Gaea entered the dwarf's shop just as Nanna was packing up her things to put away for the night. She greeted her grandmother enthusiastically and dragged her over to show off her latest project. Gaea took her time to inspect it before offering her opinion; Nanna was so sensitive with her crafts; she always rushed into things headfirst and got discouraged when they didn't turn out as beautiful to other people as they were to herself.

"That is a beautiful bird," Gaea praised.

Nanna beamed. "You're the first one to know what it is! Syn thought it was a donkey."

Gaea smiled. "The wings are recognisable." Even if very little else is...

Nanna's grin widened.

"You'll have to work on it more tomorrow," Eitri suggested. "With a clearer head. Shape the tail more."

Nanna started to nod, but then shook her head. "I can't. I'm... I'm getting married in two days. I need to make sure my wedding stuff is all ready. Last minute fittings and all that."

"Yes. Of course. I forgot." Eitri smiled gently.

"Will you come?"

"No. Brokk isn't well enough to attend or to be left alone and your mother needs to be there. Don't worry for me, Nanna. Right now you'd best get home or your mother will worry."

"Will you come with me, see Brokk?"

Eitri hesitated.

"You should," Nanna pressed. "It's only nine days left."

Eitri turned away abruptly. "You'd better go."

"Eitri..." Nanna wished she knew what to say.

Gaea put a gentle hand on Nanna's shoulder, propelling her to the door. With a sigh the young blonde left the building. Eitri busied himself with putting away supplies and tools, pretending that he didn't notice that the Elder Goddess was still standing there. Gaea, for her part, watched the dwarf with sadness; she knew all too well what it was like to lose the people you loved.

"I had a brother that I was very close to once," she said softly. "He was younger than I was, but he was my world. I would have done anything to protect him. I lost him."

Eitri paused.

"Even though I know that there was nothing I could have done, I still wonder if maybe, had I been smarter or braver... But the fact is, the universe does not care how brave you are, how smart you are or how much you love them. It takes them away anyway."

Eitri threw the whetting stone down onto the table. "It's so unfair!"

"It is," Gaea agreed. "It's not fair, it's not right. Why does he die while evil men live?"

"Why?" Eitri turned to her. Tears brimmed in his eyes. "Why him? Why not anybody else in the universe? Why me?"

Unable to help herself, she put her arms around him comfortingly. "I wish I knew."

Eitri clung to her, burying his face in her shoulder as sobs racked his body. "What am I going to do?" he whispered. "I can't... He's always been there, he's always taken care of me. I can't go one without my brother. I just can't."

Gaea shushed him the way she did her children, stroking his hair. "You'll live. You'll learn. And Freyja will be with you."

Eitri shook his head. "She's only here for Brokk."

"You can't really believe that."

"Brokk's always been better than me. He's the one everyone likes."

"Freyja loves you, too, in her own way."

Eitri snorted.

"She's not one to hand out herself through pity," Gaea told him firmly. "She does care deeply for you."

"If you say so." Eitri wouldn't meet Gaea's eyes. He clearly didn't believe her.

"You'll see," she promised. "Freyja will stand with you. And have you considered that she is more confident with your brother because he is more confident with himself?"

Eitri shook his head, stepping away from her. "I..." he swallowed heavily, and he looked uncertain and devastated. "Will you stay with me tonight? Please?"

Gaea paused, unsure exactly what he was asking for.

Eitri's gaze was firmly locked on the floor.

"I think Freyja would be upset with me if I did that," she said slowly. "I think perhaps it would be better if you went and stayed the night at her house."

"It's not that I don't want to be alone, I don't want to think!"

Silence.

"I'm sorry," Eitri mumbled. "I shouldn't have..."

"You should go see your brother."

Eitri nodded sheepishly, dragging his feet as he left without looking at her.

Gaea sighed, shaking her golden head. Some things are too difficult for even me to understand.

#

Brokk, Nanna and Freyja were just enjoying a small snack (tea and sandwiches) when Eitri knocked on the door, looking awkward. Brokk grinned to see his brother, and waved him in. Freyja got to her feet and quickly got another teacup and saucer. Nanna beamed at the younger dwarf brother.

"I was beginning to wonder if you remembered I existed."

Eitri came in reluctantly, dragging his feet. "Been busy."

"Come sit here," Nanna scooted over, smiling happily.

Eitri returned the smile weakly, moving to sit beside her. "How have you been, brother?"

Brokk was silent for a long moment. "Fair. It is a difficult thing to accept... but I am glad you're here."

Nanna tried to break the awkward silence, offering Eitri the plate of sandwiches.

"Thank you," he mumbled, accepting one.

"I think I should like to move back into the shop tomorrow," Brokk announced.

Freyja sat beside him and squeezed his hand. "I was thinking that same thing."

