finally heard a faint noise through the quietness of the streets. It was coming from an abandoned office building. Speeding up, Damon used all his stealth to get inside unheard, reaching to his belt where he'd put a sharp stake. He sniffed out his brother's blood, overpowering all other scents. Finally he'd found him. Turning around a corner, he saw them: Stefan was chained to a pillar, looking pale with blood dripping from many wounds. Jessie was standing before him, apparently dripping vervain on his skin, making it burn.

Like a whirlwind, Damon was upon her, driving the stake through her stomach. As weak as she was, she passed out and Damon could unchain his brother.

"God, Stefan! I'm so sorry…"

-xoXOXox-

Stefan almost fell as he was released from his bonds. Gradually growing aware of his brother's presence at his side, he forced his exhausted body to straighten. It wouldn't do to show weakness.

"Took you... long enough. Need to feed..."

Gritting his teeth, Stefan stumbled to where the girl was lying. The wooden stake was still embedded in her stomach and he took hold of it, swiftly pulling it out and driving it through her heart. She was a threat so she had to be killed, but he didn't want to let her fall into Damon's hands. This had used up the last of his strength, however, and Stefan dropped to his knees.

-xoXOXox-

Damon was furious when his revenge was taken away.

"Why did you do that now? She deserved to be tortured! I wanted to pay her back for hurting you…!"

But as his brother stumbled, Damon was by his side in an instant. He bit his wrist and brought it to Stefan's mouth.

"Drink up, brother. Take as much as you need…"

His brother looked about ready to faint and Damon pressed his wrist further against his mouth, relieved when the fangs sank in and Stefan finally swallowed his blood. Damon hugged Stefan close and stood up, carrying him bridal style while still feeding him. He would take care of his baby brother, he swore.

"Let's get back to the hotel."

-xoXOXox-

Damon's blood tasted better than anything he remembered. In spite of his overwhelming hunger, Stefan drank in measured swallows. He knew that he'd make himself sick if he took too much at once. As soon as he felt that he was able to stand, he tried to push himself back to his feet. His brother had different ideas, though.

"I'm the one she hurt. It was my right. And watching her suffer wouldn't make me feel better."

Stefan shifted in Damon's arms. He wasn't at all sure how he felt about being carried by his brother.

"You can let me down, you know."

-xoXOXox-

Damon tightened his arms around his brother, not wanting to let him go.

"No. You're still weak and I… I want to take care of you. It's all my fault…"

He kissed his brother's forehead and rushed through the dark streets. Nobody would see them. At the hotel, it was more difficult, but Damon managed to get them inside without anyone the wiser.

Finally back in their room, Damon carefully lay Stefan down on the bed. Sitting down next to him, he took off the torn and bloody clothes, caressing the healing skin. Making sure that there wasn't any injury left, Damon nevertheless bit his wrist once more, offering it to his brother.

"You need it. In the morning, I'll buy some blood at the butchers. Now you're getting a hot bath. It will help you relax…"

-xoXOXox-

By the time they reached their hotel, Stefan's wounds were mostly healed. He accepted some more of Damon's blood anyway, let himself be undressed and steered towards the bathroom. There was dried blood on large areas on his skin, mixed with sweat and dirt and even traces of vervain.

Stefan sat on the toilet while hot water streamed into the bathtub. When Damon opened his mouth to speak, he lifted his hand.

"I don't want to talk about it. Besides, as you so eloquently explained to me, she wasn't your responsibility, right?"

It was as close as he'd let himself come to 'I told you so.'

-xoXOXox-

Looking down into the bathtub, Damon felt strange and realized after a while that he was ashamed. Because of him, his brother had got tortured for over two days. How could he ever make that right?

"I'm so sorry. I truly am."

He poured some bath supplements into the tub and a faint smell of lavender spread around the room. He wanted to pick up his brother, but Stefan went into the bath on his own. Not knowing what to do, Damon grabbed a sponge and started to clean his brother, rubbing soothingly over the blood-crusted parts. After a while, he deemed Stefan clean enough and grabbed some shampoo. He went to stand behind Stefan's head and lathered his soft hair, massaging the scalp in slow circles. Soon his massage spread down to Stefan's neck and shoulder and Damon tried to help him relax.

"Is there anything I can do to make you forgive me? I'll do anything, Stef."

-xoXOXox-

Almost against his own will, Stefan relaxed into those gentle touches. Although his body healed slower than that of other vampires, the pain was gone. At Damon's question, Stefan turned and warily regarded his brother. He couldn't tell whether the other vampire was serious. Sinking back into the hot water, he closed his eyes.

"Don't toy with me, Damon. Not now."

At the moment, all Stefan really wanted was to go to sleep. Briefly ducking under the water, he rinsed his hair.

"Let's go to bed. We can talk tomorrow, ok? Right now I really need to get some rest."

-xoXOXox-

Damon sighed quietly when Stefan's ears were under water. The guilt he felt was growing stronger and stronger. Trying to dampen it a little, Damon took a big fluffy towel and started to rub his brother dry, not allowing Stefan to do it himself.

"All right, brother…"

He gently ushered Stefan to bed and tucked him inside the soft blankets. Not knowing what else he could do to make his brother feel better Damon kissed him lightly, caressing his face.

"Do you really want to just sleep or do you want me to make you feel good? You know how talented I am with my mouth…"

-xoXOXox-

Stefan settled back between clean sheets with a sigh. Suddenly it occurred to him that he ought to be glad that he was alive. He looked up at his brother.

"Just sleep. But... maybe you could hold me? The way you did when we were kids?"

Even though he was angry with his brother, Stefan didn't really want to be alone just now. In spite of everything, he trusted Damon to keep him safe. Knowing that he'd just set himself up for a rebuff, he waited.

-xoXOXox-

By way of answering, Damon crawled under the sheets and gently hugged Stefan, pulling his brother's body flush against his chest. Even though they were now the same height, Stefan still fit perfectly into his arms, his face buried against his shoulder. He remembered with a sense of nostalgia how he'd held his brother after the death of their mother and during the stormy nights of their childhood.

Damon grew tired himself, the stress of the last three days getting to him. Slowly stroking the damp hair of Stefan's neck and his bare back, he pressed another kiss on his brother's forehead, glad to be able to do so.

"Sleep tight, little brother. I'll watch out for you."

When he had comforted Stefan in the past, he had always said those words. Damon slowly drifted off to sleep, for the first time in long years dreaming of their past.

-xoXOXox-

Waking up, Stefan didn't know where he was. For a moment, he felt nothing but panic. Then he realized that his brother's arms were around him. Safe. Damon wouldn't let anything happen to him.

Sighing softly, Stefan turned until he could press his nose against his brother's neck. After a while, he felt like he was being watched and lifted his head.

"Good morning. I've got to say, this is definitely an improvement from yesterday."

Then, on impulse, he added:

"Yesterday you asked if there was anything that you could do. I just... want what I've always wanted."

-xoXOXox-

Watching Stefan's relaxed face was a nice view to wake up to. Damon tightened the hold on his brother when he realized that he'd nearly lost him. He was unprepared for the onslaught of emotions that thought brought: grief, desperation, anger… Taking a deep breath, he tried to bury those emotions, but it didn't seem to work.

