Disclaimer: I love you, you love me, we're a big happy family! ...Too bad no members of this happy family own Inuyasha...I think the happy family just became distinctly sad...
A/N Yes, first and foremost (since I was gonna say this in the end A/N of last chapter, but forgot), I saw many/all of you loved the Aqua/Barbie Girl song thing. I just wanted to point out one reason why it's so appropriate. The voice actors who do the voices of Miroku and Sango (the dubbed version), Kirby Morrow and Kelly Sheridan, have had the characters they play hook up in three completely different situations/series. One, as we all know and love, in Inuyasha as Miroku and Sango. Two, in Escaflowne, as Van and Hitomi. And three, none other than...dun, dun, dun...Barbie and the Nutcracker as Ken/the Nutcracker and Barbie/Claire! 'Course, in that movie, Kirby Morrow was Ken and Kelly Sheridan Barbie, but...Miroku makes a much better Barbie, wouldn't you agree?
Congrats to MichelleAnneSummers for being my 400th reviewer! *getting teary eyed* I'd like to thank Calum and Spacewolf and Lauren and Bobby and Sue and Georgina and Maria and Matt and Michael and Richard and Diana and Amelia and...*goes on for another hour, thanking people you don't know* (By the way, I don't know them either...except for the first three)
xo-Kagome-ox, yay, I updated! In the name of Canada! ^_^ Thanks for coming to read my fic by the way and for the multitudes of compliments, lol. I'm going to review your latest chapter soon, I swear. I've just been so busy...stupid school...^_~
Yes, Soul of Kagome, you win a prize! Ding, ding, ding! You win a...um...uh...ummm...could I get back to you on that? That show reference of "It's irrational. It's impossible. It's against my relgion." was actually a request awhile ago so I put it in where I saw fit. ^_^
And for those of you waiting for the ski tutorial, fear not! I will write it and send it to you, just don't hold me as to when. I have a ridiculously busy schedule at the moment and I'll write it as soon as I find some free time.
To all you out there wondering how long my fic will be...let's just say we just finished Saturday of their first week and they have two weeks...I'm gonna estimate half done...
So read on, lovely readers...!
~*~
"You...stupid...pervert...I...have...never...been...groped...so...much...in...my...entire...life!" Sango's pleasant screeching reached Ayame's groggy mind as sun berated her face, forcing her to grimace and open her eyes.
Besides feeling pleasantly warm, the only other odd thing Ayame noticed that fine morning was the picture of Sango beating a black and blue Miroku, who was actually still asleep. It was probably safe to say he hadn't woken up all night and would continue to remain in his unconscious state under Sango's "gentle" ministrations.
"Buh-buh?" Ayame asked incoherently.
Sango whirled around and fixed her with an enraged stare before relaxing. "Oh, it's you, Ayame. Good morning; have a good sl-? Pervert!!" She turned back around in order to slap Miroku's hands and face with a sickening sound.
Ayame cringed. "Are you sure he deserves that?" she asked, yawning.
Sango glared at her. "If you had been me last night, you wouldn't have the audacity to ask that."
Ayame shrugged. "Fine; whatever." She lay her head back down on her warm and comfy pillow. Noticing Sango's smirk, Ayame looked at her suspiciously. "What?"
"Are you sure you're completely awake, Ayame?" Sango asked, openly grinning.
"Of course I'm not," Ayame responded sleepily. "It's morning. Who's ever awake in the morning? And why do you ask?"
Sango shrugged. "Oh, I don't know," she said nonchalantly. "It might have something to do with the fact that you haven't seemed to realize that we spent the entire night with the guys last night and, well, that your pillow is more than what it seems..." she finished slyly.
"My pillow is wha...?" Ayame looked down at where her head had been to discover navy blue material from a shirt. She followed it upwards with her eyes until it gave way to the skin of a neck which grew into a sleeping face with dark hair framing it. Ayame stared blankly at it for a minute before it clicked. "Kouga?!"
The eyelids on the sleeping face shot open to reveal startled bright blue eyes. The boy sat bolt upright, his arm draped around Ayame's shoulders causing her to be flung across his lap. "What? Who's there? What's going on? Did you save the sparkle-haired ponies?!"
"I'm pretty sure they got out okay..." Sango said slowly.
"Oh, good," Kouga said, slumping back onto the couch.
