Disclaimer: D. Gray-Man belongs to Hoshino Katsura.

Chapter Seventeen: Mechanical Angel

'What are you doing, Allen?'

A gruff, yet gentle voice.

'I'm drawing, Yu. What flower do you like? I'll draw one for you.'

His expression became withdrawn. Worried, I reached out to touch his face.

'What's wrong?'

He slowly took my hand and kissed my palm. Still a child, yet an adult in his actions.

'...Nothing. I prefer a lotus.'

A flash, of a pencil-sketched lotus in full bloom. My fingers paused.

'...Allen?'

I shook my head, giving him a smile.

'It's nothing...I like you best, Yu.'

He smiled, filling my heart with joy. That beautiful smile...

'Of course you do.'

I like Yu the best...But the best out of which others?

Allen groaned, throwing the covers off. He had a feeling that he dreamt, but he couldn't remember the content of the dream...Only the feeling that he had been pleasantly fulfilled. He plodded out of his room, seduced by the scent of food. The scene was becoming very common, ever since Allen moved into the dorm with Alma a week ago. Everyone had been surprised that Allen, while barking and snapping at Alma non-stop for his idiotic behaviour and optimism, had done nothing to send the other away.

Kanda had been in some manner, relieved that Alma got past the tough front Allen put up. At least Alma would be able to convince Allen that they meant well. What he was dissatisfied with however, was that Allen gave him no time of the day at all. Granted, he did not initiate much contact, but every time they did meet, Allen refused to acknowledge his presence. If he was mentioned, Allen referred to Kanda with 'Oi' or 'bastard'. It was beginning to get on Kanda's nerves.

Another surprising matter was that Lero, of all people, was allowed close proximity with Allen. In occasions when Lero felt playful and sat on Allen's lap, a big no-no for people who assumed Allen would snap, Allen surprised them all by sighing and while complaining that he was not Lero's babysitter, allowed the boy to stay where he was. Allen's select choice of companions baffled Lenalee and the rest, but they tried not to question it. At least, Allen acknowledged the companionship that he claimed to want to stay away from.

The boy, still unfamiliar to his surroundings, took to exploring the dorms. He ignored Alma's offer to show him around, feeling insulted that Alma thought him to be direction blind, though secretly he admitted to some part of himself that he was indeed, a bit of a genius at getting lost. His dorms were large, but that was no surprise considering the amount of students. Each room housed two students, and each dorm room had a kitchenette with the dining table, a snug living hall, a room with two beds and a common bathroom.

Now, he was faced with a dilemma. "...Was it left or right?" Allen stared at the junction before him, unsure which path took him back to his dorm room. If he could, he would like to return to his room without help. The white-haired boy did not feel up to meeting anyone yet. Their unwanted concern suffocated him. About to take a left turning, someone suddenly spoke up behind him.

"Your room's on the right."

Almost jumping out of his skin, Allen swivelled on the spot, his sight greeted with long ebony hair. His heart tightened painfully as if it was squeezed. He turned rigid, literally walling himself up against the other. Kanda stared at Allen, who looked as if he'd seen a ghost, crossing his arms immediately in a defensive posture. He had no memories of this person, but Allen felt his chest choke up in unknown emotions each time he sighted this one.

The only conclusion he could come to was that he hated this man; he must have. Otherwise why would he feel such pain at the very sight of him? Kanda did not know how to react as Allen coldly brushed past him, refusing to meet his eyes. Before he knew it, he was forcing Allen to face him, grabbing his shoulders tightly. Allen squirmed at the discomfort, but his silver eyes blazed defiantly in challenge. "Let go, jerk."

Kanda was barely holding himself back from really showing Allen what their true relationship was, but the advices of everyone, to let Allen take it easy, rang noisily in his mind. Torn between leaving Allen be or showing Allen what he meant to him, Kanda wavered for some time. Allen was confused at Kanda's lack of reaction, but he did not speak. After what seemed like a long while, Kanda released Allen. Although he wanted to tell Allen the truth, it was for the best that he left Allen alone first.

"..." Allen walked away without saying another word, leaving Kanda to stand there alone.

School had been a busy affair for Allen. He could not really remember anything, but he felt that going to school was a first time experience for him. Did he feel this way because he was amnesiac, or did he somehow sense that before, he had never attended school? The people of his class were informed of his 'ailment' and were friendly, but Allen did not care about them. To him, the world was still a cold place.

A world which had once forsaken him for his arm.

