Listen to Your Heart – Chapter Four
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"Daddy? Oh my God, you- you're a daddy? Chandler?" Monica stared at him in disbelief. His eyes revealed the truth. After their initial eye contact, he refused to look directly at her, instead focusing his eyes on a point on the floor near his feet.
"You are, aren't you?" Monica exclaimed, "You – you have a daughter. Oh my God!" Her eyes flew to Michelle who was bouncing on the orange sofa and paying little attention to the discussion between her and Chandler, "This is your daughter?" Chandler's head snapped up to eye level and his eyes darkened protectively.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing, nothing," Monica stuttered apologetically, "I - It's just… you have a daughter. I can't believe you have a daughter. I can't believe you didn't tell me you had a daughter!"
"Well, what did you expect me to say? Oh, um yeah, I really like you, Monica, but by the way… I – I have a daughter named Michelle. Wanna meet her? Are you seriously trying to tell me that you wouldn't have run from me as fast as your feet could carry you? You wouldn't have even bothered to give me a second glance!"
"Well – I – no… well, I mean, maybe," Monica faltered, "I don't know," she eventually finished softly.
Chandler huffed, "Well, there you go."
"You don't have any reason to act like this is my fault! You were the one who ended it, if I remember correctly!" Monica, snipped, glaring at him.
"Ended it! We didn't have anything to end in the first place!"
"Well, there you go," Monica retorted.
"Look, I don't want us to fight about what we may or may not have had. It's just… I liked you and I was - I was scared. Scared of what you'd think. Of what you'd say about Michelle," He bit his lip, "It was a stupid thing to do… a really, really stupid thing to do, okay?"
"Chandler… I wouldn't ha-" Monica began, but was interrupted by Chandler.
"Monica, um, I really do want to talk about this, but Michelle… I don't feel comfortable talking about this in front of my daughter and she's already late for preschool. I –um- need to drop her off. We're already over fifteen minutes late," he mumbled glancing at his watch and cursing, "Maybe we can talk later… after I drop Mishi off?" he asked her hopefully, trying not to sound as desperate for her to agree as he felt. He was already moving to pick up Michelle, who was still bouncing cheerfully on the couch and eating the muffin her father had given her while talking to the people sitting on the chairs beside the couch, seemingly forgetting her 'no talking to strangers' rule under the observation of her father.
"I think I'd like that," Monica told him, smiling slightly at him as he moved blindly backwards in the general direction of the door, so he could look at her as she spoke. Michelle, still in his arms, waved at Monica with a blueberry covered hand.
"I'll be back in twenty minutes, okay? We can talk then," Chandler informed Monica. He turned to face the door, grinning, and walked right into the post situated by the table nearest to the door. Monica ran to his side, barely able to keep herself from laughing at his clumsiness. Fortunately, Michelle was fine, as Chandler as been holding her on the opposite side to that which he knocked into the pole; only Chandler seemed to be harmed.
"Are you okay?" Monica asked him, taking Michelle from his grip, so he could check his forehead for injuries. Michelle immediately began to twirl Monica's hair, "You have pretty hair."
"Thank you," Monica smiled at the little girl, feeling slightly guilty. How could she have ever hated her, even for a split second? "You've got pretty hair, too! Hey! Maybe, sometime I could show you how to do french braids."
"Really? Daddy doesn't knowed how!"
"Yeah? Well, then, maybe I could teach him, too," Monica smiled slightly.
"Hey, now, you guys don't need to worry about me," Chandler interrupted their conversation, sarcastically, "I'm fine. Hairstyling is much more important than your own father, right?" Chandler asked Michelle, teasingly. She giggled and buried her head against Monica's shoulder nodding. Chandler tickled her causing her to laugh harder.
"Are you really okay?" Monica asked sincerely. Chandler gingerly put his hand to his forehead, again, checking for blood. Relieved, he found none.
"Yeah I'm fine, I think my pride's just a little bruised, though," he smiled at her, "Okay, since we won't be needing to make a stop over at the emergency room, I guess we'll be on our way. I'll be back in twenty minutes," Chandler told Monica, spontaneously kissing her cheek and taking Michelle from her arms. Michelle enthusiastically waved goodbye to Monica as they left.
Monica watched them depart with a half-smile on her face. She turned around and sunk down into the couch, giving herself a minute to contemplate the whirlwind of information that had been thrown at her in the space of less than ten minutes.
Chandler had a daughter.
