A/N: Friendly neighborhood reminder that fanfic authors do this for fun, and leaving snotty anonymous reviews about the gaps in updates only makes an author regret coming back to a story. I've both apologized for and explained why the last last chapter took so long, and I'm happy to discuss those reasons further if you wish to PM me. For the rest of you, I hope this prompt update also serves as an added apology.
Thanks again to Katherine (The-KLF) for the last chapter, and to Jo (honeyandvodka) for being such a wonderful beta.
Castle and Gina stared at one another in disbelief, before taking off at a run towards the lobby. A few people were peeking out of their office doors, but the vast majority were doing what any born and bred New Yorker would do at the sound of a gunshot so nearby- they were taking cover.
Castle's heart was pounding as he beat Gina around the bend in the corridor. He heard her stop short at the sight before them, and even though it tore his heart out, too many years shadowing the NYPD had him automatically stepping into action.
"Call an ambulance!" he threw over his shoulder.
There was no sign of the gunman. Whoever was responsible for this was most likely in one of the nearby offices, or had somehow managed a quick escape.
The victim, however, was not so lucky. Castle didn't recognize her initially- not until he dropped to his knees beside her to assess the damage. When he did, it was all he could do to not throw up.
Amanda.
Amanda, the sweet, fun intern with whom he had shared jokes in the meeting he had just stepped out of. It had only been five minutes since she had left the conference room. Alive.
His first instinct was to stop the bleeding, but one look at her unblinking stare had him reaching for her pulse with one hand, even as he applied pressure to the wound.
There was so much blood.
The image of another body flashed in his mind's eye- a body belonging to someone much dearer, losing the battle to stay conscious as her blood spilled out onto grass, the sky too blue that day.
Behind him, he could hear Gina giving Black Pawn's address in the clipped, direct tone she used when she was under pressure.
No pulse.
She was gone.
He hung his head for a long moment, fighting back the tears that now threatened. He took his time glancing back to Gina, noticing now people's heads popping out of office doors, the crowd of gawkers now feeling safe enough to satisfy their curiosity.
Finally, he met Gina's eyes. He could tell that she knew already, just from his body language. She looked ready to crumple, but he knew she would push through. He had been married to her once, after all.
"Tell them we don't need an ambulance. Request a homicide team instead," he instructed gently, before standing up and raising his voice. "Listen up! I need everyone out of their offices now."
It took a moment for them to comply. One or two were already crying, and there was a low murmur, but Castle took charge. "All of you need to go wait in the conference rooms until the police come. I know this will be hard on you all, but you need to not talk about it with each other until an officer can take your statement. Any small detail you can remember may be helpful, and we don't want those details becoming confused. It's all we can do to help her now-finding who did this. Do you have fire wardens? Maybe they could check through all the rooms, make sure everyone is accounted for? Go in pairs, though." A couple of people nodded and moved away as instructed. He turned to Gina, who was just getting off the phone. "If you take Conference Room A, you'll be able to keep them calm and actually see the police when they arrive. I'll go down to B with the rest of them. It might be good to distribute paper and get them to write down what they remember?" he added quietly.
Gina nodded, and began shepherding her colleagues towards the two large rooms, her natural gift of leadership causing even senior partners to do her bidding.
Castle followed the remaining employees down to the room he had only exited minutes before- only shortly after Amanda herself had exited.
He was painfully aware of her blood on his hands and clothes, but didn't want to clean them off just yet, just in case there was any useful evidence to be found on them. It would depend on the detectives running the investigation, of course, but he knew that he would fall under suspicion just like everyone else in the building.
He could feel the tension in the atmosphere as he entered the room. Several were still crying, several more were clearly in shock. Many were looking at each other helplessly, desperate to speak in order to process their horror.
"Could someone find everyone some paper, and then if you all write down everything you remember, it should be okay to speak after that. Thank you so much, all of you, for your cooperation on that front," he said.
