Disclaimer: All places, characters, plots and names you recognize aren't mine but property of J.. The OC's, the plot and other invented things are mine.

Note: I first used the term 'spick' in the letter from Hope's father to Hope. Since some people have mentioned having a problem with the word I've changed it into 'latino'. I'm sorry if it hurt anyone, it wasn't my intention, I had looked it up in a dictionary and there it stated that the term written with ck wasn't offensive.

Special Thanks to those who reviewed this chapter: Padme4000, Whit Black, Emberlyn Knight, Aljinon, Hades'Queen, acidoceans .

Week Three

Monday the 13th of September 1993.

It was with an insane headache that I woke up this morning, don't ask me why, I'm already mad enough that when I mentioned it to Melaina she claimed it was because I clearly had missed Niffle and Noffle, the two Nifflers we'd brought Hagrid back only yesterday. Yea she gave them names…she gave the beasts names and keep calling them her sweeties.

"I miss these sweeties, and don't even try to deny you miss them too, your subconscious misses them, it's trying to tell you by giving you a headache, only your rational brain doesn't want to accept the facts."

"What facts? That I miss being half bitten and scratched to death by two monsters trying to steal my ring."

"They don't want to steal it, they just want to sniffle it, that's why they're called Nifflers."

"No! NO! You, you're always on their side! Has it never occurred to you that this ring has a sentimental value to me! You allied yourself to such, such, evilnesses it's a calamity, the devil itself is represented by Nifflers, you worship the devil!!" Ok, I'm clearly not in my right state, what's happening to me, I don't know, but it's getting weird, really. Soon I realize though, as I have a look at my wristwatch, it's only eight, I need sleep. So I smile to myself, tears in my eyes, and fall back to sleep. I'm really such a baby when I get less than my daily five hours of beauty sleep.

I finally get up at ten, a more reasonable time to get out of bed, really all hours with only one digit are so ungodly to wake up to! It's clearly with a better mood that I skip to the Common Room. I've always found this common room freaky…it's so…green…and…silver …that may be because green and silver are our house colours, but does everything have to be green and silver because of this stupid reason, even the sheets are green and silver. I wouldn't want to be in Gryffindor, red and yellow, that must be dangerous for the brain really, it's not a surprise all these Gryffindors are so 'brave' they just want to die out of frustration rather than step foot into their tower. It's only halfway my green and silver common room that I realize there's a regrouping around the display board. Me being myself, this meaning smaller than most of the fourth years, I have to use my authority to make a way passes the crowd to see what it is about.

Finally I reach close enough to read the little piece of information: Hogsmeade weekend on the 31st of October. That's when I notice another, smaller, piece of parchment: The Flying Lessons for the Seventh Years are planned on Monday after Lunch and will start the twentieth of September. Oh no, I'd completely forgotten about Flying lessons and 20th is only next week! Ah, see how a mood can be spoilt in about three seconds by a stupid discovery, I'd rather have remained in ignorance.

Let me explain, I hate Flying lessons, and yes even seventh years have them, not only firsties, the thing is that when I decided I'd ditch the lessons back in sixth year Hooch personally came to see me to ask me to take her class because I had 'a born talent for Seeker I still had to discover' and I could have given her the brush-off, she couldn't possibly have any more influence on my grades really, but that's when my problem kicks its way in: I love compliments. Now I hear you going: duh who doesn't? But that's when you don't get the gravity of the problem: I really really love compliments. That's probably why I still socialize with other girls than Melaina on my dorm at all, because, face it, I hate Rose in particular, sometimes I could just scratch her eyes out, but then she's like: oh you have such a beautiful writing, and me being me…I give in…which is bad of course, it's bad to depend on somebody else's compliments and thoughts, but I'm like that and there's nothing to it. A shrink, as muggles call them, could probably find some link to my childhood and the lack of compliments then, but the result remains that I melt with a compliment and get icy cold at the lack thereof.

So that's how I got myself landed into these dreadful flying lessons, telling myself on and on I should ditch the subjects, but each time I realize the class isn't that bad (well Hooch likes me for some reason) and 'forget' about never coming back. Anyway, the woman would probably run after me to remind me I have a flying lesson right, because I'd probably have 'forgotten it' really.