"Um...excuse me...?!" Ayame shouted indignantly in a muffled voice from where her face was stuffed into the fabric of the couch.
Kouga looked down confusedly at the red-haired girl spread across his lap. "I could have sworn that wasn't there before..."
Sango rolled her eyes. "No shit, Sherlock."
As Kouga continued to ponder how a girl happened to be flung across his lap, Ayame angrily scrambled up, red-faced and completely awake. "Why, you...you...offensive-because-you're-not-quite-awake-yet person!" Ayame shouted, pointing a finger in his face.
Kouga yawned in her face. "I'm tired, mommy. Can I go back to bed?"
Ayame gaped at him for a moment before assuming a devilish expression. "I know how to get you up... Kouga! Don't look now, but the reporters are here!"
Kouga's head snapped up and he shot off the couch, grabbing Ayame and swinging her around. He grasped her tightly with both arms around her waist and held her in front of him like a shield. "Where?! Where!?"
He looked down suspiciously when he heard Ayame start to giggle and slump against him for support. "Y-you're so funny!" Ayame gasped out between laughs. "You shoulda seen y-your face!"
Even Sango's laughter was heard across the room and Kouga blushed before leading Ayame, who was still leaning on him, back to the couch. He sat down beside her and crossed his arms, sulking. "That wasn't funny!" he protested.
Ayame reached a hand up and patted him on the head. Between giggles, she said, "Oh, don't sulk. It was a joke. You know I love you."
Even uttered as a jest, Kouga couldn't help but hope there was an underlying truth to those words.
~*~
Comfy. Safe. Warm. Mmmm...
Those were the thoughts going through the recesses of Kagome's sleepy mind at that moment.
So comfy...
It didn't feel like her bed, though. Didn't even feel like the bed in the condo they'd rented.
But it was comfy. Much comfier than either of those beds. She didn't REALLY have to wake up yet. It wasn't mandatory. She could stay here a little longer...
Then came the giggling. The irritating laughing reaching her ears that was like a bad itch; she couldn't scratch it in order to make it go away. It kept rousing her from her comfy bliss.
Her brows furrowed. Why couldn't the owners of those laughs just be quite and allow her to remain in her perfect unawareness of the world? Now she was practically awake and couldn't enjoy the comfiness to its full extent.
What was the source of the comfiness, anyway? It wasn't a bed so what could it be?
Reluctantly but curiously, Kagome cracked an eye open to see her head was resting on a red shirt covering a muscular chest.
Ah, so that's what it was. A chest. Now that that was figured out, she could go back to sleep...
Wait-what? A chest?!
Kagome's eyes flew open and took in her surroundings. She found herself draped across Inuyasha, her head on his chest and her right arm across his stomach. She could also feel his arm wrapped around her waist.
"I-Inuyasha?" Kagome whispered quietly. She could tell Ayame, Kouga and Sango were having a conversation above her and certainly didn't want to advert their attention to her position.
After receiving no response, she looked up at his face. He was still asleep and there was a happy expression across his features.
"Okay..." Kagome muttered. "I can still salvage my pride...if I just kinda sneak away without the others noticing..."
She tried to push herself up slowly and back away silently. Tried.
As soon as she twitched a muscle, Inuyasha's arm tightened around her waist and pressed her more tightly against him, murmuring something that sounded suspiciously like, "Teddy."
She tried to push herself up again, but his arm tightened its grip even more and she was all but squashed against his chest. Not like she was exactly complaining or anything, but anytime now the others might...
"Hey, Kagome. Looks like you've got yourself a problem there."
Kagome winced at the smug tone of Sango's voice and the responding chuckles of the other two awake individuals. She heard footsteps before Kouga's voice sounded above her, "Alright, Kagome. I'll wake him up for you. But, man...I wish Miroku were awake...he could be a big help in getting Inuyasha up... Kagome, just try not to get hit by any flying limbs."
Kagome pried her face out of the crevices of Inuyasha's hardened chest in order to protest. "It's okay, Kouga; really! Watch." She reached up her free hand and placed it softly on Inuyasha's cheek as she had done at her condo the previous day. After a few moments, Inuyasha's eyes fluttered open and Kagome snatched back her hand.
There was a thud as Kouga fell to the floor on his butt. "But...how did you...? What kind of sorcery...? How in anyone's name did you manage...?" Kouga cut off from his rambling in order to simply gape at the pair.
