A/N: This next first part is just a series of emails back and forth between Derek and Meredith... but this site is weird about certain things and it keeps messing it up when I upload! So bare with me and I hope its not confusing.
Message to: Hotmancandy
Message From: Schoolgirl
Message: Failed to mention!
Um, excuse me Derek. While you were busy telling me how much I would love college and how exciting it all was and about all the partying and social events and bla bla bla!!! You failed to mention all the FREAKING home work. I mean seriously?! Are the professors trying to prove something? Tell me why I need to read 250 pages about why a neutron is called a neutron and a proton is a proton. I DON'T CARE! I think they secretly plot together and do this on purpose… bog all the freshman down with endless reading assignments and history reports and math work… JUST so we'll freak out and go running home to mommy. Unfortunately for me though… they didn't take into account that I basically have no mommy to go running home to… so I'm stuck here, awake at 2 in the morning… trying to decipher the words of Shakespeare and Hemingway. I feel deceived!... And I blame YOU. )
Me.
Message to: Schoolgirl
Message from: Hotmancandy
Message: re Failed to mention!
Oh my poor poor Meredith. (And I am writing that with complete sarcasm.) Only four weeks of college and you're already going crazy? Give it time… I promise you'll adjust and things will become easier. By the end of your first year, when your physics professor announces a pop quiz on the two chapters that were optional to read… you'll have come to figure out that nothing is ever optional and you'll have read the work and ace the test. I know it. You are the smartest girl I've ever met… and if I was able to survive four years of that… and choose four years more… I have no doubt you can. Please, just hang in there. For me. You might even find after your first semester that you love it so much you'll take two times the classes next year and get your degree even sooner than the rest of your classmates… like me.
Anyways…lighten up. Things can't be that bad. Did you take my advice and ask around for the good party's? I know you're nervous…but I promise… after the first one you'll be a pro. Just no drinking. I mean it. And stay away from the "mystery punch". There's nothing mysterious about it…it's pure alcohol that will get you wasted in one shot…which might seem tempting, but I promise… when you wake up the next morning on a smelly couch with a girl named Helga who doesn't believe in shaving… ya... need I say more?
Keep your chin up!
Me.
Message to: Hotmancandy
Message from: Schoolgirl
Message: Need sleep
I didn't think it was possible to be so tired. I haven't slept in two days. The homework, mixed with my roommates snoring that I can hear from across my dorm, and the construction crew that seems to work all night long on the demolition of the old cafeteria across the courtyard… I think I just might go mad.
How did that lab go that you were super nervous about? I bet you nailed it. I'm sure you were nervous for nothing. You are after all the Derek Shepherd. (Now I'm being sarcastic!) Any exciting news? Hot party's?... oh that's right… When you reach med school, you're so over that. I wish you would stop pressing the party thing…. I'M NOT INTERESTED.
I miss you. And I know we promised not to say that… but it's true.
Me.
Message to: Schoolgirl
Message from: Hotmancandy
Message: I miss you too
I do. I really do. But I'm glad you are where you are and I am where I am. You need this experience Mer. You need to find out who you are, without me influencing you and ESPECIALLY without your mom. I can see your potential… and it amazes me. But it makes me sad that you haven't realized it yet. But it's not your fault. You didn't exactly have the easiest childhood and no one deserved the things Ellis repeatedly did to you. She broke you Mer. And as much as I want to fix you... I can't. Only you can.
I know this is hard… and that it sucks. But I also know everything will work out in the end. What that means exactly, I'm not sure. But I'm confident it will be whatever's best. For both of us.
So know that I miss you. And that I think of you, daily. But go out there, ask out that cute guy in your English class (Trust me; a forward girl is a huge turn on. It takes off the pressure.) AND GO TO THAT PARTY FRIDAY!! You'll be pleasantly surprised. Just don't forget to call me afterwards… I need to know you avoided the mystery punch.
Me.
Meredith groaned at the loud incessant ringing that was interrupting her much needed sleep. Hitting at the alarm clock roughly did nothing to alleviate the noise, so grudgingly she pried open one blurry eye. She furrowed her brow as the numbers slowly registered. It was early. Way too early for her alarm to be going off.
She sat up when she realized that the ringing sound was not coming from her alarm clock but from her small cell phone resting on her dresser charging. Reluctantly, she swung her legs over the side of her bed and hurried across the room, grabbing her phone and pressing the tiny 'answer' button before her caller was sent to voice mail. At this time in the morning, there was only one person who had the nerve to be calling.