Almost everyone nodded, and some even looked relieved. Someone looked in a storage cupboard and found a spare ream of photocopying paper. It was quickly distributed, and soon people were taking turns with the few pens in the room. Those waiting milled about restlessly, but as people were given the chance to express themselves, he felt everyone begin to relax.
It wasn't much later that he heard the elevator arrive, and saw Gina stepping out of the other room down the corridor to head into the lobby. After a couple of minutes, a pair of uniforms came in.
He didn't recognize either of them. He pushed down his disappointment- after all, of all the homicides cops in the city, did he really expect that his team from the Twelfth would land this case? He couldn't even remember if Black Pawn was located in the Twelfth's jurisdiction- although, come to think of it, if it wasn't, it wasn't far out of it.
Castle stepped up to greet them, explaining quietly how he had organized the potential witnesses. They thanked him, calling the room to attention and taking charge, summoning yet another uniform to join them, asking the newcomer to start with his statement as he was the one with literal blood on his hands.
Castle turned to look at the Uni he was being handed over to, only to come face to face with LT, who greeted him with- for him, anyway- a beaming smile, and ushered him out into the corridor.
Wait, did that mean- was it possible that Kate was here?
His mind went blank of all else at the thought.
Down the far end, outside the door to Conference Room A, Ryan and Esposito were talking to Gina, clearly taking her statement. All three stopped to look at him.
Castle offered them a nervous little wave, completely unsure of his reception. He couldn't help but think back to another case, years ago, and the way they had given him the cold shoulder at least initially upon his return.
A lot of water had passed under the bridge since then though. An awful lot.
Ryan squeezed Gina's arm sympathetically- Castle couldn't hear the words, but he knew well enough the sign of an offering of sympathy at the end of an initial interview. Both Detectives headed straight for him.
"Of course you're here when there's a murder," Esposito greeted him sternly, both of them puffing out their chests and crossing their arms practically in unison.
Typical intimidation tactics. He just wished he could tell whether the boys were seriously annoyed at him, or if they were just messing around. Knowing these two, it could go either way.
Surprisingly, it was LT who spoke, giving the Detectives a rundown of Castle's instructions and handling of the witnesses.
Esposito stuck out his lip and nodded, conceding a point to Castle. "Nice work, bro," he said, although his body language didn't relax.
"Yeah. What'd you do, run around with a bunch of cops for a while or something?" Ryan added, nodding his head at LT to allow the larger man to carry on with his duty. Castle took a deep breath, knowing they wouldn't mess with him if they were really mad.
"Wanna take us through what happened?" Esposito asked, getting down to business.
He did his best to recount the story with as much detail as possible, but with few embellishments. He couldn't help but mentally shake his head at how much he'd changed over the past few years, sliding into his role of civilian consultant naturally, trying to be as useful as possible while keeping out of the way for now, knowing that this was what the boys needed from him.
Ryan and Esposito listened attentively, only interrupting to ask the occasional clarifying question. Both looked a little relieved as his narrative drew to a close. Castle understood why a moment later, as Ryan asked his final question.
"So you and Gina were both still in the conference room when the gunshot sounded?"
Castle had already answered that, but he pointed through the glass wall panel to the conference room. "We were both standing right there, talking."
"Good. Good. Excellent," Ryan muttered, making a notation in his notebook. Although he couldn't see the page, he knew from experience that Ryan had a little scrawled shorthand symbol for "alibi checks out."
"What've we got, Lanie?" a familiar voice echoed faintly down the corridor, and although he couldn't see the lobby from this far down the hall and there were other voices producing a quiet murmur of background noise, Castle felt his entire world stop short.
He would know that voice anywhere.
Any relief or joy he had felt at seeing Ryan and Esposito and at not having to explain his story to cops he didn't know vanished at the sound of her voice. That beautiful, no nonsense voice that had the power to turn him inside out and reduce him to a stuttering mess. That voice he hadn't heard for all these long weeks. That voice he missed down to his very soul.
That voice he loved.