Eitri froze. "Back... into the shop? Why?" I thought you would want to stay somewhere luxurious for your last days, Brother...

"Because it's home."

Eitri nodded, tears pricking his eyes. I'll just have to be strong and watch bravely... I don't want to see you die!

"Besides," Brokk continued softly. "I don't want to spend my last days wishing I could see my little brother more."

Now Eitri felt guilty. His face flushed, and he wouldn't look at anyone.

"Nanna, can you help me in the kitchen?" Freyja quickly said, realising that the brothers needed a moment on their own. Nanna nodded and both scurried off, although Nanna turned at the door and tried to give Eitri an encouraging smile. He still wouldn't look at her, though.

"Brother, you have been avoiding me," Brokk sighed.

There was no point in denying it. "I don't think that I can bear watching you die."

"But I have such little time left... don't you think your regrets will hurt worse?"

Eitri looked up at last. "I can't do this, brother."

Tears were in Brokk's eyes. He reached across the table and squeezed Eitri's hand. "You have to. Nanna is showing improvement with the forge but she has much still to learn. And my designs... you promised to make them."

"I did promise. I do not know if I can hold myself to it."

"You can." Brokk's eyes were intense. "You have the skill, and the strength. You just never let yourself see it."

"I will do what I can."

"Good." Brokk grasped Eitri's hand firmly. "I'm going to miss you, little brother."

"I'll miss you, too." Eitri choked on the words. "What do you think happens, after-" He couldn't finish.

Brokk was silent for a long moment. "Freyja still speaks with her long-dead husband. There must be something afterwards."

"For Asgardians. How do you know that we-"

"We must have faith. That is all there is in the universe, at the end."

"I'd prefer some solid facts."

"If you want solid facts, then here are some; we all die. Even the stars will grow cold."

Eitri hung his head. "Brokk... have you suffered with this?"

"Somewhat, why?"

"Mother said..."

Brokk waited.

"Mother said that this is the way our sire died. I could end the same way..."

Brokk shook his head fervently. No!

Eitri looked up, his eyes shining with fear. "I'm afraid."

"Don't be." Brokk tried to sound sure of himself. "This won't happen to you."

"How do you know?"

"I just do!" It may be interfering with nature to be healed, but surely Gaea can prevent it from happening in my brother without changing nature itself!

He kept his thoughts to himself though- Eitri wouldn't even consider it.

"I did consider asking Freyja's mother if she could do something..." Eitri mumbled, surprising Brokk. "But what right do I have to ask and elder goddess for such a boon?"

"She's family to us both by marriage now, why should you not?"

"We have always been taught not to interfere with nature. I don't know what to do! And..." Eitri sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I may have propositioned her before I came here."

Brokk choked. "You what?"

"I asked her if she would stay the night with me," Eitri mumbled. "She told me that I should come here instead."

Brokk looked at him as if he had sprouted another head. "Are you mad?"

"Probably. I wasn't thinking."

"Clearly." Brokk frowned. "If you intend to ask for the mother's aid, I suggest you apologise first!"

"She did not seem offended!"

"Not the point!"

"Alright, then to whom do I apologise? Freyja or her mother or both?"

"Her mother, obviously, I highly doubt she's told Freyja!"

Eitri sighed. "You always understood women better than me..."

Brokk rubbed his forehead. "You've gotten yourself into a forge this time, brother!"

"I know. I think I'll just avoid them all until this is forgotten!"

Brokk suddenly burst out laughing. Eitri stared at him, not understanding.

"Oh, Brother! This is just like when we were children!"

Eitri frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Don't you remember that girl with the black ponytail that she wove a golden spike through?"

Eitri thought hard for a moment and then flushed. "Oh. Her."

Brokk laughed. "I thought you'd never live that one down!"

"Shut up." Eitri mumbled.

Brokk only laughed harder.

Eitri smiled. "I'm glad at least that you are in good spirits."

Brokk nodded, his grin fading. "I'm going to enjoy what little time I have left. I'd be merrier if you tried to feel some mirth too, though I know it's hard."

"Hard? I wish it was hard. I almost wish I was dying so that I wouldn't have to try to understand how I'm supposed to continue alone!"

Brokk put his hand on his brother's shoulder, but no words came.

"I'm sorry."

"Not your fault. Not anyone's fault."

"Do you think Freyja will mind if I stay the night? I'm not too fond of being alone..."

"That will be fine." Both brothers looked up as Freyja came in. She smiled. "It's been too long since we've seen you, Eitri."

"How long have you been listening?" Eitri asked apprehensively.

"Why, did you say something you don't want me to hear?"

Eitri gulped visibly. "N-no, of course not!"

Freyja arched a delicate brow. "Convincing."

Eitri looked at Brokk helplessly.

"It's nothing," Brokk said smoothly. "At least, nothing a married woman should hear."

