A/N: Part one of a request for itachiuchihas on tumblr (ItaSaku: post war prompt maybe ? :) Or whatever you would like to do!). At first I was going to write a one-shot, but then the story just kept going and so I thought that it would be way easier to read if I divided it into parts. Since I'm taking part in the sasusaku marathon, I don't know when I will be posting part 2 (and possibly part 3, since I don't want to rush the ending).
Btw, if someone is waiting for the story for day 2 of the sasusaku marathon, I'll be posting it later tonight. I got a horrible migraine yesterday and I've slept through most of it, so I was sadly unable to finish it on time, but I'm dutifully working on it right now.
Anyway, I hope you'll like this story.
Enjoy!

Summary: "Somehow they made it work, even if they were all in the process of healing and still hurting inside."
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: T
Other info: post war AU, part of a series, kind of dark

FLICKERING LIGHTS
"Good people are like candles. They burn themselves up to give others light."
–Turkish proverb

Part 1

Before the war, before her word had been painted in greys and before it had all basically gone to hell, Sakura took many things for granted.

Her life had been simple then. There was no need to take off the pink-tinted glasses she had been wearing with such naiveté it made her cringe to this day, because inside the walls of Konoha she was supposed to feel safe. No danger should have been able to touch her there. For a long time, far longer than was probably needed, she had been shielded from every danger. Her innocence and the pureness of her soul were only a tip of the iceberg of things that should have stayed with her forever. Even in their line of work, where death started to follow you like a shadow the day you stepped outside the Academy doors as a genin, there was a possibility of living without the burden of someone's blood on your hands. After all the gruesome stories about great battles that had brought pain and loss alongside victories where just that back then – just stories which, while still horrifying, couldn't physically hurt her in any way.

The horrors she experienced for those few months after Pain's invasion were a testimony to the fact that not all of the stories ended with happily ever afters.

People were just so breakable. In a way, they reminded her of glass – no matter how much time you spent hardening and preparing it for the worst, there were still things that could make it shatter into pieces and sometimes it was simply impossible to put them back together.

They had lost so many, she couldn't even remember all the names.

Some of them had died on her table and under her glowing hands. Some never came back from the battlefields. Some had protected her. Some had sacrificed themselves for others. Some smiled when the time came and some did not. Some had been her comrades and some had been her friends, and some had been strangers, but no matter who they were, they still should have lived longer.

Sometimes, when she had too much time to think, the guilt of the survivor threatened to swallow her whole. She couldn't get the image of their motionless face out of her mind and their blood seemed to be tattooed into the skin of her hands, even though she had killed far less than others.

Sakura was a healer before a shinobi, but it didn't mean she hadn't done deeds she would rather forget about.

Her hands were meant to bring relief and strength to those who needed it, but they could also crush bones, snap spines, break necks and then they could kill without spilling a drop of blood too. When she looked at them – those small palms with long fingers and fingernails painted green – she was both amazed and terrified of the force held by those seemingly insignificant limbs.

She had never thought about such things before.

Now was a different story.

It took her a month to stop going on autopilot and then another two to start talking about something other than work and the weather. The house she and the boys had been given help a lot in making her realize that life went on.

It was the first major difference she needed to face after coming back to Konoha almost a year after it got destroyed and it was welcomed. She didn't know how she would have fared if she had been forced to live in her old home. She had lost her father during the war and even though her mother was still alive, there would be simply too much memories of the old times in those walls to bring her the peace of mind she so desperately needed.

The house was big enough to give each of them space when they needed it, but also small enough to serve as a cocoon of comfort during days when one of them couldn't face the past alone.

It was a wooden two-story building in the west part of the village that was a perfect mix between modern and traditional.

The ground floor was more traditional.

There was a genkan right at the entrance and the shoji screens served as the doors inside. The first one to the left lead to a living room, which was full of light during the day due to the ceiling-high glass doors. It was where Sakura liked to spent time the most. It lifted her spirits and she liked looking out into their small garden. Next there was a spacious kitchen, which Naruto deemed his kingdom. For someone who was so obsessed with ramen, he could actually cook very well and the things he made were, surprisingly enough, on the healthy side of the spectrum. There was also a restroom and two other rooms which they mostly used for storage. Scrolls, books and weapons of all kinds could be found there and since Sasuke was a neat freak, he had organized them in the way that made it easy to find anything within minutes.

