A/N:

OKAY wow this is taking me longer to write than I thought! I'm sorry this took so long it's just some days I can't write and I've been super busy lately! I'm going on vacation in about...five hours.. so I wanted to get this out before I went so hopefully I can write on the way down and get this next chapter out sooner! This chapter was...idk...but next chapter they'll be arriving in Suna because tbh I hate writing traveling scenes and I just wanna get to the good stuff so I hope you guys agree! Lastly, please excuse any spelling or grammar mistakes because like I said I leave for vacation in five hours so I really don't have to time to edit this! This is still dedicated to kelzen on tumblr and I love her!

I do not own Naruto and all rights belong to Kishimoto

He was late, as always. That never seemed to change.

Tired of waiting for the copy-nin, Sakura placed her canvas backpack on the ground beside her and squatted next to it. Before she found out Kakashi was her partner for this vacation she was actually excited to go. Now, she was more hesitant than anything. Why had he acted so cold? Tracing her memories, she tried to think of a single instance where she may have upset him and quickly came up empty handed. Since the war, Sakura seemed to only run into Kakashi when handing in mission reports to Tsunade, or in Jounin meetings. Never did they exchange more than a nod. Why? When had they become distant? Nothing seemed to add up. Kakashi dropped off the radar after the war and if Sakura recalled correctly, only took S-rank missions requested by other villages.

Though she didn't have room to talk. As Sakura watched Naruto and Sasuke reach god-like statuses, she knew that they were in a completely different league, so she decided to push herself out of her comfort zone. She immediately requested to join Anbu and Tsunade held no qualms, writing her appetence's name on the roster the next day. Training had been difficult, grueling even, to the point of not only physical but mental exhaustion. She was worked until she no longer held value to her name, to her face, to her body. Sleep no longer rid of her fatigue and she had come to assume every day was her last. At first the murder had bothered her, she was used to saving lives not taking them, but with time it had become a mindless form of release. To kill was to survive.

Sakura couldn't escape Kakashi even in Anbu, where he was regarded as legend. Hatake Kakashi's records were bellowed into the trainee's ears and he was a common role model for most members.

"You're Haruno Sakura, right?" the voice belonged to a young man, no older than 22, and the look on his eyes made Sakura want to gouge the orbs out of his head. She was getting tired of this.

"Yeah." She quipped over her shoulder.

"Well, Kakashi-senpai was your sensei right? What was he like? Do you think you could introduce me to him?"

"I'm busy." Sakura returned as she turned on her heel and strode out of the room and straight to the training grounds. Her fist collided with the first tree without reserve which caused it to immediately bend in half, taking down three others in its wake. When would she be recognized on her own accord? When will she finally stop living in her teammate's shadows? When w-

"Oi! Sakura!" Her daydream was broken by the sound of a smooth voice a few yards away. Before she was able to wave, Sakura realized her hands had been clamped so tightly into fists that she had to wiggle her fingers around before she could move them without any remaining stiffness.

"Hey Genma, what're you doing here? Isn't it early for someone like you to be up?"

"Ouch, what's that supposed to mean?" the man jogged through the remaining distance separating him from the kunoichi and as he stood in front of her his smile was playful and bright, it's contagiousness immediately spread to Sakura as she couldn't help but laugh along with him. Genma used the pads of his thumb and pointer finger to pinch his senbon and move it to the other side of his mouth; it was something he often did when he was nervous. Luckily Sakura didn't know that. "I'm just coming to see you off, since I figured Kakashi would be late, you could use some company. I also wanted to see if you'd like to go on a date with me when you get back?" The last sentence was spoken so casually along with the previous one that Sakura had almost missed it. A date? With Genma? This is what she wanted right?

"Gen-"

"Yo." Behind Sakura the bushes rustled as Kakashi easily pushed through the tangle of leaves and branches, disregarding the time and effort it probably took to prune them. He was dressed in his usual jounin attire, and wore the standard issue canvas backpack identical to Sakura's.

