Lesson Five: Running

"So, you're safe, correct? I hope you are comfortable," I run my fingers through my hair as I pull the cell phone slightly off my face.

"Yes, Sasuke, I'm fine. I won't be staying at Ino's for long. I'm already on the hunt for apartments."

"That's good to hear," I remain silent for a few seconds. It was eerie how casual the conversation was going, considering that it had only been a week since she had left me. "I'm surprised that this is going so...well, easily. For the both of us."

She remained silent for a few seconds, and then, a slight giggle escaped her. I could imagine her delicate fingers covering her mouth, "I am too. But I think that this was a long time coming, Sasuke."

"I...I guess," I sigh, looking down at the table I am sitting at. The breeze soothes my anxiety. It's refreshing to at least be sitting out here, alone, and away from the hustle and bustle of university students.

"I'll talk to you later, Sasuke, I have to go. I'll keep you updated. I know that it will make you feel more at ease."

"Okay, Sakura."

"Bye."

I wait for the click on the other line before flipping my phone shut. I look down at the test papers that I'm grading and sigh. At times, I wonder if I'm still making the right decisions. I created this solid plan of action for life, as if nothing would deter me from that path. Sometimes, you forget that regardless of what you plan life doesn't always stay on track the way that you would wish it did.

"Sasuke!"

I look up from the table and notice Naruto staring down at me. He pats me on the back aggressively and steals the top of the table as a seat. He's staring down at me intensely, a lot closer than I want him to be. I look around and notice students staring at us intently, mostly females, and feel a blush tint my cheeks.

"Hey, Naruto, people are staring. Move away. Now."

Slowly, I could see the mischievousness form onto Naruto's features. I pulled away, unsure of what may come next, and he only inched closer. And closer.

Too close.

There was only a centimetre of space between our noses, I could feel his breath against my skin, and he locked his brilliant blue eyes with mine, not looking away. Somehow, I couldn't step away from the challenge. I had forgotten about what was going on around us. There was only this moment, this challenge.

"Sasuke," he whispered softly.

"Yes, Naruto."

"People are watching."

I quickly pushed him away and sat upright, fixing myself to combat the anxiety and embarrassment. I cleared my throat, and looked away from him, hoping that he wouldn't notice the warmth that invaded my face. He burst out into a fit of wild laughter, it filled the air, and I could feel myself wanting to rip him apart limb from limb.

"Oh, come on," there was a growl like quality to the way he formed his words, "We should pander to our fans every once in a while."

"Oh, please, Naruto," I groaned, ignoring the watchful eyes, "This is an establishment for learning and growth not scandals and gossip."

"You're no fun," Naruto pouts, as he situates himself next to me on the bench. "But, seriously, how are you feeling after...well, you know."

"You know, I'm doing just fine," I look down at my unmarked test papers that I haven't even looked at yet. I couldn't even sum up the energy to start taking a look at them. It was a strange feeling, to be jaded at such an early age. I don't remember wanting to be the image of all that was dark and negative.

As if he knew what I was thinking, Naruto inched closer to me, his scent drifted into the air and it sent waves of nostalgia throughout me. Without thinking, I plopped my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes, and took in the scent that reminded me of a blissful time years ago before all this adulthood had taken over our simple pleasures.

"Sasuke..."

I opened my eyes, realizing what I had done, and my breathing became quick and vapid due to the immense nervousness that overcame me. What the hell was I doing?

I straightened quickly, adjusting my tie, and fixed the collar of my shirt.

"You're losing it," Naruto snickered before throwing his arm around me and pulling me in. Again, that nauseating scent of his began to make me feel sick.

"I must be," I sighed, feeling defeated. "I really must be."

"Hey! How about this? Forget about marking papers, and students, etc. boring stuff, and let's have a night out. Have a few drinks, banter, you know, that sort of thing."

I stood up from the bench and collected my papers, stuffing it in my bag quickly, "No, Naruto. We're not high school students anymore. We have responsibilities. We can't just ignore them because of hardships and misery."

"Geeze," Naruto grabs onto my arm, and we stare each other down. "You can't just keep running away."

"On the contrary," I pull my arm from his grip, "I'm doing the opposite of just that."

As I walk away, I can hear Naruto's breathing quicken over the sound of the wind that surrounds us.