He knew that his arm was no longer that red monstrosity. He did not know how it happened, yet he felt that it had been that way for some time, a normal arm. Now the world was trying to draw him back into its embrace, but scarred by the cruelty of his fellow human beings, Allen was reluctant to trust. He refused to yield himself to the world yet, instead choosing to draw some into his own walled-up garden, like Lero. He would never seek out Lero; it was always the other who came looking for him.

"Morning, Allen!"

Getting angry at Alma's chirpy voice was how Allen activated his brain in the morning. Allen did not know where did he gain the ability to tolerate Alma, but he managed. Somehow...No matter how angry he got at Alma, he just gave up in the end because it was too tiring to be angry at Alma's antics. Allen just sat down at the table, looking at the breakfast Alma cooked. The boy shivered as he looked at Alma squirt a generous amount of mayonnaise on his own breakfast.

No matter how many times he saw it, he would never get used to it.

This was becoming a habit, something Allen feared. This act of breakfast together, going to school and coming back, this routine...Allen tried to distance himself. If he got too used, too close...It would hurt so much when it would be ripped away from him. If he could return to his dreams...He felt that he would be safe in it.

"Niisan...so it's true?"

To Lenalee's worried expression, Komui had no choice but to nod. "You saw it for yourself, Lenalee. A fracture takes about one month to heal. Yet Allen's arm is already fully recovered. Also...That mark on his back...It is without a doubt. Lvellie has accomplished what he set out to do."

The girl looked downcast. "...So the mark on his back is the Innocence? He's synchronised with it?"

"Yes...Lvellie needed an Exorcist to lure a woman out. We have yet to know who this woman is, but the fact remains that both Allen and Kanda are synchronised users. That woman may come for them and we have to be prepared. The evidences are now being made into order and the court case is proceeding. However, Lvellie is missing and we have to be extra wary of what he might do," Komui mused.

"...Make sure Allen is never alone. He...And every one else is unaware that he's synchronised."

"Niisan...Will his life...?" Lenalee could not continue the sentence. She could not bear to imagine if Allen would leave Kanda behind again. The ominous words she once heard about parasitic type conformers echoed in her mind. Komui patted her back soothingly, putting Lenalee at ease. "It's alright. The corrosive effects only apply when the body is in need of extensive healing, which is handled by the Innocence automatically in order to protect its host, or when the Innocence is activated and used to the extremes. In this case, Allen will most likely never find the need to use his Innocence and so, he will live a normal lifespan as the rest of us."

"I see...Niisan, when is niisama going to return? I'm sure he wants to see Allen since we've rescued him." Lenalee's query was met with a feverishly sweating Komui. He coughed and said, "That man never says a thing and please, I'm praying he stays away for as long as possible. He brings me nothing but trouble each time he comes. I'm already thanking heavens he no longer collects debts like a beggar collects coins."

Lenalee giggled at Komui's lament. "But you love niisama, don't you? Isn't that why you married him?"

Komui wrinkled his nose in distaste. "It doesn't mean I have to like everything he does. Now run along, Lenalee, or you'll be late for class." Lenalee nodded and headed off to her own class. The Black Order University was vast, not only owning a university but also an elementary, junior high, and senior high sectors. Even facilities like the hospital were actually on their land. Right now, she, Kanda, Lavi and Alma being nineteen were in their first year of university.

Lero and Road, though fourteen, were allowed to skip a grade and join Allen, who was slotted in the third year of junior high. Jasdevi, owing to their older age, were in second year of senior high. Tyki was looking for a job with one of the departments of the Black Order University. Apart from Allen's amnesia, everything was settling into its desired position. Lenalee smiled brightly. Today was a great day.

"Allen forgot his lunch today. Do you want to accompany me to deliver it?" Alma invited Kanda along, trying to create more chances for Kanda to see Allen. It was surprising that Allen was especially hostile to Kanda, even when the Japanese had not done anything yet to merit such treatment. Kanda wanted to see Allen, even though he was also reluctant to have himself ignored by the boy.

"...Che, fine."

"Aah, I want to go too!" Lavi cheered and tagged along with the group. He knew how Allen's change shocked everyone, but in these few days the boy was warming up to them. He hugged Allen yesterday and all Allen did was complain, but didn't push Lavi away as he did in the beginning. The trio crossed the school grounds from the university sector to the junior high sector, Alma already knowing Allen's classes by heart. Even as they approached, they could see Lero, Road and Allen come out of the classroom.

"Allen!" Alma called out, waving.

