It had started at the end of the battle to which she thought there would be none left standing, and certainly not herself. Of the fighting, Kaede remembered relatively little. She could have been forcing her way through the waves of soldiers for over an hour, and yet it seemed to be just a matter of seconds in hindsight. A great stretch of exertion, pain, blood, and then... just the gentle lapping of the waves against the rocks.
Kaede opened her eyes. The dawn was just breaking. Once the hardness of the ground pressing into her back reached her, she realized, with a jerk onto her side, that she was still alive. The sudden movement produced extreme pain in her Kaede's left side, and she blacked out at once. The second time Kaede woke, the sharp pain was there from the start, building ever so slightly in intensity. Physically, she had never felt like this since she was a child. Rolling onto her side, much more carefully this time, Kaede gave in to nausea and vomited profusely. Most of it splattered onto the eviscerated corpse sprawled in front of the desk. With a pause, Kaede recognized the suit, as well as the severed head resting almost ceremonially on the desk's surface just above her. It was Kakuzawa, his crimson eyes still fixed in an intense gaze of hatred; his mouth gaping and indignant at the death that he knew was inevitable.
Moving away ever so slightly, Kaede took in the hideous sight for a while as she caught her breath. Just the appearance of Kakuzawa's furrowed brow and penetrating, sightless stare made her want to vomit again. His horns were plainly visible, just like those of his son when he had revealed himself to her, flesh-colored and stunted. Reflexively, she reached up to her head, but found only jagged, broken stumps barely covered by her hair.
"That's right," Kaede thought. "I lost them." She was barely aware of it when one horn had been broken off by Mariko, but now, in the aftermath of her struggle, the full realization that her other horn had now been shot off dawned on Kaede. There was some blood, but the injuries were greatly eclipsed by her other wounds. Her side, her arm, her hip... Everything could have been burnt away, for all she felt. Wiping her mouth slowly, Kaede gave a low, intensely quiet, rumbling laugh. Miniscule tears came to her eyes but didn't fall, as she leaned back in exhaustion, away from the blood-and-puke-soaked corpse, arms sprawled over her head on the floor.
So, what now? Kaede felt as though she should be doing something now, despite her lack of strength, but nothing came readily to mind. She had steeled herself for death, all for the goals of killing her enemies and ensuring Kohta's safety. Now they were gone, and Kaede remained. The pain that she felt shooting through her whole body was so... pointless, she thought. Unless… this was her punishment. Kaede would have laughed again, but she was too exhausted. No, this pain was immense, but there was no possible way it could provide equal restitution for the sorrow Kaede had caused Kohta, countless others, and herself.
The question was how long this corporeal pain would last. Surely she hadn't long left to live; she would succumb to her wounds, and death would take her. That was when the real punishment would begin. An eternity in the hell she knew full well she deserved. Kaede was resigned to her fate. She had been steadily preparing for it ever since meeting Kohta for the first time in eight years. However, she could never have predicted the nature of the reunion between the two, and Kohta's expression of love borne out of sadness. Kaede would have let Kohta done whatever he wanted to her when he held her back on those stone steps. She half-expected that he would kill her outright, or else torture her to release his hatred. But Kohta's words made Kaede feel ashamed to remember the gregarious little boy from so long ago, and how he would never have done something so selfish.
Ever since the fateful day when Kohta's family died at her hand, Kaede was determined to distance herself from him, ensuring no harm befell him, and no more sadness came his way on account of her. Indirectly, she felt, she had brought that back after all, beginning with Kaede's new infantile personality washing up on the beach practically into Kohta's arms. Unintentional, perhaps, but allowing him to become attached to a brain-damaged alteration felt so cruel. And now that her brain injury had healed, Nyu was never coming back.
In her increasingly drowsy state, Kaede wasn't sure where the thought to move to the broken window ended and her action to move there began. Yes, it was much kinder to Kohta that she fade out, now that she had done her duty. Any future rejoining between them would be counterproductive. Slowly, Kaede peeled off her stockings. Some of the blood had already started to clot, and her vision blurred whenever a wound reopened. Still, she continued without pause, slowly, very slowly. The dress was harder to remove, partially on account of the greater number of bullet wounds to her torso, and partially due to the twisting Kaede had to do to free herself from the stain-hardened shell. Just when she felt her spine was going to break in half, it was off.