"I never quite understood what you want from me, Stef. Even when I try my best to please you, you always seem to want something else."

Damon looked into the green eyes of his brother, frowning. He was bothered by this, much more than he'd ever been before. He was desperate to get his brother's forgiveness.

"Just tell me what you want, Stef. I need you to forgive me. I'll do anything!"

-xoXOXox-

It didn't seem possible. How could Damon not know that all Stefan really wanted was for the two of them to be as they used to be. Frowning, he tried to put that wish into words:

"I want for the two of us to love each other. I want to be able to trust you. I hate it when you are cruel – to anyone. That's all, really."

It had never seemed like such a big thing to ask – after all, this had been the way everything had been for 16 years and Damon had seemed happy enough about it. Now, however, Stefan wondered whether he should have said anything. He probably sounded monumentally stupid.

-xoXOXox-

Hearing Stefan's quiet words, Damon felt something tighten in his chest. Was it shame or guilt? He couldn't tell. But he definitely felt uncomfortable hearing his brother's modest wish. Suddenly, he felt the need to fulfill it, to make his brother happy again.

"I'll try, Stefan, I'll try. I don't quite know how everything changed so much."

It was nothing but the truth. Frowning, Damon recalled their relationship as humans. He remembered the days at the lake when he taught his brother about touching himself. Steadily, all the memories and emotions got stronger and he felt overwhelmed. Distracting himself from the chaos in his mind, Damon began to kiss his brother, rolling over him to press his erection into Stefan's groin. At least this was familiar.

-xoXOXox-

"You will? Really?"

Stefan searched his brother's face, not sure whether he could believe this promise. But perhaps something good would come from these dreadful days after all. Then that skilled mouth descended on his and Stefan could do nothing but moan. He rolled over and pulled Damon on top of him.

"I ... I would like that."

Something wasn't quite right with his brother, but right now Stefan didn't care. All he could think of was how good this felt, in every way.

-xoXOXox-

Damon tried to ignore the inner turmoil by concentrating on Stefan's pleasure. His brother was still naked under the blankets and Damon took the opportunity to kiss down the muscular chest, taking care to pay special attention to the hardening nipples. First he sucked on one while his fingers caressed the other, then he switched places.

Traveling down to the bellybutton, he pushed his tongue inside, nibbling on the skin around it. By now, his brother was impatiently shifting under him and he felt the hard cock against his chest.

"I promised you my mouth, and so you shall receive…"

Breathing in his brother's musky scent Damon licked the hardness from tip to base. After a few strokes, he closed his mouth over the head, taking in as much as possible as he started to suck.

-xoXOXox-

Whimpering under Damon's ministrations, Stefan arched his back. He reached down and petted his brother's head encouragingly, running his fingers through those soft curls. Then all he could do was beg.

"Please, please, please ... got to have more! Need you...!"

Apparently, Stefan had lost all self-restraint, because within minutes he was ready to come. Frantic, he tugged at Damon's hair.

"Gonna come ... More?"

-xoXOXox-

His brother's pleadings stopped Damon and he went up again to kiss Stefan's mouth as he spread his legs. Fumbling to get some oil from the drawer, Damon slicked himself up and, after a fast preparation, pushed inside his brother.

"So tight, brother, so good."

Moaning, he grabbed Stefan's hips, bending forwards to trap his brother's erection between their stomachs. It didn't take long for Stefan to come. The way his brother tightened around his cock brought Damon over the edge as well and, screaming his brother's name, he thrust into him one last time.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan met each of Damon's thrusts, crying out as he did so. Still he kept watching that beautiful face from beneath lowered lids, searching for the truth – he was hoping again, he realized despairingly, even as his body was shaken by the first waves of orgasm.

Damon came mere moments later, panting something unintelligible. Then, incredibly, Stefan felt himself be gathered into his brother's arms. True, Damon had never been opposed to close contact even outside of sex but this was different: The other vampire was all but clinging to him. Hesitantly, Stefan started to caress Damon's back and shoulders.

-xoXOXox-

After coming down from the high, Damon was still feeling shaken up, the events of the last days still not processed. He hugged his brother tightly, not wanting to let go. With relief, he felt Stefan's hands caressing him and he slowly he drifted asleep.

The night was far from peaceful though, as Damon's mind conjured nightmare after nightmare. It started out with his brother dying during the torture, to flashbacks of the times when he had joined Katherine during her hunts, himself still being human. More than once, he woke up gasping for air. Luckily, his brother seemed to be too exhausted to wake up as well.

In the morning, Damon got up early, not able to sleep for much longer, and went to buy the promised animal blood, but not without leaving Stefan a note.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan woke up alone. Before he could panic, however, he spotted a note on the pillow next to him. Apparently, Damon had gone to buy ... pig's blood? Shaking his hand, Stefan reread the lines with something like awe. This was truly unheard of.

Finally, Damon returned and he was actually carrying a few bottles of blood. Stefan hurried to greet his brother with a kiss. He was probably smiling like an idiot.

"Here, let me take this. I'll eat later when you won't have to watch."

-xoXOXox-

Damon had to grin at Stefan's eager face and deepened the kiss. He tried not to think too much about the dreams of last night.

"Why, it doesn't bother me if you drink now. You need your strength, and surely you are hungry?"

He handed Stefan one bottle and put the rest away in the refrigerator. He had stopped for a quick drink on the way to the butcher, finding it enormously difficult to do so without feeling guilty. He had just taken a few gulps of blood, before he compelled the man.

"So what do you want to do on this fine day?"

-xoXOXox-

"Really? Well, to your health, then."

Stefan emptied the first bottle with a few greedy gulps and immediately reached for a second. God, he had been hungry. Once he was done, he licked bloody lips and smiled.

"That was good. Thank you. And since you asked, I'd like to get out of this godforsaken town. Why don't you take me somewhere fun? Somewhere warm, perhaps. We could go to Florida."

They needed that now, Stefan thought. Perhaps it'd help sustain Damon's new, friendly attitude for a bit longer. His brother had always liked to be amused.

-xoXOXox-

Damon was surprised by Stefan's proposal, but he thought, too, that a change of scenery would be good.

"All right, brother. We can take my plane in the afternoon."

Seeing Stefan's doubtful face, Damon laughed, touching Stefan's shoulder to calm him.

"Don't worry, it's a new one. It's a Cessna C-37, more secure and highly sophisticated. You'll love it, and maybe I can even teach you how to fly."

Damon proceeded to explain more about the characteristics of his plane, gesturing wildly to show the movements it could do.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan couldn't say that he was looking forward to the prospect of flying, but he thought he managed to keep most of his apprehension off his face. Damon's descriptions didn't help – just thinking about those loopings was enough to make him queasy.

"Just promise me that you'll be careful. No dangerous maneuvers, ok?"

They started packing right away and, since neither of them had brought a lot of luggage, they were ready to depart within the hour. No, Stefan wouldn't be sad at all to see the last of this city.

