JUST a little joke before we begin...
A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food."
The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!"
The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white colouring. Eats shoots and leaves."
A/N IT STARTS OFF SLOW. I DONT OWN HARRY POTTER THOUGH I WISH I OWNED ONE DANIEL RADLCLIFFE AND ONE TOM FELTON :D THEN AGAIN, DONT WE ALL?. ENJOY!
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Holidays at the burrow:
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"OH MY GOD HARRY, RON LOOK!" Hermione screamed with delight as the letter that she was holding in front of her was written in gold ink.
"WHAT, WHAT?" Ron and Harry both came running into the room petrified that she was in trouble only to find she was grinning at them as she pinned her head girl badge to her jacket.
"Bloody hell Hermione, we thought you had seen a deatheater," Ron said as he placed his hand on his heart and slunk into a chair.
"Congratulations 'Mione," Harry said sitting next to her, "We always knew you would get it,"
"Yeah, mine came this morning…" Ron said glumly "Mums so proud." he added looking down.
"Oh you'll be fine Ronald, I'll be there as well," she grinned.
"Mmm…"
"What about you Harry?"
"Quidditch captain." Harry said smartly as Ron beamed at him.
"Best one yet!" Hermione agreed.
"OH good, you're all up!" Mrs. Weasley came into the kitchen smiling widely at the three. "Congratulations Hermione dear, i'm sure you and Ron will be fabulous heads," she said smiling proudly at her son, whom she noticed wasn't wearing his badge.
"Ronald, why arn't you weraring it?"
"I don't need to mum, i'm not there yet," he said as kindly as he could without the spitefulness showing.
Mrs Weasley smiled again and nodded "You should be proud Ronald, that's all my boys have been heads now!, How about I make you all a big breakfast, then you can go and pack your trunks up."
"That would be lovely Mrs. Weasley," Hermione replied.
"Yeah, thanks." Harry added and Ron just nodded glumly.
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"I hope Malfoy doesn't come back this year," Hermione said as she shut the lid of her trunk and sat on it. "Bloody Slytherin brat," she hissed "I'd be happy to put him in his grave, and his father for that matter."
"Me too," Harry agreed. "Things will be okay, I think. I mean, you and Ron will be on rounds and Malfoy will be too busy recruiting the other Slytherins for Voldemort. Something tells me this year is going to be a calm one…at least until the war begins."
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The train ride was a quiet one, the sweet trolley had come around as it had every year and the boys who were like big brothers to her made light convocation trying desperatly to avoid talking about the ministry and their lack of action against voldemort. Malfoy however, was nowhere to been seen and turned up at the feast half an hour late looking rather pleased with himself. Dumbledore announced the prefects, heads, and new teachers and then they were all sent to bed.
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Hogwarts:
Hermione sighed as she glanced down at her book in the library and remembered Harry's words.
"This year is going to be a calm one."
The Gryffindor then began to giggle, since when was a year at Hogwarts a calm one?
A cold voice came from behind her, which made her stop.
"What's so funny mudblood? Worked out how to use a hairbrush?, simple isnt it." Draco glared at her as she shut her book and got up.
"Spying on me now Malfoy, I had no idea you were that fond of me," she said smiling at him then turned from the blonde wizard and walked out with her head held high before he had time to think of a comeback.
Draco stood still with his arms crossed over his chest, that mudblood was going to pay for getting him kicked off the team.
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"OI WATCH IT!" Draco yelled at the person who had just run into him.
Hermione fell to the floor with a thud along with the books she was holding scattered across the floor in all different directions. She looked up at the person whom she had knocked over to find Malfoy was glaring at her. Hermione collected her books and stood up. "Im sorry." she said coldly.
"Course you are!" Draco threw his hands in the air. "I have to burn these clothes now. Do you know how expensive they are? Italian silk!" he exclaimed
"Im sorry alright!" Hermione shouted back as his blue eyes met with hers brown.
"Stupid girl!" he hissed
Hermione pushed past him, anger flaring inside her, fighting to come out.
Draco scowled after her.