"You do realize what time it is here don't you?!" She answered, faking annoyance as she climbed back under her warm covers, the frost of the cold day outside evident on the chilly hardwood floor.
"I'm just making sure you don't over sleep. You have that history final today."
Meredith giggled. "Right. You were calling because you were so worried with me oversleeping and missing my final. It had nothing to do with the fact that you have your own Prescription Meds presentation today and have been stressing about it for three weeks straight."
"Right."
"Derek."
"What?!"
"It's okay. You can be nervous. But I don't know why you would be. You have it all down pack. Hell, I practically have it down pack, all the hours and hours of you reading that crap to me. But I shouldn't complain, you cured my insomnia."
"Hey! It's not crap. You'll be thanking me one day. When you take it yourself and realize I've already taught you all there is to know."
Meredith shook her head and rolled her eyes even though she knew he couldn't see her. He never tired of trying to talk her into going to med school.
"Whatever." She paused a moment. "Derek, stop worrying. You'll be amazing."
"Thanks Mer. I needed to hear you say that."
"You're welcome." Meredith wiggled in her bed until she was comfortable. "So, where are you right now?"
"I'm sitting in my car in the parking lot outside of the classroom. I wanted to make sure I got to class on time but didn't realize just how early I was. I still have twenty minutes before the building is even unlocked."
Meredith laughed. "Well I guess there's nothing wrong with that. Better early than late. But if you're too early… that red head is going to find you again. You better watch out."
Derek moaned. "Ya. She really doesn't give up. I'm surprised she hasn't come tapping on my window yet."
"Be nice." Meredith giggled. "Not all girls were born with the ability to resist your charm. Like me."
"Oh no." Derek argued. "You my dear most definitely cannot resist my charm. If I remember correctly, all I had to do was tilt my head ever so slightly and you would do anything. And I do mean anything."
"No way. I don't remember this at all. Every time you tilted her head I would just feel sorry for you… I thought you had a neck problem or something. I was ready to refer you to my chiropractor." Meredith bit her bottom lip to keep from laughing. She knew exactly how irresistible it was when he did the head tilt thing but wasn't about to admit it.
"Ha!" Derek laughed loudly into the phone. "I don't think so Meredith Grey. Two words for you. Shower and Bendy thing. Okay I guess that was three words but you know exactly what I'm talking about."
Meredith felt her face grow warm. They had done a good job of steering clear of mentioning their intimate relationship from the summer, and she suddenly found herself at a loss for words.
"Anyways." Derek cleared his throat, needing to change the subject quickly. He hadn't meant to bring that subject up, it was too painful with her half way across the country. "How was your date? Was he any good?"
Derek squeezed his eyes shut and prayed for the correct answer.
"Excuse me? So rude. A girl never kisses and tells. And if there had been any kissing...which there wasn't because the guy had some serious bad breath… even before we ate… I wouldn't have told you."
Derek laughed, hiding his relief. It was he that had encouraged her to go out and date. But talking about it and it actually being done were two separate things. But he was trying his hardest to be the supportive Derek. The one that she needed right now.
"Well, at least you got a free meal…. Right?"
"Ya… I guess so. But no more geeks from the math department. I've learned my lesson."
"Fair enough."
They enjoyed each other's silence for a moment, just listening to one another breath on the other end of the line. Meredith's eyes began to grow heavy again and she had almost fallen back asleep when Derek's soft voice brought her back to consciousness.
"Umm Mer?"
"Ya?"
"Have you given anymore thought about Christmas?"
Meredith sighed. "Ya. I'm not coming. My mom made it pretty clear that she would be working the whole time and wouldn't have any time for me. I can't come. It would just be too weird."
"I'm sorry. You do know that my parents would love for you to celebrate with us though don't you?"
"I know. And I feel bad turning down your mother's invitation. But I just can't. Not this year. It's better this way. Anyways I was offered a job on campus over break so I won't be bored. There are lots of things to keep me busy. Don't worry. I'll be fine."
"I know. But I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too." She replied quietly, squeezing her eyes shut, knowing he had no idea how much she meant her words.
"I gotta go Mer. My class is starting soon. Thanks for helping me pass the time. I'm sorry I woke you up so early."
"Any time Der. Any time. Good luck. I'll talk to you soon."
"Okay. Bye."
"Bye Der."