He lifted a hand to fix his hair a little, but stopped at the sight of the blood still encrusted on it, realizing fully for the first time that his new suit was ruined. He turned panicked eyes to Ryan, knowing from experience that he was the more sympathetic of the two.
"I didn't clean up just in case I got evidence on me," he said urgently, eyes darting around wildly.
"You did the right thing, bro. We should ask Lanie about that," Ryan soothed. Esposito elbowed him.
"Kate's out there, man. If it was Jenny, would you want her seeing you again looking like that?" he hissed.
Castle glared at him.
"Right... right. What do we do?" Ryan asked his partner, some of Castle's panic infecting him.
Esposito shook his head contemptuously. "You two stay here. I'll go talk to Lanie- and Beckett."
Castle slammed his eyes shut at her name.
Before Esposito could turn to go, though, the sound of heels on the floor at a familiar gait echoed down the corridor.
"What've we got, Es-" her voice cut off abruptly as the three of them swung around to face her with matching expressions of guilt.
Castle felt all the air whoosh out of his lungs as his eyes met hers.
Her face was paler than her remembered, her figure slimmer, as if she hadn't been eating so well. Her hair was hanging in natural waves around her face, a little longer than he remembered. Her expression of surprise must surely have matched his own.
So beautiful.
He cleared his throat, but no words would form.
Finally, she broke eye contact, her gaze flickering over to the boys, who were watching them both as if they were spectators at a sporting event.
"What've we got?" To her credit, her voice barely wavered, her glare penetrating.
Stuttering, the boys recounted their information as quickly as possible, emphasizing Castle's quick reaction in organizing the witnesses. She listened silently, mouth pursed into a thin line, waiting until they finished before she spoke.
"Great work, guys. I'll get you to stay here and finish up coordinating witness statements, and I'll head back to the precinct and get the ball rolling. Mr. Castle," she addressed him formally, "If it's not inconvenient, I'd appreciate it if you and Ms. Cowell would come down to the station and give your statements there, as you were the first on the scene. We'll also need to take your clothes in for evidence."
"Anything I can do, Kate," he replied softly.
Her eyes flickered, then dropped away. "Get it done," she murmured to her colleagues, before turning on her heel and heading back towards the crime scene.
Castle followed her with his eyes in same way a starving man watches a feast, taking note of the tense way she carried herself as she moved away from him. Something nagged at his brain as he watched her- something was different- but he couldn't place it, so he batted the thought away.
All he knew for sure was that he was nowhere close to even beginning to get over her.
In the end, Ryan and Esposito grudgingly agreed to give Castle and Gina a ride to the precinct. They kept their attitude to a minimum, though, out of deference to Gina, and for once Castle was thankful for his ex-wife's presence. The attitude may be all in jest, but there was still a corner of him that couldn't help but tremble when left to the boys' mercy without Beckett there to tell them to back off.
Once they arrived at the station, the two Detectives ushered Gina into an interview room to formally take her statement. They asked Castle to wait in the break room.
It felt so strange to be back. On the one hand, nothing major had changed- sure, there were a few small differences here and there, but the precinct was still the precinct. On the other hand, everything was different.
Beckett was busy writing up the murder board, and had completely ignored them as he went past, but he noticed Esposito stopping to talk to her and nodding towards the break room.
Castle leaned awkwardly against the bench, watching the hustle and bustle of precinct life from between the blinds. He considered making himself a coffee, but he hadn't had a chance to clean up yet, and didn't want to mess around with potential evidence on his clothes any more than necessary.
Turns out he didn't have to wait all that long.
Beckett cleared her throat in the doorway, looking like she'd rather be anywhere else.
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Hey! One of the guys from CSU is here for your clothes. You, um, you actually left a spare set in my locker from, well, you know. Anyway, here you go, and Brendan here has evidence bags for what you're wearing, if you don't mind changing?" She awkwardly held out some familiar looking clothes.
He stepped forward to take them from her, carefully avoiding making direct physical contact. She already looked like she was going to bolt.
