My deepest apologies for the wait. This one is twice as long though? Thank you for sticking with it and reviewing. I love you.
There's no one else to blame
Micah stopped breathing, almost dropping the phone due to the shock he felt. "What?"
It took a second for Shane to calm down enough to speak. "I said you were wrong. About Reed and Blaine. They are cheating. They- they-" He trailed off as the sobbing started again.
"They what, Shane?" Micah asked softly, patiently waiting for him to control his crying. He was confused, but he wouldn't allow himself to feel any worry until he knew what Shane was talking about. He sincerely hoped Shane was just being hysterical again. He didn't want him to get hurt.
"They were in the bathroom together!" He finally managed, finding it difficult to talk when he was crying so hard.
Micah blinked. "So…?" That wasn't as bad as he thought it'd be.
"So they were both shirtless! Not to mention the fact this is the third time this has happened!"
Okay, maybe it was. Micah sighed, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose. He thought over his next words carefully, trying to come up with something that would help relieve Shane's stress, maybe convince him that Reed wasn't cheating on him. But even he couldn't deny that he was starting to consider it too.
"Okay, just because they were in a bathroom together doesn't mean they're fooling around."
Shane's grip on the phone tightened. "Are you serious! What else could it mean?"
Micah shrugged even though Shane couldn't see him. "I don't know. Maybe they're hiding something and were just discussing it in private."
"Yeah, they were discussing how they could keep their torrid love affair a secret!"
Micah sighed. "Shane."
"And besides," Shane interrupted, voice frantic. "Why would they need their shirts off to talk?"
That's where Micah was stumped. Even he, being who he was and trying so hard to come up with a logical explanation, had to admit that the lack of clothing didn't exactly scream innocent.
"I don't know," he admitted reluctantly. "But we have to take everything I said earlier into account. This is Reed and Blaine. And the fact that they wouldn't ever do this still remains. Why would they want to mess up what they already have?"
Shane sniffed, wiping at his eyes. "I don't know! Maybe they've always had a thing for each other and are just now acting on it?"
"Shane, you're being hysterical. And delusion. Stop looking for problems that aren't there."
Shane's tone turned harsh. "There sure as hell is a problem here, Micah! I don't just mean the times they've been in the bathroom together! Reed has been acting so differently lately. I don't know what to do!"
Micah sat up a little straighter. "Acting differently how?"
"Does your back feel better?" Blaine asked as Reed climbed onto his bed with a look of pain twisting his features.
"Yes," he mumbled quietly. "Thanks."
Blaine watched him turn the covers down and shove his feet under them with concern. It wasn't even nine o'clock yet.
"Don't you want to put on your pajamas first?" he whispered, scared by the void look Reed was giving him, the look that turned hard the second Blaine asked another question. "Have you even done your homework, yet?"
"Do you really think I care about my stupid homework?"
He shuffled awkwardly. "What about food? You hardly ate lunch. What about dinner? You need to eat."
Reed glared at him, saying nothing.
Blaine sighed, choosing to drop that subject for now and bring up another that had been worrying him. He actually hadn't stopped worrying about it from the second he walked into Reed's room yesterday, the very second everything had changed for the worse, sending his whole world spiraling on a nonstop pivot downward.
"Reed, I'm really scared. I don't have any idea how to help you. Obviously since things have gotten worse, I'm doing a shit job of helping you get better. I'm at a loss here. I don't know what to do for you." He sighed again, preparing for the aftermath of his next words. "I know I've said it before, but we really need to tell someone. How long do you think we can keep it a secret from everyone? From Shane?" Reed's body stiffened at the name and the glaring hadn't ceased. "And as I've just mentioned, I don't know what I'm doing! You need someone who does! Someone who can –"
"Stop!" Reed finally shouted, and Blaine visibly drew back at the malice in his eyes. "We've already talked about this! No one can know! No one! And especially Shane! Don't you understand why!"
"No!" Blaine yelled back, now on edge. "I don't! I don't get why we can't just them or him! Don't you get how he feels about you? He'll understand. He won't hate you, none of them will!"
Reed's breathing was becoming heavy and his cold wall finally fell. He was soon gasping, trying to fight off the inevitable sobs, and clutching onto the blanket tightly as his face scrunched up in pain. "Yes, he will!" The tears started falling then, and he quickly glanced away, unwilling to let Blaine see him cry yet again.
Blaine dropped down on the bed, sitting in front of him and trying to put a comforting hand on his heaving body. He just shook it off though, scooting away.
"Don't cry. I'm sorry. I just don't understand how you could ever think Shane would hate you for anything, especially something like this." He took a deep breath, steadying his voice. "It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault and it's never going to be your fault." Reed's crying intensified to the point he could barely breathe. "And Shane would understand that. He'd never blame you."
Reed said nothing, struggling to breathe properly. He didn't intend on saying anything either. He knew what Blaine was talking about, but he also knew how wrong he was. Shane, along with all the others, would be disgusted if they ever found out. And they would all know who was at fault. Who else but the small, weak person he was? He let this happen. And he knew for a fact that Shane would never forgive him for, once again, not being strong enough. He let the monster in and it was up to him to deal with the consequences.
After a long moment in which neither of them spoke had passed, Blaine sighed.
"Would you at least talk to someone? Professional." He added quickly. "Someone who knows how to handle this. Someone who can help you through it?"
