TA DA! I wanted this to be called Paraba-bro time but it didn't seem to go with the rest of the chapter names, so i guess Alec makes smoothies will have to work. i hope you enjoy it! We attached a song we wrote at the end. Please R&R and the song is to the tune of 'Do You Wanna Build A Snowman?' so yeah...
ALEC MAKES SMOOTHIES
"Alec?" Magnus called cautiously from the hallway. In the kitchen you could hear angry noises of a blender furiously pureeing some poor banana.
"GO AWAY!" Alec yelled back over the noise of the blender. Magnus sighed, solving this would take more than glitter, Magnus's dashing good looks and several glasses of whiskey.
"Alec honey?" Magnus called again. The blending noises subsided to a mere mix and then stopped all together. Alec came storming up to Magnus.
"I have done so much, worked so hard on every freaking task they have given me and some how it always comes back to me being gay! And you!" Alec paused. Magnus gasped.
"Me? Why me?" He demanded.
"You try and shelter me just like Izzy, try and soften the blows but all I want is to make my smoothie so leave me be!" He screamed and stormed back to the kitchen. Magnus pursed his lips. Alec had been angry before. Alec had raged and ranted and even broken a lamp once but never, ever, had Magnus seen Alec so angry that a smoothie did not make it better. The angry blending sounds started up again and then slowed as, Magnus assumed, Alec added more fruit.
He peeked around the corner. Alec was sitting cross-legged on the floor in the center of the kitchen with the blender in front of him. Magnus bit his lip and looked on as Alec glared at the blender with a hatred that would've given Valentine a run for his money. Suddenly Alec shot to his feet, stormed over to the cupboard and spun around. Magnus's eyes locked onto Alec's.
"Do you want some smoothie?" Alec demanded through gritted teeth. Magnus, afraid to say no, nodded unsurely. Alec grabbed two glasses and proceeded to fill them with the smoothie mixture. Magnus cautiously took the glass from Alec and sipped it. Alec stared on, glaring at Magnus as if he was invisible and the wallpaper behind him was about to die. (Which if Magnus had any say in it, which of course he did, would be gone before the morrow.)
"Alec do you want to talk about?" Magnus asked. Alec ignored him, sipped and then said.
"I wonder if Jace wants some smoothie." Magnus breathed a sigh of relief, he seemed fine, thank the angel. Alec pulled out his phone.
"Jace."
"Alec."
"Want some smoothie?"
"Some Shadowhunter Smoothie?" Jace replied, his voice silky smooth.
"Bring Parabatai Pancakes. I need some Paraba-bro time."
"On it. I'll be there in twenty." Alec flipped his phone shut, turned around and went back to the fridge. He opened it, scavenged for some more fruit and returned to the blender that Magnus now associated with unhappiness.
"I'll be in our room." He said slowly, realizing his was still gingerly sipping on the smoothie. Alec nodded and continued maiming more fruit.
~TWENTY MINUTES ON THE DOT LATER~
"PARABATAI PANCAKES!" Jace shouted as Alec flung open the door.
"SHADOWHUNTER SMOOTHIE!" Alec returned, letting out his less controlled side for the first time in a while.
"Turn on Project Runway, let's do this." Alec flopped onto the couch, flicked on the television and began their TV show binge. They sat there on the couch slumping heavily and stuffing their faces with pancakes and smoothie. The two clinked glasses as a new episode began.
"Oh dammit! I thought she went home!" Jace cried, throwing a hand exasperatedly into the air. Alec shook his head.
"No, no, she stayed but that one guy went home." Alec replied.
"Oh yeah." Magnus appeared from the hallway, he was glaring at Jace.
"You get smoothie or syrup on that couch and I will feed you to Chairman Meow." He growled, behind him the cat hissed angrily.
"You can magic it out anyways." Jace said.
"Yes but I get lazy and really prefer to indulge my more homicidal side." Jace just rolled his eyes and returned his gaze to the TV. Magnus slunk away back to his room, thinking of when Alec first got addicted to anger management through smoothie.
~SIX WEEKS PERVIOUS~
"Alec darling, I'm sure it will be fine." Magnus sighed, dragging him out to the kitchen. "Would you like something to eat?" He drawled. Alec nodded carelessly and continued ranting.
"Raziel! She can be so infuriating! It's like one minute she's the world's greatest sister and the next she can't stand to be around me!" Alec shouted. Magnus went into the kitchen deciding that it would be easier if he made a smoothie, then the blender could drown out the complaining. He pulled out an old looking blender and dusted it off, barely listening to the rant that Alec had already given. He plugged it in, magic-ed some fruit, juice and yogurt into the pitcher then pressed puree. The blender made a god-awful screeching noise and then started to grind up the fruit.
Magnus didn't realize it till after he stopped the blender but Alec's rant had stopped and the Shadowhunter was staring at the blender as if in a trance.
"Alec?" Magnus asked.
"What is that thing?"