Panting raggedly, Kaede made a last feeble effort to remove the ribbon around her neck and her underwear. The bra took some time. Truthfully, she had only ever put on a bra once, getting dressed in Nyu's clothes after the younger Kakuzawa's attempted rape. Taking it off was easier, though still a great labor in her condition.
Kaede dropped down once the last article of clothing left her body. She resisted the urge to shut her eyes, keeping them open until fresh tears swelled to the surface. Taking as deep a breath as she could manage, Kaede gently rolled over, crawled on all fours to the opening in the glass, and raised her head. As always, her long bangs obscured her face, revealing just one bloodshot eye framed by a muddle of blood and tears. Kaede thought that the early morning air was kind of nice as it blew in through the hole. It was mild and slightly salty, just like his lips.
"Kohta..." Kaede breathed, and she closed her eyes, slammed her vectors into the desk, and hurtled out into the void. The last thing she heard was the gentle lapping of the waves.
The next several days passed like minutes, with no real distinction between night and day. There was no coherent train of thought, nor was there awareness of her surroundings. At long last, a woman's voice trickled into Kaede's ear.
"-going to take time, obviously. We're only here because we can't take her to a hospital. The important thing is that her wounds are stabilized. We just have to wait until she wakes up."
As Kaede gradually opened her eyes, the dimly-lit room revealed the speaker, a woman with glasses she had never seen before, and… him. Kaede thought vaguely that she should be shocked, but seeing the one she loved only brought a light smile to her face, and fresh falling tears. Arakawa gasped, and jerked back involuntarily. Kohta didn't move, but locked eyes with Kaede, his face already wet, but composed.
"Kohta," said Kaede. Her smile did not falter. "Oh, Kohta."
The man kneeling over her bent down and gave Kaede the most delicate of embraces. Seeing the two touching one another for the span of two, then three heartbeats, Arakawa let out her breath and inched forward.
"Lucy… My name is Arakawa. I've been treating you after Kohta found you here."
"And where… is this?"
"It's Kaede House, Ny… Lucy," said Kohta, outwardly calm, but his voice shaking. "One day, you just… came to my front door and collapsed."
"I don't… remember any of that."
"You were in shock. I did what I could for you; I don't have a medical degree. It was easier to treat your wounds since you must have removed the bullets yourself," said Arakawa, sitting respectfully on the tatami mat.
Another thing Kaede had no recollection of. It wouldn't have been the first time her vectors had moved on their own, even as she slept. Now turning to the nervous woman in glasses, Kaede's head grew clearer.
"Who are you?"
Arakawa explained her situation to Kaede, as well as how she came into contact with Kohta through the university records she had hid. The attack made on the island facility by Kaede had given Arakawa the opportunity to attempt an escape. In going to Kohta's house to warn him of the danger he was in, Arakawa had stumbled upon the mess Kohta had found, reunited with Kaede. Even without her horns, even with all the blood, Arakawa knew Kaede for what she was. She made no mention of the imprisoned Silpelits, and Kaede did not ask about them. Kaede didn't ask why the woman had likely saved her life, either. Once Arakawa was finished talking, Kaede simply nodded, and turned her head to the side, resting.
Looking slightly dazed, Arakawa gave a nod to Kohta, who nodded back, and watched her edge out of the room, looking back once before sliding the door shut. After a few seconds, before Kohta or Kaede could say anything, the door was yanked back open.
"Kohta? Is Nyu…?"
Yuka entered, moving quickly to the side of the futon on which Kaede lay.
"Thank… Thank God," she said, touching Kaede's hair gently. Kaede noticed how red Yuka's eyes were, as well as a sense of uneasiness coming from her. This was different from the uneasiness shown by Arakawa, and was highlighted by quick glances Yuka made between the lying Kaede and Kohta.