Reed's swollen eyes glanced back to him and he narrowed them slowly. "No." His voice was back to its previous roughness and he sat up, glaring openly. "It's not going to happen. What part of I'm a minor don't you understand? They'll tell my mother. And she can't know either." His eyes drifted away, looking on somewhere distant. "What would she say?" He drew into himself, cowering as he shook.
Blaine was floored at that. He hadn't thought about that. Everyone knew Hilde wasn't the easiest woman to get along with, or persuade. And he already knew what she would say. She would blame him. She would make him feel even worse about the whole situation. He knew exactly why Reed didn't want her to find out. Now he didn't either. But how could they get Reed professional help if doing that meant Hilde would undoubtedly ruin any and all progress by filling his head with feelings of blame. He could hear her now.
"How could you let this happen to you, Reed?" "Why didn't you do this, Reed?" "Well you could have done this." "You shouldn't have said that." "You shouldn't have done that." "Why did you even go there?" "You could have prevented that from happening." "What were you wearing? Did you provoke this?" "You were basically asking for this to happen."
That was the last thing Reed needed to hear. But it would probably be one of the first if she found out. And from his own mother. She wouldn't get it, she would never understand.
So what could they do? Blaine was stuck. Either way they were hopeless.
This was the absolute worst thing to ever happen to any of them. And it had to be Reed.
He finally managed to calm Reed down, and after he started hiding under his covers, trying to sleep and demanding Blaine leave the room, he had no choice but to go.
He opened his door miserably, feeling completely helpless. There was nothing he could do. And that made him feel even worse than he had the entire day of having to watch Reed suffer.
As soon as he was inside, Shane walked out of their en suit bathroom, dressed in his pajamas and eyes that were rimmed with red. He walked passed Blaine without even a glance in his direction. Blaine wasn't sure if he imagining the icy glare he was given in the split second Shane finally looked to him.
"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, stopping in front of his bed.
He wasn't expecting Shane's voice to be so cold when he replied. "Why the hell would you care?"
Blaine's mouth slacked open and he stared at his brother's back with feelings of panic and guilt battling in his stomach. "W-what?"
Shane turned around in a flash, expression matching his voice perfectly. "You heard me! Since when do you care about me?"
Now it was Blaine's turn to feel angry. Hadn't he shown time and time again of putting up with all Shane's whining how much he cared about him?
"What is that supposed to mean? Of course I care about you! You're my brother, how could I not?"
Shane sneered, and Blaine was sure he could see mounds of hurt underneath all Shane's fury. "Some brother." He pulled his blanket off his bed roughly. "I'm staying with Wes and David."
Before he could get to the door Blaine had jumped forward, grabbing onto his shoulder. Shane threw the hand off violently.
"Don't touch me!"
"Hold on!" Blaine shouted back, "What is this about! Why are you so mad at me?"
He stopped breathing as he waited for Shane to respond, fearing the worse, fearing the truth.
Shane just glared at him silently, offering nothing else except a harsh, "Like you don't know."
He was gone, door slamming roughly, before Blaine could even breathe. He stood there frozen, too shocked to go after him. His mind was reeling a thousand thoughts a minute. Did this mean that Shane found out? But no, that was impossible. There was no way for him to know… right? If he found out he'd surely be over there comforting Reed right now though. Then what could he possibly be so mad at? Unless Reed was right and Shane really was mad at him. But he couldn't be! He'd never be mad at Reed for something that wasn't his fault! Hell, he probably wouldn't even be mad if Reed did something that was his fault. So what did he mean by "like you don't know?"
Blaine's head was starting to throb. This situation just took a turn for the worst.
Arms were curled tightly around the pillow that was rapidly becoming soaked with tears. Reed hadn't stopped crying since Blaine left his room a little over half an hour ago, even though he tried. He tried to keep quiet the moment he heard Kurt return from dinner, he tried to ignore the pain that was still radiating throughout his entire body, but the thing he was trying the hardest to do, and he wasn't doing a very good job, was block out the images that kept flooding into his mind. The second he closed his eyes, ready to fall into unconsciousness, it was the first thing he saw. It always was. And nothing could keep it out.
Scenes from the incident replaying over in his mind, the ghostly feelings of his hands on his skin, the pain, it was too much to take and he didn't know how to make it stop.
But since Kurt was now in the room with him he had no choice but to stifle the sobs in his pillow, which had already caught too many of his tears.
Shane's pillow was also catching tears, as he would spend the majority of the night crying silently as well, while Kurt and Blaine would toss and turn, frightful and full of dread and fear.
Reed's body jerked violently, pulled out of a nightmare that vanished from his memories the second his eyes opened. He was woken by Kurt who was standing over him frowning.
"Are you alright?" Kurt asked and Reed could tell he was being scrutinized.
"Y-yes." He could also tell his pathetic answer would do nothing to help convince Kurt that he was alright. He flinched away when Kurt laid a hand on his forehead.
"You're sweating. Are you sure you're okay?" The way he said it suggested Kurt didn't need an answer, he already knew he wasn't.
"I… I," Reed stuttered. He didn't know what he was. "I feel like puking." That wasn't entirely a lie but he suspected that was just because of nerves.
Kurt sat on the edge of his bed. "You look like it, too. Do you want to stay back today?"
"I can't."