She was the cutest little girl Monica had ever seen, but… there were just so many 'but's. Why did everything revolving around her romantic life have to be so complicated? The knowledge that Chandler had a daughter was both good and bad news simultaneously. The fact that Chandler's big issue... his reason for thinking he shouldn't to be with Monica was that he had a daughter, well, that had nothing to do with his feelings for her. He could very well feel the way she did about him. She was beginning to understand that she still did feel the same way about him, despite Michelle. He was so cute with her. Anyone could tell he was a wonderful father to her. Monica had spent barely ten minutes with the pair and could already tell how much they loved each other.
Still… something didn't seem right.
Chandler was a single parent. He has other things to think about other than a relationship she reminded herself. That idea got Monica wondering about Michelle's mother. Michelle was clearly Chandler's biological child. They just looked too much alike for them not to be related. So where was Michelle's mother? And why wasn't she raising Michelle with Chandler?
A heart-stopping thought dawned on Monica. What if Chandler wasn't a single parent? What if all the things she'd assumed to be true, were just... assumptions. She suddenly felt a deep jealousy burning within her. Was Michelle's mother still her mother and Chandler's girlfriend… or worse... his wife? She scanned her brain, trying to remember something Chandler might have mentioned that'd give her a clue. Suddenly a thought clicked.
Phoebe.
He'd mentioned Phoebe many times, throughout the course of their dinner a week ago. How could she have been so blind? Had she been too busy developing feelings for him to realize he was married? Any feelings he had expressed for her, were obviously nothing more than him trying to let her down gently. The more she thought about it the more it made sense. Phoebe was always around! Everything Chandler did seemed to include Phoebe, all his anecdotes seemed to involve her. Phoebe had been watching Michelle the night Chandler and Joey had had dinner with her, Rachel and Ross. Who better to watch Michelle than her mother, while her father caught up with old friends?
Monica was startled out of her jealous trance when Rachel bounded into the coffeehouse and plopped down next to her on the couch, all smiles.
"What's up, Mon? You look…" she paused, "intense."
"Yeah," Monica told her absently, "I was just thinking."
"About?"
"Hmm? Oh, nothing…" Monica said distractedly, "Chandler just stopped by a little while ago, guess I was thinking about that."
"That? Or him?" Rachel joked, trying to appear light-hearted, referring to the almost post-breakup daze that Monica seemed to have been caught up in for the previous week, ever since the night they'd all had dinner. Rachel knew Monica was crazy over him, and after learning from Joey details of Chandler's past, was more determined than ever to get them together.
Monica sighed. "Some of both, I guess."
"I'm sorry, honey," Rachel told her consolingly, rubbing her back.
Monica looked up at her questioningly. "What are you sorry for? You don't even know what happened, yet."
"I can just tell," she informed Monica, "I mean come on, look at you, obviously something not so good happened."
"Jeez thanks, Rach. I know I can always count on you to be complementary," Monica told her, sarcastically.
"Is this about Michelle? It is, isn't it?"
Monica gasped. "How do you know about Michelle?"
"Joey," Rachel told her, smiling at the thought of her boyfriend. Their kiss in the cab a week prior had led them to confront their feelings for one another and had successfully blossomed into a relationship.
"You knew about Michelle and you didn't tell me! I can't believe you!" Monica hit Rachel on the arm, in her frustration.
"Oww! C'mon Mon, he made me promise not to tell!" Rachel defended herself, rubbing her arm.
Monica glared at her. "That's never stopped you before!"
"Hey!" Rachel replied, sheepishly, "I told you I was sorry about that!"
"Yeah, well, it wasn't exactly the most fun I've ever had, explaining to Ross why my underwear were hanging out there on the telephone pole. You know he was this close to telling Mom and Dad? I had to bribe him with food for a month to get him to not tell them!" She said, resentfully, "I can't believe I had to bribe my 27-year-old brother not to rat me out to Mom and Dad!"
"He was my boyfriend back then. I told him everything! Haven't you ever heard it's not good to keep secrets from your significant other? Honesty is the root of a good relationship. Obviously Ross knows nothing about that!" Rachel explained, with disgust.
"Rach? Haven't we discussed this enough? Ross cheated on you. You were not on a break. What he did was evil and you're the innocent victim. I know. Everyone in the coffeehouse knows. And I'm beginning to think it's only a matter of time before everyone in Manhattan knows. Can we get back to the matter at hand, please?"
Rachel ignored Monica. "I know! He was hiding her behind his apartment door, when I was kissing him in his apartment! I mean he cheated on me, and then he just kissed me with her still in his apartment like nothing had happened! Can you believe it?" Rachel shook her head disbelievingly.