"You'd like to think that, but you're always running away, Sasuke."

I stop for a moment, taking in his words. I remember that day during our senior year, the last day, when he grabbed me and my body reacted so outrageously. I wanted to forget that. I wanted to just forget him, and that the two of us were ever friends. It's strange though, almost funny, to think that after all those years I'm still affected by him just like that. Just like when we were teenagers, and I thought this was a foolish fleeting feeling.

I ask myself constantly who I am, and why I'm hiding. Who do I have left to fear? I guess, it isn't who, but what. I don't want to feel that way again, pain, it's just too much. I'd rather just...run away then.

"Actually, Naruto, you're right," and just with that I kept walking forward, away from him and everything I could ever have. I didn't need close friendships or love. I just needed myself, that's all. I didn't require marriage or company of any kind. What's the point of it all when, in the end, nothing good would come out of it?

"Naruto!" I could feel my knees weakening, my body trembling before him. So weak, I couldn't believe that I was so weak.

"Sasuke," he held me in his arms as I fell to the ground, tears threatening to escape me. "I'm here, it's okay. You can't let him keep doing this to you."

"I just..."

"No!" Naruto growled, "I can't just sit here and watch as he hurts you! I care about you too much, Sasuke!"

I look up at him, tears threatening to escape both of us as his arms are wrapped around me. I didn't think I could ever be so fragile around someone, so weak. It was disgusting. I pushed him off of me and got up to my feet. I swore never to allow anyone to witness my weakness again and here I was, groveling and shaking in his arms. His of all people's.

"Sasuke! You can't just keep running away!"

"Why?" I growl at him, pushing him further away from me. "It's what I'm best at!"

My eyes open, and I notice that I've fallen asleep in my office at the university. I was dreaming of the past, such a funny thing to dream of. That time, when he...

I hear someone knocking at my door and I fix myself up quickly.

"Come in," I sigh, not wanting any company at this moment. I just...

I shouldn't lie to myself. I don't know what the fuck I want anymore. How strange, that our lives can shift so quickly. Just a few weeks ago I thought everything in my life had been solidified, as if I had gained everything I had ever been seeking. But with all the success and changes, I just found myself more lost and confused than I ever had been before.

"Sasuke," I hear Naruto on the other side of the door. I groan in frustration, he's like a disease you can never quite rid yourself of.

"What do you want?"

The door opens and he walks in slowly, he's carrying a guitar case in one hand, and he looks contemplative, and unsure. He slowly steps into the room, and places his guitar on the ground, before sitting on the seat across from my desk. He looks nervous but I'm not quite sure why.

"I'm sorry about earlier," he sighs. "I know you're going through a tough time and I shouldn't force you do to things that you're not ready to do. I know you do things your way and..."

As he speaks, I can feel the dormant feelings of fear and resentment welling up inside of me, ready to explode. After all these years, after what I did, and said, why was he acting so nice to me? It was making me sick. Just sick.

I slammed my hands on the table, trembling from all the anger sweltering within me. Why? Why?! WHY?

"Why are you acting so fucking nice to me? After I left you, and said those things to you? What's wrong with you? Are you a masochist or something? What is wrong with you?"

I held Naruto's shoulders tightly with both of my hands. The two of us stood silently in the room. The sound of my breathing seemed to fill the entirety of it. My heaving was dreadful, and I didn't know what to do to stop myself, and calm down. I was just so...angry.

He stared up at me. He held sadness in his eyes that I hadn't seen in so long. Neither of us moved an inch. My hands were still gripped tightly onto him. He slowly raised one arm, his hand wrapping around my wrist. The contact of skin against skin sent a shiver throughout my body.

"I'm not a masochist, Sasuke, and I'm still hurt by what you did to this day," his grip tightened and his eyes blazed with an emotion I couldn't quite understand, "I just...I-"

"Ah!" The two of us look up towards the door to find one of my students standing in awe, watching us. "I didn't mean to interrupt but I wanted to discuss an extension for an assignment. I have some family issues and require a few extra days."

"That's fine," my arms fall to my side. "Take the time you need."

"Yes, th-thank you," she stutters before slowly backing away.

"I have some work to do, Naruto," I slump into my seat, as I cover my eyes with my hand.

And just like that, he doesn't speak another word. He leaves, and that's it.