Freyja rolled her eyes."Fine, keep your secrets. What made you change your mind and come here anyway, Eitri? I didn't expect to see you."

"I realised... I don't have time to stay away."

An awkward silence fell.

"Well, I'm glad you're here, anyway." Freyja stated decisively. "You'll stay the night, of course."

Eitri smiled. "Where shall I sleep?"

"I have a guest room."

He nodded. "Thank you."

"Of course."

Eitri hovered for a minute.

"I'll show you where they are, and then maybe we can play a card game or something."

Both brothers smiled at her.

"Perhaps that game you introduced-" Eitri started, but cut off as Nanna came into the room.

She froze, blushing as all three stared at her. "Is everything alright?"

"Yes, of course. We were just talking about a game."

Nanna's face went redder. "Do I want to know what kind of game?"

"A card game, so don't get excited!" Freyja teased.

"Not sure if that's any better, Mor!"

Brokk frowned. "Why is a card game embarrassing?"

Nanna folded her arms and tapped her toes. "I've heard stories when Mor didn't think I could hear."

It was Freyja's turn to blush. b=Both dwarves turned to her curiously.

"What sort of stories?" Brokk smirked.

"Ones I've tried very hard to forget!" Nanna exclaimed, and then went redder. "Although now that I'm going to be married, Balder and I will have to try a few of them out."

Freyja laughed, though she still blushed. "I think that's enough for right now, Nanna."

"But I never see you blush!"

"I'm not blushing!"

"Yes, you are," Brokk teased. "And it's delightful."

Freyja hid her face. Nanna giggled.

Eitri decided to rescue the blushing lady and stood. "You said that you wanted to show me the guest room?"

"Yes!" Freyja straightened up quickly, leading Eitri down the hall. "This way..."

Brokk and Nanna still chuckled as they left.

Freyja showed Eitri into the guest room, then hesitated, twisting her hands.

"Is something wrong?" he asked her.

"I might have overheard more than I let on earlier... something about you and my mother?"

Eitri gulped. "She suggested that I came here tonight."

"I heard a good deal more than that, Eitri."

The dwarf sighed. "I apologize."

Freyja sat down and pulled him with her. "I know you're wanting a distraction, and honestly I do as well, but... my mother?"

"She said no."

"Obviously!"

Eitri hung his head. Freyja covered her mouth.

"That came out wrong."

"No, it was completely warranted-"

"What I meant was you're in an emotionally upset place. You're not thinking straight. Mother would not take advantage of you in such a state."

"Of course that's what you meant." Eitri's tone was sullen.

"What else would I mean?"

"That there's no way a beautiful woman would want me on my own, without Brokk. Which I am already well aware of, thank you!"

Freyja groaned. "Are we getting into that again? I don't sleep with you because of Brokk, I sleep with you because I like it! Or are you saying that I'm not a beautiful woman?"

Eitri scuffed his feet. "You knew Brokk first though. He's the one you made the original bargain with!"

"Only because he was the one who approached me."

He shook his head. "If it had been me, you would have refused."

"I only accepted Brokk's deal because of Brisingamen." Freyja looked at her hands. "But both of you are amazing."

Eitri blinked- he had never thought of himself as anything but ordinary at best! "But you always have favored Brokk."

Freyja's brow furrowed. "Do I?"

"Yes. You always go to him first."

"I didn't realise I did that... and if you wanted me first, why not say something? Or initiate things yourself?"

"You would refuse."

Freyja shook her head in exasperation. "You did not know that!"

He didn't answer.

"Eitri!"

"If I asked you right now, you'd refuse me."

"Yes," Freyja admitted. "I'm married. And marriage required fidelity. It's one of the vows I made. I won't sleep with a man besides my husband... not again."

"Again?"

Freyja looked at her twisting hands. "I never told you or Brokk about Faraldar*."

"Who is-"

"He was the man who nearly destroyed my life. Or rather... I nearly destroyed my life with him. And I did destroy... other lives"

Now Eitri felt awkward. "If this is private..."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up." She sighed heavily. "Are you going to mention this to Brokk?"

"No," he assured her. "I don't think it would help the situation."

Freyja nodded once. "We should get back."

"You go. I wish to gather my thoughts for a while."

With a smile, Freyja left Eitri alone. He sighed and looked around the luxurious room. Too luxurious, he thought. It wasn't surprising that Brokk wanted to return to the shop... How did Freyja ever get miXed up with us? She should be courting kings! His heart sank as he looked in the mirror; short, weedy. Marbled skin and thin lips. How could any woman stand to look at him?

In a fit of sudden anger, he stood, hefting the mirror and turning it so it faced the wall. He didn't want to look at himself. Sighing, he headed back downstairs. Freyja and Brokk were deep in conversation when he appeared, but stopped to stare at him when he came in.

