Chapter Four

Your suggestions have been helpful and I have heeded to your comments. Bear with me. I know taking such lovable characters like Harry and Ginny and having them in a non-magic world is very estranged but please keep an open mind for a little longer.

As always, these characters do not belong to me.

Three days had passed since Harry's rebellious outing and by the third night Harry was trying to not pull his hair out. Harry, at that moment was sitting in the spare room on an exercise bike, his legs pedalling mechanically. It turned out his spare room was created into a small gym room for Ginny in off-season. Harry had only been in there late at nights, when Ginny had finished using it during the day. His bruises were fading to a dull yellow, even the one he copped on his shoulder from the drunkard. His cuts were painless thin lines that he was sure would fade without scarring but his appearance was the last thing on his mind.

Harry wasn't always the best decision maker and he accepted that no one was perfect, especially him but the remorse he was feeling went beyond any he experienced, even with Sirius. Harry kept seeing Ginny's last expression and his confusion from what it meant had him up late into the night without any answer. The only solution he was able to come up with was that being so close with her family, he maybe should have thought of them more like his own family. By going against her, he had effectively isolated himself from his own family. Yet, to him, it didn't quite match up.

The first day after the argument, Harry and Ginny barely spent time in the same room together. When they were, Ginny pretended Harry was part of the furniture but every so often he could feel her eyes flit to him. Harry simply could not look at her out of shame and guilt. The second day passed similarly but Ginny had left to go and get groceries for the pair of them. Harry was grateful she wasn't about to let him starve. By that night Harry tried three times to try and talk to her. He opened his mouth to apologise again for his betrayal but closed it soon after, the words suddenly eluding him. He would quickly dart out of the room when this occurred; bowing his head ashamed at how cowardly he was around her.

His thoughts, when he opted to distracting himself from Ginny, would travel to the Death Eaters and what their plans were. For all of those hours in thought, he ended up concluding he was just going in circles. The news on television would only give him past information or information that the Death Eaters wanted the public to see. The only reliable news would come from the Order, but his access to them were now limited. Not to mention their current problem of having to lay low because they were being hunted.

The higher ranking Death Eaters were methodical. Harry assumed it was out of fear of punishment from Riddle, who was so clean cut and clever it practically made him insane. The public's ignorance was also an advantage to the Death Eaters, who could now do anything without retribution. His frustration was making him agitated and he was disappointed when he finally entered the exercise room that night wanting a punching bag and finding there wasn't one.

The third day, Harry stayed shut up in his room, mellowing out his own frustration. He couldn't risk taking it out on Ginny when he had already blown her trust. Ginny did not try and contact him, nor offer him food when the morning slowly fell into afternoon. By late night he found himself in the exercise room again, after Ginny had gone to bed. He tried to work out his frustration by any means but found after an hour it wasn't going to work. His frustration wasn't only from the Death Eaters, but also in his inability to reconcile with Ginny.

Harry squinted as the fourth day of their silence dawn bright and clear. Harry rolled over to grab his glasses, wiping the sleep from his eyes as he did so. Whatever time he reached his bed he came to the resolution that today he would try to apologise again to Ginny. He put on a fresh shirt and shorts (he hadn't gotten around to washing his other clothes yet), tried to flatten his hair and walked out for breakfast. She was sitting at the table, drinking a coffee and reading the paper. He opened his mouth to apologise but once again lost his words and instead hurried to the coffee machine.

He ate his breakfast on the island bench, periodically gazing at Ginny from the corner of his eyes. She got up and placed her plate and empty cup in the sink. She was feet away from him; he could just murmur something, anything to her. He was left disappointed when he choked again. What on earth was wrong with him? Ginny was oblivious to his turmoil, walking down the hallway. Harry dropped his head onto the bench and covered it with his arms.

By lunch, Harry was about ready to strangle himself. He had purposely sat in the lounge room, threw on a movie he had no intention of watching and waited for Ginny to come out. After the first movie had ended, she was still in her room. Harry put on a second one and was halfway through before he fell asleep again on the couch. He woke with a start as the player beeped at him, indicating the movie was over. He cursed silently. He felt around for his glasses that must have slipped off. He eventually found them on the side table near where his head was. There was no way they could have gotten there unless someone …

It was then that he heard Arnold barking from the backyard. The glass doors were opened and the breeze rippled through the ends of the curtains, ruffling Harry's hair. Harry got up and walked slowly outside. Harry had hoped that by Ginny placing his glasses on the table to avoid them breaking, that she may have forgiven him. It was a small thing to place his hopes on, but right now his only other option was a confidence that had evaded him for the past three days.

