Chapter 13

I feel bad for lying to my friends. Can I truly even call them that? It's true that they're truthful in everything they tell me, so why can't I return the favor? Silently I ran my fingers over my denim shorts, where I knew the scars are. Even with all of my scars, the lies I've told my newfound "friends" out numbers them considerably. My thighs are so scarred I know that no matter how much time I give them to heal, and no matter how much anti scarring cream I use I will never be able to show my thighs to anyone.

I remember the first time Soul saw my scars. At that point I had been cutting for not too long, maybe 6 months. It was two weeks after the incident he had witnessed in the bathroom. I mean, yes he did bandage my wound, but he wasn't looking at my thighs. He was distracted by the gaping wound in my thigh. I'm sure most of the things running through his head were unbelievably hard to deal with.

"Is Maka going to need stitches? What's wrong with her? Why would she ever do this to herself? And most importantly, is this my fault?"

I wish I could have had the chance to tell him before he died. It's not his fault; it was never going to be his fault. This was my decision, and no matter how dumb, or dangerous it may be, I'm the only one to blame.

Looking up at the faces around me I decided that little by little I would let these boys in. I don't think I'll start with anything big like my self-harm, what happened that day, or how Souls relationship with me was different than most friendships, but I could start with at least some truth.

I stood up, looked into everyone's eyes one by one, took a deep breath, and began explaining.

"To tell you all the truth, I've been lying to all of you." The looks on their faces weren't of shock of course not they already knew I was lying, but the expressions before me had softened from worry to a mix of relief and concern. I understood that they were relieved that I was finally going to explain parts of the mystery that is my life, but still I was nervous. The only person who knew what I planned on telling them was Soul, and even then I had kept what that man did to me a secret. I also never told him the truth about my parents.

"I'm going to try my best to talk to all of you, but I haven't really ever had anyone to tell these things, so I keep them bottled up or lie about them. There are a few things I've lied about that I'm just not ready to talk about, but I will at least try to share a bit okay?"

I had meant the question to be rhetorical but all around me the nods of my classmates reassured me that even if I'm not ready to talk about it, they'll wait and try to help me any way they can. Taking a deep breath I prepared myself once again to start talking.

"As some have you may have figured out, like Kyoya did, one of my stories didn't really match up the second time I was asked about it. Kyoya has been asking me things about my parents essentially since day one and it's time I finally give him a truthful answer." I could see Kyoya quickly become interested in what I was about to say but didn't pull out his black notebook because that would kinda ruin the mood.

"When I stayed over-night at Kyoya's house I told him that my parents would be asleep and wouldn't care that I was out. That's a complete lie, my parents always had to know where I was going who was going to be there and when I planned on going home. What kind of parent wouldn't care for their child right?" I could feel the tears threatening to paint my cheeks with a shade between despair and pain but I held it back. I began picking and ripping at my already torn nails. It was the only distraction I could ever find when there was something I really didn't want to do.

"One day when I was at the academy, I was pulled out of class. That never happens because I'm always the goody two-shoes, bookworm, honor student who would never get herself into trouble. So I knew immediately something was going on." Remembering the events of that day was painful but still I had to keep going.

"As soon as we had stepped into the hallway, the lady who had called me out of class burst into tears. Being the kind of person that I am I comforted her to the best of my abilities telling her that everything would be okay." A single tear rolled down my cheek but I made no attempt to hide it or wipe it away.

"When she had finally calmed down she apologized for being such a mess and told me that it should be her comforting me not the other way around. I was confused because why would she need to comfort me? So she started her story and told me that today while they were out my parents were driving through an intersection, and some idiot ignored the red light. I was feeling really worried like oh my gosh what hospital are they in and when can I go see them, but she wasn't finished her story quite yet. I'm so sorry Maka but they didn't make it." A few more tears rolled down my cheeks but at his point I didn't care.

"Just a simple nine words broke me down. I went back to class but couldn't even think straight. I just sat there staring at the floor. Soul was really worried so he took me out of the class and forced me to tell him what was wrong. As soon as I told him my parents were in an accident he was all ready to drive me to whatever hospital they were in. I couldn't even answer him I was crying so hard. All I could do was shake my head and hope he understood that I meant they had died."

Looking around I saw a few of my classmates were tearing up, this was one of the reasons I never said anything, I hate seeing people feel pity for me. I had taken a bit of a break but before long I finished my story.

"After shaking my head I felt like I couldn't breathe I was crying so much. Soul just held me and let me cry, he tried to comfort me as best as he could but the last of my family had just died so it wasn't really easy for him. So telling the truth, the reason I lied about my parents is that I hoped by not telling you, you wouldn't feel bad for me. I know it was a stupid plan but I didn't want your pity and I still don't."

AN: so obviously maka has started to trust the boys a bit more. Yayy! Anyways leave a review if you liked the chapter, leave a review if you hated the chapter, and honestly leave a review telling me what you had for breakfast yesterday (JK I would prefer constructive criticism) also I don't know if you guys kinda got it but I'm sorta basing Maka off of myself because that's kinda my life (well not about the parents or the awful man but other parts are me) if you ever need someone to talk/vent to just hit up my pm box and I'll reply as soon as I can! Byeeeeee for now!