"Y'know, I really can't. And I couldn't believe it the other eight hundred and ninety-two times you told me, either."
"Hey! It was not that many!"
"Pretty close!" Monica informed her. Rachel huffed. "Getting back to our current situation… how come you didn't tell me what you knew?"
"I wanted to… but everyone thinks I'm such a bad secret keeper! I'm not!" Rachel defended herself, "I only told Ross because he was my boyfriend."
"I'm your best friend," Monica shot back, "you have to tell me everything too!"
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry, I really, really was going to tell you that night, but then before I could, you started on about Chandler! You were gushing about how sweet he was and every, little, tiny thing he did throughout the course of the night. It was a good half an hour before I could even get a word in edgewise. And then you just kept going on and on, I didn't have the heart to tell you, because you seemed so happy, thinking you could change his mind and make him see that you were 'meant' for each other. You even made that 'we're destined to be together, he's the one' speech I haven't heard since you were dating Richard! I didn't want to be the cause of you being upset!"
Monica smiled, a warmth returning to her voice, "You didn't want me to be upset?"
"Nope, of course not, Mon! I hate seeing you hurt, you're like one of my sisters. I know you'd do the same thing for me."
"Hey… Rach," Monica asked, abruptly changing the topic, "Did, um, did Joey happen to mention, uh, Phoebe?"
"What Phoebe? You mean that girl he and Chandler hang out with? No, not really..."
"Ugh, nevermind, then," Monica said distractedly. She suddenly froze, spotting Chandler entering the coffee shop over Rachel's shoulder. "Shhhh, Rach! Remember to be cool! Be calm and casual. Be breezy!" Rachel chuckled at Monica's obsessive antics. Monica was attempting to paste a 'casual breezy' expression on her face and failing miserably. Rachel smiled to herself, wondering if Chandler knew what he was setting himself up for.
Chandler smiled uncomfortably at Rachel, "Hi, Rachel."
"Hey Chandler! What's up? It's just great seeing you again. Unfortunately, I have to go um, make my bed, so I'll see you guys later."
"Is she okay?" Chandler asked Monica quietly, as Rachel disappeared out the door, "She seemed… weird just now."
Monica ignored the question. "I know all about Phoebe!" she informed Chandler, triumphantly.
"Excuse me?"
"Don't play stupid with me, Chandler." Monica told him with a glare.
Genuinely confused, Chandler told her, "Um, what? You've lost me, here."
"I know that Phoebe is Michelle's mother!" Monica told Chandler, unable to keep the intense jealousy out of her voice.
"You know, do you?"
"I know that you're married and you love her so much more than you've ever loved anyone before and that you think she's your soulmate. I also know that Phoebe is pregnant again, and you want a boy this time. You made up that ridiculous surrogate story so we wouldn't find out about you two. I mean, c'mon, couldn't you have thought of something better than that?" Monica demanded.
Chandler stared at her softly, leaning forward and taking her hands in his, "Are you crazy?"
Monica looked taken aback. "What?"
"Sounds like you've woven yourself quite there little story there. I don't think I even want to know what gave you that crazy idea. Phoebe and I are not married. I love her, she's one of my best friends, but she's certainly not my soulmate. She is most definitely not Michelle's mother. And as hard as it is to believe, Phoebe is indeed carrying triplets for her 19-year-old half-brother and his 42-year-old wife."
As Chandler leaned closer to her, she noticed a thin gold chain hanging around his neck. Something about it was calling out to her, though she couldn't pinpoint why. Before he had a chance to realize what she was doing, she'd tugged gently on the necklace, pulling it from underneath his shirt. She stared at it silently for a few moments.
"Chandler what's this?" Monica asked, twirling the object gently in her fingers.
He gulped in a breath of air, swallowing nervously and told her quietly, "Um. Well, that would, uh that would be my wedding ring."
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Here's the last of the old chapters! Next up new material, yay! I have a couple of the new chapters written, so hopefully it won't be long before you see them. I'm hoping they blend seamlessly, but I'm still a little wary of posting them, since it has been so long :P I also had a couple of Mondler fluff/drama oneshots in the works, but since there doesn't seem to be much interest based on the one already posted, I think I'll forgo those and concentrate on this series.
This chapter is a bit short and fillerish, I know, but more good stuff, both for Mondler and Rachel/Joey is coming up :D The next chapter will be huge, to make up for it :P
As always, please review :) I've still got that cold and am just feeling lazy and generally crappy so I could use some inspiration to get me motivated :)