Ginny was playing with Arnold. She was kicking a ball for him to fetch and roll back to her. He was barking happily as she kicked the ball further and further away. He ended up having to race it before it hit the back fence and rolled off in another direction. Ginny laughed when his enthusiasm had him running past the ball and having to skid to a stop before finally catching it. Arnold wagged his tail happily at Ginny's laughter and praise, panting heavily but always wanting another turn.

Harry watched them from a porch chair in the shadows, frowning. His life for the past four years had been so focused on capturing and securing Death Eaters that he had never stopped to think about the things he was missing out on. Sure he smiled and occasionally laughed but he had forgotten about the crazy, spontaneous times he used to have that were just for the sake of it being fun and edgy. He would do things now out of necessity, never because it was what he wanted.

'Well, come on then,' Ginny said.

Harry had been staring off into space but he focused on Ginny after she spoke. She was looking at Arnold, who was tugging on the ball, growling. Harry stared at her, noticing the red in her hair brighten under the sunlight. It mesmerised him slightly, taking him back to the way her hair flew behind her like flames when he used to watch her school football games. She managed to get the ball away from Arnold and gave the dog a fond smile. It was after that she met Harry's eyes for the first time in four days. She was still smiling, although Harry thought it fell the tiniest bit. Harry should look away in case he angered her but he found he wanted to keep looking at her.

'Are you going to join in or what?' Ginny asked, gazing directly at him this time. She raised her eyebrow in question.

Harry clenched his hands nervously and got to his feet. He shuffled down the steps and onto the backyard, wringing his hands together. His heart was pounding loudly in his chest as though he was facing his executioner. Ginny threw the ball at him and he blushed when he fumbled it, nearly dropping it. She smiled softly as Arnold raced over and started jumping on Harry. Harry stared at the ball he was turning over and over in his hands. He threw the ball for something to do and Arnold ran off to fetch it.

'Ginny, I …' Harry began. She was watching Arnold but looked back to him. He took a deep breath. 'I'm sorry about the other night. I –.'

Ginny cut him off by holding up her hand. 'Harry, I understand why you went, sort of. You are a headstrong, practical person. Someone telling you that you had to stay in hiding was like saying you weren't allowed to walk anymore. I knew it was going to be rough on you. I didn't expect you to get that restless so quickly.' Harry shuffled guiltily. Ginny shrugged. 'The point is, Harry, what you did is just who you are and you can't help that.'

'I can though,' Harry whispered. 'I made the wrong decision,' he said louder.

'I can't deny that,' Ginny said with a wry grin. 'I may have been a little over zealous with my anger.' Arnold trotted back with the ball, highly satisfied.

'Your anger at me was justified,' Harry grunted with an anxious smile of his own.

'Is that why you were avoiding me? Are you scared of me?' Ginny was smirking now.

''Course not,' Harry cried indignantly. He felt his face grow hot.

'Let's see then.' Ginny walked past him, up onto the porch.

She kicked out a soccer ball, which Harry trapped with his foot. He gazed down at it, back to her and then to Arnold who was watching keenly. Ginny leapt back down the stairs, her eyes bright.

'One on one. To score, get past the other and hit the fence,' Ginny indicated to the bare section of fence between two small bushes.

'I haven't played in a while,' Harry mumbled.

'I will let you get reacquainted while I make a couple of phone calls,' Ginny said light-heartedly.

Harry watched her skip lightly back into the house. He looked down at the ball between his feet. He rolled it under his foot, closing his eyes at the familiarity. He walked and dribbled it, increasing his walk to a light jog in a matter of seconds. He juggled it between his feet before kicking it at the fence. It bounced off with a resounding thud and came straight back.

Arnold barked with excitement and Harry wanted to join him. His blood was pumping from his exertion. He continued to pass the ball to the fence, juggle it and then pass it again. Harry was back in his high school years, preparing for a big game. Now he was at the big game, the adrenaline forming from his nerves as he dribbled up and down the pitch, getting past opposition and on his way to score. The keeper the last opponent to beat …

'I see you caught up, fast.'

Ginny was leaning against one of the posts, watching him, pleased. Harry looked away sheepishly, the ball rolling under his feet.

'Must be like riding a bike?' Harry suggested.

'Come on, superstar. Let's see how much you really picked up.' Ginny ran down the steps, stopping beside him and the soccer ball.

'Hold up, who's going to be the umpire?' Harry asked suspiciously.

'Arnold,' Ginny answered simply.

'You want a dog to referee a football match?' Harry couldn't keep the scepticism out of his voice.

'He knows what he's doing,' Ginny stated as if that was obvious. 'He will bark when there's a foul and wag his tail if he's okay with it.'

