A/N: Hey everyone *waves* thank you everyone so much for leaving a review you guys are once again amazing I would also like to say hi *waves* to all my new followers. You know when I first started writing this I never thought it would go anywhere so, I thank you guys for making this fic officially my longest one. Ok….so on to the fic.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
*At the hospital*
Rachel burst through the hospital doors with Santana by her side she couldn't believe this was happening Finn was in an accident and no one knew what was going on. She and Santana are greeted by Puck who has a bandage on his around his head.
"How is he?" Rachel asks Puck in a panic.
"I don't know they won't tell me. Rachel I am so sorry." He tells her as he pulls her into a hug.
"Puck it wasn't your fault." Rachel tells him.
"I know it's just if I hadn't called him to come get me he wouldn't be here." She could tell that Puck was pretty messed up about this but…this wasn't the time to put the blame on anyone. All she wanted to know was if Finn was going to be ok. Rachel takes a seat next to Santana who looks just as worried as she does.
"You ok Santana?" Rachel asks.
"I just really hate hospitals." She lied of course she wasn't ok first she finds out that she is pregnant and now Finn is in the hospital. As much as she didn't want to admit it she felt really bad for Rachel. She and Finn were finally getting the second chance that they so deserved and it killed her to think that they won't "Screw this." Santana grabs Rachel by the arm.
"What the hell?" Rachel exclaims as Santana pulls her up.
"You want to know how he is doing right." Santana asks.
"Well…yeah but we can't just go in there." She tells her.
"Follow me." Santana says as she takes her to the nurse's station. "Look, my friend here has been waiting a long time to find out how her husband is doing and no one seems to have any answers. So you think you could find someone around here who can tell her how her husband is." Santana tells the woman who is looking at the computer.
"Ok, calm down sweetie what is your friend's husband's name?" the woman asks.
"Finn Hudson." Santana tells the nurse.
"Give me one minute and I will get the doctor for you." the nurse tells them as they go back to where they were sitting.
I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you
It seemed like forever since the nurse said she was going to get the doctor. Rachel was going crazy thinking of every worse case scenario she could come up with.
"What the hell is taking them so long?" Rachel says in frustration all she wanted to do was to hold him. Rachel's eyes brighten up when she see the doctor come out of the operating room. "How is he?" Rachel with Santana and Puck on each side of her.
"I assume you are here for Mr. Hudson?" The doctor asked as the three teens nodded their heads. "I am Dr. Murphy which one of you is Rachel Hudson?" This was the worst part of his job telling the family about their loved ones.
"I am." Rachel speaks up.
"Ok…We got the bleeding to stop but he is not out of the woods." He saw the young woman's face go from hope to horror in a matter of seconds. He hated being the bearer of bad news.
"What do you mean he is not out of the woods? I thought you guys got the bleeding to stop?" Santana asks with confusion.
"Finn has a substantial amount of damage to his spinal cord." The doctor tells them as Rachel covers her mouth in shock.
"What do you mean substantial amount?" Rachel asks she could not believe what she was hearing.
"The impact of the crash compacted his spinal cord which could only be temporary we will not know anything until he is awake." the doctor continues to explain while Rachel just stands there in shock. Finn could be paralyzed.
"Can we see him?" Santana asks.
"He is heavily sedated at the moment so only one person in the room." The doctor tells them.
"Go ahead; we'll give Kurt a call." Puck tells Rachel as she nods.
XXXX
Rachel is standing in front of Finn's room well…it wasn't his room at least that was what she kept telling herself. She couldn't believe this was happening to Finn of all people did not deserve this. He has so much going for him why did this have to happen? Rachel places her hand on the door and slowly opens it. She was not expecting the scene in front of her. There he was bandages covering his wounds; his face was covered in small scratches and angry purple blotches. He had so many different tubes and lines coming out of him. She walked over to his bed and grabbed his hand. "Hey it's me." She tells him kissing his hand and letting the tears fall from her face. She'd give anything to take his place she laid her head against his chest and closed her eyes hoping that this was all a dream and that they would wake up in her apartment.
