Sheldon has met Penny's fiancée and is about to confront his feelings for her.
The first brush of his lips on hers was chaste. Then he slowly placed his hands on her shoulders and pressed his lips to hers more firmly. He frowned slightly as nothing happened. He moved his lips slightly and Penny opened her mouth. Sheldon tentatively swiped his tongue across her bottom lip, but he still didn't feel the thrill he expected. Penny's arms wrapped around his waist and instead of it feeling nice, he felt trapped. With a shudder he pulled away and stepped back.
Penny smiled gently and reached out to place a hand on his arm. "Do you see?" she asked. "The attraction you feel is mental, Sheldon. It's not physical. I've been where you are. I felt the same way. Real attraction is mental, emotional and physical."
He sat down and looked at his hands on his lap. "Please don't send me away," he begged quietly. He shuddered and looked at her fearfully. "I don't think I can go to a different therapist."
Penny cupped his cheeks and smiled at him. "Not if you really hate the idea. You and I will work through this, just as we have worked through everything else."
He looked up at her and sighed. "Penny, I am very confused."
She nodded as she released him and sat down. "So was I. It's not so uncommon."
His shoulders slumped slightly. "Penny, it seems that every time I think I am getting a handle on one problem, another surfaces. I still feel like I want to kiss you, even though it was not particularly pleasant for me."
She nodded. "I know. It can be very confusing when your mind and body are at odds with one another. Sheldon, have you ever been attracted to a woman? Physically?"
He shook his head and blushed. "I have found many actresses and models attractive, but only in an aesthetic way. I have never met anyone who made me feel desire. Other than this," he mumbled.
Penny was quiet for a long time. Long enough for him to become apprehensive. Finally she gave a nod as if making up her mind. "Pull out your sampler, Sheldon. We'll finish our session sitting side by side. Next week will be your group activity. I want you to promise me that you will spend all day Saturday with Howard and Leonard."
He nodded immediately. A day spent with two friends was infinitely preferable to the quilting bee or puzzles at the center. This would be the easiest group activity yet!
XTBBTX
"You're lookin' a bit nervous," Charlie said with a grin as he leaned against the fence near Sheldon.
Sheldon turned to him with huge eyes and gulped. "Why is Penny trying to kill me?" he whined softly. "I pay her very well. I am never late, nor do I stay past my allotted time. I endeavor to always do whatever she requests." Sheldon twitched and his cheeks turned red. "Is this punishment for kissing her?"
Charlie burst out laughing and clapped Sheldon on the back. "Come on, buddy. Let me introduce you to a few friends. Who knows, you might find you have something in common with one or two people here."
Sheldon hesitantly followed Charlie to a small group at a table near the porch. "Hey, folks," Charlie grinned. "This is Penny's friend, Sheldon. He's a bit shy, so be nice."
"Hey, Sheldon," a portly man with a ruddy complexion said. "I'm Chris, that's my wife Edith, my son Darrell and our friend Becca."
Sheldon nodded to each one carefully. Darrell ignored him, seemingly intent on staring at the girl with the purple hair.
Becca stood quickly and smiled with relief. "Sheldon? Missy's brother?" He nodded and then tried to jump back when she grabbed his arm and began tugging him toward the house. "I'll bet you're looking for your sister," she said in an overly cheerful voice. "I'll take you to her!"
Before he could find the words to make the young woman release him, they were up the steps and inside the house. He shuddered when Becca dropped his arm and gave a relieved sigh.
"Thank goodness you showed up," she told him. "One more minute of that horndog staring at my boobs and I would probably have hit him." She grimaced and looked up at him. "And then I'd be out of a job."
He rubbed his arm, still feeling the warmth from her hand. It sort of tingled too, he realized. He looked around the room to give himself time to gather his composure. "So, you know my sister?"
Becca nodded and moved down a small hallway. "Yep. I work at the bakery. I'm in culinary college," she answered, looking back at him over her shoulder. "You're a rocket scientist, right?"
Sheldon gasped and grabbed her arm, bringing her to a stop. "I am a theoretical physicist!"
She frowned questioningly. "What's the difference?"
Sheldon gawked at her for a moment before answering. "It's the difference between Helen Homemaker baking cookies and you making crème brulee."
Becca studied him for a moment before smiling widely. "Okay," she said. "Understood."
Sheldon blushed and released her. "I apologize for manhandling you," he mumbled.