This news brings me so down I think I'll have another one hour or two of sleep, doesn't matter whether I have Herbology, I'm in no mood to struggle with life-threatening, stinking plants, then again I'm in no mood to deal with an angry Snape either.

While in Herbology (I managed dragging myself there, and on time either!) I can't help but realize that with flying lessons I won't have any agreeable one class Monday but a horrid one class and a hellish flying afternoon class added. This was my last flying-free Monday, had I been in a sensitive mood, a single tear would be sliding down my cheek right now, but being in my right mind I just heave a desperate sigh making all the seeds I am supposed to plant this lesson on my tabletop fly off its surface. Bugger. "Miss Finry, you want to be careful with these, they're very rare and expensive!" I get the impression she says that each time, might as well steal some one day or another…I could earn some money with them…but my evil thoughts have no time to bloom into good structured plans as the bell rings announcing the end of this very boring class.

I finally meet Melaina at the Slytherin table, no she's not eating, she's just reading plucking some food here and there, that's her way of eating stuff.

"What's wrong?" She asks as she sees me slouching down on the bench in front of her.

"Flying lesson in a week, need I say more?" She gives the look that tells me she's about to say something like 'Haven't I told you not to take the class, it's only for fanatics' but seeing how dreadful and desperate I'm being she stops herself from doing so and tries to cheer me up instead, which works rather well as usual. Soon we go downstairs to our common room and decide to play some exploding snaps and talk about stupid jokes we could do one day or another, practical pranks and dirty stuff like usual. These things never fail to make me all cheerful again and it's finally with a good mood that I fall into a peaceful slumber.

Tuesday the 14th of September 1993.

Guess what, Charms is boring. Yeah, Flitwick has decided to teach us, grab your stool, Conjuring Spells, the thing is that most of these spells have been seen years ago, seemingly little Flitwick has put it in his wicked mind to prepare us thoroughly for the NEWTs at the beginning of our seventh year, and not like all teachers midway or simply at the end of it. If only Milly was here to entertain me, but she's seemingly decided to skip the class, and it's not a matter of sleeping till noon, she was awake this very morning so she's clearly just playing truant! I have nothing against that, being one myself most of the times, but she should have told me and we could have gone and have fun together. I sigh for the hundredth time this morning. "Don't you understand Miss Finry, it's all about the nice wrist move, look: you turn smoothly and flick it at once down." I try to nod as if suddenly he had enlightened me on a spell I had managed since the second lesson we had seen it, other students around me seem to still struggle with it, sometimes I feel like I'm a genius in a world of stupids…then again that's just the teachers making us like that, they make a big deal of something simple as if it was the hardest thing on earth and then when things get really complicated they just skip through it as if it was basic stuff. Or they're doing their job wrong, or my mind is just reversed.

It's at lunch that I meet Melaina for the first time today apart from that little sight I got of her this very morning. "You left me to deal with your crush all alone!" I accuse her the second her bum brushed the surface of her bench. It has taken all of my patience to not just shout it the second she entered the Great Hall though.

"Ow, that, I wasn't in the mood, went to see Hagrid instead." I grumble in response. Soon we move on to another subject though and all is forgotten and cheery again, that is until an owl lands next to my plate outstretching its legs grumpily. It's an answer from my dad…about Snape, or better about how the two men met. I have no time to open it though as the bell rings and we have to hurry down to potions, for my part, leaving a completely pissed off owl, but that doesn't matter, the thing has never showed any hint of affection towards me, a bit of attention more or less won't change a thing to it I suppose.

We have to make a shrinking potions today…something I don't get the concept of. I mean, if you want to shrink something, a normal witch or wizard will take his or her wand and utter a shrinking spell. But Snape will first go get some ingredients, find a cauldron, make a fire, find all the utensils and starts brewing the potions to then shrink the thing…does that make sense? Not to me really. So I don't see why I should even try to manage the thing in question.