Kurt frowned at Reed's voice. It sounded raspy, tired, exactly how he looked. He decided to be honest. "Reed, you look downright terrible." Reed appeared to be unaffected. He didn't care. "You should really just stay here. And sleep." He added as an afterthought, remembering Reed's nightmare and the nap he took the day before. And with remembering that brought the memory of what he saw. "Reed." He paused, selecting his word carefully. "Do you need to tell me something? Because you know you can."
Reed froze and Kurt could clearly see the panic in his wide eyes. If he even had any doubt that the welts on his back were just an accident, and he didn't, the way Reed was reacting now took that away.
"N-no." His answer was just as Kurt predicted.
"Then why are you hiding something from me?"
"I…" Reed sniffed although Kurt couldn't see any tears. "I'm not."
"Yes, you are." Kurt nodded sadly. He didn't look angry at all, and that confused Reed. "You're my best friend, you think I can't tell? I know you are, I just don't know why you'd think you couldn't tell me." He stood up and walked away, returning to his side of the room and Reed suddenly realized why he didn't look mad. He was hurt, betrayed that Reed couldn't trust him enough to tell him the secret.
He was left feeling guilty on top of everything else, and wondering how he planned on getting through the day.
Blaine was up, but he didn't feel very awake. Another restless night spent worrying about Reed was taking a toll. He didn't even bother gelling his hair, only combing it back. Reed wasn't the only one he worried about. He was also stressing about his brother and their last conversation. He still didn't have any idea what Shane was talking about, "like you didn't know."
Like he didn't know. He really didn't. The only thing he knew was the truth which he was certain Shane didn't. There was no way he would react like that. He would not blame Reed. He wouldn't.
He exited his room solemnly; the same room he had gotten used to sharing with Shane, who had a way of making it feel even homier. It hurt more than he thought to have Shane mad at him, and even if he didn't know why, he knew he deserved it.
As soon as he was in the hall he could see Shane leaving Wes and David's room, looking just as tired and worn as Blaine did.
He glanced up, spotting Blaine but there wasn't any hatred in his gaze. He stared at him blankly for only a couple of seconds before turning and walking down the stairs, as if he didn't see him at all.
It might have been silly but Blaine thought that would hurt more than a malicious glare. At least that way Shane would be announcing that he was angry. This made him feel like Shane wasn't acknowledging him at all, and that felt like he was saying he didn't want anything to do with him, like he no longer considered him a brother. (Some brother.) And that hurt more than anything.
He barely moved three inches before Wes and David were filing out into the hall too, advancing on him with questioning looks on their faces.
"Hey!" David started and even though he was speaking quite loudly, he didn't look mad. "You wanna tell us why Shane showed up in our room last night, looking devastated and demanding he slept there?"
"And nearly kicking me death due to all his tossing," Wes added in a whisper, rolling his eyes when David shushed him.
"I don't know," Blaine answered quietly, glancing away.
"Why aren't you telling the truth?" David demanded, crossing his arms. He was beginning to look a little irritated.
Blaine shrugged, picking at his blazer. He was so tired of lying. "I am."
David snorted. "Thanks for lying to us. Means a lot." He stalked off with a less annoyed looking Wes following him.
Blaine sighed but not even five seconds had elapsed when another door opened and Kurt emerged, looking dejected and somewhat confused. He looked up at Blaine and unlike Shane, something in Kurt's eyes changed when he saw him standing there looking distressed. But he still said nothing, going by him and down the stairs without a word.
As Blaine stood by the door, waiting for Reed, he couldn't help but dwell on the fact that this situation was tearing everybody apart.
As soon as Reed stepped out of his room Blaine had to raise his eyebrows. He looked even more of a mess than yesterday. At least yesterday he tried to appear normal, decent. Today he could tell that Reed didn't care. His clothes were wrinkled, a thing Reed would never have allowed in the past, and his hair was sticking up everywhere, looking frizzy at some points. Blaine could tell that meant he didn't use one of the many hair products he used to keep his curls down and shiny. His eyes weren't the only part of him that looked exhausted, his whole body said he was about to collapse. It was hard to take in.
"You look awful."
He wasn't sure if Reed had even heard him speak, not until, "So I've been told." His voice was so quiet Blaine had to strain to hear what was being said.
He reached to brush a lock of twisted hair out of Reed's face, dropping his hand when Reed flinched away. "Are you sure you don't want to stay here?"
Instead of answering, Reed walked by him, heading towards the staircase.
Blaine frowned, following quickly to catch up. He bit his lip once he was walking beside Reed, wanting to ask a question but not sure if he should.
"Does…" he stalled briefly, "Does it still hurt when you walk?"
When Reed responded they were already down the steps. "Not as bad." His voice was still just as quiet.
Blaine sighed, a little relieved but not much. "Has… has Shane talked to you?"
Reed shook his head. He didn't understand why Blaine wanted to know. On one hand he was thankful that he hadn't, but one the other, he missed Shane. It felt like he hadn't seen Shane in ages, but he knew that every time he did see him it was a struggle to act normal, and he was doing a terrible job so far. He wanted to be with Shane but at the same time he wanted Shane to stay away.
Blaine was worrying his lip, not sure what else to say. It felt weird walking alone with Reed. He was so used to walking to class with the big group of conspirators, and now almost all of them were mad at him. And Reed was so far into pretending nothing happened, pretending he couldn't feel any of the pain, it was like he wasn't here at all.
He was in his own world of hurt and Blaine had no idea how to reach him there.