Harry shook his head. 'Okay. We'll see how this goes.'

Their game began. Harry struggled to defend at first, forgetting little things such as body positioning and tackling manoeuvres. He slipped over and Ginny scored the first goal. She tried to be modest but her grin cancelled the decorum. Harry picked himself up, brushing off stray grass. Ginny kicked the ball to him and it was his turn to attack. If he thought he was rusty at defending, he certainly wasn't at attacking. His feet seemed to have remembered faster than his brain did and before his very eyes, he had gotten past Ginny and scored a goal of his own.

'Not bad,' Ginny said appreciatively, though Harry detected a hint of bitterness in her voice. Harry grinned and shrugged, passing her the ball to continue their battle.

And a battle is what it became as the two of them did whatever they could to prevent the other scoring. Arnold watched patiently from his position on the porch, ears perked and ready to call out any misdoings. A few minutes later no one had scored and the competitive sides of both of them were starting to gleam. Ginny managed to worm around Harry's defence and dribbled it closer to the fence. Out of desperation, Harry slide tackled from the side. He kicked the ball out of Ginny's possession and smirking, he got to his feet. Arnold growled indignantly at him, calling it a foul. Harry stared at the dog in disbelief. He shrugged at the call and let it go. Ginny was smiling mysteriously as she got the ball back for another chance to attack.

Ginny scored another goal after that but Harry beaten her twice, effectively putting him in the lead as the sun began to set. Harry's muscles were singing from the exercise. He had forgotten the difference between running for your life and simply running leisurely for a game. He could feel a new enthusiasm bringing its own sort of power back into his body. He was going to win this game, he knew it. As Ginny went to go past him, he slid to intercept the ball. She leapt over him at the last minute which was around the time Arnold growled for the second time.

'What? I didn't touch her!' Harry told the dog. Arnold barked angrily in response. Harry glared at Ginny who was staring at him, mystified. Harry reluctantly gave her the ball back, narrowing his eyes at her expression.

Harry streaked past Ginny a few rounds later and was going to score until his legs were taken out from underneath him. He landed with a thud to the ground, half on top of Ginny's legs and the rest eating the dirt. He rolled off of her and to his feet, looking at the dog for the foul call.

'Aw, come on. That has to be a foul?' When the dog did nothing, Harry's suspicions were starting to mount. He rounded on Ginny who was smirking.

'Can't you hack it, Potter?' she asked innocently.

'Just kick the ball,' Harry growled, fixing his glasses.

Ginny levelled the score with a spectacular feint and Harry was fuming. He had one final play left before the sun set and he remembered one move he practised for months before he had quit football. He slipped the ball through Ginny's legs, racing around to retrieve it. She got back to defend but hadn't realised he had intended for her to do that. She fell for his ruse as he skilfully danced around her again. This time the goal was all his. In desperation, Ginny lashed out and tripped him from behind. Only his heightened reflexes from Order training kept him from falling face first. He landed on his shoulder and rolled to a crouch as the ball was taken by Ginny who scored. Arnold remained quiet. That was Harry's last nerve.

'You've got to be kidding me?' Harry exclaimed at the dog, realising how stupid he must have looked yelling at a dog but dismissing it. 'That was a blatant foul!'

Harry rounded on Ginny, who was trying desperately to keep the smile from her face. Ignoring her smug look, he rounded back on the dog.

'So, it was a fine tackle?'

Arnold wagged his tail.

'And mine earlier was bad?'

Arnold barked in acceptance but instead of watching Harry, his attention was behind Harry's shoulder. Harry nodded in acceptance, his suspicions of tampering getting confirmed. He pretended to consider the dog, waiting for the right moment to catch her out.

'And your owner did nothing to change your decision?'

Harry turned halfway through talking, to see Ginny gesturing at Arnold to wag his tail. She stopped and placed her arms behind her back quickly, her expression of mock surprise. Harry raised his eyebrows, arms crossed in consternation. She slowly brought her hands around and placed them in front of her in a placating gesture.

She smiled nonchalantly at him. 'Really, if you think about it … I am the one who feeds him.'

'Cheater!' Harry yelled at her.

Ginny squealed with laughter and took off as Harry chased her. They ran around the yard, Ginny dodging and weaving through the plants, laughing raucously at him. Harry found he was laughing too, in between cursing her with empty threats. He eventually caught her in the middle of the yard. He picked her up and she shrieked as he tackled her into the ground. Ginny tried to escape his grasp but he didn't relent. He swatted her gently, all the while still playfully cursing her. It was at that point that Arnold jumped into the fray, biting the end of Harry's shorts. Harry yelled indignantly, his attention divided. Ginny used this to her advantage and tackled him instead. Harry placed his hands up in surrender after Ginny pinned him to the ground.