-xoXOXox-

Laughing happily, Damon started the plane after checking the maps. They would have to land one or two times to get fuel.

When they were in the air, Damon checked in with the air control and after reaching their assigned cruising altitude he looked over to his brother.

"I can't understand how you cannot love flying. Isn't it exhilarating to be able to leave the earth? For me, it's the greatest adventure of mankind. And imagine, they are right now working to fly as high as possible, even outside the atmosphere, maybe humans will even go to the moon in a few decades. And we will be there to witness it."

For Damon, it was the most positive part of immortality, to be able to see the increasing technical progress.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan shook his head, smiling even as his hands gripped the edge of his seat.

"I'm not exactly afraid of flying. I have reasonable reservations about something going wrong and me dying in a fiery crash. Please don't take this the wrong way, but this plane does seem like a rather flimsy contraption, considering that we are 3000 feet above the ground. I like technical innovations as much as anyone, but this seems a bit much."

Predictably, Damon laughed at that and launched into another monologue about the security measures on this kind of plane. Stefan only interrupted him to ask how long until they would be landing.

-xoXOXox-

"Oh, and we don't fly at 3000 ft, we're at 8000 ft. Since we're on the other side of America, it's about 2550 miles to Florida, it will take quite long. We have to stop about four times to get fuel, so I guess approximately 27 hours with fuel stops, if I don't sleep. Fortunately, your pilot is a vampire, so tomorrow evening we'll be at a sunny beach!"

Damon grinned and pulled out some maps to check for appropriate stops.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard Air Salvatore. Our flight today will have four brief stops: at Lake Havasu City, Roswell, Denton and Hattiesburg until we reach our destination, Palm Beach. Please refrain from smoking and fasten your seatbelts. The board service will start momentarily. Enjoy the journey!"

He pulled out a bottle of scotch and handed it to Stefan.

-xoXOXox-

That scotch was looking really good. Stefan opened the bottle and took a deep swallow. That helped. He kept drinking steadily through the next few hours and the flight passed in an almost agreeable manner.

Upon landing, Stefan was positively exhilarated. After a quick glance around, he leaned over and kissed Damon.

"Thank God, we're here. I can't wait to go to the beach. Do you remember that one time we went to Mexico?"

-xoXOXox-

Smiling softly at the memory Damon kissed his brother back.

"Yeah, the looks of the people when we just came out of nowhere with our luggage. It was funny - and the tequila was strong..."

Yawning, Damon took care of his plane, organizing everything at the small airfield just outside of Palm Beach.

"We better take a cab to some upscale hotel. I am quite tired."

-xoXOXox-

Since Damon had done all the flying, Stefan arranged for a cab and took care of the luggage. In spite of the long flight, he felt invigorated by the change of scenery - he was going to put the past week behind him, he decided.

At Damon's request, Stefan rented the most expensive set of rooms available. Once they were alone, he looked at his brother for approval.

"Is this all right with you? If not, we can try to find something better tomorrow, but you ought to rest now. You must be exhausted after those long hours of flying. Have you...," he trailed off, not knowing how to ask Damon whether he had fed. They never talked about these things.

-xoXOXox-

Looking around, Damon smiled approvingly, not able to hide his exhaustion. He didn't want to talk about feeding; in fact, he wanted to forget about this altogether. For once, he understood his brother's wish to go back to a time before all the supernatural stuff had happened.

"It's perfect here, very comfortable and luxurious. And don't worry about me, that's all taken care of."

It was a lie, but Damon didn't feel like looking for a human snack even though he was so hungry. He was worried that the nightmares would get stronger with the memories of a fresh feeding...

Stopping that train of thought, Damon took off his clothes, all but falling into the big bed, nearly asleep.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan smiled softly to himself as he looked at his brother. He still couldn't believe that everything was going so well. After pulling a blanket over Damon, he, too, undressed and got ready for bed, barely remembering to unpack before he did so.

Finally, Stefan curled around his brother, noting with a worried frown that the latter's sleep seemed a bit troubled. Trying to soothe Damon, he gently stroked his hair and cheek. Whatever could be wrong? After a while Stefan, too, fell asleep.

-xoXOXox-

Again, Damon woke up for a few times, shaken by his nightmares. He shivered, not wanting to remember, not wanting to think about the past. Each time he hugged his brother close and tried to get back to sleep.

The next morning they explored the sunny beach, enjoying the warm breeze and the murmuring of the waves.

Damon rented some beach chairs and they rested at the beach, drinking exotic fruit juices and watching people. Damon found it funny to make scathing remarks about them, especially about the older rich people without an ounce of taste.

"So what would you like to do? There must be some kind of amusements or pastimes…"

-xoXOXox-

Stefan wasn't quite sure what Damon would consider an amusement. He sipped at his drink to win time.

"Well, we could go and listen to some music. Or go to a party? Or I could amuse you ... privately."

To punctuate his words, Stefan rolled over, for the first time happy about the indecently tight swimming trunks that had recently come into fashion. He smiled happily, feeling Damon's eyes on his ass.

-xoXOXox-

Damon smirked and looked at Stefan's ass appreciatively.

"Sounds like a plan. Why don't we take a swim, no one should see what we're up to in the water…"

He stood up and jumped into the waves. By now it was later afternoon and not many people were around.

"Come on, brother, or are you afraid of a little water?"

-xoXOXox-

"What part of the word privately does he not understand..."

In spite of his misgivings, Stefan joined his brother in the water. Nobody seemed to be paying attention to them, and vampire compulsion could take care of anyone who noticed what they were doing. Then Damon's head disappeared beneath the waves.

"Damon? What are you...?"

Then he felt a touch on his leg.

"Oh."

-xoXOXox-

Under the water, Damon knelt down on the soft ground. A glance around showed that no one was near them and so he began to stroke his brother's legs, caressing them until he saw that the amazingly tight swimming trunks were getting tighter as Stefan's arousal grew.

Chuckling to himself, Damon pulled the trunks downwards, leaving them on one of Stefan's legs so they wouldn't float away. Not breathing was helpful for what he had in mind. Closing his mouth around his brother's cock, he began to suck it slowly, enjoying how his brother's taste was overpowering the saltwater. He grabbed Stefan's ass, fondling it as he pushed Stefan into his mouth.

-xoXOXox-

Soon it was a struggle to stay upright, to remain silent and feign nonchalance. Stefan shifted a bit, turned his head this way and that without seeing anything. Damon's mouth felt amazing, too good to resist.

All too soon, Stefan's knees buckled and he found himself neck-deep in the water. He reached down to grip Damon's hair, needing something to hold onto.

"Please ... please make me come. This is ... can't take this much longer. Can't hold back. People will notice."

-xoXOXox-

Even though underwater Damon could hear Stefan's moaned plea. Complying, he did his best and swallowed Stefan's erection while fondling his balls. It didn't take long at all until he felt his brother come.

Swallowing, he drew away and took care to pick up the swimming trunks, dressing his brother as he surfaced.

"Mhm, I liked this. Unfortunately, now you've got me all hot and bothered. Any idea how to reciprocate?"