To their shock, Allen's face was decorated with a beautiful smile as he turned to answer Alma. Kanda was rooted to the ground, seeing Allen's smile for the first time in a while. Even Alma was surprised, but he simply grinned and asked, "What's up? You look happy." Allen hesitated for a while, but finally he said, "Narein has come to visit me." Kanda immediately growled at the mention of Narein. Allen seemed to notice Kanda and turned sour.

"Since when did you know that guy?" Kanda asked, unable to hide his displeased expression.

"Hn...It's none of your business. But if you are curious...I met Narein in the hospital when I woke up. He treated me well, even though I didn't trust him at first. But...There was something about the way he talks to me. He makes me feel safe...Safe enough to open my heart to. Unlike you," Allen sneered, causing Kanda's face to change colour.

The young man snatched Allen's hands, startling the latter as he was pinned against the wall. Lero hid behind Lavi in fear of the unfolding event. Knowing the volatile Kanda, and even more ferocious Allen when he was angered, the situation might just explode in their faces. Road simply watched; she liked Narein and she was angry at Kanda still, but Kanda had nothing to worry since Narein was just a friend. Not that she would clear up the misunderstanding now, just to spite Kanda. What the Japanese lost in Allen, he would have to work hard to regain, because of what he had done to the poor boy; that was what Road thought.

"Why do you keep going against me? What the hell did I do?"

Allen turned his gaze aside, refusing to look at Kanda. "I just hate looking at you!"

Kanda's grip tightened around his wrists, causing Allen to slightly whimper. "And why is that, moyashi?"

"You disgust me! Each time I see you, I feel terrified...! My chest hurts, and I don't know why! I just know it's your fault!" Allen yelled and shoved Kanda away in a burst of adrenaline, but he slipped and almost fell if not for someone catching him at the last moment. Narein whistled, hoisting Allen to his feet. "Be careful, Allen. What's wrong?" He had arrived just in time to see Allen stumbling away from Kanda and moved in time to catch the boy.

Allen tried to stand but winced when he put too much weight on his right leg. "Ow...I think I twisted my ankle..." Kanda, in concern, tried to approach Allen but Narein was already down on his knees. He gently took Allen's leg and pressed down around his calf and ankle. Allen uncharacteristically whined and mumbled, "Please touch it more gently..." Narein smiled softly as he squeezed Allen's ankle a few more times, completely unaware of the jealous gaze coming from Kanda who barely held himself down seeing his moyashi being simply touched like that.

"Just hold on a bit...I think it just needs to be wrapped for a few days. Let's go to the infirmary and I'll patch you up," Narein announced, finding it just a minor case of a twisted ankle. He lent his shoulder to Allen, ready to help Allen get to the infirmary. Allen let out a surprised yelp when he felt someone sweep him off his feet instead. Kanda had a scowl on his face, but no way was he going to let Narein touch what was his any further.

"Put me down, bastard!" Allen snapped, struggling in Kanda's grasp.

"Shut up and just let me carry you there, moyashi!" Kanda retorted, making his way to the infirmary, regardless of the gallery following after him. Kanda wasn't so stupid as to be clueless. When Allen yelled at him just now, he understood that it wasn't as if Allen was unresponsive towards him...Allen did feel something for him, and because he could not understand his feelings, the only way for him to respond was to fight it. Kanda unconsciously increased the strength in his arms which contained Allen. He would persist until Allen understood.

'...What a nostalgic scent...I wonder why...?'

Allen kept quiet, his nose buried in Kanda's shirt. 'Even though he makes my heart hurt so much...I feel terribly...at ease in his arms...Why?' He was horribly confused by his conflicting thoughts, but lulled by the familiar scent from Kanda, Allen's eyes slowly closed as he went into the realm of unconsciousness.

Kanda, wondering why Allen was silent, looked down to find the boy already sleeping in his arms. His sleeping expression was almost irresistible. Kanda held Allen closer to himself, relishing in the sensation of the petite body which fit perfectly in his arms. He glared at Narein, who was surprised by the sudden attention. "Don't touch moyashi...ever," the Japanese declared his intentions, threatening away any he considered his potential rival. Narein, being the only one among the group now who was not Awakened, can only look at Kanda in confusion as he did not understand why Kanda said so.

I giggled a bit, causing him to look down at me in surprise.

'What is it?'

I shook my head, smiling at him.

'It's nothing...You're warm, Yu...I like it.'

Yes...Being in his arms felt like the best thing. It made me feel protected, even though he was simply a child with his arms around me.

'Che...Holding you feels good too.'

I blushed when he smiled in a teasing manner.