As soon as they reached the main building of the school, Reed latched onto Blaine's arm, just as he expected him to. Mostly everyone else was already there as they were a couple of minutes late. That didn't matter though. Even if there were only a few people in the room, it was still enough to make Reed want to hide. Knowing one of those people could be him made him want to disappear.
He closed his eyes, pressing his face into Blaine's arm and leaning onto him. Blaine didn't mind. He put an arm around him, supporting his weight and leading them to their first class.
The morning passed in a way entire reminiscent to the previous one. Blaine gave Reed his blazer to cushion his chair, and Reed didn't touch any of his assignments. He hardly cared about them or the fact his grade would suffer because of the last two days.
Every transition between classes found Reed clutching onto Blaine's arm tightly. He didn't care if people stared, and only the ones that knew about them and their significant others did. Even though they said nothing Dwight, Evan, Ethan, Wes, David, and especially Kurt stared. Even Logan stopped to raise his eyebrows at them before shaking his head and deciding it was none of his business. But Shane was nowhere to be found. Blaine would be correct in assuming he was going out of his way to avoid the pair of them, and that made Blaine feel sick to his stomach.
By the time lunch came around Blaine was sure there would a bruise marking the place Reed clutched onto every time they were in the halls. He was grabbing onto the same spot as they made their way to lunchroom. Even though the whole group savor Shane was walking together, it was deadly silent.
No one spoke a word, even after everyone had sat down. They starting eating, none of them daring to break the heavy silence. Reed didn't even bother getting any food, he laid his head on his arms on the table the moment he was seated.
Blaine stopped eating, reaching over to rub Reed's back soothingly. He was careful to keep his hand high, avoiding the wounds he tried his best to bandage last night.
Kurt watched him with narrowed eyes. He could tell what he was doing from the way Blaine moved. This meant that he did see the welts last night, he knew they existed. Did that mean he knew the reason why? He bit his tongue. He wasn't going to ask in front of everyone.
David didn't seem to be as hesitate. He dropped his silverware. "Alright." His tone was harsh and everyone except Reed looked over at him. "What is going on?" He now spoke directly to Reed although he didn't glance up. "You have been acting so freaking weird lately. And now Shane is staying with Wes and me and not even here with us right now and you're basically attached to his brother. Do you want to tell us what we're missing?"
Reed didn't attempt to look up, or even move. Not until David, annoyed by the way he was being blatantly ignored, shouted, "Reed!"
Reed jumped, although he didn't look up, only closed in on himself, cowering.
Blaine glared. "Leave Reed alone." Even he was surprised by how cruel his voice sounded.
David stared at him in shock. He finally looked away, laughing without any humor. "So let me get this straight. It's obvious Shane is angry with you over something otherwise he'd be here right now and he wouldn't have slept in Wes' bed last night." Wes discreetly rolled his eyes. "So you must have done something to upset him. And now all day today you and Reed have been practically attached at the hip. Seems very suspicious if you ask me."
The twins and Dwight watched in stunned silence. Kurt merely rolled his eyes, looking back at his food. He knew what he was implying and he didn't have time to think like that. He already knew that wasn't the truth. Blaine however, scowled. "And just what are you insinuating?"
"I think you know exactly what I'm insinuating."
Wes chose now to interfere. "Okay guys, hold on. Let's not fight."
"No," David cut him off, continuing like he never said anything. "How dare you do that to your brother. How could you?"
"I didn't do anything!" Blaine shouted. "In case you haven't noticed, Kurt is sitting right there!"' He pointed to Kurt who smiled a tight, sarcastic smile at David.
"Okay so what does Reed have to say about this?" David demanded, turning to small boy who was still lying on his arms, tightly hiding his face. "Well, Reed. What's going on with you and Blaine, and why isn't Shane here?"
As soon as Reed's shoulders started shaking, showing he was crying yet again, Blaine had enough. He stood up, shouting in a heated voice. "I said leave Reed alone, dammit!"
Everyone stared up at him, stunned. Even Reed finally looked up, wiping at his tears as more continued to fall.
"Blaine," he whispered, hiding his face behind quivering hands so he wouldn't have to see all his friends who now stared at him. "Can we please leave now?"
Blaine took a deep breath, trying to calm down. "Sure." He reached a hand out for Reed to take, helping him his feet. Neither one of them said another word as they left together, leaving six boys watching after them, confused and gasping.
As they walked off to study hall, Reed clutching onto his arm and using it as a shield for his sight, Blaine was only feeling worse. He had spent the rest of the lunch hour calming Reed down, who was now feeling even guiltier than ever. It hurt so bad to see him cry again, and what was worse was knowing he had no way of helping.
His stomach dropped when they got to the classroom the exact time as Shane. Even though Shane had looked at him with a completely void face this morning, Blaine could see his brother's heart break once he saw the two of them together, Reed wrapped tightly around his arm. He could see all the hurt in his misty eyes and the way his face winced ever so slightly at the sight of him.
"Shane, I…" Words failed him, and even if he knew what to say, Shane didn't give him any chance. He turned and walked straight into the classroom.
When Blaine said the name, Reed peeked up from behind his arm for the first time that day just in time to see Shane's retreating back. His heart ached. He missed Shane but he couldn't stand having to lie to him.