-xoXOXox-

The moment he came, Stefan, too, ducked under water. Nobody heard his scream. He spluttered needlessly as he came back up but even now, nobody took any notice. It took Stefan a moment to calm down.

"Well, you know what they say: An eye for an eye. I'll return the favor. Besides, I want to see how well you manage to keep quiet..."

As good as his word, Stefan immediately dived under water and moved in to mouth at Damon's cock through the fabric.

-xoXOXox-

Groaning, Damon tried his best to keep standing when Stefan's mouth descended on his clothed erection. Impatiently, he pushed his hips forward while his hands held onto his brother's shoulders and head.

He bit on his lower lip as Stefan took his cock out and managed to keep the cry quiet when a hot mouth engulfed him. It was an exquisite pleasure to be blown like this, in the sea looking at the sun sinking into the horizon. He threw his head back as the pleasure grew stronger and stronger. It didn't take long until his fingers clutched Stefan's head and he pumped one, two more times, finally spilling his seed into his brother's mouth with a whimper.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan stayed down long enough to straighten his brother's clothes. He then swam a little away before resurfacing. Being underwater for this long still felt strange and he was glad to be able start breathing once more.

"Well, that was interesting, wouldn't you say?"

Grinning cheekily, Stefan walked past his brother through the surf. At the beach he grabbed some towels and threw one of them at Damon before starting to dry himself. Their illicit encounter had left him giddy, exuberant.

-xoXOXox-

With a surprised laugh, Damon caught the towel and sat besides his brother, enjoying the way the last rays of the sun warmed them. But then, a movement in the corner in his eyes made his head turn around. There were some people, looking like they had come from a reenactment of the 19th century, glaring at him.

"What? Who is that? Stefan, is there some kind of…"

When he turned back after looking over to his brother, there wasn't anything there. He frowned, but then shrugged it off.

"Never mind. So brother, do you want to go back to our hotel or maybe see a show or a musical?"

-xoXOXox-

They went to a dance that night, but although Stefan did his best to keep Damon happy, the latter seemed jumpy, distracted. The next few days passed in a similar manner. Stefan couldn't quite believe his luck: For all his strange moods, Damon was kind to him, obviously doing his best to please.

At night, Stefan often had to soothe his brother. Sometimes he was tempted to just ask what was going on, but if the past was any indication, that would be a sure way to ruin everything. So Stefan kept silent.

-xoXOXox-

Surely, he must be losing his mind, Damon thought. He'd tried to enjoy the last days, finally being together with his brother who seemed to trust him again. They had fun, but there was still something preventing his happiness.

Wherever he looked, people were glaring at him, shouting at him. Sometimes he heard them, sometimes not. In the beginning, he wanted to ask Stefan if he saw them too, but then he realized that everyone else saw them as normal people. Trying to ignore them was difficult. For everybody else they were normal passersby. Only when they were close to him they seemed to turn around and look into his eyes, accusing him.

They invaded his sleep, too, accusing him, shouting at him until he felt on fire, burning alive.

Of course, Damon wasn't stupid; he understood that they were figments of his imagination, probably produced by his reawakening conscience.

With the days passing by, it got harder and harder. One or two times Damon slipped up and shouted at them to shut up. Needless to say, the only thing that happened was that everybody looked at him in bewilderment, especially his brother.

-xoXOXox-

When Damon started shouting at random people in the street, Stefan didn't know what to do. He immediately got between his brother and the humans, who seemed ordinary enough and as surprised as he was.

"Damon? Why don't we go back to the hotel? You seem ...tense."

It was all very mysterious and suddenly Stefan felt scared. What if this was some kind of game he didn't yet understand?

"Damon? Do you hear me?"

-xoXOXox-

Stefan's voice broke the spell Damon felt he was under. Suddenly, the people were looking at him with surprise and annoyance, not with hate and accusation. Turning on his heel, he grabbed Stefan's wrist, pulling him back to the hotel.

"Forget it. I'm just tired and thought… thought someone was saying something."

It was downplaying things a little, but Damon didn't want his brother to think that he was going insane. Even if that was what Damon felt was happening. Back in the room, he tried to distract Stefan with kisses, caressing his face lovingly.

"Want to feel you inside of me again. Take me, brother."

-xoXOXox-

Glad to be able to do something, Stefan drew his brother into his arms and started to kiss his lips and neck. He'd accept Damon's easy explanation – any alternative would be too terrifying to contemplate.

"Mmh, that's just what I've been waiting to hear. Want to feel you around me, all strung out and desperate for more..."

Loving the little shudder his words evoked, Stefan started to unbutton Damon's shirt and rained light touches over every inch of newly exposed skin. He was trying hard to convince himself that everything was all right.

-xoXOXox-

As he had hoped, his brother's caresses were chasing away the visions and bad memories. Damon moaned and leaned into the soft touches. When Stefan had taken all his clothes off, Damon stumbled to the bed, impatiently opening his legs.

"Want you, Stef."

Nothing else needed to be said as Stefan jumped him, preparing him hastily. Groaning and whimpering Damon pushed onto those fingers, grabbing his own cock to stroke it lazily. When his brother finally entered him, Damon cried out softly and wrapped his legs around Stefan.

-xoXOXox-

It still felt like heaven to be able to touch Damon like this, quietly, without fear of rebuffs. Stefan took care to pleasure his brother, drawing from experience and his newly rebuilt trust in their relationship.

They fed from each other at some point and with some worry, Stefan noticed that Damon seemed very hungry. He didn't protest when the other vampire took more of his blood than usual and limited himself to a few quick swallows.

After cleaning up, Stefan curled himself protectively around Damon. If only he could figure out what was wrong.

-xoXOXox-

Damon rather liked being taken care of and he snuggled into the embrace. It did not, however, keep his nightmares from returning with a vengeance. He woke up several times, quickly drying the tears on his face.

Even though Damon tried hard in the following weeks, he couldn't stop seeing the visions, nor the people looking at him, screaming accusations. Whenever he and his brother went out of their room, they were there, distracting him from all their various activities.

Stefan didn't see those people in the way Damon saw them. He knew then, that he was losing his mind and tried to hide it from his brother. For the first time in decades, Damon felt afraid and alone, feeling the last hold on his control and sanity slipping away, while only wanting to make those visions stop.

-xoXOXox-

The more time passed, the more Stefan's feeling of worry intensified. He felt sure that doom was approaching quickly, but he couldn't fathom what direction it would take. He watched Damon anxiously, but there didn't seem to be any animosity in him.

Then, one evening after Stefan had gone to some park to feed, he returned to the hotel to find Damon changed. His brother seemed calm now, cold even.

"Damon?"

-xoXOXox-

One evening, Stefan went hunting and Damon tried to shut off his emotions again, hoping that then the visions would fade. For a minute, it seemed to work, but when his brother returned and when he asked with trepidation in his voice evident, Damon felt himself falter.

"It's nothing, Stefan."

Just those three cold words hurt him as much as the devastated look on Stefan's face and Damon realized that there was no escape. He crumbled down on the carpet and looked up with desperation.