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"I hate him, I hate him so much!" Hermione ranted as she flopped onto the sofa in the Gryffindor coming room where lavender and Ginny were watching Harry play chess with Ron.
"What's he done now?" Harry asked as he moved his queen.
"He's still breathing!" she hissed.
"That can be rearranged," Ron, said looking at her, "You only have to say…"
Hermione sighed as she massaged her temples "No, don't worry, let's just forget about Ferret and go and enjoy our dinner, you coming?" Hermione said as she got up.
"Yeah." the boys chimed as they vacated the chess set and walked down with her into the Great hall.
"Im starving!" Ron said as he sat down and began to pile a bit of everything onto his plate.
"Mmm." Hermione agreed as she sat between the boys and before she had a mouthful of potato in her mouth professor Dumbledore was standing up clapping his hands for silence.
"What now?" Ron mumbled.
"I hope you are enjoying your year so far," Dumbledore began
"Not likely with Snape still teaching here," Ron mumbled and Harry nodded.
"As you are no doubtfully aware, the Halloween ball is drawing near…prefects will be taking dancing lessons,"
"Fantastic…" Hermione whispered sarcastically.
"However this year I have decided that there is too much house rivalry and therefore you shall not be allowed to attend the ball with another from your own house." Dumbledore finished as the Great hall erupted with angry protests and glares.
"Then were not going," Ron nudged Harry.
"Silence!" Dumbledore bellowed and the hall silenced once more, "I understand that you will not like my decision, but if however you do agree... I shall reward you…"
"Reward us?" Harry raised and eyebrow at Hermione who shrugged.
"…with 50 house points each." he said proudly.
The hall was filled with whispering from all four tables as the students discussed Dumbledore proposition with each other.
"I could ask Cho..." Harry mumbled so quietly Ron missed it.
"Didn't think Dumbledore was the type to blackmail," Ron said as he stuffed another mouthful of food into his mouth and Hermione began to push hers around the plate.
"He is right though, I mean I never talk to the Hufflepuffs and as for the Slytherins…"
"That's because the Hufflepuff's are as thick as wooden planks," Ron said loud enough for a few of them to turn around and glare at him.
"Ron!" Hermione gasped horrified, "You can't say that, what I was saying was I've never spent time with them, not that I didn't like them,"
"Who in their right mind would want to go with a Slytherin?" Harry chipped in. "Every single one of them is lined up to become a deatheater, I might as well do myself a favor and kill them all now, saves the wait…"
Hermione felt sorry for Harry, his nightmares, according to Ron were not a pretty sight. He had heard the prophecy and he still lived in fear of Voldemort. "I don't think I'll be going then," Hermione said finally and the boys looked at her with fright.
"But you have to go! Not only because…B-because you're a prefect but because we can't go if your not there…" Ron stammered.
Hermione had temporarily forgotten she would have to take dancing lessons. Dancing was definitely not one of her strong points. Worse yet Malfoy would be there watching her the whole time…
"If I could have your attention again?" Dumbledore said again now standing up. "The heads of house's and I have decided among ourselves the prefect dancing partners, this person will also be your partner for the night." he said and peered down at the parchment in his hand.
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Cho Chang from Ravenclaw and Zacharias Smith from Hufflepuff
Terry Boot from Ravenclaw and Tracy Davis from Slytherin.
Susan Bones from Hufflepuff and Ronald Weasley from Gryffindor.
And, last but not least Hermione Granger from Gryffindor and Draco Malfoy from Slytherin.
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"Thank you and enjoy your meal!" he said and sat back down.
Hermione's mouth fell open as the thought of being paired up with Malfoy gave her the urge to vomit.
"Hermione are you okay?" Harry asked as he shook her arm lightly.
Hermione realized her mouth was open and she quickly shut it before smiling weakly at Harry. "Im fine…" she mumbled
The boys were lost for words; it didn't get any worse than Malfoy…
"Im not doing it, theres no way im dancing with that insufferable, intolerable, stuck- up, git!" she said firmly "I won't, can't, decline, reject, refuse, to dance or be within eighteen inches of the bastard."