"Ugh...what's going on...?" Inuyasha asked groggily, sitting up and rubbing his head with the hand that wasn't residing on Kagome's waist.
"Well..." Kagome started and Inuyasha looked down at her in surprise. "You were trying to claim me as your teddy and Kouga was just about to wake you using forceful measures when I instead woke you up, gently, so that you could release your death grip on me."
Inuyasha looked down in shock at his arm that was tightly wrapped around her waist and pressing her body against his. He blushed crimson and released her quickly with a very loud, "Keh!" He crossed his arms and avoided making eye contact.
"Sango! Love hurts, but I will prevail and win your heart!"
Everyone in the room looked over at Miroku was still unconscious and now uttering love declarations. After his statement, however, he seemed to rouse from his sprawled position on the floor. Sango quickly crossed to the other side of the room and hid behind Ayame.
"Ow, my head..." Miroku mumbled, sitting up and clutching the main source of his pain.
"Rise and shine, Miroku!" Kouga said. "Better go get ready for a new skiing day!" he continued a bit forcefully as he helped Ayame keep Sango from sight.
Miroku shrugged and started for his room, muttering bewilderingly, "You know, I had the nicest dream last night. It was pure bliss." He began digging around in his room and throwing various things behind them as they turned out not to be what he was looking for. "It was all about Sango, too. Truly the best dream I've ever had..."
Sango shoved Kouga and Ayame out of her way and stormed into Miroku's room. "Why you-" She was cut off abruptly as a purple, sparkly feather boa smacked her in the face. Pulling it away and looking at it disbelievingly, she stuttered, "Uh...M-Miroku...? What exactly are you doing with a f-feather boa...?"
Miroku whirled around at the sound of her voice. "Oh, Sango...I-I didn't know you were there."
Sango fumed again. "Of course I was there! We slept together, remember?! ...No, wait! That sounded bad! We slept NEXT to each other. And that dream was more then a stupid dream, you pervert!"
"Ah, so that's why it started getting so painful..." Miroku mused.
Sango glared before holding up the object in her hand again. "That still doesn't answer the question of why you have a purple, sparkly feather boa in your room!"
Miroku glanced at it a moment before he seemed to recognize it. "Oh, that! Rin gave it to me to hide from Sesshoumaru."
"Why would you have to hide it from Sesshoumaru?" Sango asked, confused.
"Well, it's going to be part of Fluffy's next costume. And obviously, Sesshoumaru would destroy it thoroughly if he ever knew and got his hands on it so Rin entrusted it to me," Miroku said as if him having a purple, sparkly feather boa in his possession was a perfectly explicable occurrence.
"I see..." Sango said slowly. "Well...I'll leave you to your clothing scrounging, then..." She slowly backed out of the room.
"Hurry up and get ready, guys," Ayame was saying to Kouga and Inuyasha. "We'll never get out skiing if you refuse to stand up for another hour."
"Yeah, and while you get ready, us girls will make breakfast," Kagome said cheerfully.
"Actually," Ayame cut in. "I'm going to go to the lodge for a quick minute to grab a hot chocolate. I should be back soon."
"'Kay," Sango snuck herself into the conversation. "Well, boys? Get crackin'!"
With a few grumbles and groans, Inuyasha and Kouga rose and shuffled towards their rooms, Inuyasha still avoiding eye contact with Kagome.
Kagome and Sango began cooking some bacon, eggs and toast as the sound of showers beginning to run filled the air. As the boys emerged, fully clothed and toweling their hair dry, the girls just finished cooking. Ayame also entered soon after, out of breath from laughing.
Everyone looked at her suspiciously. "What is it?" Inuyasha asked slowly.
Ayame shook her head and held out two tabloids she had clutched in her mittened hand.
One was a picture of Kouga striking a hero's pose on the balcony outside; his arms outstretched and reaching for the sky. Underneath it, it read, "Elite Fis Racer, Kouga, Declares His Undying Love To 'Ayame'."
Sango snorted. "Nice pose, Kouga."
"It is rather, isn't it?" Kouga said blandly.
The second was a picture of Kagome and Inuyasha covered with bubbles beside a sink containing dirty dishes that had yet to be washed. The heading read, "Are These Affections Bubbling To The Surface?"
There was a distinct thud as Inuyasha's head collided with the table.