"It's not working. Too much. Feel too much. And everywhere there are people shouting at me, screaming and insulting me. I want it to stop..."

-xoXOXox-

For a moment, Stefan looked at his brother in confusion. That cold dismissal had hurt, but nonetheless he immediately rushed to Damon's side when the latter all but collapsed.

"I don't understand. Who is insulting you? I really want to help you, but I don't know what to do..."

He helped Damon to the feet and guided him to the bedroom. There didn't seem to be anything else he could do, so he gently stroked the other vampire's back and shoulders. What was Damon talking about?

"I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. You know that, right?"

-xoXOXox-

Holding onto Stefan, Damon buried his face against that pale neck, trying to hide his tears.

"I'm losing it, Stef, I'm sure I'm going crazy. I see people accusing me, everywhere. They are in my dreams, in my life, outside of this room, just waiting for me to come out. And nobody else sees them."

He couldn't help his vampire face from appearing.

"I can't feed anymore, because I'm never sure whether what I see is real or not. I'm so hungry. These voices, can't someone tell them to shut the hell up?"

The last part he screamed, trying to ignore the sound of them in his head as he grabbed his ears, covering them in vain.

-xoXOXox-

Slowly, the picture started to become clearer. Damon obviously couldn't deal with something – his past sins, maybe- and now his mind was trying to find ways to release the pressure. Not knowing what else to do, Stefan kept caressing his brother until the latter's vampire face made him back off.

"Please, Damon, you need to calm down. You will be fine. Everything is going to be fine."

Stefan wasn't sure what was going to happen, but he certainly wasn't about to admit that out loud.

-xoXOXox-

Damon wanted to believe his brother, but deep inside he knew that it was for naught. Trying to keep his last hold on sanity was getting harder every day. He more often than not wished to shut off his emotions, but didn't quite know how.

That night he spent in the protective embrace of Stefan, who still couldn't keep the demons away.

It got steadily worse and Damon stayed inside their room most days, feeding from Stefan when they had sex. But then one night went by with no nightmare and Damon got hopeful that the worst was over. Telling his brother so, he agreed to go outside to the beach the next afternoon.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan did his best to distract Damon, to make him feel safe and loved, but he could tell that it wasn't enough. He wasn't enough. When his brother announced that he was better and wanted to go outside, Stefan was beyond relieved. Perhaps everything would be all right after all.

However, as soon as they were out in the streets, the hunted look returned to Damon's eyes. Stefan chattered nervously as they pushed on, doing his best to divert his brother's attention from whatever was going on in his head.

The beach was beautiful, peaceful even. Stefan happily took off his shoes to approach the water.

-xoXOXox-

The minute they were out of the room, Damon saw the visions again, louder and more aggressive than before. He felt as if they were going to attack him, but a glance in Stefan's direction showed that nothing like that was going on.

Dangerously close to the edge, Damon clenched his teeth, willing away the natural instinct to fight back as his fangs itched to lengthen. He would get past this. When they finally arrived at the beach, Damon sank down in the sun lounger. He relaxed minutely as he looked over the ocean, smelling the salt water.

Not far from them, a group of people were playing ball. Just when Damon felt more at ease, they approached them, obviously wanting to ask them to join in the game. But to Damon, they had stakes in the hands, shouting in anger, speaking about killing them both as revenge. He sprung up, jumping in front of his brother.

"No one is going to hurt my brother. First you'll have to kill me!"

-xoXOXox-

From one second to the next everything went to hell. At first, Stefan didn't perceive the two boys approaching them as a threat but suddenly Damon was on his feet, clearly on the verge of attack. Stefan immediately jumped to his feet and grabbed his brother's arm.

"Damon, stop! Nobody is hurting me! Those are harmless people!"

It didn't do any good. Damon broke free and even worse, his features slipped into their vampire form. They were in broad daylight. People were staring.

-xoXOXox-

Blood was rushing to his ears, drowning out all noises except the accusing and hurtful voices. Damon bared his fangs threateningly, but they didn't go away. He just wanted to make them stop and acted without any conscious thought, bringing them down, ripping their throats out. Other people came to attack and Damon retaliated. He didn't hear Stefan's words. Nothing else mattered.

Finally, all noise had stopped and Damon paused. He stood up and tried to see if there was any more danger, but everything was quiet. It was then that his eyes focused on his hands and he saw dark blood dripping from them. Hesitantly, he looked around and was appalled. Around him there were bodies, all dead, some even ripped apart. The sand was dark and slick with the blood.

Desperate, Damon looked for his brother who was standing behind him, looking at him with horror in his eyes. He fell to his knees, wishing for it all to stop. Something inside of him clicked back into place. Suddenly all the grief, guilt, desperation and all the other emotions vanished and he was free.

-xoXOXox-

Watching the bloodbath unfold with increasing horror, Stefan repeatedly threw himself at his brother in a futile attempt to stop him. Damon simply tossed him aside and carried on with his massacre. After the fourth such attempt, Stefan was injured badly enough to hurt and the people in the nearer vicinity were dead. Finally, Damon was still.

"Why...? Why did you do this? We were..."

Stefan was all but crying, fists clenching at his sides as he tried to maintain some measure of control. He met Damon's stare, looking for an answer.

-xoXOXox-

Feeling completely at ease now, Damon brushed his hands off on his trousers. Shrugging, he looked around and his only feeling a sense of relief that he didn't have to experience those intense emotions anymore.

"Apparently, emotions are as bad for me as human blood is for you, little brother. And for your information, I was only defending you. I thought that those people were attacking you. Well, is there anyone alive who witnessed this? I think some sort of compulsion is necessary."

There was one man running towards them, leading some police officers to the scene. Not particularly worried, Damon nevertheless decided to clean up. It wasn't too difficult to compel those four men into believing that a shark attack had happened. Smirking at the easiness of it all, Damon only then noticed that Stefan was hurt, too.

"Oh, I got you too? Well, take some of my blood then, those humans won't notice anything right now."

Biting in his wrist, he offered it to his brother.

-xoXOXox-

Taking a hasty step back, Stefan shook his head. The blood smelled appealing, but he was too sickened to eat – or rather, he didn't dare to.

"N-no. What happened to you, Damon? Don't you feel anything when you look at this ... this carnage?"

It was obvious that Damon didn't. Stefan's shoulders slumped as he realized that his brother had once more reverted to his cruel, cold personality. He stood frozen while Damon compelled the police officers. How had it come to this? Stumbling, Stefan turned. They had to get out of here.

-xoXOXox-

Damon frowned when his brother didn't take his blood, but then he licked his wrist clean, enjoying the faint taste of a dozen other blood types mixing together.

"Mhm. No, why should it bother me? Granted, it was a waste of blood, all of it seeping away into the sand."

He grabbed Stefan's arm and they left the scene, going back to the hotel.

"Ah, the quiet is really nice. No strange visions or vengeful ghosts."

He took off his soiled clothes and went to the bathroom naked. Turning around he asked his brother with a seductive grin:

"Won't you join me?"