"Hey," he said softly, waiting for her to raise her eyes to meet his before he continued. "Thank you for these."
She gave him a fleeting smile and turned to go.
"Kate," he called before he could stop himself. She paused. "You look good," was all he was able to articulate.
Over her shoulder, she sent him another sad, fleeting smile, and headed back to her desk.
A sandy-headed, bespeckled young man was hovering just out of the door with evidence bags. Castle went with him to the men's locker room, patiently allowing him to carefully swab his hands before allowing him to change, bagging and labeling everything as he went. Once he had everything he needed, he left Castle to finish cleaning up alone.
It was a relief to finally wash Amanda's blood off his hands, yet at the same time, a part of him was sad. He had only known the girl so briefly. He wondered about her life, her family. Did she have a father back home somewhere about to be devastated by the loss of his child?
He shook his head, refusing to let his thoughts go down that path.
Upon returning to the bull pen, he hovered automatically near Kate's desk. He could see her through the blinds talking to Gates in her office, and both women glanced out at him as he stood there. He was just debating whether he was still allowed to sit in his old chair when the telltale rhythm of Captain Gates' heels sounded behind him. He turned as she approached, Kate hovering several steps back in the doorway of Gate's office.
"Mr. Castle, it was good of you to come in. I believe Interrogation Two is available for me to take your statement," the Captain announced in her usual crisp, no nonsense way.
He couldn't help but dart his eyes back over to Kate, who was clearly listening, but equally clearly avoiding eye contact. "You, Sir?" he squeaked, "I thought..."
"Under the circumstances, it's probably for the best, don't you think?" Gates asked with just a hint of understanding in her tone.
He nodded, his eyes straying back over to his par... former partner for a lingering moment, before following Gates to the interrogation room.
The Captain was extremely efficient as she took his statement, going over his words again and again, asking questions in different ways to help jog his memory. It was tedious and frustrating, but he knew the system and understood why she needed to be so thorough. He was as open and honest as he could be, and eventually the Captain was satisfied, leaning back in her chair as he signed his statement.
He plucked up his courage as she was gathering her things. "Uh... Sir? If you don't mind me asking... how's Beckett doing?" he asked quietly, well aware that anyone, including the subject of his inquiry, could be standing on the other side of the glass.
Gates straightened, mulling his question over in her mind for a moment before looking at him with something bordering on compassion. "It hasn't been an easy road for her, but I can assure you she's doing well," she replied carefully. "I'm sorry I can't be more specific than that, but I'm sure you'd agree that it isn't really my place to comment further."
She hesitated, as if she was going to say more, then shook her head slightly, pursing her lips together. He nodded, looking down at his hands. She moved to leave when he stopped her with another question.
"Sir, would it be ok for me to stick around for a while? Maybe see if I can help this investigation? It's kind of personal, for a lot of reasons," he added, hoping his desperation didn't show through too pathetically.
She looked back at him, weighing her options, then sighed. "In my opinion, you've proved yourself, Mr. Castle. I have no objection in theory, but I'll leave that decision up to the lead detective. She's the one who would have to put up with you, after all. Mind you, if she doesn't want you here, you need to respect that. No meddling," she warned.
He held up his hands innocently. "You have my word. Scout's honor!"
She raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "Hmmm," was all she said as exited the room.
The boys were at their desks, busily chasing up leads over the phone, and there was no sign of Gina. She was probably long gone, not that he cared particularly at this point. He was thankful Gina was unharmed, and part of him would always care about her, but the last thing he needed right now was his ex-wife waiting to share a cab with him when he was trying to talk his way into sticking around.
Beckett was staring at the still all-too-blank murder board, tapping a whiteboard marker against her chin, a little crease between her eyebrows, wrapped in thought.
Adorable.
He approached her slowly, trying to respect her space and not interrupt her cogitations. It didn't help that his palms were sweating, and he had no idea what he would do if she denied his request.
