So this is a story for rubberbandgirlme on Tumblr, They asked for a fic based on the song 'Spit it out' by IAMX (My favourite band so I couldn't say no) I didn't want to turn this in to a song fic where it basically goes from the Lyrics step by step. This is my interpretation of the song, which basically is about 2 people who have issues and use sex as a coping tool, as a way to escape from their problems. But obviously this is a story about Loki and Tony who are possibly the biggest drama queens in the Marvel universe so I obviously had to exaggerate.
I'm sorry that it took a while to get this done, I actually closed the window without saving so I've had to write it again and I forgot most of what I put so I'm slightly unhappy with this T_T I hope you like it.
Spit it out.
It was another bitter and smoggy night in New York, the weather seemed to match Tony's mood. He hadn't slept properly in some time and found himself adventuring out into the Manhattan streets late at night. He has sick of staring at the same walls of his tower, he felt trapped. He couldn't even find solace in his lab. The void still haunted him, whenever he closed his eyes he was back there. surrounded by darkness and the glint light of stars. He would dream about the wormhole closing too soon and locking him there, of the cold that still made him shiver no matter how much he tried to warm up, the cold of space had seeped into his mind, it would always be there.
He didn't even want to think about the monsters that lurked within the void, fleets and fleets of Chitauri ships. He shuddered at the thought and pushed it to the back of his mind before entering the nearest bar.
The bar was surprisingly empty, only a few people sitting talking and others playing pool, He didn't mind, he would rather not be recognized anyway, all he wanted was to drink until he forgot.
He made his way to the bar and took a seat, ordered himself a scotch (no ice) and dropped a reasonable amount of money on the counter with the order to "keep 'em coming."
He gulped down the first drink just to feel the burn in the back of his throat and spread down into his stomach. He sighed loudly and placed the glass back on the bar so the bartender could quickly fill in back up for him.
"So great was the extremity of his pain and anguish, that he did not only sigh but roared." A voice spoke to Tony's left, he glanced over to see a slim figure sitting at the other end of the bar, his hair hanged in waves of ink black strands that curled over his face with the angle of his slumped head, his cheek rested on a curled up fist. This guy looked like he had some pain and anguish himself.
"To anguish." Tony called over and held his drink up in a mock toast.
"To pain." The stranger mirrored the jest.
Tony made his way towards the other man and took a seat beside him, "Can I buy you a drink?" He asked and tilted his head to get a better look at his new depressed buddy. The mop of black curls shifted and tilted his head to get a look at Tony. Tony was in the middle of asking the bartender to refill his friend's glass when he heard a sudden intake of air beside him. He sighed again, of course I he would be recognized. "Yeah I'm-" He turned his head to meet startled green eyes looking at him with a mix between fear and shock, "Loki...?"
Loki quickly pulled on his mask of interference and turned his head away, "What are you doing here? Stark." He asked and took the offered drink.
"I think that's my question." Tony frowned and pulled the glass off him.
"What does it look like? I'm drinking, well trying too." Loki snatched the glass back and took a generous swig before it could be pulled away again.
"Not what you're doing in here, what are you doing back in New York? I thought Thor took you back up to your magical golden castle in the sky?"
Loki rolled his eyes and sat up, he pulled his hair away from his face and pulled it from behind his ear to show strange markings branded into his skin. "Exiled." He spat, "These sigils were burnt into my skin to suppress my magic, I am as pathetic as your mortal race now." He let his hair fall back in place and took another sip.
"You got of pretty easy, having daddy take your magic tricks away from you and sent off to boarding school here on Midearth. Even a slap on the wrists would be more than that." Tony tapped his glass to signal for it to be topped up.
"As if I would share the details of my punishment with you, all I will have you know is that I have been punished plenty for my crimes and in ways your small mortal brain could not consider."
Tony just nodded his head and let Loki have his little drama queen moment. "So, can Norse ex-gods get drunk?" he asked, it was a very unsubtle change of subject but it worked for him.
Loki shook his head then shrugged, there was something defiantly off about the once elegant god.
"I can but not off anything I would find here, your watered down mead is nothing compared to the other 9 realms." Loki answered, "It would take nearly 30 of these for me to even feel a slight buzz, although I am unaware of how much this mortal form can take, so far I have been unsuccessful."
Tony smirked at that and swivelled on his chair. "So why are you here if you can't get drunk?"
"Why else does anyone come out to a tavern this late on their own if they do not intend to get intoxicated?" The little smirk on Loki's face answered all Tony needed to know from that comment. "And what about you? Why is the famous Tony Stark in a dingy tavern like this so late at night? I thought you would be off saving kittens from trees?"
"No reason, I just fancied a change of scenery, you know, to mingle with the common folk."
Loki glanced up at the man again, his thin lips pulled up in a smirk, "You look tired."