Shane pretended not to notice when they finally entered the room. He pretended not to see Blaine give Reed his blazer, or hear Reed's small thank you. He pretended not to feel the worry when Reed sat down, burying his head into his arms and shaking. Most of all, he pretended his couldn't feel all the devastating hurt from seeing his suspicions confirmed when he saw them together outside; he pretended he wasn't crying.
Reed was pretending , too. Pretending none of this ever happened, it was all a dream. And he, like Shane, was pretending he wasn't crying.
Kurt spent the study hall chewing on the end of his pencil, something he usually would never do (too unsanitary) and going over everything he knew in his head, adding the new knowledge from today and last night.
Blaine was chewing on his lip. He had been biting it so much over the last couple days it was now bleeding, but he didn't care. He was busy trying to figure out what Shane meant last night and trying to find a way to help Reed. He was so confused and sleep deprived it hurt to think.
Once the bell finally rang, dismissing them to the last class of the day, most of the people were out of their seats, running to the door. Shane hung back, pretending to take a long time packing up while he subtly watched Blaine shake Reed who had fallen asleep sometime during the class awake. Even if he did break his heart, that didn't stop him from being worried about him.
Reed woke up, blinking eyes that were red and puffy. He looked like he could use a few more hours of the sleep, but they still had one more class. He handed Blaine his blazer back, glancing at Shane who was working hard to keep his head down and not look at him. He only glanced at him briefly, eyes welling up once more, before he walked out of the classroom, Blaine following and telling him he'd walk him to his next class.
Shane fell back into his chair, forcing himself not to cry again. He still couldn't believe it. He just could not. This was Blaine, his brother and Reed! Everything Micah had said about them was true, they would never hurt him like this, but here they were! Throwing it right in his face. He pressed his hands over his mouth, holding back the sobs.
His brother knew that the only thing he wanted more than anything in the world was Reed. And it had been since the second he saw him. It was miracle he even managed to get what he wanted: the right to call Reed his. It shocked him like nothing else when Reed appeared to feel the same way about him, and he vowed he would never do anything to mess it up. He would never do anything to hurt him, or make his angel cry. He wouldn't let others do those things either. And he would never cheat on him. He never would have imagined it would be the other way around, not with Reed's history of never being attracted to another person. And it was his own brother. That made it all the worse. It hurt so badly he wanted to die.
He stayed sitting, giving the other two enough time to get out of the building so he didn't have to see them together again. It was too much to handle.
After a couple of minutes waiting, he finally left, and when he did, he was lucky enough to find that they were still there in the hallway. But something wasn't right.
As soon as Blaine had mentioned walking Reed to his last class, Reed stopped in the middle of the hallway. Blaine was thankful it was an empty hallway because Reed immediately started shaking and crying.
"Reed," Blaine moved in front of him. "What is it?"
"I can't go there!" Reed cried, staring at Blaine with wide, scared eyes.
"Why n –" Blaine stopped, instantly remembering why. "Oh. But Reed you can't keep skipping Art. You're going to get in trouble and they'll want an explanation. What do you plan on telling them?"
"I don't know!" Reed looked panicked. "Can't I just get out of that stupid class!"
Blaine never thought he'd hear Reed call art stupid. But he completely understood why. "I don't know how you'd do that though. It's already pretty late in the semester."
Reed started crying harder. "I don't want to go! I can't go!"
When his body started shaking, Blaine stepped forward, wrapping his arms around him. "It's okay, you don't have to." He ran a hand through Reed's frazzled curls, trying to comfort him.
At that moment Shane left the classroom, walking into the hall to see them holding onto to each other, Blaine soothing Reed who was heavily crying. He froze instantly, aching to be in Blaine's spot. It surprised him when Reed spoke, sounding choked.
"Please don't make me."
Blaine was quick to answer. "Don't worry, I won't." He held Reed tighter.
Confusion found its way amidst the worry and pain in Shane's head. He wanted to know what Blaine had been trying to make Reed do. Could it be he wanted Reed to tell him about them but Reed couldn't bring himself to do it? Well he didn't need to worry about that. Shane already knew everything. It's not like they had been discreet.
He turned, walking down the opposite end of the hall and trying to ignore the fear and concern he felt over seeing Reed cry like that. It hurt like hell, but he couldn't do anything about it. Reed had Blaine now, and apparently that's who he wanted.
"Come on," Blaine said, standing up straight seconds after Shane, who he had idea had even been there, had left, "I'll skip with you. We'll go back to Windsor."
Reed nodded, sniffing and following Blaine numbly. He grabbed onto his arm once more, surprised when he found himself thinking of Shane again.
Shane was leaning against the same wall as yesterday, skipping his last class, too. This time he didn't call Micah. He was crying so hard he didn't think he could even talk. It hurt so bad.
He didn't think he could ever feel like this.
As the end of the class approached Shane tried to get it together. He wiped his cheeks dry when the bell rang, standing up and starting the walk to Windsor. He moved slowly, going over everything that happened in last two days in his head. He tried to think of any other explanation, coming up empty. After seeing them in the hall before and after study hall, he really didn't have any doubt, even though he wanted to be wrong more than anything.
It was settled though. Reed was cheating on him with Blaine. And if the conversation he walked in on after study hall was any indication, they couldn't find a way to tell him.
Well, Shane thought bitterly. He was suddenly running intently. They won't have to. I'll tell them.
Blaine didn't mean to fall asleep. He spent a good deal of the last hour trying to convince Reed to take a nap, and when he finally did, Blaine settled on Kurt's bed, trying to work on homework, but two sleepless nights had him doing just what Reed was.