"I feel the same way, Inuyasha," Kagome said pityingly as she laid a hand on his back. "The tabloids are completely idiotic and something to be laughed at and yet...ridiculously embarrassing..." She buried her red face in her hands.
"Well, hurry up and let's eat," Sango said. "It's already ten o'clock and us girls still need to get ready at our condo before we can go skiing."
"Yes, ma'am," Kouga said, saluting her sharply.
They all started to dig into their breakfasts, deciding to ignore the insinuating tabloids for the time being. After they had all shoveled down their food, they all got up and prepared to put their skiing equipment on.
"Hey, Kagome?" Inuyasha asked as he began putting on his boots. "Could you go grab my toque from my room?"
"Sure," Kagome said, going into the room which she knew as his. A few minutes later, she stumbled out, clutching her sides. "I-is this it, I-Inuyasha?" she managed to get out.
Inuyasha looked up to see what was making Kagome laugh so hard and immediately went bright red. "Uh...no...that's not quite it..."
Kagome was holding up a beautiful white toque with two dog ears perched on the top and giggling her head off at the same time. "But...it's...so...cute!"
"Rin gave it to me one year as a birthday present..." Inuyasha muttered. "I've never worn it and I never will!"
Meanwhile, Ayame and Sango were climbing into all of their gear. Without looking, Sango reached for her coat and accidently grabbed Ayame's without noticing. She did notice, however, as soon as she put it on and saw the green and yellow fabric of Ayame's coat against the pink and black material of her ski pants.
Ayame saw the combination and cringed. "Ouch. Tacky. Very tacky."
Kagome looked at them slyly for a moment before suggesting, "Hey, how about you two swap each other's jacket, one of each other's boots, one of each other's poles and one of each other's skis for the day? That would be the ultimate tacky! I so dare you!"
Sango and Ayame looked at each other for a moment before grinning stupidly. "We'll take that dare," Ayame said smoothly, "as long as you agree to ski with some of the leftover bright pink streamers wrapped around your poles and hanging from your helmet."
Kagome scrutinized them briefly before nodding and agreeing. "Fine. I'll do it." Then she looked over at the boys who were busy strapping themselves in their boots. "But the boys will feel so alone not being tacky or wearing something embarrassing. I propose Inuyasha has to wear his ear toque."
"Say what?!" Inuyasha yelled. "No way am I wearing that thing!"
Kagome turned back to her friends with a sad expression on her face. "Aw, too bad. It looks like Inuyasha's too much of a wimp to accept the challenge."
"Now, wait a minute," Inuyasha protested, standing up. "I'm am in no way a wimp. I'll wear that stupid hat. I'm not afraid of it!"
Kagome hid her smirk.
"Yes, and I think Kouga should let us girls do his hair for today," Ayame mused, eyeing Kouga's silky tresses.
Kouga covered his hair with his hands. "What are thinking about...?" he asked in a suspicious tone.
"Are you too chicken as well, Kouga?" Ayame challenged.
Kouga straightened and crossed his arms, a muscle in his jaw twitching. "I am perfectly comfortable in my masculinity. Do what you will."
Kagome and Ayame shared triumphant looks as Sango advanced on Miroku.
"And I think our dear pervert should be made to wear the lovely, purple, sparkly feather boa he had secreted in his room for whatever purpose as his scarf for the day," Sango said with a grin.
"I told you why that was there!" Miroku protested. Under Sango's level gaze for a minute, though, he backed down. "Fine." He held his head up high. "I'll do it. I, like Kouga, am perfectly in tune with my Y chromosome. No purple, sparkly feather boa can daunt me!"
The girls smirked at each other as the boys' shoulders slumped.
"Somehow, I think they got the better deal..." Inuyasha muttered to Kouga and Miroku.
~*~
A/N Eek! I am sooo sorry for the huge delay guys! My teachers decided to try on evil for the past week and a half to see how it looked on them. And they concluded that it looked so good that they'd keep it on for a little extra time. And plus, I was away all last weekend. But I have managed to get this chapter out and I can only say sorry and beg for your forgiveness. At least I didn't make it to the two week delay mark...
But I wonder what havoc could be cause by the tackiness next chapter? Plus the entry of everyone's favorite dimwit! I wonder who that could be...hmmm...you'll have to stay tuned to find out!
Can't wait to hear your thoughts on this chapter, though! Talk to ya later!