'Yu...I love your smiles. They're beautiful.'

'Allen...I love your smiles too. That way, I know you are happy.'

I snuggled closer into his embrace.

'As long as I am with Yu, I am happy. But Yu...'

'What?'

I turned around to look at him properly.

'When did we first meet? I can't remember...'

Though I know I've always been in this world with just Yu...A small world belonging only to us.

'Hn...I've known you since before you were born. We've always been together.'

I blushed again.

'You say such embarrassing things easily!'

He only smirked.

'It's true, Allen. You know it.'

I do...? Even if...I can't recall?

Allen snapped awake. It took a while for him to see that he was in his own room. There...He had the dream again. As with his other dreams, he could not remember. However, the sense of warmth and gentility from the dream calmed him. At that moment, Alma chose to enter the room. "Oh, you're awake Allen? You were sleeping pretty deep just now! Since you wouldn't wake up, Road got you excused for the rest of the classes while Yu delivered you home!" Alma mentioned in one breath.

"That bastard..." Allen frowned, frustration returning to haunt him as he wondered about his conflicting emotions about Kanda. Alma looked at him, dying to ask a question which was fed with his curiosity. Being the silly person that he is, Alma asked anyway. "Allen...I've been curious, but why don't you ever call Yu by name? Or surname, at least?"

Allen snorted. "He calls me moyashi, so why should I call him by name? Bastard is just right for him."

'Besides...I feel that I'd lose something if I called him by name, but gain something else...But what? Why do I feel this way? Is it my forgotten memories? Am I failing to see something? I'm so afraid when I think about it...So scared...of remembering.'

Seeing Allen silent made Alma uncomfortable. He decided to distract Allen with one thing. "What do you want for dinner, Allen?"

Lero frowned, glaring at the homework before his eyes. He can't believe it; Timcanpy still hasn't figured out what he did wrong yet! Here he was, though having sulked and resisted Timcanpy, still very much in love with the handsome bastard who did wrong by him and the blonde had the nerve to yet realise what he did. He seriously would consider dating someone else, damn it! Even as Lero was driving himself crazy over the issue, the person he did not want to see most strode through the classroom door as if it was the most natural thing to do.

"What are you doing here lero?"

If the situation wasn't so serious Timcanpy would've said that Lero was so cute acting like a cat with its hackles raised. He had mulled over the issue for a long time, but he came to no answer. So the blonde decided that the next best thing to do was to ask Lero directly. "Lero, I..." Timcanpy was abruptly cut off when Lero stood up and turned away from him. "Lero has nothing to say to you," the boy quietly stated.

"Lero, stop being so stubborn..."

Once again, Timcanpy was cut off, but by Allen this time.

"Lero...I need help getting to the lab," Allen mentioned, motioning to his bandaged foot. Lero pasted on a smile and lent his shoulder to Allen. The both of them exited the classroom, silently watched by Timcanpy. Road sidled up to Timcanpy, feeling sorry for the blonde. She had no idea what Timcanpy did to make Lero that angry, but in some manner thought Lero shouldn't be so cruel to the blonde. Unless what Timcanpy did was of course, on par with what Kanda did to Allen.

"Aren't you going to chase him?"

The blonde slowly made his way to the classroom door. "...Lero's not going to listen to me any time soon." Road noticed the loneliness shrouding his silhouette. Someone should talk to Lero to clear this matter up soon, and without her knowing, that was exactly what someone was doing now.

"That'll be the last time I bail you out."

Lero was surprised when Allen talked to him. The latter looked bored and at the same time mildly annoyed; that was when Lero knew his actions crossed the invisible line that Allen drew on their friendship. The orange top meekly nodded and turned his glance to the floor. Seeing that reaction, Allen sighed and took his arm off Lero's shoulder, prompting a sound of surprise. "Can you walk without help, lero?"

"Tch, I'm not that weak. It's just a sprained ankle; two days off it was enough rest. More than that, you..." Liquid platinum slid over Lero's form. "...He loves you, you know that?"

"W-What?" Lero squeaked, shocked that Allen, of all people, broached the topic with him. Allen let loose a sigh, wondering why he'd allowed someone this troublesome get close to him. "...I can tell. He loves you and you know it. You love him too," Allen continued as if the topic was unimportant. Lero harrumphed and pouted, wondering if Allen was going to lecture him for his irresponsible prolonged ignorance of Timcanpy.

"So what, Lero? How can you say for sure that Lero loves Timcanpy?"

