"G-Gai..." tears are streaming down his face, now, and he throws his arms around his former sensei. "I miss you...I miss you so much..." he's sobbing into his dream's shoulder, not caring it's not real, only caring that for this instant he can pretend that Gai is really there. "It hurts so bad...I don't know what to do anymore..."
"Shhh, it's all right," dream-Gai tells him, one hand coming up to pat the back of Lee's head.
"It's not, I can't stop thinking about you, I don't know how to go on anymore--" before the words are even out of Lee's mouth Gai has pulled away and punched him across the jaw. Lee's head snaps to the side and he stares at the wall in shock.
"Cheer up. Who's this sad little boy in front of me? Where's my Lee? My strong, unstoppable, beautiful green beast of Konoha?" Gai is looking around with one hand shading his eyes, and then he stops and pinches Lee's cheek with a wide grin. "Where's he gone?" And Lee can't help but smile now, even though he's still crying. Then he's laughing and crying and clutching Gai close again, and this time Gai doesn't push him away. He lets Lee cry himself out, and when he quiets again kisses his forehead. "Everything will be all right. Don't worry. It'll all be fine, I promise."
When Lee wakes in the morning there are tears dried on his face, but for the first time in months he feels like he can face the day.
-----
"Won't you stay for tea?" Gaara asks quietly as Lee turns to leave. Lee pauses in the doorway; something in the way Gaara said it implied more than simple formality. When Lee half-turns back toward him, the redhead fumbles for words. "I know...we were never...'friends'. It would've been impossible. But I never..." his forehead bunches together as he tries to find words. "...I never properly apologized." Lee turned to face him. "You haven't been sleeping. Have tea with me." Gaara's face is back to its usual expressionless mask, but there's something in his eyes that had never been in the eyes of the bakemono of his youth.
-----
Gaara is silent as he pours the tea; eyes nearly closed and hands holding the teapot with a gentleness no one would've expected him to have in his early years as Kazekage. He had been all business then, doing what had to be done quickly and efficiently with no thought for emotion or subtlety. Now, as Lee looked at him, it seemed impossible that this was the same person who had nearly killed him years ago. In a way he isn't, Lee supposed, as Gaara sets the teapot to the side with a soft exhalation of contentment. Lee lifts the bowl, turning it slightly before sipping the steaming liquid.
The room is dancing with shadows from the flowers arranged across the window; soft breezes carry their aroma through the room for a subtler, more beautiful scent than any incense could provide. This room is cooler than most in Suna but warmer than those of Konoha this time of year. Gaara's kimono is red and black silk, the two colors blending into one another so seamlessly it's impossible to tell where one begins and the other ends. Lee's is pale green, small vines tracing their way in thread up from the hem. For some reason these little details seem more important than anything else in the world.
Lee sighs as he holds the bowl out to Gaara, bowing slightly as Gaara's smooth hands touch his rough ones and gently take the bowl from him. Lee watches as Gaara raises the bowl slightly to him, then drinks. His eyes are all but closed and every muscle of his face is relaxed, as if every care is gone from his mind. They sit in silence for several minutes after Gaara has set the bowl down once more.
"May I?" Lee asks, gesturing to the tea set. Gaara nods and Lee lifts the teapot to examine it, a crimson silk cloth between his fingers and the ceramic. It isn't skillfully crafted, but its small flaws only add to its beauty. The glaze is uneven in places, and doesn't quite cover to the bottom edge; the cover scrapes very slightly when placed; the spout is slightly crooked.
"My wife and daughter made it for me," Gaara says softly.
"It's beautiful," Lee breathes.
Gaara has an odd look on his face as he takes the cloth and pot from Lee's hands. It's as if he wants to say something but doesn't know what it is, nevermind how to say it. "It's my most treasured possession," he whispers. It occurs to Lee suddenly that Gaara finally feels love, even if he doesn't recognize it as such. "I'll have to introduce you to them, sometime," Gaara says as he begins to clean the utensils.
"I'd love to meet them," Lee smiles. Silence falls again, only broken by the small noises of Gaara storing the tea set.
"You haven't been sleeping well," Gaara says suddenly. Lee snaps out of his reverie at the observation and colors slightly. Some of Gaara's old bluntness is still there, he notes to himself.
He fumbles with several answers in his mind and finally settles with "No. I haven't." Even though he consciously knows there's no real danger, some subconscious warning makes him want to avoid the subject of sleep with an insomniac. Still, he can't help but ask, "Have you managed to sleep at all?"