Ginny gazed down at him from her position on his torso, Arnold at her side. In this light, Harry saw the freckles splashed across her nose and cheeks. He was gazing at her now, smiling and as much out of breath as she was.

'I give,' he told her. 'But just admit you can't beat me without cheating.'

Ginny rolled her eyes, looking at Arnold. She nodded her head to Harry. 'Can you believe him? Reckons we were cheating.'

Arnold and Ginny looked back at him and Arnold growled. Harry laughed and Arnold stopped growling and sat down, relaxed and wagging his tail. Ginny slid off and sat beside Harry on the grass and he straightened to join her. He looked out at the surrounding bushland and watched the setting sun.

He was suddenly able to remember the school days with Ron and Hermione. The times when all he worried about was making sure the two of them didn't kill each other. He remembered the adventures the three of them had throughout the school that ended in one or all of them getting caught. Ron was the first to mimic Hermione or say something sarcastic in return to her stares or statements. Harry didn't think there wasn't a day when he wasn't smiling or laughing with the two of them.

He felt an enormous weight being lifted off of his shoulders as his body calmed down. He breathed out and suddenly the landscape seemed to burst into colour around him as they sat there. It was as though he had wiped the canvas of its blemishes and he could finally see the final image. She had changed him somehow. Ginny had made him see in colour again. He turned to her after making that discovery, to find she was already staring at him, a knowing smile on her face.

'What?' Harry asked when she continued to stare at him.

'I haven't seen you smile like that since high school,' she said in wonder. She spoke softly although she might as well as yelled at him.

He gaped at her, unable to reply. All the reasons for why they were there and what Harry had to do infiltrated his mind, erasing any joy or laughter Harry had just felt. The image of Sirius' shooting came to his mind. It shifted to their headmaster crumpled on the school grounds; the friends; the Order's family members; children; innocent bystanders. Harry pictured the destruction, followed by the Death Eaters joyous faces and cries. Tom Riddle's glaring face as he attacked Harry again and again. Harry having to fight and escape; his life in the balance …

'Harry …' Ginny said tentatively, observing his reaction.

'I … I should get back inside,' Harry said quietly. Tom Riddle's eyes were etched in his mind.

'Harry …' Ginny said, a mixture of shock and confusion.

'Thanks for the game,' Harry said hurriedly, leaving her sitting alone in the backyard. He got to the living room and stopped, his mind racing.

'Harry?' Ginny repeated. She had followed him inside.

He faced her, and judging by her appearance she had just as many questions as he did but at that moment, the phone rang. She glanced to the phone then back to him, looking helpless. She brushed past him, grabbing his sleeve briefly. She reached the phone, read the caller, her eyes widening.

'It's Ron,' Ginny said urgently.

Harry strode forward, his thoughts dissipating. Ginny placed the phone on the table and placed it on speaker. Ron's harried voice immediately broke the silence.

'Are you guys alright?' Ron asked strained.

'Of course we are,' Harry said impatiently. 'Tell us –.'

'What the hell happened then?' Ron shouted at them.

Harry and Ginny stared at each other. Judging by her expression, she was just as puzzled as he was.

'Ron, what –,' Ginny began but Ron cut her off to.

'We've tried to call you four times already! We were starting to get really worried something had happened to you!'

'We were outside,' Harry tried to explain but Ron cut him off with a derisive noise.

'Harry, I would never have expected you to be so careless. Ginny I would understand you to not know our ways but you … Quiet, Hermione!'

'Ron, you have no right to talk to Harry like that,' Ginny snapped. 'It was a bit of harmless fun.'

'Harmless fun,' Ron repeated scathingly. 'Well, while you are having fun we've had three more disappearances, several fires to places connected with the Order and an entire family has been murdered!'

'An entire family,' Harry whispered in shock.

'Yes. The youngest was eight years old.'

Harry's insides froze. This shouldn't be happening. The Death Eaters weren't that brutal or sadistic, this had to be a nightmare. A nightmare Harry wasn't waking up from. His whole body shuddered and Tom Riddle's cold eyes pierced his once more. He was almost smirking at Harry, daring Harry to find him and stop him. Harry's ears were ringing with a high pitched sound but he could still manage to hear Ron and Ginny's argument distantly.

'What do you expect him to do about that, Ron? He is here, trying to cope with the fact he was told to leave it to you guys while he has to sit around twiddling his thumbs!'

'He can try and think of places where Death Eaters might be and where they have been,' Ron retorted.

