A/N Same old song and dance, new job, crazy hours, not much time to write. As I said, I am following the seasons, adding scenes that I felt should have happened in a perfect B&W universe.
* I am in need of a Beta for this story, PM if you want to try and deal with this hot mess.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of Syfy.
"I would keep running up that hill toward you," Helena thought to herself as she watched Myka suck her breath in as Mrs. Frederic started to turn her prison on. The blackness enveloping her very being, just in that split moment; those green eyes had flashed at a hint of ...forgiveness?
"Myka, if I could only could make a deal with God?" Helena breathless whispered, her world turning black with the flick of the wrist.
"If I could swap our places," Myka whispered to herself. Helena just gasped at the fleeting words as her vision turned to black. Helena ran her fingers through her hair, inhaling a short breath as she realized she was back inside the orb.
Mrs. Fredric raised an eyebrow at the whispered words from the young woman.
"I assumed that you would wish to see Ms. Wells," Mrs. Frederic said halfheartedly as she started to hand the pokey ball over to the runaway agent. The Sage raising an eyebrow as Myka's hand stilled, just hovering over the black orb.
"Why?" Myka whispered. "Why did you bring her here? Did you think in some twisted way that seeing her would cause me to toss out all I believe?" Myka voice rising with each word.
"Why, might be a question you should ask of yourself, why you believe you are a risk to the only home you felt an undying need to protect, a family that misses and needs you, Agent Bering. After all, it was you, just you and your words that prevented a worldwide ice age. It makes perfect sense that Ms. Wells would be able to accomplish what none of us has been able too."
Mrs. Fredric responded as she gently gripped Myka's wrist, setting the warm, plastic ball in her hand.
"It's just Bering now, I am no longer an agent," Myka choked out. Flashes of the cramped bedroom at the B&B, scenes of laughter and bonding at the table that sat in the sunroom. A gruff voice that she longed to seek approval from, the understanding glances from a friendly face. Her hand covering her mouth, trying to hide a grin from the quips of a red-headed little, almost sister.
Myka tried to gulp down the on-slot of feelings that tore at her rapidly beating chest, her throat dry as she tried to speak. This was her safe haven, her family book store, her childhood home. The one place she thought the warehouse held no sway over her.
She could not trust herself, her judgment, she had let lov… no, lust clouded her thoughts. How could anyone trust her, if she could not trust herself?
...
"Mother? What is all that commotion about?" Myka heard her father's words in a downcast tone as she headed up stairs with the last of her suitcases. Knowing full well he would want to know all that was going on.
"Really Warren!" Jeannie huffed that day, many months ago as she set the plate of scrambled eggs and hash down on the table in front of Myka's place at the table...
"Just leave her be," Jeannie hushed as she kissed Myka's crown of curls when she started to come into the kitchen.
"I just want to know why I have to clean out the old storeroom and for how long?" Warren gruffed as he almost bumped into his eldest daughter.
Myka's shifted to the right of her old chair at the family table, grumbling 'nothing' under her breath as they crossed the kitchen, them both sitting down, simultaneously lifted from the cloud of doom from the scrapple they put into their mouths at the same time. Jeannie hummed as she set the pans into the soaking water…"Good." she stated...not asked, to the two headstrong bulls at her table, ignoring the stirring of their soft grumbles.
"I don't want to talk about it," Myka stated as she stared into her father's eyes at his question of how long he would have to endure his cramped office from her moving back in. This was the first time in years that she was able to hold her own with the man.
"Not that long, I will start looking for a place as soon as I can," Myka stated in a monotone voice, wiping a bit of the hash from the side of her mouth. "I don't want to inconvenience you any more then I have," Myka bit back the strangled anger trying to claw up from deep inside her.
"Warren, for Pete's sake. Your daughter just got here," Jeannie complained. She stilled her beratement as she watched the frown lines ease upon her husband's forehead, both Myka and Jeannie noticed as he sat back. Sipping on his coffee, he shot both women a curt look, slowly followed by a minute grin. "Nonsense, you are my girl," Warren whispered, then looking over the rim of his coffee cup. "You stay as long as you need to. Besides, I could use the help; I've been backlogged on that last shipment,"
Myka gave her mom a crooked grin as she squeezed her daughter's shoulder, sitting down to join her family.
"Eat girl, you are still too damn skinny," Warren grumbled, then shooting Jeannie an frown as she patted him on the back.