Nationals New York.
I had just got done telling Finn why we could not be together, which was probably a huge mistake but…I knew that we could not be together. I hear them announce New Directions I look over at Finn who gives me a smile as I take a deep breath as I take my cue. As I begin the song I know this is going to be the hardest performance I have ever done. Not because it's nationals but because of the deeper meaning of the song.
Face to face and heart to heart
We're so close yet so far apart
I close my eyes I look away
That's just because I'm not okay
But I hold on I stay strong
Wondering if we still belong
I take a few steps out on to the stage never taking my eyes off him. I had never felt more exposed than in this very moment. Him looking at me like he is looking into my soul and he can see my fears. As we move closer I find it hard to keep my composure. Cause I want nothing more than to run into his arms and tell him I am a fool and that I love him.
Will we ever say the words we're feeling
Deep down underneath it
Tear down all the walls
Will we ever have a happy ending
Or will we forever only be pretending
We will always be pretending
I find myself getting lost in the words and his voice. It's like we are the only ones in the room and nothing else matters. Every step I take towards me pushes me closer and closer to the edge. I know in my heart that I can't stay away anymore. There we are standing there face to face as the song ends. I can see the love he has for me in his eyes and it is in that moment as our faces move closer and closer until they touch that I know that we are meant to be and nothing is going to stop us.
XXXX
Just a small town girl
Livin' in a lonely world
she took the midnight train goin' anywhere
I stand here and listen to the awkward boy who happens to be the star quarterback of the football team and I am in awe…of how confident he is on the stage.
Just a city boy
Born and raised in South Detroit
He took the midnight train goin' anywhere
I almost forget my cue because I am hypnotized by his voice. There is so much soul and emotion in his voice. I take a step forward and begin my part never taking my eyes off of him.
A singer in a Smokey room
I take his hand in mine as we continue to sing the song. He grabs my hand and smiles a smile that has melted my heart.
The smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
it goes on and on and on and on
We continue the song like we are the only two people in the room.
"Rachel wakes up." I hear someone say. I slowly open my eyes taking in my surroundings.
"Where am I?" I ask and then it dawns on me.
"The doctor needs to run some tests on Finn." Puck tells me.
"No, no I can't leave him." I tell Puck as I hold on to Finn's hand and give it a slight squeeze. I am surprised as to what happens next. "Puck did you see that?" I ask him as tears of happiness begin to form.
"No, I didn't." Puck tells me
"Finn just squeezed my hand! He's awake Puck!" She tells him happily.
"What? Finn's awake?" He asked both shocked and happy that his friend is going to be ok.
"Hey." I hear Finn say his voice is thick.
"Hey." I smile and give him a kiss on the cheek.
"Where am I?" Finn asks groggy from the medicine.
"Dude, you're in the hospital. You were in a car accident." Puck explains to Finn.
"Ok…so why can I not feel my legs." Finn asks as Rachel and Puck both look at each other.
"Finn…I think we should get the doctor and he can tell you." Rachel says as she pushes the call button next to his bed.
"How are you feeling Mr. Hudson?" The doctor asks as he knocks on the door.
"Ok…I guess I can't fell my legs." Finn tells the doctor.
"Mr. Hudson as I was telling your wife you have some extensive damage to you spinal cord." The doctor starts to explain as Finn gives Rachel a strange look.
"So…is it permanent or am I going to be able to walk again?" Finn asks feeling an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.
"Mr. Hudson we are not sure but, we are hoping that the sooner we get you into some physical therapy the better." the doctor explains.
"So…doc when can he come home?" Puck asks.
"Well, we have to run a few more tests and if they come back good then he is free to go home." the doctor tells them. "I will go get the nurse so she can take some more blood from you." They all nod as the doctor leaves the room.
"Hey, Puck why don't you go tell the others that Finn is awake." Rachel tells him. Puck nods and leaves the room. Rachel walks over towards Finn's bed and gives him a kiss.
"What was that for Mrs. Hudson?" Finn teases remembering that the doctor said that she was his wife.