They were both shocked awake when the room was infiltrated by the conspirators. Everyone except Shane was present.
Blaine knew he had to be worried when Kurt starting pleading, "Guys, please just drop it, okay?"
He didn't tell them anything, but now he knew they were going to try to force Blaine tell them what was going on.
David ignored him. "Blaine, we're not stupid." He didn't sound as angry as before, only upset and curious. "Something is going on with you two and Shane."
"And we want in," Evan interrupted.
"Why do you think you can keep something from us?" Ethan finished and each twin crossed their arms.
Blaine was off the bed, watching Reed sit up and wrap his arms around his legs, hide his face behind his knees and shake.
He looked back to the others, determined. "There's really nothing to tell."
"Yeah right." David sighed. "Look I feel guilty about assuming you were with Reed. I can now deduce that Reed and Shane had a fight and you're trying to comfort him, and Shane's getting pissy because you're 'taking his side.' Is that right, Reed?"
Blaine looked for Reed's reaction only to see him full on crying again. He wished he never had to see Reed cry again.
"Just tell us," Ethan urged. "We won't judge you because you're fighting."
"As a matter of fact, we'll only try to find a way to get you two back together." Evan added, trying to smile. He didn't understand why Reed only cried harder.
They all jumped when the door banged open again, revealing Shane who looked like he'd seen better days. He was flushed, hair a mess and out of breath, panting. He didn't look at any of them, training his eyes on Reed and walking passed them all straight to where Reed was sitting on his bed, watching him with terror in his eyes. He had never seen Reed look at him like that before, and it broke his heart even more.
The room was completely silent, everyone staring at Shane, Blaine and Reed in varying degrees of panic, everyone else merely curiosity.
They all waited for him to speak, Reed's heart stopping the moment he said those first two words.
"I know." Shane sounded shattered as he looked at Reed in sorrow, speaking only to him. "I know everything." He could see Reed's eyes growing wider and the way he stopped breathing, staring at Shane in pure, unfiltered panic. Shane's face scrunched up in pain and he started crying again. "How could you do this to me?"
Reed jumped up and off the bed, standing beside it weakly. His knees were shaking and he felt like fainting. This couldn't be happening, Shane couldn't have found out! He couldn't! How did he? He started breaking down, crying out, "I'm sorry!"
Nobody dared to move, speak, or even breathe as they watched in stunned silence.
"I'm sorry, Shane! Please! I'm… I…" he couldn't find the words. There was no excuse for what he had done.
Shane was still crying, looking away from Reed's pleading eyes. "How?" Shane repeated in a voice that was strangled and broken. "How could you?"
"I'm so sorry!" Reed cried again. He couldn't believe this was happening. "I just… couldn't." Shane's brows pulled together, making his heart broken expression confused. Reed shook harder, squeezing his eyes shut, forcing himself to say it. "I swear I wouldn't! He forced me to do it!"
Blaine's breath caught. Here is was.
Nobody paid attention when Kurt gasped, clasping his hands over his mouth, whispering a doleful "Oh my god." Everything was now clicked into place for him. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. It couldn't be true…
Shane stopped crying, sniffing as he looked to were Blaine's shell shocked form was standing. "Blaine… made you cheat on me?"
Everyone except Kurt turned their wide eyes to Blaine as well, trying to keep up and figure it out.
"Blaine?" Shane asked in confusion. "You…"
Blaine finally met his eyes. "What! No! Shane, Reed isn't cheating on you! And certainly not with me! What were you thinking!"
Shane drew back, a little surprised. "You mean you're not together?"
"No!" Blaine shouted. What a stupid thought! He couldn't believe Shane had been thinking of that all this time. Didn't he know what was happening right this second?
Shane sighed deeply, eyes now dry and feeling somewhat relieved. He glanced up and was confused to see that no one else appeared to feel like he did. Everyone was watching him in horror, and Kurt wasn't watching him at all. He was sitting on his bed, crying. He didn't understand why, he just knew that he was glad Reed wasn't cheating on him.
He turned to smile at him, but it instantly faded once he saw Reed visibly shaking with panic, staring at him with unmistakable terror.
He felt confused. "What's –" He stopped, remembering it in a flash. He was suddenly whispering. "What did you say?" Reed shook harder, eyes filling up and looking like he would faint at any moment. Shane's face fell in numbed comprehension. "Who forced you to do what?" He asked calmly.
Reed's shaking increased to the point he could no longer stand. He dropped to ground at the foot of his bed, burying his head in his hands and he sobbed. "I'm sorry," he said in between sobs and two words never sounded more heartbreaking.
Shane's muscles froze. He didn't hear Blaine move to console Kurt, who was crying harder. He didn't hear anything except for Reed's cries and his voice. "Reed," he spoke with an edge. "Who forced you to do what?"
Reed griped onto his arms tightly, nails digging in. His eyes were sealed shut and he started rocking slightly, pretending to be somewhere else, anywhere else. This wasn't happening.
Shane couldn't breathe. This wasn't happening. It had to be a joke, a lie, a dream. "Reed," he whispered so quietly even he couldn't hear it. He spoke louder now, almost shouting. "What did he force you to do!"
Reed looked down, crying harder than ever. He whispered only a couple of words that shattered Shane's world of denial. "You know." He hid by burying his head into his arm, not daring to look at Shane's eyes. "So please don't make me say it."