"When you are ready to talk about it, we will be here," Jeannie smiled as she leaned over, kissing the top of Myka's head.
"WE?" they both coughed at the same time, Myka and Warren both sputtering into their coffee as they stared, wide-eyed at each other.
"Really, Mother, the girl has enough on her plate without bugging her about… whatever this is," Warren said as he waved his coffee cup at Myka... A small, understanding line stretched across his lips. Myka nodded a slight thank you to her dad.
Jeannie sat back, grinning to herself as she watched the small exchange between the two 'stubborn as mules' in front of her 'peas in a pod' she thought to herself.
...
"Do not let your own insecurities withhold you back from your destiny," Mrs. Frederic said.
"What?" Myka asked, dumbfounded as she stared at the caretaker, shaken out of her revere.
"You have three months with Agent Wells, " the caretaker said as she started to exit the book store.
"Handcuffs are unnecessary and a fear of Ms. Wells doing anything…. nefarious, will be the least of your worries. Do not let your pride and remorse cloud your heart, Myka." The caretaker said as she stopped in front of a shelve. She ran her finger over the spine of the book that had caught her attention.
"The Sleeper Awakens, how apropos," The caretaker smiled to herself. Clearing her throat, she turned to face the confused young woman.
" To ease any lingering doubts, Ms. Wells has been undergoing extensive rehabilitation while in my unique care," Mrs. Frederic's lip curled up, just a hair, all be it, if you could place a title on any of her moods, this may have been classified as a basic play at a bit of a smile. Mrs. Frederic's eyebrows never left a hint as to the mark of her true meaning as she retreated to the back of the old book store.
"Wait? What am I supposed to do?" The tall, runaway agent asked as the caretaker vanished. Her one arm outstretched, the cool, plastic ball humming against her palm.
"Right, totally forgot about that vanishing thing," Myka mumbled as she watched the warm light from the table lamp bounce off the black ball in her hand.
…
"So, as I am to understand this, because you are a bit of a height from me, and of a more supposed physical prowess. Others are to assume that I am the….sorry, Darling, what was the term again?" Helena whispered against the shell of Myka's ear, her hips firmly bucking against her palm.
The fulcrum of the thrusts had caused Myka to arch her back at the heavenly thrusts of her love, deep inside her. Helena punctuating each word with a firm press of her hip, Helena's lips and warm breath fell against Myka's neck. Her long legs convulsed and then wrapped, entrapping Helena's leg between her hips.
"Submissive top," Myka groaned. She then gripped tighter at the small of Helena's back, her short nails scraping at the tender skin, trying to urge her time traveler back to the rhythm that was sending her over the edge.
"Well," Helena tried clearing her throat, her eyes searching the forest of green "from my vantage point, one would assume that you are the submissive," Helena grinned as she stilled their ministrations. Staring into bright green eyes that had snapped open, Helena rested her weight on her one elbow, not daring to remove her digits from that glorious feel, enjoying the arresting, all-consuming feel of the her love's body trying to draw her deeper.
Helena hummed her longing as Myka groaned out her frustration
"Knock , knock" The soft thumps were drowned out by the rhythmic huffs, the desperate gasps for air against porcelain skin, the haze and slow rapping at her door slowly lifting Myka out of her perfect dream.
"What?" Myka growled as her dream fingers tangled into those midnight locks, tugging, if not, a half point between pleasure and erotic pain as Helena's two fingers scraped against the soft, folds that caused Myka to lurch her hips frantically up and forward into those firm, strong fingers...Her own fingers had subconsciously replaced Helena's. 'I am beyond shame and redemption" Myka's subconscious mind chimed, trying to compensate from the lack of the warm body she so desired...
Myka shook that last thought from her eidetic memory, "Damn fucking brain," she cursed under her breath as she gripped the black ball between her bosoms. She had fallen asleep in her bed, still fully clothed, the dream had been... so vivid. She would need a long, cold shower and a glass or three of her father's good Scotch. He subconscious was struggling with guilt, anger, betrayal and… lust.
"Myka, sweetie, father and I are getting ready for breakfast. Would you like bacon or scrapple?" Jeannie's voice was just a soft blur coming through the cracks of the door.
"Bacon is fine mom," Myka said automatically as she tried to shake herself into the here and now. Myka struggled between the realm of reality and her fucked up subconscious.
...