-xoXOXox-

Damon was unbelievable. Legs giving out, Stefan sat on the bed. He, too, was dirty, but although he was desperate to get rid of the blood, he wouldn't even consider joining his brother in the bathroom. Again, Stefan shook his head.

Once he was alone, he took off his clothes and reached for a fresh pair of pants. Stefan wondered whether there was anything that he could do. Perhaps not everything was lost yet. After all, Damon had seemed like his old self mere hours ago. Perhaps he could still be reached.

Not wanting to be distracted by that naked body, Stefan quickly averted his eyes when his brother returned.

"Damon please, talk to me. I know that it's been difficult, but that's no reason to just give up. We could be happy together..."

-xoXOXox-

Damon turned around and regarded his brother through narrowed eyes. He folded his arms over his chest, not caring that he was still naked as he stared down on his Stefan.

"No. I won't go back to how I have been the last weeks. Maybe you didn't get it, Stefan, but I was going insane. I rather like being clear."

He approached Stefan, leaning down to lick the dried blood off Stefan's naked chest while his hands started to caress the strong muscles of his brother's back.

"Why do I have to change? I could demand the very same thing from you. Just stop bothering with those pesky emotions. Be at my side like you promised when you decided to make me turn. It's easy. We can truly be together for eternity. Just think about it. Don't you want us to be together?"

-xoXOXox-

Briefly closing his eyes, Stefan forced himself to stay perfectly still. Sickened as he was, he didn't feel like responding to his brother's advances.

"You asked what you could do. Your antics got me hurt – that's how this came about..."

He hadn't done anything wrong. He was sure he hadn't.

"So you'd rather I turned myself into a monster? That I end up hating myself?"

Of course, that was exactly what Damon wanted, and at the moment, Stefan was tempted to give in. He wouldn't be feeling this tired and repulsed if his emotions were switched off.

-xoXOXox-

When Stefan didn't react to his advances, Damon stood up abruptly, sighing impatiently.

"You always try to change me. Once again, little brother, you can't accept me as you have made me when you forced me to turn."

But then he didn't want to leave. Maybe, just maybe Stefan would see it his way for once. Damon crawled back into bed, his hands traveling over Stefan's naked body. He kept his touches soft and gentle, wanting his brother to give in.

"Yes, I would love for you to just stay by my side as you promised then. Why would you choose to feel so bad, when there's an alternative? I'll even help you control the blood lust. It doesn't have to be like this."

-xoXOXox-

Stefan laughed humorlessly. His head was spinning. Too much had happened in too short a time and he knew that he wasn't thinking straight, but...

"Would you now? So we'd be one happy family?"

Suddenly the temptation was overpowering. He wouldn't have to drink human blood, not much at least. Stefan squeezed his eyes shut. Not to feel anything. Not to have to go through this ordeal...

It happened almost without a conscious decision. When Stefan looked up again, his eyes were cold, devoid of any emotion.

"Wouldn't that just be fantastic?"

-xoXOXox-

A satisfied smile made its way on Damon's face. Finally, he got his wish. Thinking about all the delightful havoc they both could wreak together, Damon kissed Stefan with fervor, biting the soft lip to lap up the few blood drops seeping out.

"Yeah, that's more like it. Stef, you can't imagine how long I've waited for this."

There was no barrier between their naked bodies and Damon started to circle his hips against his brother's trapped cock.

"Want you like this, so much. Bite me, brother, fuck me, take whatever you want as a reward."

-xoXOXox-

Not giving himself time to think, Stefan let his face shift and sank his fangs into his brother's neck. The blood tasted amazing, like nothing he had ever had before, filling the emptiness inside of him.

"Nice. Now, about your other suggestion..."

Even in Stefan's current state the lust was still there. It went bone deep, sharp and impossible to deny. Already his hands were busy exploring Damon's body, roughly dragging their hips together.

-xoXOXox-

Damon could feel the difference immediately. Even when he let Stefan top, it had never been natural, not like the way his brother was behaving now. He could fell his cock growing with each rough touch, the bite still tingling as the wounds healed. Damon relished in the forceful way Stefan just took what he wanted and easily submitted to that.

"Whatever you want, Stef. Do you want to make me beg? Fuck me from behind on my hands and knees? Or should I ride you, pleasure you before you allow me to come?"

Whispering those suggestions into Stefan's ear, Damon bit it softly, pushing his hips upwards wantonly. He moaned deep in his throat whenever their erections brushed each other.

-xoXOXox-

Acting on instinct alone, Stefan growled and rolled both of them over, pinning Damon beneath him. The predator in him liked that.

"I want you to shut up. Think you can manage that?"

There was lotion on the bedside table and Stefan hurriedly slicked himself. He pushed his brother's legs apart, shifting until they were in the position he envisioned: Damon on his stomach, hips slightly raised, waiting for him. Without further ado, Stefan started to fuck his brother.

-xoXOXox-

The whimper Damon gave as his brother entered him was also due to the aggressive voice. He complied happily, wanting to hear more of those arousing commands. The force with which Stefan took him was so different from the other times when Damon had let his brother top.

As he pushed his ass back to get more of the wonderful friction, moaning and groaning like a whore, he contemplated how much better it would be when Stefan got as strong as him. Damon was harder than he could remember ever being and he got more desperate to come with each thrust.

"Damn, Stef, please touch me!"

-xoXOXox-

Finally, mercifully, even Stefan's mind shut down. He bit down on Damon's nape, keeping him steady. It felt ... not good, exactly. Overwhelming. Mind-numbing. Too much. Just before he came, Stefan even remembered to reach down and give his brother's cock a few jerks.

Afterwards, Stefan pulled out and rolled over. He was too antsy to stay still, though. He got up and looked for his clothes.

"Come on, let's go out. Why don't you show me a few of those little games you like so much? There might even be one of those clubs."

-xoXOXox-

The moment Stefan touched his erection Damon came, enjoying the dominating bite far too much. He knew that there would only ever be one person he allowed to take that role, and that was his brother.

Smirking at the way Stefan was vibrating with energy, Damon decided to ease Stefan into the way of his life. He got up too and dressed after cleaning himself up.

"Let's just go to a pole dancing and strip club. It's a good place to hone our compulsion skills. I'm sure yours will get better. And I always enjoy the little scenes I can cause…"

-xoXOXox-

Nodding in agreement, Stefan grabbed his coat. In the club, the two of them ordered drinks and proceeded to watch the show. The girls were pretty and they smelled tasty. Stefan smiled sharply. Surely, a taste wouldn't hurt. Leaning over, he whispered into Damon's ear.

"Why don't we get a few of those girls to accompany us somewhere more private? Somewhere we can really play?"

Downing a shot, Stefan gestured for a waitress, compelling her to take them backstage.

-xoXOXox-

Albeit appreciating the new, changed Stefan, Damon followed him with the memory of his earlier given promise. Was it even a promise? But he knew how Stefan could be when he gave into the bloodlust and he'd rather not have to deal with that.

In one of the rooms, Stefan was already waiting for him with three girls. Regarding their blank faces, they'd been compelled. Damon just hoped that it was strong enough.