'And then what? We agreed that you would contact us. We have no way of contacting you so if it did seem important then he would have to wait for you anyway.'

'He knows how to get to us if it's important,' Ron snapped, though he was hesitant.

'Oh really, Ron?' Ginny asked sarcastically. 'What is it, smoke signals? Morse code? We really are upset about this, we are, but at the moment you are on your own until I can meet up with you when I am on training camp.'

'You aren't serious?' Ron asked incredulity.

'Yes, Ron, I am. Harry said I would be off of their radar if my routine was as normal as possible. And I was thinking maybe I could get some inside information in the process.'

'That's too risky,' Ron said immediately. 'Ginny, I won't allow it.'

'Oh, really Ron,' Ginny replied scathingly. 'I will do what I want and …'

Harry had heard enough. He was walking in the direction he was facing, just wanting to get away. He realised he was halfway down the hallway until a hand gently grabbed his arm.

'Harry, what're you …' Ginny slowly came into focus, her eyes furrowed.

'Ron …' Harry trailed off croakily.

'I told him to rethink his attitude and hung up,' Ginny said dismissively. 'Harry are you … oh,'

Harry's legs gave out and he fell into the wall. Ginny rushed forward to hold him steady.

'You're shaking,' Ginny observed. 'Come on.'

Ginny ushered him back out onto the couch, sitting down beside him. Harry gazed at his hands in wonder. They were indeed shaking. Harry had never thought shock would affect him again after Sirius; he had taken certain measures to make sure he would never experience it again. The high pitched ringing in his ears was dimming, though not entirely disappearing.

It was the family's murder, topped with his guilt that was the trigger. He must have overloaded his emotional capacity and it sent his body into shock. He closed his eyes, taking deep breaths through his nose, willing his body to calm down.

'Ron's right,' Harry muttered dejectedly after a while. 'I should've been preparing for something like this.'

'Harry, it's only been a week since your attack,' Ginny said stunned. 'No one would expect them to move this fast.'

'I keep screwing things up,' Harry continued, not listening to her comment. 'First I went out to pry and now not being at the phone …' Harry shook his head.

'Harry …' Ginny whispered. She gently turned his face so he was staring at her. 'You are too hard on yourself. What could you have done for those people, or that family?' Harry remained silent. He pulled his face away, staring at his hands. 'Exactly. You would have not been able to do anything. Ron was being a prat because we scared him.'

'But they want me,' Harry tried to convey to her. 'Maybe if I hand myself in or let them get a glimpse of me –.'

'Don't you dare,' Ginny said sternly. 'You are the reason they haven't come out and declared their intentions yet. This skulduggery and gang-like violence is them wanting you to feel guilty enough into thinking you should hand yourself in. They are just as afraid of you.'

'But why?' Harry asked hopelessly. 'I don't understand –.'

'Because you can get people to listen. To make people see the truth from the lies. You can be a symbol, Harry. You can be a rallying point for all of those who feel repressed. Let the Order spread the word and stay here. And by staying here, it doesn't mean you have to be miserable, like Ron thinks. When have you ever just lived a little? Smiled? Laughed or just generally had a good time?'

'Ginny, we're in a war,' Harry stated as if she was stupid.

'All the more reason to have these moments while you still can,' Ginny said kindly, not taking offensive.

Harry looked to the girl beside him, not daring himself to hope. Her eyes bored into his, etching themselves onto his very brain. The dim light softened the panes of her face and almost made her hair appear to emit its own sort of light; like a personal halo. He would remember this moment, her confidence and her determination to make him see her point of view. One word came to Harry's mind when he stared at her and it was that which frightened him; beautiful. Ginny Weasley was beautiful.

Harry gave her a small thoughtful smile. He grabbed her hand briefly in thanks and then left her on the couch before he thought of anything else concerning her. She had made him smile, made him laugh again and maybe by doing that she had somehow changed her persona in Harry's mind. She was Ron's sister, which in itself was off limits and yet when Harry devised scenarios in which he told her she would have to leave him alone, there was an ache that was close to a panic attack.

Harry took a cold shower, ignoring his hunger. It turned out Ginny had cooked them pasta and he had no choice but to eat with her. He kept his eyes averted and Ginny let him remain silent. What if what he was feeling only was sisterly affection for her? Hadn't the past few days been about family and where he stood with them? His guilt was from betraying the only family he had really known and maybe this was an aftereffect from the guilt. He hadn't felt that particular type of guilt so he didn't know what recuperations occurred. Harry spent the rest of the night convincing his brain his new estranged feelings for Ginny was only family affection; without much avail.