"Oh that wasn't a very nice thing to say was it Granger?" a cold voice said from behind her and Hermione stiffened as she turned to see Draco Malfoy smirking at her with Crabbe and Goyle behind him.
"Want me to carry on?" she threatened, "I could always repeat what I did to you last month, I'd be happy to knock those teeth out,"
Draco raised an eye brow "Well im sure we will have plenty of time to insult each other and sort out your anger issues during practice," he smirked " And don't forget we have rounds tonight, eight-thirty, the library," he said "Don't be late, I don't need another reason to hate you." And he turned and left as if he had rehearsed the whole thing.
"I am NOT dancing with you Malfoy!" she yelled after him.
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Hermione sat by the fire with her legs crossed, her head tilted to one side and rested on her left hand as she read her book in peace until Ron came and sat next to her and all previous concentration was lost.
"Hermione…"
"..."
"Don't do that Ronald! It's so irritating, if you want to say something then just say it!" she almost yelled.
Ron turned a faint shade of red and cleared his throat. "You will be careful when you're with Malfoy tonight," he said
"Im always careful, they don't call me the smartest witch of my age for nothing." she answered.
"I know, but this is Malfoy were talking about…I'd be happy to swap rounds with you…you could have mine which are tomorrow night, at least then you will be with Terry Boot,"
Hermione looked up and smiled at him "Thank you for the offer but I don't think its a good idea, at least I can ignore the snide comments, you and him would be at each others throats straight away,"
Ron nodded and shrugged "Well let me just remind you that I wasn't the one who punched him,"
Hermione giggled and put down her book. "True…"
"Harry what's your best memory?" Hermione asked changing the subject.
Harry looked started as he looked up from the charms homework he was doing to find Hermione and Ron were sat together near the fire. A few minutes could not hurt and his eyes were killing him. "Not sure…probably the day I got my Hogwarts letter, the day I met Ron and the time you took all the blame for us being in the girls loo's when the troll decided it wanted to smash them up." He said still thinking "I've had so many good and utterly crazy times with you two, I just don't have a favourite." he said smiling as the fire was nice and warm against his back.
Hermione smiled as she lent against the bottom of the sofa and laughed, "We have had some rather life-threatening and loopy times haven't we. What about you Ron?"
The red head wrinkled his nose as he thought hard while he fiddled with his school trousers, which were fraying around the pocket. "The time Moody turned Malfoy into a Ferret," Ron decided nodding "The amazing bouncing Ferret," he recorded dubbing him.
The three burst out into fits of laughter. "Yes that was hilarious," Harry agreed. "What about you then Hermione?" Harry asked, "What's yours?"
"Umm…definitely receiving my Hogwarts letter, I thought I was dreaming when the letter said I was a witch. Meeting you two…," she flashed a grin at Ron who smiled back. "If I remember correctly the two of you were surrounded in every candy there was on that trolley and you Ron had a mouth full of chocolate frog as you tried to introduce yourself," she broke down into giggles again "Oh and the time me and Harry saved Sirius," she said and winked at Harry.
Harry understood what she meant and smiled back.
"Am I missing something…?" Ron said as the two started to laugh.
"No…" Hermione said innocently "Oh and the time Victor asked me to the Yule ball." she sighed "I do miss him…"
Ron grimaced at the thought, if only he had mustered up the courage to ask her himself before the Bulgarian prat had…
"Oh Merlin, look at the time!" Hermione said jumping to her feet and smoothing down her skirt and rolling the sleeves of her blouse a little further up her arm. "I have to spend an hour with him and I don't want it to start off badly," she said
"With a bit of luck he won't show up." Harry said.
"Are you sure you don't want me to come?" Ron asked seriously.
"I'm sure, I'll be fine, if he starts I'll turn him back into a white fluff ball," she said smiling at the thought "I'll see you both in the morning," she said, slipped out of the portrait hole and began to make her way hastily down to the library.
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A/N reviews are appreciated! look forward to insults and more fighting in the next chapter... :)