"You played me….you used me…" Myka whispered to the cold plastic ball that now sat on her bedroom night stand as she had showered, her bathroom door half ajar, just so she could keep one eye on the plastic sphere. "How could you smile to my face, press your lips against my skin, knowing all along that you would so readily destroy the world...destroy us?' Myka growled out in the shower, not realizing she scrubbed her skin just a bit harder with those last thoughts.
'Damn you, Helena, I trusted you' Myka whimpered with her last breath as her hips arched into her fingers. She had not realized that her fingers had slipped between her legs. She cursed herself as she shut off the water. She grabbed a towel, roughly drying herself. She stared at her reflexion in the mirror as she tried to tame her damp curls.
"I am such an ass; how the hell could I have been so blind. I would have never let anyone use me like that. Damn you, Helena, I trusted you!" Myka cursed, with each word, she combed roughly at her hair.
"I realize that, and it is my cross to bear, as long as I have a breath." Both Myka and Helena stilled at those last words. Myka gasped a shuttered breath as she watched the phantom figure from behind her bathroom door.
"I must have activated… it, you, when I twisted it?" Myka said sheepishly as she hurried to cover herself with her robe. Her head peaking around the door of the bathroom.
"So, bacon it is?" Helena laughed subconsciously as their eyes met. Helena blushed and cast her eyes down. "I suppose a bit of decorum is in order," She said as she quickly cast her eyes down, then turning her back on the agent.
"What the hell HG?" Myka growled as she grabbed at her robe, tugging the sash more tightly as she walked out of the bathroom.
The use of her initials did not escape Helena as she turned her back.
"What, exactly, is scrapple?" Helena forced herself to say. The silence in the room was as palpable as daggers to her heart as she bent down, the stack of books sitting in a pile near Myka's dresser had caught her eye. Myka drew a sharp breath as she watched Helena jerk her finger away from the tomes.
It looked as if a child was cringing from a finger that had been singed by a flame, both realizing in that split second as Helena's finger had passed through the solid object.
"It is like bits of ham pressed together, crisped up and served with eggs," Myka replied automatically as she tighten the sash on her terry-cloth robe. Their eyes meeting as Helena stood up, backing away from the taller woman as Myka entered the room.
"We are melting like chocolate under the sun...may I have your attention, please?"...The last of the riff from the song that was playing on Myka's IPad wafted through the room. The last of the words were pounding against Myka's heart. Helena's non-corporately form hitched a breath as she strained her ears to capture the last of the song echoing across the younger agent's lips.
"Can you breathe?" Myka asked, the almost stunned look in those forest greens had the almost non-entity shivering from the loss of physical contact.
"You wish my insights?" Helena asked in a rough breath as her eyes engulfed the young agent...no...Her heart's desire, before her.
'Can I have your attention… please' the last of the song pulsed against the skin of both women. Myka gulped, her edict memory rushing back to that day that she disobeyed orders, the start of her own deception to Artie and the beginning of her heart's bloom. After placing the grappler into the "HG Wells" aisle 207-45, Myka then looked over her shoulder, placing the 'post-it' note into the side pocket of her brown leather jacket as her phone rang, that song echoing through the dusty shelves. Her mind replaying their brief exchange of smiles in that otherwise stressed day.
"Aces" Helena's remark as Myka explained the IBM invention as Helena glossed over the sticky paper. Myka had fought back the urge to smile, turning her attention to the closet of the young man. "Why were you bronzed?" the only thought Myka could come up with as she tried to deflect from the beaming smile of her hero that sat three feet away from her.
...
Helena's mind drifted to the last time she had seen her, her Myka. Helena would pay anything, her penance, her soul for that last look, the last vision of Myka through unaltered eyes before she had fallen the younger agent. All that had remained were the soft brush of unconscious lips that had lain on the floor of warehouse 2.
Helena had sighed, cursing herself inwardly at her lack of strength as her lips caressed the sleeping agents soft lips. Helena had gasped a short breath as she felt the reflexive response from the unconscious agent... The one true love she had just tasered moments before.
"Look at me, please?" The softness, the almost heart breaking plea caused Helena to take a step back. It had been almost two days...a lifetime for all Myka thought. What was time like in that limbo prison of Helena's?
Helena's eyes saw the raging emotions in those green orbs, knowing full well Myka was mad at Mrs. Fredric for entrusting her ...this...Helena's life with the younger woman.