The upper floor held four large bedrooms and a bathroom with both a shower and a bathtub.

Though living with Sasuke and Naruto was strange, especially at the beginning, she still loved it.

They had breakfast together, which usually consisted of a bowl of rice and some miso soup with an additional plate of sliced tomatoes, all courtesy of Naruto, who was the earliest riser among the group. Sometimes, when the blond was feeling particularly creative, he would make a bento for each of them. Hers always had an array of cute faces made out of baby carrots, tomatoes, cucumber and grilled fish, and the thought behind this gesture never failed to make her feel warm all over.

Then they would go spar if they had time. If not, they would arrange to meet during lunch to grab a bite. They returned home at all hours, but there was always a late dinner to look forward to at the end of each long day. It was immediately obvious who had put an effort into putting the meal together, because Sasuke's idea of food was tomatoes all around and Sakura cooked the amount that could have easily fed an army. Naruto's meals were the ones everyone favoured, since he knew what he was doing and how much of said thing he should do.

Somehow they made it work, even if they were all in the process of healing and still hurting inside.

Sasuke had it the worst. There were times when he would either start sobbing out of nowhere or go berserk on the first person who dared to address him. He couldn't stop blaming himself for his brother's death and the guilt he wore like a cloak made her heart ache. His psychological evaluation showed that he was suffering from a severe case of PTSD and there was no saying if he would ever be able to be a ninja again with the amount of trauma he had already suffered.

Naruto was sometimes so quiet, she could actually forget he was even in the room with her. He had changed so much it was hard to see the loud-mouthed kid in the hard lines of his face and the sharpness of his blue eyes. He spent most of his time playing shogi with Shikamaru in various different places round Konoha and helping Kakashi in the Hokage office with the mountains of paperwork.

Sakura was okay.

There were nights when she had nightmares, but they were few and far between, mostly because she actually couldn't sleep . Her inability to fall asleep was a problem she fought in only way she knew would work – she exhausted herself to the point of passing out. She still couldn't smile like she used to, but she knew that she would be able to do it in time.

So maybe she wasn't really okay, but she was well on her way to be.

-o-o-o-

It was Wednesday afternoon when everything changed.

They were eating lunch at Ichiraku's as they often did, even though it was the middle of December.

Naruto had a manila folder full of papers concerning an upcoming Kage Summit opened in front of him, which he needed to go through and memorize before the end of the week. He was trying to multitask, but he always ended up with either his chopsticks half-way to his mouth or jabbing at his cheek.

Sasuke was sketching something in the notebook his psychologist had given him to help with venting his feelings instead of writing in it. To Sakura's knowledge he had only managed to write a page worth of text so far and it didn't look like it was going to change any time soon.

Sakura was just sitting there and staring at her ramen as if it held the universe in-between noodles, slices of pork and pieces of some vegetables. She had taken a week off in hopes of doing some pre-Christmas cleaning in the house and maybe helping Ino with planning the annual Christmas party. Both were rather menial tasks. They didn't keep her busy enough either. The restlessness was settling into her bones already and it was only the third day.

She sighed and was about to actually start eating her lunch before it got too cold to be any good when Sasuke suddenly stood up, knocking his stool over in the process. He was shaking and his Sharingan was activated, the tomoes spinning in a manner that was highly alarming.

"Sasuke, are you-" she didn't get to finish her question, because the instant he heard her voice, he bolted from the spot, leaving his food and notebook on the counter.

Naruto looked at her with a startled expression on his face. She shook her head to let him know that she had no idea what was going on as well. His eyes travelled from the place Sasuke had been occupying only a moment before to the direction in which he disappeared. Then he collected his papers and Sasuke's things, left some money on the counter and followed after their crazed friend, with Sakura hot on his heels.

They ran across the village, chasing after Sasuke's blazing chakra. It occurred to them after about five minutes of hooping from rooftop to rooftop that he was heading for the main gate. There had been something so raw and anguished in his expression back at the ramen stand that for a split second Sakura thought he was going to run away again. It had happened before a few times, after all, through his departure had never been as dramatic and fast.

When they finally caught up to him, he was simply standing in the middle of the road which lead outside of the village, gasping for breath and looking ahead of him with a look of someone who had just seen a ghost. The guards stationed on the post near the gate looked similarly distressed.

When her eyes locked on what they were looking at, she almost choked on air.