"I know that's just a nice way of saying I look like shit." Tony faux scowled at Loki who laughed, it sounded like a genuine laugh, which took Tony by surprise. "I just can't sleep," He admitted, he ran a hand over his face and let out a shuddery sigh, memories of the void flashing in his head at the mere thought of sleep and dreaming. He felt slender fingers making circular patterns on his arm, when he glanced over at Loki the god was smirking but it didn't have the same sharpness to it.
"How about I help you with that?" He offered and raised an eyebrow.
"You're not going to knock me over the head with something are you?" Tony looked worried for a moment.
Loki leaned closer to him, his lips near Tony's ear.
"No, I may be able to offer my assistance in some strenuous activities." He purred.
"And why would I want that from you?"
"Think of it as a service, I am looking for a...hook up I believe is the term you mortals use, and you are looking for something to exhaust you, so I offer me in exchange for your services." The god smiled again looking innocent. Tony pondered this for a moment, he looked Loki up and down, taking in his slender figure, his sharp cheekbones, those enchanting emerald eyes and his pale soft skin. He knew that it would be an extremely bad idea since Loki could probably kill him still, even without his powers but the offer and the bundle it came with seemed too good an opportunity to pass. If he was going to die then he may as well do it in style.
"Deal." Tony smirked. "But we're going back to mine."
"Worried to be around me without your little suit? Don't worry, if I intended to kill you I would have slit your throat on first glance."
"Comforting."
"I do try." Loki grinned and rose to his feet. "Shall we?"
x0x0x0x0x
That was how it started. After that very first night, it would become a habit for the both of them to indulge in each other. It was only sex, pleasure for pleasure, at least, that is what they told themselves.
When the anger and the depression seeped into his bones all Loki had to do was turn up to Stark's tower and he would immediately be led to the bedroom where he would be tied, whipped and choked. Anyway that he wanted it. Tony didn't ask questions. He just filled the emptiness of the void with pain and pleasure. Loki wanted anything just to feel. And Tony would fill that emptiness in the most intimate ways. It was perfect.
Other nights Loki would be awoken to yells and whimpers coming from beside of him as the man he had come so very fond of would thrash beneath the covers in a cold sweat. Loki would sooth Tony to the best of his abilities. He would whisper comforting words to the stirring man, explain to him that it was all just a dream and that he was safe here in his tower. He found that the man would slowly ease after that and use Loki's voice as some kind of Anchor. Even though Loki couldn't help but feel responsible; it was his doings after all that caused such a nightmare to happen. If he hadn't had been so weak back then, if he hadn't have let them warp his mind into taken over.
Who knows, he could have met Tony under different circumstances, he might have been able to have a health relationship with the mortal.
Sometimes Stark would awake and Loki would curl around him, he would press kisses to damp neck which would soon turn in to nips and bites. Pain helped to ground him after a particular bad dream so perhaps the same would help with Tony.
This would normally end up with Stark rolling him over and violently holding him until he screamed for mercy. But Loki didn't mind this, he felt like it was an almost punishment for his crimes against the mortal. Tony would hold his arms behind his back and push him to the bed with a thumb pressed against the pulse of Loki's writs. Thrusting into him in an animalistic manor and growling his hate for the god.
This did hurt but Loki knew he didn't mean it, he knew that the mortal needed this.
0x0x0x0x0
Some mornings Tony would wake up and see the mess he had made of the ex-god, the guilt would hit his stomach in waves but Loki would ease it all by turning to look at him and smiling. It was moments like that when Tony almost thought he could love the man. But love had no place in their relationship. It would ruin everything.
He would watch Loki from the bed as he collected his clothes and made his way to the bathroom for a shower, this would be Tony's queue to go down to the lab. He would stay there until Jarvis would inform him that Loki had left.
He would sometimes feel bad that he couldn't offer Loki more after how patient the god had been with his moods. That was not to say that Loki didn't have his own break downs, the god was worse than an old run down car. Tony would feel conflicted when the god would beg him to hurt him, to make him feel something other than rage. Part of him just wanted to reach out and hold the god because he was just as broken as he was. But Loki didn't need pity, he needed raw emotion. He didn't need Tony's love and Tony wasn't about to give it to him.
Stark recalled one particular night, he had been working in his lab when Loki came into his tower. JARVIS had let him in, The AI had been informed of their arrangement but was told to always be on guard incase the avengers needed to be called.
On this night Loki was a mess, his features and his posture was almost wild and when Tony reached the living room the god practically growled at him before falling to pieces and begging Tony to make it stop.
Tony could have just held him then and told him it was going to be ok but he knew that wouldn't work with Loki. So he took him to his lab, tied him to a metal table, placed a blindfold over his eyes and fucked him while heavy metal blasted over the speakers, so loud that it was almost impossible to think. The overload of Loki's senses and the chaos of the music seemed to calm him. He seemed more relaxed after his orgasm and the silence was welcomed after. The slight hum in his ears and the feeling of his pulse racing reminding Loki that he was really hear and not just suffering from a dream, that he wasn't still falling through the vast vacant silence of the void.
Yes this relationship was unhealthy. Yes it was probably going to blow up in their faces once love became involved but right now they both didn't care less because they loved to take the risk.