"What?"

"Are you alright, brother?" Brokk asked in concern. "You appear to be very melancholy."

Eitri frowned. "Were you just talking about me?!"

"...No."

The younger dwarf sat down. "Out with it."

Brokk hesitated, not looking at his brother.

"We're worried about you," Freyja said eventually, reaching across the table to grasp his hand.

He fought the urge to pull away. "Why?"

"Why?" Brokk repeated. "Have you been hearing yourself these last few hours?"

"I'm only being honest."

"And if that's how you honestly feel, how could we not be worried? We care about you, Eitri," Freyja's eyes were shining, and her voice lowered. "I can't lose both of you."

A lump formed in Eitri's throat. His eyes smarted. "I never thought you felt that way about me, Lady Freyja."

Freyja sighed. "How many times to I have to tell you that I do for you to believe me? And don't call me Lady."

Eitri sighed. "I've always known I was the inferior one..." He seemed almost to be talking to himself. Freyja glanced at Brokk, puzzled. His eyes were smoldering.

"Eitri, if this is about what Mother used to say..."

"She was right, wasn't she? I'm nothing special."

"You are special!"

"No, I'm not."

Freyja was outraged. "Dis told you that? What sort of mother-"

"Ours."

"If that woman was still in Asgard..." Freyja took a deep breath. "Do you want to know the truth? Why I would choose you second, after Brokk?"

He shrugged. "If you want to tell me."

Freyja took a deep breath. "The honest truth is that being with you first could be painful to begin with. You're so vigorous. But having Brokk first helped to prepare my body for you... And when I had Brokk second... he was boring." She cast a guilty and apologetic look at the older dwarf.

Brokk, however, laughed uproariously. Eitri's jaw was hanging open.

"What?" he managed to choke out.

Freyja shrugged, looking uncertain.

He eventually regained control of himself, shaking his head. "You think you know someone..."

"I don't see what's so funny," Freyja pouted.

"Nothing."

"You're laughing about something!"

He made an obvious effort, and straightened his face. "There. Not laughing."

"But you were laughing. What was so funny? Out with it, Brokk!"

"Where is Nanna?" Eitri suddenly asked, afraid that the conversation would turn unsuitable and she'd walk in at the wrong moment.

"Balder stopped by, they've gone for a walk." Freyja's eyes narrowed. "Now. Tell me what is so funny!"

Brokk hesitated.

"Tell. Me."

"I was only being gentle because I thought you preferred it that way!"

Freyja blinked. "All these years?"

"Ever since you told me that you felt like I was always in a race to see who finished first."

"I could have been more gentle," Eitri put it, "at least at the beginnings. Why have you never said anything?"

Freyja shrugged. "Because I thought it was working just fine."

The brothers exchanged looks.

"We definitely need to improve communication," Eitri muttered.

"You mean you will," Brokk corrected quietly. "I expect that you two will find new ways to please each other, after I'm gone."

That put an end to any lightheartedness.

"I'm a little tired," Brokk continued. "I think I'd best get to bed."

"I'll help," Eitri volunteered.

Freyja nodded. "I'll be along in a few minutes."

Brokk held out his arm, and Eitri ducked under it and helped him to his feet. The brothers went up the stairs together, Brokk directing his brother which room they needed to go to. Eitri's jaw dropped as they entered Freyja's room.

"Does she have enough mirrors?"

Brokk chuckled. "Nobody has said that our Vanir was humble."

"But... there's so many!"

"Yes, there are. She can arrange them so that one little candle lights the whole room. And then she glows..."

Eitri's eyes went dreamy. "Brother, I have a confession to make. I want to sleep with your wife."

Brokk started roaring with laughter again. Eitri joined in.

"Now what are you two laughing about?"

"Nothing!" Brokk wheezed, doubled over with laughter. Without warning, his laugh began a painful-sounding cough. Eitri and Freyja rushed to his side.

"I thought mother healed that!" Freyja cried.

He straightened up, looking fine. "She did, I just inhaled too fast and choked. You two worry too much!"

"I worry too much?" Freyja muttered, smoothing his hair from his forehead.

"Yes."

"And that's a bad thing?"

Eitri slipped out of the room to let them alone. He wandered back to the guest room and laid down. He wanted to request sharing a bed with the two of them, even if nothing was to happen he didn't want to be alone. His mind wandered to Gaea but he shut that thought down very quickly.

I have to learn to be lonely, he thought. The thought only made him sad, but he knew he had to bear it. Better to learn now, than after...

"Where is everybody?" Nanna's voice wafted up the stairs. "I thought we were going to play a card game! Hello?"

Freyja's footsteps echoed on the stairs as she went to talk to her daughter. Eitri toyed with getting up again. Instead, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

#

*Faraldar is an OC from my story The Heart of Everything