Present Chapter 13: December 16th to 19th, a glee fanfic

Disclaimer: I own nothing

I'm trying not to use the word "said" (or sing(s)) too much… as I feel like I probably overused it a lot earlier.

Sorry for the lateness and shortness, I just ordered my computer, and very little has been done on the next chapter, things have been...hectic at home. I wish I'd stayed back in the college town.

Chapter 12 December 16-19

Santana was woken by Brittany snuggling into her. It was odd and comforting, she mused, that no matter how many times she had tried to get Brittany to sleep in a different room, she just kept wandering back in. She knew Brittany wanted to sleep in here, but she knew that she had to try for both their sakes. When she had impulsively invited Brittany over for Christmas, she hadn't thought through the consequences. Each moment she was with Brittany brought on emotions and feelings that she wasn't prepared for, even unsure of but at the same time she didn't want to let them go. So whatever she was feeling for the other girl, she had to hide it, she didn't want to risk ruining what they had. But Brittany each night would end up in her bed and by the third night Santana knew it was useless to keep trying an alternative. But after last night, Santana stopped trying to get Brittany to sleep in the other room. She looked over at the blonde sleeping peacefully next to her. Although Brittany had been sleeping in bed with her, Santana always woke when she felt the other girl get out of the bed at odd times of the night. Concerned about the blonde's safety she followed. Originally Santana thought Brittany had just needed to use the bathroom, instead Brittany headed to the living room and took residence by the window. The last few times this happened Santana, returned to bed in order to respect Brittany's need for space.

Last night, the moonlight reflecting off the blonde's skin made it almost glow. It was so beautiful, but even with all its beauty, it seemed so sad. Knowing Brittany had made it to the window safely, Santana moved to return to her room, but then Brittany started singing. It was a simple, sweet, sad melody and like magic it seemed to hold Santana where she was, unable to do anything but listen.

Brittany for the past few nights had trouble sleeping. Every night the thoughts of home and her mother returned, she was able to push them back during the day when she was busy. But as the silence came with the night, the thoughts returned, sometimes she could go back to sleep knowing that Angel was right beside her or that her sister loved her. But most nights, like tonight, they drove her to seek solace alone and somewhere no one could hear. The only solution when it got this bad was to let them out, only then would they recede back into the dark places of her mind until the next time they plagued her. She did this often at the hospital, finding places where people wouldn't be bothered by what she was going to do next. Tonight she wasn't alone, but Brittany was unaware of the person who was standing just across the room, with concern clearly being written across her dark features.

Where is love?
Does it fall from skies above?
Is it underneath the willow tree,
That I've been dreaming of?

Where is she?
Who I close my eyes to see?
Will I ever know the sweet "hello",
That's meant for only me?

Who can say where she may hide?
Must I travel far and wide,
'Till I am beside the someone who,
I can mean something to?
Where, where is love?

Every night I kneel and pray
Let tomorrow be the day,
When I see the face of someone,
Who, I can mean something to.
Where, where is love?

The last question lingered in the room, Santana stood there not knowing what to say. But some part of her knew what needed to be said, and responded to Brittany in song.

She cries by the window,

She thinks no one can hear.

She's the girl all alone,

Who hasn't smiled for more than a year.

She asks every night, into the dark.

But lack of an answer, has left its mark.

Who will love me for me?

Not for what I have done,

Or what I've become.

Who will love me for me?

'cause nobody has shown me,

What love, what love really is.

Then out of the darkness,

A single voice rings,

And answers the question,

That the young woman sings.

It tells her, it's there, that it will always be.

So don't worry, this isn't just a passing dream.

I will love you for you,

Not for what you have done,

Or what you've become.

I will love you for you,

I will give you the love.

The love you never knew.

Reaching Brittany, Santana warmly but awkwardly embraced the other girl and led her back to the bedroom. Tucking the blonde in, like Santana's brother did to her so long ago, she chastely kissed her on the forehead and told her to sleep. The Latina lay down beside her and held the blonde comfortingly until morning.