"Stefan, I think it's important that you ease into the real blood drinking. Remember fifty years ago? I really don't want to have to take care of your messes again."

That being said, Damon commanded the girls to dance and strip for them while he pulled Stefan to a couch.

-xoXOXox-

"Well, nobody's asked you to," Stefan grumbled as he settled down and impatiently twisted out of his brother's grasp. He wouldn't be told what to do, least of all by Damon. It wasn't like his brother had any right to command him.

Turning his attention to the girls, Stefan promptly forgot all about the other vampire. He focused on a little blonde with skin so pale he could spot her veins shimmering blue beneath it. Her heart was beating fast, pumping her blood through her body.

Stefan licked his lips. He was hungry. Without his emotions, there wasn't enough of him left to keep the predator in him at bay, so he just gave up trying. It didn't seem to matter much one way or another. Tensing with anticipation, Stefan caught the girl's eye.

"Come here."

-xoXOXox-

Exhaling a deep breath, Damon let go of all his worries. After all, he finally had what he wanted and knew what to do to hold Stefan back. Smirking, he winked another girl over to him to give him a lap dance.

Damon watched out from the corner of his eyes as Stefan kissed the neck of the blonde, taking his time to savor the smell of blood until he finally bit her. Grinning with glee, Damon continued to watch as his brother fed, making all those delightful noises. Pushing his hard cock into the girl, Damon nevertheless waited for the right moment.

Just before the thin line of life and death was approaching, Damon gently pulled Stefan away from the blonde, kissing his bloody lips as means of distraction. He commanded one of the other girls to come over, grinding against Stefan's body while he did the same from behind.

-xoXOXox-

The blood was burning through Stefan's system, making his head spin. He bit Damon's lip viciously as he was kissed, wanting more of it. Then another girl was against him and Stefan wasn't at all averse to giving this one a fair chance either.

They moved together for a few minutes, drawing out the anticipation. With his eyes closed, Stefan could almost see himself ripping the girl's throat out. It wasn't what he wanted, he didn't think so, but right now, it was hard to tell.

-xoXOXox-

Damon could feel the shifting in the atmosphere of the room as his brother was rapidly losing control. Still he didn't want to have to deal with corpses. Thrusting against his brother's still-clothed ass Damon lifted the hand of the other girl, a pretty brunette, in front of Stefan. He bit the wrist swiftly and dragged the wound over his brother's lips.

When Stefan sank his fangs inside, Damon's hands went lower to rub the hard cock he found. Finally, Damon could let go of his own restraint and roughly pulled down both their trousers. He took Stefan just like that, not caring about preparation at all. They were vampires, they could take it.

Thrusting into the warming body was marvelous and Damon bent forwards to rest his head on Stefan's shoulder, watching the lips and teeth as he fed, the small slurping noises and the moans making his cock throb. With a glance, the last girl came forward and began to suck on his brother's cock.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan cried out as his body was suddenly invaded – not from pain, but from the way everything felt so much more intense than it used to. His body was going crazy and it was all Stefan could do to hang on. He groped wildly for something to hold onto and finally found a chair.

Eyes squeezed tightly shut, Stefan let his mind dissolve into chaos. He came in the girl's mouth with almost painful bursts. Somehow, Stefan managed to keep standing, to hold still until Damon was finished.

-xoXOXox-

Stefan's orgasm and the consequent clenching around his cock brought Damon over the edge as well. He sagged against his brother's back, caressing the quivering muscles of his stomach. After a few quiet minutes, Damon looked up and was relieved that the two girls were still alive. Feeling hungry himself, he grabbed the one that had sucked his brother and kissed her, tasting Stefan's cum as he bit into her tongue, drinking her blood.

When he was sated, he pulled away. Stefan, meanwhile,was lying on the couch, exhaustion apparent on his face. Quickly, Damon compelled the girls once again and they quietly dressed and left.

"That was fun, wasn't it, brother? How are you?"

-xoXOXox-

Humming softly to himself, Stefan listened into his body. The blood was working its changes, making him stronger, better. Damon was moving around, doing one thing or another with the girls, but he didn't care.

"Fine. I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Stefan lazily rolled over and, realizing that he was still naked, reached for his pants. That floor looked nasty. For a moment, Stefan wondered what he was even doing here. Then he stopped.

"What now? Back to the hotel, or what?"

-xoXOXox-

Grinning in delight, Damon was momentarily overwhelmed with the possibilities.

"You need new clothes, Stef. How about we raid a few shops?"

They dressed and drove to some of the more high scale clothing shops. It was no problem at all to disable the alarm system. Rummaging through the stacks, they carelessly threw the clothes around while trying some on. In the end, each of them had enough and, laughing, they went back to the hotel.

-xoXOXox-

The next days passed in a similar fashion. Stefan was constantly in motion, reveling in his new energy, always up until the early hours of the morning, always looking for new diversions.

Sometimes, Stefan wondered why none of the things he had enjoyed before seemed to hold any appeal now. Even his journal had been long discarded, gathering dust in some corner of their room. Perhaps some small, suppressed part of his mind was punishing him by denying him the solace of all the small, quiet activities he had used to love: books, soft touches, music. Now it was all feeding and fucking.

At some point, Stefan killed a man, partly because he got carried away, partly to spite Damon. He grinned at his brother, baring bloody teeth.

"Just to spare you from having to clean up my mess – why don't we move on? I saw a nice, new car outside – we could take it and just start driving. An adventure, right? Besides, I'm not getting back into that plane of yours."

-xoXOXox-

After the theater, Damon was too involved with his midnight snack in the small alley to notice that his brother took too much. Even though he was annoyed because Stefan did it deliberately and not because he was out of control, Damon shrugged it off. It wouldn't do to talk about it. Giving the girl the memory of a mugging gone wrong, he grabbed their money and took off after Stefan.

"Why not? I like your sense of adventure. It certainly took you a long time to develop it."

They jumped into the car and sped off alongside the beach, going north. Damon loved the fast new cars, coaxing his brother to drive faster.

-xoXOXox-

Grinning fiercely, Stefan floored the gas pedal. After all, a crash was highly unlikely to kill them and all he really wanted was to get as far away as possible – from what he did not know. He didn't even know where he was going.

"Yeah, well, it's there now. That's all that counts, right?"

For a while, they hurtled through the night in silence. Soon Stefan got bored.

"Should we pick up a hiker? I'm not really hungry, but it might be fun. Or you could give me a hand job. I'll manage to keep driving – I think."

-xoXOXox-

Damon admonished himself that he shouldn't be surprised at Stefan's behavior. His brother acted like a newborn and for all purposes, he was just that. Smirking at the proposal Damon leaned closer to nip at Stefan's ear.

"I can do way better than that. But you better not wreck the car; don't want to get dirty… except with you, that is."

Turning sideways, Damon managed to bend over his brother's lap and opened his trousers. Stefan was already half-hard when Damon blew on his erection, making it twitch. Taking the hardness out, he licked it slowly up and down as well as he could in the cramped position. Finally, he swallowed as much as he could.

-xoXOXox-

When Damon went down on him, Stefan swerved wildly across the road. It took a moment to wrestle the car back under control. He groaned harshly and reached down to grip his brother's hair.