"Because you're waiting, idiot. You could've easily solved the problem by telling him what's wrong, but instead you chose to wait. You love that guy and believe that he'd understand you well enough to figure out the problem, that's why you'd rather wait for his answer. Well, it's bothersome because it's causing trouble for the rest of us. You already know he loves you...Just tell him what's wrong and end this idiotic farce," Allen barked, scolding Lero, but his intentions were gentle.

Lero almost cried hearing them.

"Besides...The people you love may not exactly be the brightest bulb on the planet, so it's a waste of time trying to let them figure it out." The white hair swished as his head was thrown back in a mocking laughter, but Lero suddenly understood that this was Allen's way in trying to lighten the mood and cheer him up. No matter if his memory was still lost; Allen's kindness came from the depths of his heart. Lero's lips curled up into a big grin.

"Thank you, Allen!"

"Go on back to class first, idiot," Allen waved lazily and strode out to the courtyard, watching the leaves drifting in the air. Autumn was here, red and gold and brown filling his vision. The boy sat down on the bench, feeling a bit uneasy. Something was approaching and his senses were seeking it out instinctively. In a satirical sense of irony, Kanda came out from the building opposite the courtyard with Alma, Lavi and Lenalee.

"Yu, what are you doing with Mugen again?" Lavi asked, skipping around Kanda as he did. Kanda didn't bother looking at the redhead, but he answered all the same, "...A part of myself was kept in Mugen before I was Awakened. Even if it's not there anymore, I thought maybe it'll help jog moyashi's memories. He was strangely obsessed with Mugen last time I brought it to the facility."

"I see! You really want Allen to remember that badly, eh?" Lavi grinned and teased.

"Do you want me to cut you up with it?" Kanda threatened, looking pissed.

Lenalee smiled as the guys were jostling each other, but inside herself, she was worried. It was good that Kanda kept Mugen near himself; because someone might target the Innocence, if anything her brother said was to go by. Kanda knew nothing of the situation, neither did Lavi nor Alma, but that was because Allen's condition had to be kept a secret for the moment. Kanda would surely be able to defend himself, but not Allen. He was vulnerable, and Lenalee hoped he would be safe at least in the Black Order University. Until Lvellie is found and caught, none of the Innocence users were safe.

Granted, there was no one who saw Kanda synchronise with Mugen and was able to inform Lvellie, but that despicable man's information network was wide, so they must take their preventive actions one step ahead of their opponents. Alma's voice distracted Lenalee from her thoughts when he spotted a familiar white head. "Allen, skipping class?"

Alma called out to his roommate, who turned around and faced them, mouth opened with a cynical response ready to fly out when Allen's eyes locked onto the katana at Kanda's waist. Seeing his reaction, Kanda approached with a poorly hidden eagerness. "What's with the freeze-up, moyashi?" He was right; Allen did react towards Mugen. Allen automatically stepped back in response.

"...Go away...! I don't want to see you..."

However, it seemed obvious to Lavi that Allen's control over his voice was slipping. Silver eyes betrayed anxiety, trembling even though they were solely focused on Mugen. Allen's voice was wavering, even his whole body was subject to the invisible currents jolting down his spine. His nervousness had not gone unnoticed by Kanda as well, who took Mugen and held it up.

"What, do you remember this?"

"Stop it, I hate it...What is this...My head...hurts!"

Allen had his head in a grip, trying to stop the sensation of something invading his mind. There was something about that katana that awakened several images in him, gone in a fleeting moment, too fast to capture. The boy slowly shook his head, stepping away from Kanda. The pain was unbearable; it was forcing his mind apart for something within. Tears flooded those beautiful platinum eyes, childish fear overtaking him. He was going to lose his only sanctuary within his thoughts...

"Please...Yu, save me!"

Kanda barely suppressed the sound of shock stuck in his throat when Allen shouted, but what happened after was more shocking. Behind him, he could hear Lenalee gasp. For metal frames had burst forth from Allen's back. Rather than metal frames...It was like wings. Wings of steel, stripped of feather and flesh. Metallic bones held by joints of cogwheels, the eerie whirring sound too loud to ignore, strands of wires dangling in bits and pieces from the frame of metal wings.

'Yu...'

Brunette hair, scarless face. A young child standing on the other side of the mirror.

My reflection. But it cannot be.

'What's wrong?'

The child that my love was, with his sleek ebony hair, yet his eyes belied greater wisdom.

'Who is that in the mirror?'

Fufu...Surprise? XD Oh, and the mystery woman that Lvellie is looking for...Here's a hint! ;D Everyone knows her!