Shane stepped back in a daze, stumbling and nearly falling over as he tried to process this. What did that mean? He didn't understand. His gut was churning with nerves and fear. The only thing it could mean was impossible. Impossible…
"Don't…" he heard someone from behind him nervously chuckle, but was unable to place the voice. "Don't say things like that, Reed. You make it sound like…"
"Don't joke like that, Reed!" another voice cut in, sounding riled. "It's not funny!"
Reed didn't answer, still hiding his face as his crying became louder. He could hardly breathe. Shane's stomach was now twisting painfully and his breath was erratic. His legs started to shake. Why wasn't Reed correcting everyone!
Suddenly his brother's voice behind him brought him back to reality. He sounded forlorn, scared. "It's not a joke."
Shane's head whipped around to face him, staring at him so intensely Blaine turned his eyes back to Kurt, who had a hand over his mouth, quietly crying. But just from that spilt second of eye contact Blaine could easily see all the different emotions battling in Shane's eyes. He knew exactly how he felt.
"What!" he demanded and Blaine flinched, keeping his eyes on Kurt.
"How do you know that, Blaine?" Wes asked, sounding for too calm for Shane's liking.
"Everyone just shut up!" Shane shouted. It felt like someone was trying to claw their way out from the inside of his stomach. He turned back to Reed who hadn't moved at all. "Tell them they're wrong, Reed!" His eyes were starting well and his voice shook. "Tell them this is a misunderstanding."
David jumped forward, wearing a hard mask. He knelt down, trying to look Reed in his face that was still being hidden by his arm. "Reed," he spoke gently, "You aren't exactly being clear here. You have to tell us. Think about what you're saying. I'll start the sentence and you finish it, okay?" He paused, waiting for a response for such a long time he doubted one would come. Finally, Reed nodded weakly. "Okay. This guy, he forced you to…"
All breathing instantaneously ceased as they all waited for Reed to say something. A long moment past in which not one of them spoke or even breathed.
Reed didn't move, keeping his head down as he whispered as quietly as he could manage in such a small miserable voice, hoping they wouldn't hear him, but knowing they would. "…have sex."
A collective exhaling of breath was heard, followed by Kurt's sobbing, Dwight loudly swearing, and Wes punching a wall, cracking the surface.
Shane's heart plummeted to the bottom of his feet. He had to grab onto Kurt's bed to keep from falling over. The pain in his stomach increased and he felt like vomiting. This wasn't real. This wasn't real. This wasn't real.
This kind of thing didn't happen to people he knew, let alone loved! This couldn't have happened to Reed, his Reed, of all people. There was no way. But Reed was now wailing, shaking hard and Shane could tell this was no joke.
Everything that happened the last two days was suddenly flashing in his head. Reed's illness; his mysterious injuries; the bruise on his cheek; his reluctance to be touched; his blatant lying; his nightmare; his inexplicable crying spells; the way he grabbed onto Shane, making him promise not to let go; his fear; the way he cried out "no" during class; his unpredictable behavior; his limping, oh god his limping. It all fit. Everything made sense now, but he couldn't believe it.
Once again his brother's voice pulled him out of his horror. "Reed," he sounded stern as he ran a hand over Kurt's back. "That is not sex, that is rape."
There it was. The word he was forcing himself not to think. The word that could not have happened to Reed. But it did. He could tell by the way Reed cried and quaked.
His legs were shaking harder but he managed to gain his balance, and he was soon running, tearing open the door and vanishing into the hallway.
Everyone, in varying degrees of shock and anger, stared at the door after him, dumbfounded. Wes had yet to turn back around to the direction of the group, and was still facing the wall he damaged, clenched fists shaking. David had shifted back into a standing position, staring ahead blankly and trying very hard not to explode, bombarding Reed was questions. Dwight's face was set in stone so tightly no one would have been able to guess the internal battle of anguish and rage. The twins were feeling oddly collected, exchanging knowing glances with each other. There wasn't an ounce of mischief in there system and their faces showed it. They were remembering a while back, what they did to that boy who made Reed cry, how they dumped him on the sidewalk in nothing but his underwear. If they ever found out who did this, and they intended to, it wouldn't be his clothes that would be shed, it would be his blood.
Blaine was still comforting a weeping Kurt, but the second Shane stormed out, his head snapped up. He saw Reed finally take a peek out from behind his arm, looking up to glance around frantically to see who left. His face twisted in pain when he found it was exactly who he feared. Right now he didn't care how anyone else reacted, he was only scared about what Shane would say, what he would do. And he left. He started to break back down. Shane didn't want to have anything else to do with him. This is what he was afraid of.
Blaine saw the break down coming. He jumped up, racing after his brother and slamming the door behind him.
He spotted him, pacing in the hallway, not three feet from the door.
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Blaine shouted, not caring if people would hear.
Shane wasn't facing him, he was running his hands over his head, pulling at his hair desperately. When he turned to look at Blaine, Blaine could see his cheeks were wet with tears he didn't try to stop.
"How did this happen?" he brokenly gasped, watching Blaine with a heartbreaking expression. He was suddenly looking furious, "How did this happen!" He repeated, punching the wall before breaking back down into another fit of sobs.
Blaine's anger dulled. He knew Shane was at war with himself. He knew how it felt.
"I don't know. But why are you out here, screaming about it?"