"Yes." Lee tries to mask his surprise but doesn't quite manage. He could almost swear he saw a hint of a smile on Gaara's face; as if the redhead said it just for the reaction.
Lee tries to think of a more polite way to ask, but his curiosity overcomes his respect. "How?"
"I drink," Gaara says simply as he sits once more, now with a bottle of sake in hand. "It puts me to sleep, and Shukaku as well. When he's asleep, he's no danger to anyone." A far-away look comes into his eyes - still dark-rimmed - as he raises the bottle to his lips and he whispers, "I even dream sometimes." He's silent for several moments as he drinks, and when he lowers the bottle he stands and walks to the window. Lee follows him as he folds his arms on the sill, nudging flowers out of the way. When Lee looks closer he sees that the flowers are growing out of a small dip filled with soil that's built into the windowsill. "When Shukaku starts to come alive before I do, Ame wakes me." He takes another deep swig from the bottle, then offers it to Lee without turning from the view out the window. It's such an odd contrast to the formality and subtlety of the tea ceremony they'd finished not long ago that Lee actually takes the bottle from his hand, holding it to his nose and then passing it back with a snort of distaste.
"I'm sorry, I can't drink," he says at Gaara's odd look.
"Ahh, I remember now...Suiken. 'Drunken Fist'. I would've liked to fight you when you're drunk. At least...back then." Lee watches him take a long drink and can almost see him staring Shukaku down.
-----
Gai's fist shoots forward and Lee slips fluidly to the side, barely avoiding its impact before he's shifting his balance and swinging his foot up. Gai twists to catch Lee's leg between his arms and Lee knew he would, so he uses the cross of Gai's arms as a brace to slide himself under his mentor's arms and behind him, twisting and dealing a heavy double-kick to Gai's back. Gai shifts forward and lets his knees give out at the last moment so instead of Lee's feet hitting the back of his vest they hit nothing but air. Lee starts to collapse to the ground but catches himself on his hands, flipping away from Gai to avoid the elbow that comes around as Gai spins toward him. They trade blows for several more minutes until Lee is just barely too slow in avoiding a punch and is caught across the face; he manages to turn his head to avoid most of the impact but it's close enough to scare the little blond girl watching them into a squeal.
"LEESAN!!!" she screams and jumps up as Lee twists to the ground, thrown off balance by Gai's punch and her scream. She's standing over him and he's too shocked to do anything but stare at her in bemused confusion as she yells at the man who's at least three times as tall as her. Then her fist flies forward and Gai falls down, curled around himself, and Lee can't stop laughing.
"Awaji!!" Naruto calls as he comes over the crest of the hill, and then he sees Lee laughing so hard he's crying and Gai curled up and stops in his tracks, blinking. "What'd you do?"
"Gaisensei hit Leesan!" she squeals and runs toward Naruto, burying her face in his pant leg as Sakura crests the hill behind him. She's chatting with Ino, and Sasuke is on her other side with a hand around her waist. Ino's hand is resting on the beginnings of a bulge in her own belly.
"That girl's got a future in taijutsu," Gai puts on a grin past the tears in the corners of his eyes, still not quite able to stand.
Then everything freezes. Sakura is caught mid-wave to Lee, Ino beaming at something she said a moment ago; Sasuke has a very small smile quirking the corners of his mouth. Naruto is frozen with Awaji lifted half into the air and both of them have the exact same smile on their faces.
Lee rolls over to look at Gai, who uncurls himself easily. "They're going to need you, you know," he mock-punches Lee's cheek. "Somebody's got to teach these kids some decent taijutsu." Lee rolls onto his belly and rests his chin on his folded arms. He doesn't speak for a few moments.
"Can I do it without you? I mean, what if I mess up? What if I hurt one of them?" The thought of leaving a mark, no matter how light or accidental, on Awaji or any of the other students horrifies him.
"We all worry about hurting those we love. You wouldn't believe how terrified I was of hurting you when I first met you." Gai ruffles Lee's hair and sits up, a small smile coming onto his face. "I almost didn't take the offer to teach you for just that reason. I was afraid I would push you too hard and you would break or hate me forever."
Lee pushes himself up off the ground instantly. "I could never hate you!"
"Exactly!" Gai grinned and pointed at him. "That's exactly what I had to learn, and what you've got to realize. Just start out slow, with the basics." He gestured over his shoulder. "They're your family. They won't leave you so easily."