(December 19th)

Brittany woke up to the sound of running water, felt the area beside her, there was just a trace of warmth from the previous occupant. Tracing the space, she wondered if Angel knew that her heart raced every time they were in contact. The first time she had noticed it was when they had gone to the park, they were on a bench and she had asked if they could stay longer. She had laid her head down on the strong shoulder, and felt safe in a place she'd never been, with a girl she barely knew. And yet, she was warm and for once she thought she was somewhere she belonged. Is this what love felt like? The sound of water turned off and Brittany turned toward away from the sound of footsteps coming, she felt as if she was a child that had done something wrong and didn't anyone to know.

Santana stopped in the doorway, should she get Brittany up or let her sleep. She looked like a princess who was waiting to be woken by some gallant prince, and there it struck Santana that that was sadly someone she could never be. She sighed, who knew that this unassuming girl would have made such an impact on her life in such a short time? But enough of these thoughts, it was time to make breakfast. Considering that she practically had to force Brittany into the kitchen because Brittany's idiotic mother had banned her from the area, she'd better get her up now. Shaking off thoughts of violence and sadness, Santana spouted an evil grin as she moved to the bed. She threw off the covers keeping the blonde warm and pounced, tickling her poor victim. Brittany did what all ticklish people do; she laughed and flailed madly in vain trying to ward off her attacker. It was about ten minutes later when they both lay panting on the bed.

"It's time to get up," Santana said laughing. "Come on." She took Brittany by the arm and was met with little resistance until they got to the threshold of the kitchen. As soon as she hit the doorway, Brittany stopped as if some invisible barrier had created itself between her and the kitchen. Santana cursed Brittany's ability to know spaces.

"For the love of… you can come in Britt." Santana silently cursed the woman who had treated Brittany like some kind of cripple. "One foot in, then the other, this place doesn't bite. If it does bite back." Damn woman, Brittany didn't even know how to pour her own cereal. "Nothing bad's gonna happen." Ok, this isn't working. "I invite you in?" To her surprise that did work, interesting. Santana made a mental note of this for next time. Maybe she likes vampire shows or something, there was a show Fluffy the Vampire Saver or something that she might like in that case. Brittany's stomach growled, thoughts later, food now, was the message Santana got from it. Grinning, she pulled out a chair for Brittany and grabbed the cereal boxes, milk, and other essentials.

Seeing Brittany still standing, Santana stopped smiling, "You can sit down, you know." She was going to fix this and if she ever met that woman, she was going to pound that face into…

"Stop scowling," interrupted Brittany's voice. "I can't see, but I'm not blind." Santana smiled at that. "That's better," said Brittany approvingly. Santana wondered how on Brittany could tell, when her stomach growled. A slight flush of colour appeared on Santana's cheeks in embarrassment.

"Let's eat. Remember how to make your breakfast?"

Brittany nodded and proceeded to carefully make her breakfast, under Angel's watchful eye. She had just been taught yesterday how to do this, it was a lot harder than her mom made it seem. She put her finger in the bowl and poured, then felt around for the milk, adding it until she felt the cereal reach the tip of her knuckle, exactly as Angel taught her. She made this herself with no help. Feeling accomplished, she put down the milk and began to eat her cereal.

After Brittany made hers Santana fixed up her breakfast, honestly she was getting tired of eating cereal, it was the only food she had time for during the school days, and she seldom ate it during weekends or holidays unless it was for a snack. But when she found out Brittany didn't know how to make this simple breakfast for herself, and… well that had to be fixed. Just like problem of getting the blonde into the kitchen in the first place. Well, Santana sighed, at least she seemed to have mastered the ability to make cereal, now they could move on to other food. Hopefully, she should convince Brittany to help tomorrow morning or lunch. Nah, lunch was sandwiches and Santana couldn't guarantee Brittany's safety using a sharp knife. Tomorrow morning it was then. With both of their bowls empty they had nothing pressing to do, so they talked. Well to be exact Brittany talked and Santana listened. Whenever the older girl tried to get the younger to talk, questions were always met with short and concise answers, not harsh or angry, but to the point.