He'd been watching them again and this time he didn't feel half as guilty about it. Kakashi watched as Genma left his apartment bright and early to meet Sakura at the gates, and the three other women he stopped to flirt with on the way. When he heard Genma ask Sakura on a date, while he eavesdropped from the bushes, Kakashi choked. His eyes burned into the back of Sakura's head as she hesitated to answer and when he knew she was going to agree to Genma's proposal Kakashi's body moved forward on its own and the only thing he could make his mouth say was "yo", because he couldn't hear his thoughts over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. As Kakashi stood before the two his mind raced and he was far too light headed to try to keep up with it.

"Kakashi you're late as always! We were supposed to leave twenty minutes ago!" Sakura stomped back over to her backpack and slung it over her arms and securely onto her back. "Sorry Genma, I'll see you later, okay?" She could tell he wasn't happy, but hopefully the sweet smile she flashed him could soften whatever blow had just been dealt.

00

00

When Kakashi's sandal collided with the 565th tree branch of the day he'd had enough of the silence hanging between them. Indeed he had been trying to space himself from her, but he didn't like the notion of Sakura purposely avoiding him. The thought was selfish, he knew it, but some part of him found it extremely unsettling when the tables were turned.

In about two days they would reach Suna and that gave Sakura more than enough time to drag out this awkward silence with Kakashi for all that it was worth. It was true she was silencing herself around him in revenge of his shortness with her the other day and it seemed childish but she couldn't help but lay awake in bed that night trying to think of ways to apologize for something she didn't do.

As darkness surrounded the two ninja, Sakura paused on a branch a few trees ahead of Kakashi. As her eyes met his she knew he was going to suggest the same thing.

"Here is good." Kakashi's voice quickly faded as he jumped down from his perch and landed on the grassy patch below them. The small clearing was surrounded by a thick layer of trees and the grass was only slightly over grown, a perfect place to camp safetly for the night. Sakura landed a few paces behind him and quickly began to unpack her sleeping bag, rolling it out and climbing in after she removed her boots. Though they weren't verbally communicating, she knew Kakashi would insist on taking the first watch just like he always used to do. The pink haired kunoichi knew she was right when Kakashi sat cross legged under a nearby tree, allowing his eyes to lazily scan around the clearing, hiding a yawn behind his palm as he did so. He would wake her in a few hours to switch roles, so Sakura closed her eyes and allowed her sore body to settle and allowed her breathing to even out. She was asleep within two minutes.

Kakashi's eyes managed to linger on the trees surrounding the small clearing until Sakura fell asleep. Once the pinkette's breathing evened out and her body stilled, the copy nin's single eye settled on her face. It was hours Kakashi sat like that, staring at Sakura's face with a blank mind. Every once in a while his heart flutter and his fingers would itch and it was only until her smell of sweet pea had blinded his sensitive nose that he noticed that he was sitting beside her, knees rustling the edge of her sleeping bag. His mind screeched at him to move, get away, flee to a safe distance, but his body stayed frozen, as if he was under Sakura's spell and there was a part of him that was content with that. How did he feel towards Sakura? He'd only talked to her for the first time in years two days ago, so he doubted his current state was the result of anything more than confusion. Even still, he couldn't deny he felt as if he wanted to get to know Sakura more, know what exactly happened during the three year span he spent absent from her life. He wanted to know the story on how the hell she ended up in Anbu. He had no doubt that was why the innocent sparkle had been swiftly stolen from Sakura's eye, and replaced with the same unforgiving edge his eyes carried.

Kakashi's body loomed above Sakura's as his hand slowly left his side and stroked her pink hair.

"Sakura…" the word was carried from his mouth on a quiet breath, allowing the word to remain almost inaudible. What had not changed had been his impulse to protect this girl. He always knew Naruto and Sasuke would evolve into something incredible, with or without his help. But to him, Sakura was something that needed to be nurtured and protected and he hated himself for not being able to do that for her. It was something that he regretted and often pushed it out of his mind whenever it came up. Kakashi's fingertips traced the purple seal on Sakura's forehead and he smiled. It was a reminder that even though he had failed to watch over her, she had found success along the way and had truly become a legendary kunoichi. The pads of his fingers now tickled over the bridge of her nose and down the slopes of her cheeks and when they arrived at her lips he caught himself wetting his own, his body seemed to be slightly rocking. Kakashi looked on from what seemed like another person's point of view as his thumb brushed over Sakura's bottom lip, and then moved to the circle her top. He could feel his stomach clench when his fingers glided down her neck, her skin was flawless there and all he could imagine was how sweet it would taste and how he wanted nothing more than to mark it. Maybe he could…

"K-Kakashi?" the voice belonged to a sleepy Sakura, who was currently watching as Kakashi's thumb rubbed circles over her collar bone. He had been caught and it would be foolish for him to pretend like he hadn't been. Withdrawing his hand, Kakashi sighed and stood from his cross legged position.

