The ride home was expectantly silent. Well, at least for me. Santana was in the other car, so I didn't have to avoid weird glances or anything awkward.

I still couldn't believe I acted so selfish. Her guard was up and I knew why, but I just went over it like it's nothing, like her feelings don't even matter a tiny bit to me. But she matters. That was the last thing on my mind to do, to just leave her dry out there and turn my back on her. I thought I could never do that. Yet, I did. I felt like I was going to vommit. Again.

Also, I couldn't quite understand why was she mad about everyone knowing. It's not like I wanted for everyone to know, I just didn't care if they did. Quinn and Rachel tried to hide themselves from others, but I'd still hear them talking on the phone late at night, whispering to each other all kinds of stuff. You didn't have to be very smart to figure it out.

If I had a chance, I would really like to kick Joe's cowardly ass for leaving Santana. Don't get me wrong. If he were still with her, I wouldn't probably stand a tiniest chance with her. I'm mad at him for hurting her so much.

I wanted so bad to show her how much love does she really deserve. I wanted to be that person. The person who could always make her feel good. All I needed was her help. I couldn't do that all by myself.

But if she thought I was going to give up without a fight, she was so wrong.

Santana's POV

"Why did you react like that?" Quinn attacked me as soon as we walked into the car.

"Like what?" I acted like I had no idea.

"You know! Like a cold bitch. That's not you. Not anymore. Not since Brittany came here", Quinn practically screamed into my face.

"Yes, that's exactly what I am. That's the real me", I tried.

"No, it's not. You're only you when you're with Brittany, I saw you. Don't even try." At least, Quinn stopped screaming and just whispered softly so only I could hear. And maybe Rachel who was sitting in her lap because there wasn't any space in the car left.

"I don't want her."

"What?!" I thought both of them were going to punch me in the face.

"No, no, you don't understand. Not like that", I tried to explain, "I don't wanna want her. Because I'm so fucking scared she'll leave and never come back."

"She's not Joe."

"I know, I know. Just, I don't think I could handle it", I admitted.

"Just give her a chance and you'll see", It was obvious Quinn wanted us to be together. Or she just didn't want us to fight. She was probably tired of it. Like everyone else. Like me.

"Oh, I don't know…"

Then I saw the look they gave me and I just couldn't fight them.

"Okay, but if it doesn't work out, I'm going to get both of your asses kicked", Quinn just rolled her eyes and Rachel just looked scared at Quinn. She whispered in her ear something like don't worry and smiled softly. That seemed to make the brunette calm a little.

Back at Brittany's POV

"I'll just crash in our room, I'm really tired and I need sleep. When I wake up, I'll see what I'll do with Santana", I said to Quinn when we came back home and carried our bags into the house. When we arrived, nobody was there. I was kind of glad, because I didn't want our parents to look at us all fucked up and hangover. Quinn either.

"Okay, I'll come after you, but first I need to go to Rachel's because I left my swimsuit in her bag. I'll be back soon."

I walked up the stairs and just fell onto the bed, leaving the door open. I didn't even change out of my clothes, I just took off my shirt and shorts so I was only in my bra and panties. I couldn't care less. Quinn was my cousin and we were sleeping in the same bed for 2 months. She also became one of my best friends.

I turned my back to the door and stared into that picture of Quinn, Tina, Mike, Rachel, Sam and Santana. That was the first picture I saw when I walked into Quinn's room for the first time. I just couldn't sleep, although I was dead tired. Thoughts about Santana just kept popping into my mind. What should I do, what should I say? Should I talk to her or should I just write a letter saying I'm sorry and leave? I couldn't do that. I needed someone to talk to. I hoped Quinn would come home soon.

Just when I thought that, I heard steps coming into the room. Those steps were the same ones as I heard late at night and early in the morning when Quinn came back after sneaking somewhere out with Rachel.

Without even bothering to move because I was really tired and every inch of my body hurt, I just kept laying still.

Quinn hopped into the bed and scooted by my side. I could tell by how her hot breath was hitting my neck.

"Quinn! I need you. I really need to talk about Santana and you're the only one who really knows what to do."

I didn't get an answer so I just continued. She wasn't sleeping, her breathing wasn't steady. It was shallow and fast, like she ran or something.

"This may sound weird, but I think I love Santana. Like, actually love her. Not love hanging out with her and stuff. Really love her. Everything she is, everything she does, everything she says is perfect to me. I know it's been only two months, but I can't deny my feelings any longer."

When I started talking, I couldn't stop. I just hoped I wasn't that boring to Quinn.

"She's driving me mad, Quinn. I love everything about her, especially these little things. Like how her brown eyes get that crazy shine when she thinks about doing something rebellious, and her dimples when she smiles, the way she always checks her hair but always runs through it with her hand and leaves it all wavy and free. I'm sorry, I should stop. You probably don't want to listen to this", I apologized when I understood I was saying too much.

"No, no, continue", Her face was probably burried into the pillow so her voice was muffled.

Her approval encouraged me so I continued.

"I want to be with her so badly, but I'm afraid she doesn't want me. I get that she's still hurt because of Joe and I really wanna punch him in the face for doing that to her. I know you probably don't believe me, but I'd never do that to her. Yeah, things may be hard because of all of the distance, but I'd do anything and we'd someway figure it out. I could never leave her just hanging dry. I swear I mean it. All I need is a sign that she's willing to try and fight."

Soft lips pressed into my shoulder and I freezed.

A/N Yeah, I'm probably dead because all of you are going to kill me for being away for so long, but I just lost an interest and school was all over my head. Now I'm on vacation so I have all the time. Tv show hiatuses also make a lot of things easier.
Review and tell me what do you think! :)