…
"Hello Irene, and how may I entertain you now from my meeting with…" Helena' halted her curt greeting, never wondering that someone other the Sage would twist her to a semi-conscious realty. Mrs. Frederick had been trying to help Helena with her demons, many sessions ending with talks of the green-eyed agent.
Helena heard Myka's soft mumbling, her shuttered breaths rolling off those full lips, Helena was frozen in place as she realized what was happening, she could not turn away as she watched Myka's fingers exploring, devouring the platitudes of her mound through the unzipped path of her jeans. Myka's breathe softly whispering for every touch of the English woman upon her skin.
"Oh" Was all Helena could whisper as she watched Myka pleasuring herself. Still in the same clothes she had seen Myka in from the first meeting in the book store. Helena blushed, turning immediately at the sight before her. Myka must have activated the sphere as she slept…
Helena had waited, silently at the corner of Myka's room. She was relieved when she heard the knocking on the door. She had managed to hide inside Myka's closet, easily slipping through the wood. When she heard the shower turn on, she tentatively pushed her hand through the wood barrier, marveling at the slight tingle as her form passed through it.
Helena drew a sharp breath, knowing it would be improper to stand silent as Myka was nearing the end of time in the bathroom. Many a morning had educated Helena that Myka would exit the room, naked, her skin a light pink from the warmth of the water and the scrub of honey and Lilac from the 'lofa'.
Helena would stretch under the soft, Egyptian cotton sheets, humming her approval and silently thanking the Gods for blessing her with the sight of this tall, green-eyed beauty before her. Her arm stretching out, to pull, to feel her love? against her skin. Helena warred with the feelings that tore at her heart. She had quilled Myka's declarations of love at every turn. Myka had thought it was her ego, her swagger, but Helena knew it was her way of trying to shield her heart from the Abyss she knew she was about to fall into...
Helena knew it would behoove her to let Myka know of her presents there in the room. But the dye was already cast. Helena had made small quips, hoping to defuse the tense situation.
""Mom, scrapple will be fine," Myka said through gritted teeth, her eyes never leaving Helena's as she held her hand against the door, double checking that it was locked.
"Okey dokey, dear, is there anything else you need?" Jeannie asked as she pressed her ear against the door. She could have sworn she heard two voices coming from Myka's room.
"Maybe you should respond?" Helena chuckled in a soft voice as she nodded to the door. Both watching as the doorknob turned just a bit, but not all the way.
'Thank God for locks' Myka whispered. Her head pressed against the door.
"Mom, I'm fine, just got out of the shower, tell dad I'll be down to help in about an hour," Myka replied against the door. Her knuckles turning white as she held the knob still. She glanced over at Helena, her eyes then focusing on the black orb sitting on her night stand.
Myka let out a held breath as she listened to her mother's footfalls down the stairs. "What...the… Hell!" Myka said, each word punctuated with her steps to the night stand.
Helena held her hands up in mock surrender, "I have no control over that," Helena nodded as Myka picked up the orb.
"Then what… how?" Myka was stumbling for words as she pressed the orb against her chest. Helena watched as the edges of the terry cloth robe hugged at the edges of the ball.
"I would surmise that you, in the throes of Morpheus, turned me on…" Helena was saying, her face freezing at the last three words.
"Helena… HG… I am so mad at you, you do realize that? You betrayed me, my trust; our… whatever the hell this was between us! And you have the gall to make sex jokes!" Myka's voice rising with each word till she stood in front of the time traveler. Myka gasped at her swift reaction, in a split second, she raised her hand, trying to slap Helena's face, her hand then tingling as it passed through the energy field, through Helena.
"God, I can't even hit you without hurting me!" Myka screamed, shaking her hand as she glared at the woman, then looking down at her hand as she shook it, trying to rid the tingling feeling that coursed through her hand.
Helena had jumped back, not from the blow from Myka, which she deemed was her lot; she deserved all the abuse, anger and frustration from Myka. But what stunned her most, was the vibration of Myka's hand passing through her.
They both stood in silence; Helena tentatively reached for Myka's hand, her eyes bleeding with the sorrow and pain that crushed at her heart as she tried to comfort the young woman.
"Please… don't," Myka whispered as she pulled her hand swiftly away from Helena, cradling her hand against her chest, resting it on the sphere she was still holding against her chest. "It's not like you can touch me," Myka said, her eyes downcast as she mumbled out the last of her words.
"I would rather be bronzed for three life times, then to have the knowledge that I could never touch… comfort you, in your time of need,"