"Yo, Beckett," Espo's voice cut across the room from his desk. Her eyes darted up and around, visibly startling she saw him hovering a few feet away.
"Castle, what are you doing here?" she asked, emotions chasing each other across her face in such rapid succession he couldn't get a read on her.
"I, uh, was wondering if you would be open to letting me help with this one? Captain Gates said I could so long as it's okay with you," he added in a rush.
She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, evidently lost for words.
"Castle..." she began, but seemed to flounder as far as what to say next.
"I understand if you don't want me here. Believe me, I do, but this one's personal. Please, Kate? One case and I'll be out of your hair."
She sighed, and closed her eyes.
He was filled with the urge to step forward and wrap his arms around her, but he had a feeling that it wouldn't actually help her in this moment.
When she opened her eyes, though, she was all steel Beckett, no traces of soft Kate anywhere to be seen. "Fine," she ground out. "One case. That's it, Castle, and you stay out of my way while you're here."
He tried not to let it show that her words socked him in the guts, but the truth was, it hurt. Then again, it hurt to look at her and remember everything he'd lost and be sure once again of how in love with her he was always going to be.
Esposito had been hovering throughout this exchange, evidently waiting on Kate's go ahead before saying anything more about the case in front of Castle.
"We tracked down our vic's parents- they live in Chicago. Amanda moved here for college and got an internship with Black Pawn. Her mom was able to give us details for her roommate and her boyfriend."
Espo handed his notes over to Beckett, who nodded.
"See if you and Ryan can track down the boyfriend? I'll try the roommate," Kate instructed, jotting down the roommate's details before handing the information back to Esposito, who nodded and headed off, calling to his partner on the way. Kate settled herself at the desk, preparing herself to call the roommate. Castle gestured to her empty mug.
"Coffee?" he mouthed. She glanced up at him, her expression almost guilty. However, she didn't answer, merely opened her top drawer and handed him a peppermint teabag, before turning her attention back to her phone call. He raised his eyebrows. Apparently he wasn't the only one who didn't care for the taste of coffee any more. He snagged the teabag and headed into the break room, using the second half of her teabag to make himself a cup. It was a little weaker than he would usually prefer, but it was the first hot beverage he had shared with Kate Beckett in months, and that was worth sacrificing a little flavor in his mind.
He took his time with his preparations, knowing how much she despised the job of breaking the news to friends and family and how much she appreciated not being interrupted. He watched her surreptitiously through the blinds, admiring her gentle grace and genuine empathy as she spoke over the phone.
He waited until she moved to hang up the receiver before heading back over to her desk, carefully placing her mug before her as he took his seat at her side.
Home.
"How did it go?" he asked gently. She was staring at the mug in front of her, eyebrows drawn together into a frown. It took her a few moment to lift her eyes to meet his, and when she did, she seemed almost surprised to find him next to her.
He wondered if she was experiencing the same déjà vu as he was.
She recovered quickly, though.
"Roommate's name is Sierra Jackson. She's doing her graduate degree at NYU, and was in class when I called. She says she can be here in just over an hour, hopefully."
"So what's our next move?" Castle asked, settling himself down into his chair and slipping easily back into his role of her shadow.
Ryan called in as soon as he and Espo were done talking to the boyfriend, who, it turns out, worked not too far away. Karpowski's team had just been called away to a body drop, so the bullpen was quiet enough for Beckett to put her phone on speaker. Castle did his best to not lean too closely into her personal space, though, much as he wanted to. Her scent- subtle, fruity, and heady, was just about enough to make him want to do something stupid like kiss her.
He had missed that smell. Her old shirt had lost its traces of her a few weeks ago.
"The boyfriend's name is Diego Rodriguez, he's a sous chef at that new restaurant, Zebu. Saw our vic this morning before work, but has no idea about her having anyone out to get her. Said she'd been a little stressed with her internship, and working long hours, but nothing out of the ordinary."
"Great work, guys. Come on back in," Kate said, hanging up the phone. She then picked up the whiteboard marker and began adding the relevant information to the time line.