"It was Santana's idea they wouldn't tell us anything unless they knew I was your wife, I hope you don't mind." Rachel gives an embarrassed smile.
"Not at all actually I think it has a nice ring to it Rachel Hudson." Finn says as he lets the name roll off his lips.
"I guess it does doesn't it?" she tells him.
"So I was thinking maybe we could make it official or something?" He says
"Finn…we just got back together do you really think marriage is something we are ready for?" Yes, she wanted to marry him someday.
"You're not going to deny a guy who was on his death bed are you?" Finn gives her a puppy dog look.
"Finn, ok for one you are not dying and two as much as I would love to become Mrs. Finn Hudson for real now is not the time. We have so much still to work through. I want to marry you someday not now." Rachel does her best to explain to him her reasons.
"Rachel I get it I do. I was thinking that maybe when I get back on my feet maybe we should start looking for a place of our own." Finn explains to her. While the thought of her being his wife was amazing he knew that they still had a long road ahead of them.
"I think we can do that." Rachel smiles as she kisses Finn on the lips.
XXXX
*One Month later*
You're not alone
Together we stand
I'll be by your side
You know I'll take your hand
When it gets cold
And it feels like the end
There's no place to go
You know I won't give in
No, I won't give in
Finn's still in a wheelchair and is having a very hard time adjusting to the fact that he may not walk again.
"Hey honey you want some breakfast I can make you some eggs if you want?" Rachel offers seeing Finn getting up from the couch.
"No, thanks I think I will just grab me something to drink." He tells her in a dark tone as he reaches for the whiskey bottle on the coffee table.
"You mean another shot of Whiskey?" she spats at him grabbing the bottle from his hand.
"What the hell Rach?" he says pissed that she took the bottle.
"I am not going to let you wallow in your own self pity." She tells him dumping the bottle's contents out into the sink.
"I am not wallowing." He tells her pointedly.
"Really then what do you call it? You haven't been to a therapy session in two weeks. All you do is sit on that couch and get drunk. I am sick of it Finn I thought you wanted to walk again." Rachel who has had enough of Finn's self pity blows up at him.
"Don't you get it Rachel I am never going to walk again you heard the doctor." Finn tells her slamming his fist on the table causing her to flinch.
"Finn you have only been in therapy for a month. I know what the doctor said I was there but he also said there was still a chance of you walking again." Rachel tells him as she takes a seat in front of him.
"I know Rach…but it's so frustrating even the simplest of things are so hard and I just don't know if any of this is worth it anymore. Maybe I would be better off if I would've just died." Rachel's face falls after hearing the last part.
"How can you be so damned selfish?" She screams at him.
"It's the truth. Rachel I am miserable in this damn chair." he tells her as he grabs her hand.
"Finn it doesn't have to be that way. You know what you have to do to walk again and I will be here right by your side no matter what." Rachel tries to reassure him but she knows that it is not working. She can feel him slipping away from her and it scared her to death.
Keep holding on
Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through
Just stay strong
Cause you know I'm here for you
I'm here for you
There's nothing you can say
Nothing you can do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So, keep holding on
Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through
"Even if I will never be able to walk again? Are still going to be here?" Finn asks point blank.
"Of course Finn I told you once before that no matter what I am here. Good bad whatever may come our way I am yours until the end." She can see the doubt slowly wash away from his face.
"I love you Rachel and I am sorry it's…just I get so frustrated I didn't mean to take it out on you." He pulls her closer to him and kisses her.
"I know and I love you too. So…how about I help you with your bath and we can go to the therapist?" Finn nods his head and kisses her one more time as she wheels him into the bathroom.
Ok….well there you have it hope you enjoyed it.
Songs for this chapter
Broken By Lifehouse
Pretending by Glee cast
Don't Stop Believing by Glee cast
Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne
Up next
Santana comes to terms with her pregnancy and confronts the father.
Finn is still dealing with the fact he may not walk again.
Santana finally comes to terms with her pregnancy and confronts the father.
Finn gets a surprise visitor that motivates him even more to walk again.