Brittany was more than happy to change the topic off of her when Angel suggested they play a game called 'What if'. Some of these were acted out, Brittany favorite ones so far were what if Angel was a pirate captain and Brittany her first mate, or what if Brittany was a valiant knight in armor rescuing her Angel in distress, or maybe they were on a secret mission ordered by the president. Some were more wishful, what if they had met earlier, and today Brittany came up with what if Brittany wasn't so stupid, that was one the blonde suggested but the Latina put a quick end to that line of thinking and ended the game there before it could go down any other roads.

Seeing Brittany's head looking down dejectedly at her hands with a sad smile on her face, Santana gently lifted Brittany's head up and pulled her into the living room. Turning the radio on, she attempted to find a station that wasn't just playing Christmas music. There were only four, 99.5FM a mix of music old and new, 104.7FM was playing musical soundtracks, 89.9FM that was playing classical music and 88.3FM that was some bastardization of an attempted Latin American mix.

"Hey Britt, which do you want? We got a mix of random songs, musicals, Latin American, and classical." There was no response. What would cheer that girl up? Supposedly musicals worked at least in the Glee club, musical station it was. It wasn't working not even after three songs, not that Santana knew any of them. Wait this song she knew. This was from the same play as the song Brittany sang last night, at least she still remembered the words. Turning toward Brittany, she began exactly on time with the words, hoping Brittany would join in.

I'll do anything,

For you dear anything,

For you mean everything to me.

The ghost of a smile appeared on Brittany's face.

I know that,

I'll go anywhere,

For your smile, anywhere

There was definitely a smile now.

For your smile, everywhere

I'd see.

Only the radio did the woman's part.

Would you climb a hill?

Anything!

Wear a daffodil?

Anything!

Leave me all your will?

Anything!

Even fight my Bill!

What? Fistcuffs?

I'd risk everything,

...Was Brittany blushing?

For one kiss, everything,

Yes, I'd do anything

Anything

Anything for you!

Santana didn't bother with the spoken lines, and waited until the singing resumed.

I'll do anything,

For you dear, anything

For you me everything to me.

I know that

I'd go anywhere

Getting caught up in the moment Santana brushed Brittany's cheek with the back of her fingers lightly.

For your smile, anywhere

For your smile, everywhere,

I'd see

Brittany did join her voice this time.

Would you lace my shoe?

Anything!

Paint your face bright blue?

Anything!

Catch a kangaroo?

Anything!

Go to Timbuktu?

And back again!

Santana felt her stomach flutter because she thought part of her might truly mean it.

I'd risk everything,

For one kiss, everything

For only a moment Brittany felt bold, but it only took a moment for her to kiss Angel on the cheek. Brittany was sure her face and ears were red, from a mixture of pride, from being able to do such a thing, and yet terrified that Angel might have noticed her feelings. The fear increased when Angel didn't finish the rest of the song.

Santana was too busy telling herself that Brittany only meant it as a friendly gesture, to notice Brittany's reaction immediately. She concluded that someone who gives hugs so freely could also see a kiss as a form of expressing friendship. That had to be it because Brittany didn't deserve someone like her, she was not a good person, and anybody like her was not worthy of someone like the blonde. Santana knew that she was already being greedy about the time she spent with this girl, what other reason could she have, beside pride, to refuse a sensible ride from Puck during that blizzard. And she was taking advantage of this girl's kindness and predicament. So no matter what she could feel, or might be feeling, she couldn't let it go past friendship. She noticed that Brittany seemed upset, not quite trusting her voice, she took Brittany's hand and squeezed it to reassure the girl that it was ok. Santana was relieved when a small but genuine smile appeared on her friend's face. At least Brittany was, sort of, happy again. As the music continued to play she moved the furniture to the walls. It was a decent size room if you got all the stuff out of the way, and knowing Brittany's ability to know distance without having to see combined with her dancing ability this limited space should be no problem. Moving took longer than Santana thought it would, and by the time she was finished it was well past lunch and almost into dinner. Brittany hadn't said anything the entire time.

