Disclaimer: I freaking WISH i owned OUAT. Sadly..no.
Can I clear my conscious,
If I'm different than the rest?
Do I have to run and hide?
~Imagine Dragons
"No. No. Absolutely not. Just, no."
The wind pushes just a little more persistently. Killian scowls. "What part of 'no', do you not understand?"
Killian is the only one in the world can take the hints of sarcasm in a gust of wind.
He smoothes his hair back. "Fine. Fine, ok." He spreads his arms out. "Do your best."
Killian could almost swear the wind smirked at him.
...
"AH! WHAT IN THE BLOODY TARNATION?! I CAN DRESS MYSELF, THANK YOU VERY MUCH." The wind, currently pulling at his clothes, makes no reply. Killian scowls and turns his back to strip down.
Sufficiently naked, the wind pushes him into a sea-scented bubble bath. "Ow! My HAIR! Heavens above, woman, have you never bathed a man in your life? OUCH!" Killian pouts and rubs his thin hair, only reminding himself of the hair that used to be thick, dark, and very, very sexy.
Just for a moment, he thinks of who he used to be.
Tall. Broad, but lean. Thick, luscious hair. Head AND chest. Thick, sarcastic eyebrows. Perfectly proportioned body. A smile. Happy. No awkward feet. No broken fingers. No brittle teeth. No anger. No hate.
He is no longer Killian Jones.
So who is he?
Killian can't recall the last time he thought that way. It had always been, "Mask the change with anger, mask the change with sarcasm, innuendos, walls. Because change? Change is the truest form of fear.
YANK.
"WHAT, YOU INFERNAL WOMAN?!"
His wife's old handmaid starts to bow the bubbles away, an obvious signal for, "Hurry up."
He grabs a towel quickly and covers himself, and drags his body out of the bath.
...
"This is absolutely unacceptable. No. I may be a monster, but I still have my pride. And my pride still says NOO."
A pause.
"Yes. It really IS that bad."
Killian stares at his reflection in the mirror. His hair is permed, for Pete's sake! Piled upon his head like a giant hornet's nest. A terrible, terrible, giant hornet's nest.
Definitely NOT a lady magnet.
...
The finished product.
Is
in a word
disappointing.
His thin, light hair is brushed down, smoothed down to the point of silk. His hands are wrapped up in clean bandages, efficiently muffling the shaking. His leather over coat has been cast off, and replaced with a simple gray button down shirt, just drawing out his pale complexion.
The only remotely striking features he owns anymore are his eyes. Blue, different shades depending on his mood.
Right now they're an average blue, downcast in disappointment.
A gentle, almost maternal wind bushes across his cheek, then pushes the door open. Killian stares out that door, into the unknown.
Should I? No. Well, here I go.
He stalks resolutely out the door, marching up to Swan's door. He knocks loudly.
"Swan?"
"What?"
"What are you doing?"
"Reading."
"Are you coming down for dinner?"
"Have I ever?"
"No, but, I thought that maybe-"
The door opens, and a tousled looking Swan appeared in front of him. "Look," she says. "I really appreciate the thought, but I think it would be best for both of us if we didn't do dinner."
Killian clears his throat. "Why not? I think it only courteous that-"
"Courteous?" Swan scoffs. "What would you know about courtesy?"
He stiffens. This had been a bad idea. A VERY bad idea. "More than you, apparently," he says dryly.
Her eyes narrow, and she opens her mouth to say something, but he turns away and quickly walks down the hall, leaving her words unspoken.
Perhaps change isn't the truest form of fear after all.
Perhaps it's rejection.
A/N:
Hey guys! Busy night, babysitting my kid sister's birthday party.
12 year olds.
On a sugar high.
On the plus side, we all fangirled about CaptainSwan together.
#FangirlWithTheChildren
#IHaveNoLife
#Well
#I'llGetYouAStraw
#SoYouCanSuckItUp
Hugs and Kisses and Fears,
Mrs Killian Jones.
PS: You guys are the best :) I love you all individually, likes so much. You reviewers are fantastic and make my life! I feel like we're best friends (cuz I don't have any in real life haha). If you guys ever need ANYTHING, just PM me, or want something specific, you know. :) 3