Someone was walking in their direction, through calling it "walking" was an overstatement. The person was dragging their feet on the snow-covered ground, stopping every once in a while and then resuming the journey. The clothes he or she was wearing were not weather-appropriate in the slightest and their entire body was shaking violently, whether from cold or exhaustion she didn't know.

Since the others seemed to be frozen in some sort of stupor, Sakura took it upon herself to make a move and actually do something.

When she was close enough, she could see that the person was male and so thin she briefly wondered how he was even able to keep moving, let alone standing, because his legs looked like they were going to snap any moment now. The amount to determination he was showing couldn't be more admirable, since his feet were bare and turning blue from the frostbite. It probably didn't even hurt at this point. The exposed skin of his arms and legs was red, just as his face, which indicated that he had been travelling like this for a long while.

He stumbled and he would have fallen down if Sasuke didn't appear out of nowhere at his side and didn't manage to catch him just in time. They both landed on the ground. Her friend looked like he was going to cry any moment now. He was clutching the man to him with so much strength Sakura was afraid he was going to break some bones if he didn't lessen his hold soon.

"Sasuke...," she started to say, but was once again interrupted when an aguished scream tore through Sasuke's throat. His eyes were frantic when they landed on her and there were actual tears running down his face as he rocked himself back and forth, the man still pressed flush against him.

"Help him... Sakura, please..." His voice was shaking as he begged her and she was down on her knees beside them in a flash.

Her hands hovered over the man, the green glow creating deep shadows on his sunken cheeks. She examined him carefully and her eyes grew larger and larger the more she learnt. He was malnourished, extremely dehydrated, his lungs were in shambles and he was partially blind. His fever was so high, she could almost hear sizzling in places his skin touched the snow. He had one foot in the grave already and if she didn't do something – and soon – he would be dead before he made it to the hospital.

Sasuke was mumbling nonsense under his breath while she worked. She didn't pay him any mind, her concentration devoted solely into snatching the man out of Death's grasp.

She was putting her all into it, because her friend obviously held this person dear to his heart and she would be damned if she gave up. She swore when his heart stopped. Sasuke was sobbing, but when he realized what had just happened, he fell into full-on hysterics.

"Nii-san, please! You can't die! You can't! Please! Nii-san, nii-san...!"

Sakura was rendered speechless.

Nii-san.

Sasuke's nii-san.

Uchiha Itachi.

She was failing to save a man who was everything to Sasuke.

He was dying and her chakra was doing nothing to make his heart beat again. She pushed harder, trying to jump-start it in any way she knew, but it simply wasn't working. She was acutely aware that if she were to lose this battle, no amount of love and therapy would be able to make her friend whole again. The injuries the older Uchiha had suffered were too severe though. She needed time and equipment, and she had neither of those. Even if she did, there would have been very little she would have been able to do.

There was only one thing left. It was experimental and it was risky, but she had nothing to lose at this point.

Sakura formed the appropriate hand signs and the seal on her forehead started to glow. She could hear Naruto gasp somewhere behind her, but she paid him no mind and ignored his pleas to stop what she was doing this instant.

"Yin Seal: Release!"

There was no other way to save the older Uchiha.

No other way.

The light from the seal trailed down her face and arms, leaving lilac-coloured lines in its wake. Then it moved onto Itachi, the pattern of lines curling around his body.

"Creation Rebirth!"

-o-o-o-

Sakura's eyes were glued to the heart monitor.

His heart hadn't stopped again, but it was still too early to determine it wouldn't do so in the nearest future. Until he woke up, she needed to be prepared for everything.

The green line went steadily up and down in a healthy, albeit slightly too slow, rhythm. The rest of the machinery was humming pleasantly and serving as a background noise to her inner musings, though her thoughts weren't exactly as calm as she was.

A soft beeping that accompanied said line and the murmur of Itachi's breath had calmed her to the point where she had been balancing on the line between sleep and consciousness. She had drunk a cup of strong coffee to get rid of the sleepiness and now she felt pleasantly at ease, even though the situation wasn't one she could label as relaxing.

Naruto had been forced to knock Sasuke out and he was the one who carried him to the hospital, while Sakura struggled with Itachi. If not for her ability to enhance her natural strength with chakra, she wouldn't have been able to even pick him up. As it was, they had somehow managed to arrive to their destination relatively quickly. Once there, Sakura had started to bark orders left and right before marching to the ICU.