"Hungry?" asked Santana. "Come on," she tugged Brittany toward the kitchen. "Let's see if I can make anything with what we have left." An idea struck Santana, "Tomorrow, will you teach me how to dance?"

Brittany's chewed her lip uncertain. She had never been asked to teach someone else before, it had always come naturally and being unable to see would make it more difficult. Brittany was so distracted on the problems that tomorrow would present that she passed the threshold of the kitchen without stopping. Santana made another mental note of this; distract Brittany and she forgets about things like this, good.

Peering into the fridge, Santana got out the remainder of the chicken she had prepared for herself right before break. With what she had, she could make… soup? Getting a pot of water to boil, she added some chicken flavoring, noodles, the chicken, and some seasoning. Opening the door to the fridge again, she looked at what meager food supplies she had left; half a carton of milk, cheese, lettuce, a tomato, a banana, and half-a-dozen eggs. Well at least they ha d breakfast tomorrow. Although she could live off what she had for the next three weeks, Santana doubted that Brittany could do the same, very few people had her stamina, and even Puck would only last maybe a week at most on what they had. This unfortunately meant that she would have to leave Brittany by herself again, because Santana knew she needed the extra space to strap the groceries down. She knew Brittany would be fine by herself, but it still felt like she was abandoning the other girl. Before she could say anything, the phone rang. Who the hell could that be? When Santana picked up the phone, a voice greeted her.

"Hello minion." Of course it was Sue. "We're crashing your house for Christmas. By we, I mean my sister and me. No arguments, got it. We're coming. I'm bringing the movies, you bring the food, drinks, shelter, and any other entertainment. Unfair? Maybe. We thank you for your hospitality in advance, and we'll see you Christmas Eve. I expect presents." With that Sue hung up the phone. Santana on the other hand, blinked. Did that just happen? It wasn't outside of Sue's… character to do this, but now? Right. OK. She definitely had to go to the store tomorrow.

SHIT! That was the sound of a pot boiling over. As Santana ran back to kitchen to prevent any more damage to the food tonight, she heard the scraping sound of the pot being moved. When she arrived at the kitchen, the pot was no longer boiling over; however Brittany was holding her hands as if they hurt. Apparently, Brittany had moved the pot off the hot burner with her bare hands. Quickly taking charge of the situation, she hurried Brittany over to the sink, and ran her hands under cold water all the while checking for possible burns. Seeing none, she sighed in relief, Brittany's hands might sting for a couple minutes before they recovered from the heat, but it was better alternative to what could have happened.

"What were you thinking? You could have seriously injured yourself!" Brittany didn't say anything, but Santana knew what she was thinking that she had done something stupid, which in a way she did but Brittany was only doing what any inexperienced person would instinctively do. " Next time, if it hurts, stop doing it. You saved the food but I'd rather have ruined food than a cooked Brittany." She brushed Brittany's hair out of the way. "Ok?" Brittany nodded. "Ok, let's eat."

They ate in silence, as if the blonde's mood had descended on the entire house, preventing even the lightest of conversation. Santana was at a loss at what to do, her solution to being upset or other people being upset was to go pound the person making them feel bad; currently Brittany's mother was unavailable, and she wasn't about to lay a hand on Brittany. Feelings that couldn't be fixed with a couple of well place punches, were usually easier to forget about after sleeping. But she didn't want Brittany just to push them away, unfortunately she had no idea how deep the scar was, and scars, she knew from personal experience, don't just fade away. Even so, Santana's mind was screaming at her to make Brittany feel better, even if it was just pushing the feelings aside for a bit. But she had no ideas, nothing.