"Yuka, Nyu got her memories back. Her name was Lucy, all along," said Kohta. "She can talk now, too."
"Lucy… Are you okay?" said Nana, slowly coming in, moving toward the others. Her youthful face showed nothing of fear or anger, but genuine concern, and even, Kaede was astounded to see, pity.
"Don't… be worried about me," Kaede found herself saying.
"But how…" Yuka began, but Kohta cut her off.
"Listen, Yuka, Nana. Right now, Lucy needs rest. Her wounds are getting better, but she's just now woken up for the first time in days, and she must be tired."
With a pause, but without a word, Yuka, put a hand on Nana's shoulder and exited. After endless moments more of staring, Kohta rose, and turned to leave, but Kaede tugged at his sleeve. Neither of them said anything, but remained where they were. Kaede was taken aback when Kohta spoke first.
"I think I know what you want," he said. She cast her gaze downward, and let her hand fall. "Don't... Don't think I'm trying to be cruel, but... what makes you think I want to give it to you? Do you expect me to be grateful for what you did the other night, and just forget about what you did to me when we were children?"
"No! Kohta, that's the farthest thing from my mind!"
Sitting up, Kaede held onto his arm with both hands, pulling him gently. "You should know that I don't care about my own happiness at all." Tears threatened to spill from her dark red eyes, and Kaede said: "Kohta, I need punishment. I want you to take out all your hate, all your anger on me."
Kohta took half a step back in shock, his mouth agape. "What..."
"Please, Kohta," said Kaede, as she moved her forehead to the floor. "Rape me. Beat me. Kill me. Do whatever you have to do."
"You must be crazy," replied Kohta, wiping sweat from his brow. "Is that what you really want? What makes you think I can do that to you, in the first place? What will that accomplish?! That's-"
His words fell short as Kaede uneasily got to her feet, throwing her arms around Kohta's neck. He grit his teeth.
"Nyu..."
"That's it," Kaede said, drawing back. There was the slightest smile on her face. "And my name... the name I should have given you when I was a little girl... It's Kaede."
It was as though her words triggered something in Kohta. A palpable fury ignited in him; Kaede felt it as he slowly took hold of her shoulders. The pressure he used to grip her was just past her threshold of pain, but Kaede didn't cry out. As Kohta's hands moved again, and opened her yukata, letting it fall to the floor, Kaede rested her head on his shoulder in silent resignation. She felt Kohta's hands slide over her still-tender flesh, pressing ever deeper. As one hand paused over the bandage on her arm, it started to squeeze.
"Ah!"
"Are you enjoying this?" Kohta asked her in a flat, even voice. Kaede buckled from the sudden pain, and thought she would collapse. Kohta, brutally, but with calm and deliberation, took hold of Kaede and lowered her to the futon like a lover would.
"Of course not," Kaede answered. "But I need this. You need this."
"I... don't understand. I don't understand what I'm doing, but I'm doing it."
"Give into it, Kohta," Kaede said soothingly, reaching up stroke his face.
After a brief pause, Kohta snatched her arm away, and forced it downwards. It was left pinned to the floor, and Kaede began to feel truly trapped as Kohta seized her other arm. Lying on her back like this, Kaede just watched as Kohta surveyed her naked body, keeping her forced into place.
Kohta had seen her nude before, but that was only her body, and not the full presence of Kaede. In reacting to Nyu's nakedness, Kohta had always averted his gaze as best he could towards Nyu's helpless state. But now, given mastery over her, he was free to look wherever he pleased; to look, and to touch. Kohta struggled to comprehend the simple truth that it was his choice whether the young woman under him would feel pleasure or pain. At the moment, he hesitated, unsure of his goal.
Kohta swallowed, his initial hate melting into some feeling he couldn't place. Without really thinking, he drew his trembling arm back. Her face remained impassive. Though the broken flesh gave way under the pressure of a caress, Kaede's expression was unaltered. Finally, the tears flowed freely, and Kohta sobbed hard, turning his face away from his would-be victim. It was only then that Kaede's own face darkened, and choking on her tears, pulled Kohta clumsily to her in as tight an embrace as she dared.