"Damn, keep doing that. Love your mouth..."

Stefan didn't last long, which was probably a good thing, since his eyes kept sliding shut and even when they were open, he had trouble focusing. The pleasure was overwhelming, but it didn't last – it never did. He hadn't told Damon, but his moods kept fluctuating wildly, boredom, annoyance and wild enjoyment taking turns.

-xoXOXox-

Chuckling over the fact that the car was making dangerous swerves, Damon used all his skill to bring his brother over the edge. He swallowed the hot come, lapping everything up until Stefan was clean. Tucking him back into his trousers, Damon slowly sat up, inwardly thankful that he couldn't get a stiff neck.

They stopped in Jacksonville just at sunrise and Damon compelled their way into the most expensive hotel suite he could find. The following days were, in a way, exhausting for him, since Stefan demanded constant amusement. Damon tried his best to stop his brother from killing each meal, but he could see that Stefan was getting annoyed with him. Slowly but surely he started to miss the old Stefan, a fact he never would have believed and tried to bury deep inside. Of course, Damon also had a lot of fun during their decadent outings.

-xoXOXox-

A few weeks later, Stefan was resting on his stomach, swirling his fingertips through a small puddle of blood. The motel room they were in had been the scene of nothing less than full-scale debauchery only an hour earlier. Stefan cast a sideways glance at his brother.

Damon, too, was covered with blood. Looking at the room, one would think that somebody died in here, but actually, no one had. Again. Suddenly, Stefan knew what he wanted to do next.

"I think I'll leave tomorrow."

-xoXOXox-

After successfully managing to prevent some killings, Damon licked the blood off his hand. The girls and boys had been compelled and left to their own rooms. Damon felt ready to initiate round two when Stefan's words registered. A million different thoughts swarmed his mind as he tried to formulate an adequate response.

"Why… Alone?"

Damon inwardly cringed at his inarticulateness, but he was too surprised and even hurt to care much. Over the last weeks, he had felt more and more like their roles had been reversed and he had started to miss the old Stefan more and more.

-xoXOXox-

Looking up, Stefan raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. It's been fun and all, but now I want to be alone for a bit. I don't need you constantly breathing down my neck."

Noting the shock on Damon's face, Stefan smiled. He still didn't bother to get up from where he was sprawling.

"What? Did you think that switching off my emotions would make me want to stay with you?"

-xoXOXox-

Damon was hurt and, as always when he was hurt, he grew angry. Very angry. Standing up, he fetched his clothes and dressed quickly. That was not what he'd intended. Not at all.

Turning around to face his brother, Damon's voice grew louder.

"I hate you, brother. You promised, you promised as you took the choice from me that we would be together. Now while I could kind of tolerate it while you were a sissy, I can't believe you now. Fuck you, brother, fuck you!"

Completely enraged now, Damon grabbed Stefan and threw him through the room. What he hadn't expected was his brother being almost as strong as him now.

-xoXOXox-

At first, Stefan started laughing. It was ridiculous, the things that got Damon angry. He listened to the diatribe with detached amusement until he suddenly found himself flung across the room.

Snarling, Stefan came back up and instantly tackled Damon. His new strength helped, as did the fact that he was used to fighting with creatures that were considerably stronger than he was.

"Promises, Damon? You seriously want to talk to me about promises? Because I remember all the things you promised to me. That you'd always be there for me. That you'd always love me, protect me, be all the family I needed. And then ... misery. You really don't want to talk to me about promises – brother."

-xoXOXox-

Hearing his brother's answer made Damon see red.

They started to destroy the room as they fought with each other, hands tearing at the other's limbs, throwing each other through the room and slashing wounds in their bodies, which healed immediately.

After some minutes, Damon realized that they were nearly even in strength and he knew that this was it. If he didn't stop right now, they would kill each other. Damon didn't want to kill his brother though, not like this, not now. Not ever. Taking one look at his out of control brother, Damon knew that there was only one option.

Although he wasn't a coward, Damon threw Stefan once again against the wall and left as fast as he could. He was still faster than his brother was. In the distance, he heard the sirens of some police cars arriving. This time it wasn't his mess to solve.

-xoXOXox-

Once Damon was gone, Stefan laughed hollowly. He sat on the floor and waited for the police to arrive. He compelled the officers to let him go and not file a report. Then he, too, left. For the second time in a week, he left town in a stolen car with nothing but the clothes on his back.

The next weeks passed in a haze. Stefan let himself drift, did everything he felt like and never looked back. Until one night, Lexi ambushed him in his hotel room.

"What? What are you doing here?"

-xoXOXox-

After fleeing from his brother, or rather, the stranger he'd turned into, Damon went back to their hotel in Palm Beach. Luckily, nobody had checked them out and Damon packed his and his brother's things and left Florida with his plane. He was itching to read Stefan's diary and, after he'd landed in New Orleans and took a room in the Windsor Court Hotel, he did so. Once again, he felt clearly how much he missed the old Stefan. Surprised, he noticed that his emotions were in danger of coming back fully and he suppressed them harshly.

Keeping track of Stefan wasn't difficult. Each day there were news of vanished people and animal attacks in Florida. The death count was rising. Deeply emerged in his newspaper Damon didn't notice when a familiar woman approached.

"Damon Salvatore. The world is truly getting smaller each day."

Surprised, he looked up and saw Lexi. Uncomfortably, he greeted her, and during small talk an idea grew in his mind. Maybe she could help his brother. Making sure that they were in a very public place – the hotel lounge – and that sunlight wasn't too far from the place he was sitting, Damon hesitantly began to explain about Stefan. Lexi listened with a stony face, her eyes narrowing in anger.

"I'm sure that you can get through to him. The last time he went on a rampage he almost got himself killed."

Damon stood up and went to step into the sunlit place when he saw her nearly losing control. After Lexi seemed to calm down a little, Damon gave her Stefan's approximate location. He knew that she could only leave when it was dark, and so he placed Stefan's belongings, including his journal, at her door. It was the only way he could express how truly sorry he felt.

-xoXOXox-

When Lexi wordlessly stepped forward and pulled him into her arms, Stefan couldn't bring himself to fight her. After a moment, he relaxed into her embrace and that was all it took. He started telling her what had happened and slowly his walls started to crumble.

The next days were hell. Stefan had to wean himself away from human blood, had to face all the terrible things he had done and learn to live with them. Lexi stayed with him for as long as it took and for that alone, Stefan was beyond grateful. A few times Lexi tried to talk about Damon, but Stefan always stopped her. There wasn't any point, not after what had happened.

Only when Stefan was once more firmly in control of himself did the two of them leave.

-xoXOXox-

Unknown to either Lexi or Stefan, Damon had followed Lexi. Since he was sure that neither of them would contact him, he needed to know that his brother was still alive. After seeing them in a small vacation apartment, he could finally move on and shut off the last tendril of emotions he'd started to feel again. Not sure if Lexi had seen him, Damon left the small town they'd chosen to stay in and decided to go somewhere completely different.

.

TBC