"What this? It's a blender, you should know that." Magnus then remembered that his mother is Maryse Lightwood and she nor Isabelle were known for their cooking abilities much less maintaining a well-stocked kitchen.
"I want to try." Alec breathed. Magnus furrowed his brow and then let Alec race over and start to furiously push buttons, listening to the deafening grinding noise seemed to be making him relax.
"Alec?" Magnus said once more. Alec looked up. "Are you okay darling?" Magnus continued slowly. Alec nodded.
"I have never needed this more." He whispered. Magnus smirked, kissed Alec and flopped down on the couch.
~PRESENT~
Jace looked over at Alec.
"Do you think he was being serious? Do you think he'd actually figure out a way to feed me to the Chairman?" Jace asked. Alec shrugged.
"I dunno, he's mysterious that way." He replied. Jace looked over at him.
"How mysterious, Alec? How mysterious?" Bother their eyes widened.
"Mysterious as the dark side of the moon." Alec said back, almost sounding excited.
"Be a man." Jace said.
"With all the force,"
"The force of a great typhoon. Be a man." The two leapt up.
"WITH ALL THE STRENGTH OF A RAGING FIRE!" They bellowed. Jace looked over, snatched up a Wii remote and gripped it, holding it to his mouth.
"You're a spineless, pale, pathetic lot. And you haven't got a clue. Somehow I'll make a man out of you." Jace sang. Alec smiled and swiped the Wii remote. He ran, racing toward his and Magnus's room, and then slid down on his knees. He came to a stop in front of the doorway. Magnus looked up, surprised, and stared at Alec. Jace appeared behind Alec with a new Wii remote.
"We must be swift as a coursing river," Alec paused, letting Jace come in.
"Be a man."
"With all the force of a great typhoon,"
"Be a man."
"With all the strength of a raging fire." Jace grabbed Alec's hand and pulled him up. The two struck a pose.
"MYSTERIOUS AS THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON!" They sang. Jace dropped to his knees.
"Hoo-ah!" He shouted. Magnus gave them a look.
"Are you two okay? You better not be snorting anything, I will not get arrested for him." Magnus declared, pointing at his boyfriend's parabatai.
"Admittedly, I may have spiked the smoothies." Alec said, still holding his pose and smile.
Jace and Alec returned to the kitchen, excitedly pulling out the blender for more smoothies. Jace turned to Alec.
"We should call Clary and Izzy." He suggested. Alec nodded.
"Do it! I'll make more smoothie." He said, grabbing fruit from the freezer. In the corner Jace was humming 'A Girl Worth Fighting For' while waiting for Clary to pick up. Suddenly the blending stopped. Jace looked over at Alec.
"What's wrong?" He asked. Alec's eyes were panicked.
"I can't make smoothies unless I'm angry! This tastes awful!" Alec shouted, horrified. Jace's eyes widened. Suddenly Magnus was there.
"Stand back Shadowhunter, I've got this. Now Alec baby, don't hate me for this, I'm saving your smoothies right now." Alec nodded. "Your fighting is terrible, the Clave will undoubtedly never respect you and your sister can be such a brat." Alec's lips thinned and he grabbed his blender.
"Thank. You. Magnus." He said through gritted teeth.
"YAY MAGNUS!" Jace said, returning to his phone.
...
"We're saved!"
"Clary! Come on, it's Shadowhunter Smoothies at Magnus's!"
"Sha-la-la-la-la-la, do what the music say, you wanna kiss the girl. YOU"VE GOT TO KISS THE GIRL!"
"Magnus?!"
"What?!"
DO YOU WANNA MAKE A SMOOTHIE:
Magnus?
(Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock, knock)
Do you wanna make a smoothie?
Come on lets get some fruit
I can't find the bender anywhere
Come out the door
It's like it's gone away-
It used to be in the pantry
And now it's not
I wish you would tell me why!-
Do you wanna make a smoothie?
It doesn't have to banana.
Magnus:
Good I hate banana
Alec:
Okay, fine...
(Knocking)
Do you wanna make a smoothie?
We can throw mangoes in it
I think some help is overdue
I've started breaking things
and now your cat is pissed
(Hang in there, Alec!)
It gets a little creepy
Those big yellow eyes
glaring across the room,
(Hiss hiss hiss hiss hiss spit)
(Orchestral)
Magnus:
(CRASH)
Alec?
Please, I know you're out there,
I'm starting to worry about you
You said you're making smoothies
But it sounds more like a civil war
We only have one blender
Just that single one
What happens if that breaks?
Alec:
Do you wanna make a smoothie?
So... what do you think? Tell us in the comments! Thanks to everyone for leaving reviews, you guys rock! Next ones are probably gonna be some Jem and Will Paraba-bro time and maybe a Sophie/Gideon cuz we ship them soooooo hard. (Sorry there hasn't been any infernal devices one, my BFF, and account sharer, didn't start the series till recently!) THANKS AGAIN!