Lee's eyes welled up with tears, and he pushed himself forward to fall against Gai and wrap him in a tight hug. He was crying again but didn't care, because Gai was sighing and rolling his eyes and had the scar over his eye that Kakashi teased him for, and he was holding Lee tight and patting the back of his head and kissing his temple like he always used to. Lee was alternating between sobbing into Gai's shoulder and kissing him, even though he knew it was only a dream. "I love you so much...I miss you so bad but I love you and I'm never ever gonna stop..."
"I love you too, Lee," Gai whispered into his ear. "I love you too."
-----
Lee is moving through a taijutsu form, a small smile on his face as he watches Awaji out of the corner of his eyes. She's staring at him with awe as he flips across the grass and spins through the air, and he can't help but show off a little because every time he does something particularly 'dangerous' she gives a little gasp and her hands come up to cover her eyes.
"Awaji!" Naruto calls as he appears over the crest of the hill, waving to his daughter. She jumps up and Lee swings by her, lifting her in a fluid movement and she squeals in mock-terror as he flips back upright with her on his shoulders.
"Daddy!!" she cries happily, waving back as Lee trots toward him. Sasuke and Sakura are close behind Naruto, holding one hand each of a little boy with black hair that stands out at every angle conceivable. Sakura's belly is big again, and Lee can tell that Sasuke is trying his hardest to keep anyone from noticing how carefully he watches her.
"How're you doin, sweetie?" Naruto says as he ruffes his daughter's hair. Ino is coming over the hill, now, Neji with one arm around her waist and a little boy with long black hair trotting before them. Neji whispers something to Ino, a small smile on his face, and she giggles. Suddenly the little boy stumbles, but before he can even begin to fall Neji's hand has whipped forward to steady him.
"He's never going to learn balance if you never let him fall, Neji," Lee laughs, and Neji colors slightly at having been caught.
"I just...don't want him to get hurt," Neji mumbles, and Lee nods.
Sasuke starts to step toward Lee, but the little boy refuses to let go of him. Instead, he lets go of Sakura, sticking the thumb of the hand she was holding in his mouth. She laughs and turns to Ino, leaving Sasuke staring at the little boy as if he's no idea what to do. The little boy stares right back at him, blinking owlishly as he sucks his thumb. A moment of awkwardness ensues that everyone pointedly ignores in which Sasuke tries to pick up the little boy but can't seem to manage it because he's being so careful; finally he settles on walking toward Lee at a pace his son can follow.
Lee lifts Awaji off his shoulders and she clings to Naruto like a limpet before reaching toward Sakura. "Mommy!" she squeals, and Naruto walks over to her with a laugh. Sasuke leads Lee a few feet away from the others to under the shade of the tree on the top of the hill, the little boy still holding tight to his hand.
"You're growing so quick, Saizou, you're gonna be bigger than us soon!" Lee laughs down at the little boy, who just stares up at him. Lee turns to Sasuke with an almost-nervous smile. "Still not talking, huh?"
"No, not yet. He's probably just so used to not getting a word in around Awaji, he doesn't realize he can talk yet," another of Sasuke's rare smiles, the ones that are just barely there for an instant and then gone again.
"I'm sure he'll start talking when he has something to say, and then you won't be able to keep him quiet," Lee smiles. Saizou has knelt down - still holding Sasuke's hand - and is staring at a tuft of long grass.
Sasuke watches him for a moment, and then speaks without turning back to Lee. "...I was wondering if you'd teach them taijutsu. I know he's not ready yet, but Awaji won't stop bothering us about it - you're all she ever talks about anymore," that small smile comes onto his face again as he glances back at Sakura and the others.
In that instant they both feel a small shock and there's a tiny sound from their feet that's no louder than the rustling of leaves above them; they look down and the very tip of the blade of grass Saizou is staring at is glowing red and giving off the tiniest of smoke trails. Saizou's free hand is twisted up in a parody of a seal that Sasuke can only ever remember one other person using.
"I..." Sasuke's eyes are wide and his voice is barely above a whisper. "I won't have anyone but the best teach them."
-----
I did a picture myself for this, which is kinda meh right now but I'm gonna polish up later when I have time to
chima deviantart com/art/After-Happiness-colored-61593312
I can't wait to see more of the manga VC is writing T-T
put periods instead of spaces between chima/deviantart and deviantart/com