Brittany knew it was her fault that the good mood that Angel had worked so hard to restore had been lost, in a matter of seconds because of something she did. Feeling guilty, she was unable to even talk because what if she said something that made this atmosphere worse. So she said nothing. Angel tucked her into bed; Angel was always so nice to her, before getting in beside her. Brittany could tell Angel wasn't asleep because her breathing never evened out and although the other girl had been quiet while changing her positions, Brittany could feel the bed shift. It seemed like hours later when a quiet voice broke the silence.

"Hey Brittany, you awake?"

"Yes."

"Can't sleep either, huh…"

"Sorry."

"It's not your fault." Even in the darkness Santana still managed to find Brittany's hand. "Since we're still awake, we should talk."

"About?" Brittany was curious; she found that Angel usually let her do all the talking.

"I don't know, something until we can fall asleep," was the reply.

Brittany decided to take the initiative, "Did you know? That sometimes I'm so clever, I don't understand a single word I'm saying?"

"I believe that. Did you know I broke the Universe because I discovered how it works so it had to be replaced by something even more bizarre?" Unknown to Santana, Brittany had raised her eyebrow in amusement.

The mood was definitely lightening, so Brittany tested the less gloomy atmosphere with something silly, "Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?"

"Did you know that sapphires and rubies are made up of the same element? Ugh, that one wasn't as good as yours."

"I heard one like that before, I think it was, dolphins and sharks are the same species."

"Obsessed with dolphins are we?"

"Nope, but I got another. Did you know, dogs have owners while cats have staff?" Santana silently shook from laughter at that, knowing that was all too true. It was contagious, as Brittany felt the bed shake, she couldn't help but start to giggle herself. From there it quickly escalated into full blown laughter. The shadow that seemed to have occupied the house disappeared as the laughter coming from the two girls drove it off. As the laughter died down, the tension that had been in the room had been relieved, and sleepiness seeped into the two.

"Night," yawned Santana.

"Good night," Brittany said as she drifted off to sleep.

So I gave up and split this into two chapters so I would at least have ONE part out this week.

Quotes from Oscar Wilde, Robert McCloskey, Douglas Adams, Paul Klee, Saki (manga), and Saki (doujinshi), and Glee.

Songs Used (in order): Where is Love? From Oliver! The Musical (it can be found on the soundtrack or on Youtube with varying degrees of musical talent). Excerpt of the chorus (only the chorus) of Love Me by JJ Heller, this is not what was intended when it was written or preformed but I feel like it gets the message across. I'd Do Anything from Oliver! (again… I need a new musical… Wicked or Les Miserables or even perhaps Title of the Show, Avenue Q, or something).

"Hey Brittany, you awake?"

"Yes."

"Can't sleep either, huh…"

"Sorry."

"It's not your fault." Even in the darkness Santana still managed to find Brittany's hand. "Since we're still awake, we should talk."

"About?" Brittany was curious; she found that Angel usually let her do all the talking.

"I don't know, I suppose something until we fall asleep," was the reply.

Brittany decided to take the initiative, "Did you know? That sometimes I'm so clever, I don't understand a single word I'm saying?"

"I believe that. Did you know I broke the Universe because I discovered how it works so it had to be replaced by something even more bizarre?" Unknown toSantana, Brittany had raised her eyebrow in amusement.

The mood was definitely lightening, so Brittany tested the less gloomy atmosphere with something silly, "Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?"

"Did you know that sapphires and rubies are made up of the same element? Ugh, that one wasn't as good as yours."

"I heard one like that before, I think it was, dolphins and sharks are the same species."

"Obsessed with dolphins are we?"

"Nope, but I got another. Did you know, dogs have owners while cats have staff?" Santana silently laughed at that, knowing that was all too true. Brittany felt the bed shake, and started to giggle herself. It quickly escalated into full blown laughter.

Quotes from Oscar Wilde, Robert McCloskey, Douglas Adams, Paul Klee, Saki (manga), and Saki (doujinshi), and Glee.