Itachi and Sasuke were given a room each.

The older Uchiha had been unconscious and unresponsive, but at least he was still alive and it counted more than words could describe. She left him in the capable hands of Shizune so she could accompany Naruto to the Hokage Tower.

Of course Tsunade, who had been conveniently present in Kakashi's office at the time, had yelled herself hoarse when Naruto relied to them what had happened. Sakura had expected nothing less. She was aware that what she had done was actually kind of stupid and risqué, since no one had ever tried it, but she couldn't bring herself to regret it. It went unspoken that to her Sasuke's happiness was worth more than a few mere years of her life and if she hadn't done what she did, he would have probably never recovered. The two times he bid his brother farewell were bad enough and he certainly didn't need to live through it yet again.

But all of that happened hours ago.

It was half past three in the morning now. She had checked on Sasuke an hour or so ago, though she suspected he would be still asleep. The sedative she had given him after he got admitted was probably a bit too much and a little too potent, but she really didn't need a repeat of what had happened at the gates. Besides Itachi needed peace and quiet to recover, and Sasuke's hysterical crying would only succeed in rousing him into consciousness prematurely, which was admittedly the last thing she needed. He had been sleeping soundly when she had entered his room and didn't appear to be aware of what was going on, which was probably a blessing in disguise. Her conciseness was eating away at her for pulling off such a stunt on one of her best friends, but she reasoned with herself that he had done it two times before to her and for the same purpose – to protect.

A heavy sigh escaped her as she brought her hands up to massage her temples.

She couldn't fall asleep for multiple reasons tonight, though she highly doubted she would have been able to even if she didn't drink that cup of coffee and was actually at home in her bed. It was difficult to explain, but after months of keeping her guard up at all times and only succumbing to a light slumber at most when she simply couldn't go on without that moment of rest, her body got so jumpy and unaccustomed to the actual sleep, it couldn't force itself to do it. Tsunade had prepared for her some kind of calming tea that was supposed to help her relax, but it only ever succeeded in making her drowsy. After two weeks of taking it, Sakura had laid it off, claiming that she was okay and that she didn't need it anymore. Her shishou had given her a look that begged to differ, though she kept her opinion on the matter to herself. Sakura wasn't her subordinate anymore and it wasn't as if she could make her do something she wasn't willing to do on her own.

Her head snapped up at the faint sound of rustling sheets.

Her eyes were met with Itachi's hooded ones as he blinking at her languidly.

She breathed a sigh of relief. If he was awake, it meant he was going to be okay. Since the Creation Rebirth was a technique that was design to heal the user, not someone else, she had been afraid its effects on Itachi wouldn't be on par with what she had been expecting. Truthfully, they weren't, but they were still good enough.

Hands glowing green, she moved to examine him.

"You're in the ICU of Konoha Hospital. My name is Haruno Sakura. I'm your medic and your brother's friend," she murmured softly as she worked. "Hokage-sama... I mean, hn, Kakashi, because you obviously wouldn't know... Well, anyway, he said that you are under Konoha's protection now."

A smile threatened to split her face in two when she discovered her handiwork was holding up and the only problems she was left to deal with was the malnutrition and his state of complete exhaustion. He was too thin, a little too pale and the shadows under his eyes were definitely too deep, but that was about it. He was going to be fine.

"Sas-hy-ke?" He wheezed out with difficulty. The oxygen mask was damping the sound of his voice which came out rough and dry, as if he hadn't used it in a very long time, which was probably the case.

"He's sleeping in the next room," she responded while she checked his IV and vitals before going to the foot of his bed and starting to write the information down on the chart which laid there. "Naruto needed to knock him out shortly after we found you. He was delirious with worry, for which I can't really blame him. I mean, you have been presumed dead until a few hours ago and there's even an empty grave with your name on it."

He was observing her as she moved around the room with his chart in hand, babbling like an idiot. It was the middle of the night and she had a long day with one equally as long ahead of her, so it was a given she would try to talk the nervous energy out of her system. That's how she had been dealing with stress for as long as she could remember. Itachi, for his part, didn't seem to mind.

"You should probably go back to sleep," she said with a smile. She put his chart back in its place and returned to her seat. "I'll be there when you wake up again."

To her astonishment, his lips quirked into a small almost invisible smile before his eyes closed.