There were still far too many blank spaces, though.
Sierra Jackson arrived about two minutes before the boys got back, and Beckett elected to have her shown through to one of the interview rooms. She and the boys exchanged notes, and then she turned to Espo.
"You're with me," she said firmly, and Castle knew her tone was directed at him. He opened his mouth to protest, but her mouth was set in a hard line. He remembered his New Life Plan- that he was trying to be more, for her. If that meant standing aside to let Espo take an interview with her, he could do that.
Ryan half punched his shoulder. "We'll watch from observation. Come on," he said, leading the way.
Castle followed, his heart thrilling at the thought of getting to watch Kate Beckett at work once again.
Perhaps the observation room really was the better option.
Sierra Jackson was of African-American heritage, slightly shorter than average, with a round, friendly, face and bright eyes hidden behind stylish glasses. She was dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt, and had obviously been crying. Castle felt his heart go out to her. Both this girl and Amanda could easily have been friends of Alexis.
"Thank you so much for coming in, Ms. Jackson," Beckett began gently. "I know this is really hard for you, so we appreciate you taking the time to come in and talk to us."
"Anything I can do," Sierra's voice rang with conviction, though her words were softly spoken.
"What we really need to know about is if there was anyone in Amanda's life who might have wanted to hurt her?" Kate asked.
Sierra hesitated.
"If there's anything you know, telling us could help us to catch the person responsible," Esposito said quietly.
"Amanda was seeing someone," Sierra said at length.
"You mean Diego? We've spoken to him," Beckett replied. Sierra looked up at her, her expression guilty.
"Not Diego. Someone from work," she said.
"Who?" Beckett asked.
Sierra twisted her fingers. "She wouldn't say. She's been with Diego for more than two years now. She felt so guilty about it for his sake. She's not really that kind of person- you have to know that. But this new guy just-he was rich, and he treated her like a princess, you know?"
Kate nodded sympathetically. "I get it, Sierra. Sometimes our friends make choices we don't agree with, but telling us about them won't make you a bad friend, I promise. The opposite, actually."
The girl nodded, taking a deep breath. "All I know about him is that he was some kind of hotshot writer who works with Black Pawn, and he'd been through a break up recently, so between that and Diego, they were happy to keep things on the quiet."
Castle couldn't see Beckett's face from where he was standing, but he definitely noticed the way her back stiffened as Sierra spoke.
Huh.
She must have caught something he didn't.
He'd been away far too long.
"How long had she been seeing this guy, do you know?" Beckett asked, not giving anything away to anyone who didn't know her as intimately as he did.
Had she always been this brilliant at her job?
He felt himself puff up with pride on her behalf.
"Just a few weeks- not more than a month. Diego had no idea, either. Did he tell you he was going to propose? He spoke to her father when he was in town just the other week. He was saving for a ring. Amanda was planning on breaking things off with this author, but she was worried about what would happen if anything went down at work."
"Was she expecting something bad to happen at work?" Beckett's voice was all sympathy.
Sierra took a deep breath and nodded. "Kind of. I know that one of the girls there- Lauren, maybe? She's the receptionist. I know she found out about the affair, and was giving Amanda a hard time about it. I think maybe she used to be involved with the guy, too? I don't know, Amanda didn't say much, but I know she was really upset about it."
Castle watched Kate lean back in her chair, obviously thinking things over, giving a subtle nod to Esposito to take over the questioning. Esposito took Sierra through the time line- details about this mystery man, and whether there was anything unusual about Amanda's behavior that morning. Eventually, they pronounced her free to go. Esposito walked her to the elevators while Beckett headed to the murder board, quickly filling in the new information.
Castle and Ryan took their time reentering the bull pen, chatting casually about the case and Jenny's rapidly advancing pregnancy.
Thus it was completely unexpected when Beckett rounded on him suddenly.
"Exactly how long have you been having an affair with Amanda Hartwell, Castle?" she demanded.
Thoughts?