"It's your turn to keep watch. I'm going to try an-"

"Don't. Don't even try and brush me off again. It's not fair…" The sleeping bag made a loud ruffling sound as Sakura sat up and crawled forward so she was able to catch Kakashi's wrist as he walked away.

Kakashi's heart ached and he couldn't help but cave under the tight grasp on his wrist. His head turned and faced her and a crinkle formed at the corner of his eyes as he gave her a reassuring smile. He wanted to lie and say everything was fine, just like that day on the roof of the hospital when she was so young and he had just stopped Naruto and Sasuke from not only killing each other but her as well. Maybe it was because of that Kakashi couldn't lie.

"Okay." His voice was calm now, but its whispered tone was reassuring enough that Sakura released his wrist, her fingers lingering a second too long. His dark olive green sleeping bag was quickly rolled out beside hers and he folded his long body into it. Sakura caught herself staring, but her eyes stayed on his figure, she wasn't a young girl who was going to be ashamed of looking at men, even if that man was her ex-sensei.

Silence fell between the two and Sakura couldn't lie to say it wasn't awkward. Why did she care so much about Kakashi brushing her off? Over the past few years she hardly even gave him a thought, and when she did it was usually forced upon her by a third party. At the same time she had always looked up to Kakashi and relied on his protection, especially when she was younger. Naruto and Sasuke would be busy taking the brunt of missions while Sakura somehow always ended up singled out as an easy target, and every time Kakashi had appeared and saved her from the enemy. His protection gave her a feeling of comfort she only also felt in Naruto; it was a feeling of complete trust.

"Tell me why you joined Anbu" it was not a question but rather a command, though Kakashi's tone betrayed him for something soft and pleading.

"I…I joined to test myself I guess. To see if I was something other than useless or a tag along of team seven. I joined to help establish a name for myself and to also further the one I had going for me as a medic, and I did. It wasn't easy, as you know, anbu is tough. I've killed hundreds of men and women because I was simply told to do so, sometimes thinking about it confuses me but mostly I ignore it. Anbu became my release, my home." Kakashi was now watching Sakura intently, his eyes never flicking away from hers once, and she knew it was to detect any lies. Sakura told none.

"You were taken out of rotation." It was another statement with an underlying command of an explanation.

"Yeah…I was…a friend of mine…I killed him. He was in anbu too and I'd become so…cold…I couldn't tell who was who anymore. Killing felt good and blood was warm, that's all I knew. During a mission Akihiro slipped up and got in the way…by the time I noticed he was trapped in my jutsu it was too late…" the story no longer disturbed her as much as it used to, and she was able to tell it while keeping eye contact. Any amazing feat compared to her previous panic attacks. "He really looked up to you, you know. Akihiro was always trying to beat your records and his dream was to meet you. That's probably why he always stayed so close to me…because of you."

Kakashi wished he could feel guilty for what happened, but he simply couldn't. The boy hung around Sakura, his ex-student, because of him, and was later killed by her for simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was his fault, but he couldn't bring himself to feel bad. He felt sick in the head. There must be something wrong with him. Kakashi's heart did go out to Sakura though, since he could truly understand the feeling of killing someone you cared about. He understood the sadness of killing a team mate. It was suddenly apparent that he and Sakura were no longer so different, each were hardened by loss, but motivated to move on every day by the ones that continue to support them. Kakashi reached out his hand and covered Sakura's own with it, rubbing his thumb gently over her knuckles. He didn't dare speak, for this silence was no longer awkward, but comfortable and filled with understanding.

Kakashi quickly fell asleep, his body relaxing in his current position. He didn't notice when Sakura's slim fingers slowly intertwined with his large rough ones.

A/N: thanks to everyone who reviewed last time! But of course, like every chapter, I'm going to urge you guys to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! GO GO GO ! Please and thanks!