She shook her head, her purple hair flying around he face. "You're too cute, Sheldon. Come on. Missy's probably dragged Bo to the small barn. She was really excited to see the new foal."
He swallowed nervously and followed Becca through the house. Darn Leonard and Howard for accepting Charlie's invitation! And darn Penny for tricking him into accompanying them!
XTBBTX
Missy watched him lean against a tree and look out over the fields. She gave the foal one last pat before wiping her hands down her jeans and walking over. Over the last couple of weeks they had gone out for lunch twice and for a walk through the park once. They talked every night before going to bed. She was growing to love him more than she thought possible. That's why the dark circles under his eyes worried her so much.
"Hungry?" Bo asked as she approached.
Missy slipped her arm through his and leaned her head against his shoulder. "Talk to me," she begged softly.
Bo drew in a deep breath and looked away.
Missy let go of his arm and stepped in front of him. "Bo, please talk to me." He flinched and looked at her. The pain in his eyes made her heart ache.
Bo moved to sit down under the tree and drew her down beside him. "I have nightmares," he told her. "Nightmares so real I feel like I'm still there."
Missy placed her hands in his. He didn't seem to notice.
"There were fourteen men in the unit I was following. Good men. They didn't just share transports with me. They shared their lives. Brandon, who's mom sent everyone birthday cards with Mad Libs for them to fill out. Carl, who use to be his little sister's mannequin as she created her own fashions. Marcus…"
Bo closed his eyes, his hands gripping hers tight. "Marcus was the clown of the group. He was always telling these hilarious stories about his family and hometown." Bo opened his eyes and looked at her bleakly. "We went through hell, Missy. Death, blood, pain. I held a small boy while he took his last breath. He was caught in the explosion he set off himself."
Tears spilled down Missy's cheeks as she faced his pain. "But you survived," she reminded him.
He gave a harsh laugh. "Did I? Because there are days that I don't feel like I did."
Missy pulled her hands free and placed them on his cheeks. "You did," she promised. "I know you did because you make me feel. I was so dead inside, Bo. I didn't even have the will to hate. But then I met you. Do you have any idea how I see you?"
She smiled softly and ran her thumb along his cheekbone. "You make me smile. I just have to think about you and I smile. You have so much strength in you, and I can see it in your eyes. Seeing the bravery and willpower in you gives me the courage to keep going."
Bo started to shake his head, but she held his still. "I'm not saying that you are responsible for my happiness. Only I am in charge of that. But I see how strong you are, and it encourages me to try. I see the determination in my brother, and I find the will to keep going. I see the genuine love and concern that Penny and Ginger have for their patients and I know I am never alone."
Missy leaned forward and gently kissed his lips. "You are never alone, either."
Bo sighed and caressed her cheek. "Missy, you know I'm ill. MS doesn't go away. There's no cure. What kind of life do I have to offer you? Eventually, this will beat me. How can I ask you to stand by and watch me get worse?"
Missy sniffled as a tear slid down her cheek to his palm. "How can you ask me to walk away from the man I love just because it's not all rainbows and kittens? Would you walk away if you knew I would die first? Would you abandon me if I was ill?" She leaned forward and pressed her forehead to his. "I love you, Bo. Please don't make me live without you before I have to."
Sheldon felt Becca slip her hand into his but he didn't pull away. Instead he gave it a little squeeze and they both headed back into the house. Sheldon ignored the blurriness in his eyes. Missy's words to Bo had hit him hard. Until now he hadn't realized that he had felt the same.
He no longer felt alone, isolated. There were people who cared about him. Howard. Leonard. Penny. Missy. He had people he loved, and people who loved him in return. Bo's life was going to be cut short eventually, but he didn't have to spend it alone. What about his own life? Missy was strong enough to grab what happiness she could, regardless of the heartbreak she knew she would eventually feel. Did he have the same courage?
When they reached the hallway Sheldon released her hand and looked down at her. "Please excuse me. I need to speak to someone."
Becca nodded and walked away. When she reached the door she paused and looked back. "You know the best thing about being broken?" He looked at her sharply, questioningly. She smiled and shrugged. "When you are put back together, there's all these tiny, sometimes microscopic shards, that are missing. You're no longer sealed up tight. There's these little holes that lets the stuff sealed inside leak out. Makes it easier to share yourself with the people around you."
Sheldon watched her open the door and slip outside. After a moment he smiled wryly. For someone with such atrocious hair, she wasn't uninteresting. He walked outside and turned toward the pool. He needed to talk to Penny.