Disclaimer: If I owned South Park, you wouldn't be reading this.
Author's Note: Sorry about how long this took – but of course, you can read all about that in the very important Author's Note. Anyway, I've made a ton of Kyle/Cartman videos for Youtube (and some of them got deleted, unfortunately), so check those out if you like. The link is on my profile. And please, review this!
Cartman's POV
Now that he's gone, I can finally allow myself to breathe easily, the first I've been able to in the whole three hours he was over at my house. Lack of proper oxygen must have made my brain cells die, I still can't believe I took him into the basement and showed him my best poem. Well, the best poem about my life anyway. When I'm writing about him, my poems are a lot better. Luckily I didn't find one of those first. I wonder if he's read my poem yet. I should call him…wait, what am I thinking? No I shouldn't! I just want to. But, I always get what I want, so I probably will call him…later, though. I wish I had his cell phone number, I don't want to call his house. I hate it when my friend's parents answer the phone and then want to talk for hours about how my life is…why do they care? They're not my parents!
"Time for dinner, honey!" Mom calls down the stairs. Oh, boy. Another chance for me to gain a few pounds and be laughed at. Don't get me wrong, I love to eat and then not exercise…I just hate what comes with it. I know I could change it, if I really tried, but I haven't and probably never will. What's the point? What am I working towards? It's not as if Kyle ever expressed an interest in skinny guys…or guys at all, for that matter. But I bet I could lose the weight if he had. "Honey..! Dinner..!" I sigh, push the chair back, and head upstairs. I'm not really doing anything terribly important down here anyway…it's probably unhealthy to be locked in a room with your thoughts for an extended periods of time. I'll call Kyle after dinner.
Kyle's POV
I'm sitting in my room, in the dark, thinking about what I just discovered. That I, Kyle Broflovski, am in love with one heartless soul named Eric Cartman. Mind you, he doesn't seem so heartless anymore…I just know that at one point, he was. I'm still rather in shock. I don't particularly like him, so I really can't explain why I suddenly love him. Sure, they always say opposites attract, but do they really mean even to that extreme..? I can hear the doorbell ring, I don't feel like answering it. Maybe Mom or Ike will go get it. Nope, there it is again. Goddamnit. Do I always have to do everything myself around here?
Well speak of the devil…it's Eric. "Your phone is out," he tells me by way of greeting, and then he proceeds to push past me and head up to my room. I have no idea what he's doing here. Although, from his comment I'm guessing he meant to call me first instead of just showing up unexpectedly. "Are you sure the phone's out?" I'm following him now. "Yeah, it never stopped ringing." I frown and pick up the phone. Ike's voice comes floating to me. "…and then Filmore asked her out! I don't know which…" I put down the phone. "My phone's not out, Eric, Ike's just talking on it." He manages to look slightly embarrassed, but not much. "Oh." He looks like he's about to say something else, so I think I'll just wait for him to say it. "Did you read the poem I gave you?" I frown…what poem? Then I remember he did give me a poem before I left. He sighs. "I'll take that as a 'no'." I smile apologetically – or at least I try to. He gives me an odd look so I don't think I look all that sorry.
The poem is nothing short of amazing. Not that it really has great imagery or anything, but I think it's just because of the subject matter. He still has a way with words that no one I know could compare to, ever. I finish reading it and smile at him. "That's pretty good, are you going to read it to the class?" He shrugged in response, still watching me carefully. I have to turn away, he's making me too nervous. "So is that all you came over here for?" "I suppose so." He's not making any move to leave at all, though. Part of me wants him to leave, and part of me wants him to stay. I think the part that wants him to stay is winning. After all, he looks pretty cute sitting there…oh god, no, I did not just think that! I thought I only liked him because of his writing…I can't believe I'm only maybe an hour or two into this realization and it's already getting worse than I want it to! "What's wrong?" his voice is harsh, but his eyes show concern. "Oh…nothing." I lower my eyes to the ground. Well, it's not exactly a lie! Nothing's wrong…just nothing's right, either. I'm in love with my worst enemy, that can't be right. "I guess I should go now," Eric says, and I nod. He walks out the door without so much as a goodbye.