Shane turned angry once more. He gestured frantically to the staircase. "I have to find, kill, him."
He wasn't making a whole lot of sense, but Blaine still understood completely. "And how do you plan on doing that when you don't even know who it is?"
Blaine was being far too calm. Why wasn't he raging! How could he just stand there and ask stupid questions after what just happened! "I don't fucking care! I'll just… I'll..." He screamed, punching the wall again before sliding down it, burying his head in his hands and crying.
Blaine sighed, walking over to him. "I know how you feel."
He dropped his hands but his eyes remained on the floor. "No you don't," He managed to choke out, "You have no idea."
"Don't you think I felt the exact same way when I found out? Don't you think I wanted to murder the guy who did it?"
Shane realized something then, something that should have clicked earlier but never found its way into his shocked frozen mind.
"You knew." He whispered, his inquiry quiet at first. When Blaine only shifted, not answering, Shane was shouting, jumping back up, and advancing on his brother menacingly. "You knew! You knew this whole time and you didn't me!" Blaine swallowed, shuffling guiltily. "How could you!"
Finally looking up, Blaine spoke quietly. "It wasn't for me to tell. It was his secret and he begged me not to say anything. And I didn't want to force him to do anything, not with what just happened to him. All the websites said it had to be his choice."
"I don't care!" Shane was screaming in his face and Blaine did nothing to stop him. "You still should have told me! Or someone! How could you not make him go to the hospital or police, he could be seriously hurt and that goddamn son of a bitch is still walking around freely!" He paused, taking a shuttering breath. "How could you keep this from me? I'm his boyfriend," his eyes were filling up again. "I'm supposed to protect him! And he was violated in the worst possible way. And I didn't even know!"
He was crying again, trying very hard not break into sobs, and Blaine put a gentle hand on his shoulder. "I know –"
"No you don't know!" He shouted, stepping back and away. "Kurt is fine! He wasn't the one who was r-raped." His heart clenched at the word he could barely bring himself to say. He still couldn't comprehend how it happened to Reed.
Everyone in the room was tensed, not daring to say a word. They were all pretending they couldn't hear the brothers' fight, even though they were loud and quite easily heard.
As soon as Blaine left Kurt had jumped off the bed, scurrying over to where Reed was huddled, crying on the floor. He now had his arms wrapped around him, trying his best to rub his back and comfort him. Reed was bawling, clutching onto Kurt's shirt tightly as Kurt rocked him. He could hear Shane shouting too, and that and the fact he ran out was all Reed needed to know it was true.
"He hates me," Reed managed between sobs.
That broke Kurt's heart even more. "Shhhh," he whispered, trying to hold his tears in. "No, he doesn't. He's just in shock."
They all were.
Blaine's stomach knotted up with guilt. He watched his brother cry with sympathy. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I wanted to. I wanted to so badly. You deserved to know. But I was scared. And he was too. He was terrified you'd hate him once you found out, that you'd think he wanted it."
Shane sniffed, glancing up at his brother, shock in his misty eyes. "He what? How could he think that? I would never blame him."
"I know that. But he doesn't." Blaine sighed when Shane stared at his feet again, silently crying. "Do you know what the first thing I did when I found out was? Educate myself." Shane glanced up. "I didn't try to beat anyone's head in, even though I really wanted to. Now, Reed is in there, crying his eyes out, scared and hurt, thinking you hate him. He needs you. Take care of him."
Shane nodded, lips quivering as more tears fell. He shoved passed Blaine, cursing himself for being so stupid, running to the door they were only a couple feet away from and rushing into the room.
Everyone stared up in surprise the moment he entered, including Reed who could barely see which brother it was due to his blurry vision.
Kurt got up, stepping back and meeting Blaine at the doorway.
Shane walked to where Reed was numbly, weakly collapsing onto his knees as soon as he was in front of him.
"Reed…"
Reed shook with nerves and terror, petrified of what Shane would say next. He said nothing though, instead grabbing onto him and holding him against him tightly, running a hand through his hair and whispering softly, "It's okay. I love you. I always have and always will. Nothing is going to change that, especially this. I love you."
Reed sobbed, unable to believe him. Like Kurt said, Shane was in shock, he didn't know what he was saying, he didn't realize what it meant. "I didn't want to!" He cried, desperate to make Shane understand. "I swear I didn't! I would never!"
Shane's body shook as he tried to conceal his own crying, "Shhh baby, I know."
"I said no. I t-tried to..." Reed trailed off, gasping, "He m-made me."
Even though the words broke Shane's heart even further, he was starting to see red. He couldn't get the images of it out of his mind, of Reed being hurt like this, of some fucking bastard hurting him like this. What he wouldn't give to beat the life out of this person with his bare hands.
"I know," he repeated and his voice was filled with all the emotions he didn't dare let Reed see him express. "It's not your fault. Shhhh. It's not your fault."
Reed didn't try to talk anymore, sobbing opening into Shane's shirt. Shane only held onto him tightly, never wanting to let go. He was still mortified. He would have never believed it. He remembered thinking Reed was cheating on him, and now he could see that would have been so much better than this. Sure that hurt, but this made him want to die. And kill.
And with that thought, he was remembering something he needed to ask. He had to. Even if it meant upsetting Reed.
"Reed," he whispered, trying to keep the anger out of his voice as he pulled away gently to look into his swimming eyes. "Who did this to you?"