Cartman's POV
I can't believe I walked over to his house for nothing. Well, almost nothing. The cold wind is biting into me and making me shiver, but surprisingly enough I'm not that cold right now. I was watching him while he was reading the poem, and I can tell he liked it a lot more than he told me. In fact, I would even say he loved it. That in itself made the whole trip worth it. Glancing down at my scars, I smile. I won't be needing to make another one tonight. I can finally feel halfway normal. Normal people do not sit in the darkness and bring themselves the pain of life. Normal people kneel down, say their prayers, and get into bed.
I laugh at that. If that's the case, I will never be normal. One might think that the way I used to criticize Kyle would mean I really loved my religion. And I suppose back then, I did. But what do I see in it now? God never seems to help people out, if he even exists. He never heard my tortured cries at night, he never saw fit to give me a good life. I'm guess I'm pretty much one of those Pagans people here are always complaining about. I'm probably not even following the religion right. But I'm following it as best I can, in a whole town of Catholics…and one Jewish family. I don't think many people would accept it, but who cares? I've never cared what anyone thought before, so why start now?
I've been so lost in thought I didn't even realize I walked past my house. Oops. I head back to the door, and Butters opens it for me. "H-hi, Eric!" "…Butters, what are you doing in my house?" "Well, I came to spend the night but your mom said you left! So I was waiting for you to come back." I smile. Butters can be so predictable, sometimes. I remember when I used to invite him over so I could make fun of him. When he started being really nice to me and helping me through my depression, I started to feel something I had never felt before – guilt. So I showed him the photo album and apologized, and even though he was mad he eventually forgave me. Then we burned the album together. Sometimes I wonder if I'm going to regret doing that later – what if I need blackmail? But I don't think I'll be needing it anymore. "Hey, uh, E-Eric?" I never responded to what he said, I guess. But when I look around, I'm in my room already…guess I didn't notice I was walking up there. "Yeah?" "My parents wouldn't let me bring my sleeping bag, can we both sleep in your bed?" I sigh. I'm too afraid I might roll onto him and crush him while I'm sleeping. "How about we both camp out on the floor? I'll drag my pillows and blankets off the bed for us, and take some extras from the closet." He shoots me an understanding look, and nods sympathetically. "I'll help, then."
Kyle's POV
Sometimes when you think things are bad, they really aren't. Because something worse can always happen. And I suppose the same rule applies here. Because I know that something worse could happen. But it certainly doesn't feel like it. If only I had avoided reading the poem, I'm positive that I wouldn't be in this fix. I would be sitting here, planning out how to suffer through this project. Not laying down in the dark, wondering why I've fallen in love with someone I hate.
It's amazing how quiet it seems at night. You can be left alone with your thoughts for seconds…minutes…hours. Time never passes the way you expect it to in the dark. I wish I could go over to the computer, but I would be too tempted to look up ways to flirt with guys, or take a dumb quiz about if you and your crush are meant to be. Stupid pastimes, that only girls would be interested in. Still, the thought is tempting, and there's still enough hours left before daylight that I could spend some time surfing the net. Maybe I could look up reasons why you fall in love with people. Or I could look up what kind of annoying magic is in that poetry, and figure out if it's temporary or permanent.
Suddenly I sit up in shock. Magic! Was there magic in that poem? Is that why I've fallen for him? But then I start to laugh. Eric Cartman, into witchcraft? Get real. Besides, I don't even believe in magic…do I? And those are my last thoughts before I drop off to sleep, not knowing that in the morning my sleeping mind will have made things a whole lot clearer.
Author's Note: Could you guys do me a favor? Tell me how different my writing style is in these last three paragraphs (the last "Kyle's POV" in this chapter). I wrote everything else 6 months ago, and I just wrote that now. I want to know what I need to change before writing again. Thanks so much!