"Finry how comes I have a faintly disgusting smell rising up to my nose when I pass your cauldron containing dark green sticky potion." Oh the options I get here I could say: 'Because I farted, I'm so sorry sir' or even better put the blame on someone else, or just lets be crazy, I put the blame on him. Or I could say it's because something's wrong with his nose, 'Yes sir, it's getting all crooked and so ugly, oh wait it's always been like that.' But something stops me from talking, stops me from breathing normally, I suddenly see his beetle black eyes, and I think, no, I know, that I don't need to open my father's letter to know what's written in it. I've recognized Snape, I know how my dad and him met each other…for Severus Snape is none other than my stepfather. My eyes can't even bear the sight of his and I can't help but look down, keeping my voice silent. I'm awaiting another sneer comment but it never comes. When I dare to look up I realize he's gone, or at least, at the other side of the room looking paler than usually.

When the bell rings I hear his faint voice telling me to stay after class. Once everyone has left the classroom and I'm left with him slightly trembling he speaks up. "Miss Finry," How weird, he suddenly shows respect, "I suppose you have questioned your father about me, and I take he has answered you about my identity." I nod slightly. "Of course you will understand that this piece of information has to stay between you and me, I won't allow any leaks of any kinds, and if somebody knows about it I will know, Miss Finry, to whom I have to advert myself to claim guilt." I nod again murmuring a small 'yes sir' before he allows me to leave.

After this I can't go to Defence Against the Dark Arts, I just feel like I'm about to break down any minute, so instead I decide to skip the class for once and call sick, I'm close to being completely sick anyway, so that makes no difference at all. I direct my walk towards the dormitory to seek some privacy, but as I enter I soon see I won't have it here. Seemingly I'm not the only one not feeling in the mood for another class, Melaina's lying in her bed reading a book.

"What's wrong? You look like you've been puking." She asks the second I walk in, looking up from her book 'A history of Vampires'.

"Something close to that." I answer to her observation making my way to my bed.

"Has Snape done something to you? Talk to me Liz, please." She goes on, setting her book aside, suddenly aware and concerned.

"I-I-" The next thing I know my face is in my hands and tears are streaming from my eyes. "Snape…Snape is my…my stepfather." Silence follows apart from my sobs, until Melaina allows herself to laugh heartily for a second to then grow silent again, a horrified look on her face.

"That was a joke, right, you've always been so good at acting, Liz, Elizabeth, don't…you…you mean that??"

I and Melaina have never really told a lot about our respective families, just enough to understand each other's familial problems when they occur, but this goes above anything so I go into a 'short' explanation.

"-my dad having to travel a lot for his job, my mom was left alone most of the time, she resided in Portugal at that moment, shortly after my dad joined her from a travel she announced she was pregnant of my big brother. My dad decided to stop travelling and gaining less money for a work in London instead, at the Ministry, they moved there too and my mom got my brother. They were like the sort of perfect family, until my brother, Samuel, grew up and dad realized the boy was clearly not his. Samuel has like dark brown hair like nobody in the family and his skin is darker than my parents' and his eyes…" I gasp at the moment and dig my face back into my hand crying loudly. "-Melaina…he has…he has Snape's eyes!"

I'm about sure Melaina's about to gasp too, or look at me disbelievingly, mouth slightly opened, but nothing, no nothing, could have prepared me to her reaction. She suddenly starts laughing hard and loud, her usual laugh, she laughs so much she rolls off the bed and lands on the ground with a thud, laughing on. After about half a minute I get scared someone has hexed her, after one minute I'm about sure and has it not been for her sudden talking I think I would have used a counterspell on her.

"Haven't you…haven't you ever thought of playing comedy." She tells wiping her eyes.

"This ain't funny Mil! I just discovered Snape is part of my family and you laugh at it." I ask shocked.

"Oh my…Merlin, Liz." She utters between fits of laughter. "Hagrid has beetle black eyes too, and…I-I could sum about three persons with the same eyes. Does this mean they're all like part of the same family? Who knows maybe Hagrid's your stepdad, and clearly, your mum resided in Portugal at that time, doesn't that ring a bell, she must've gotten Samuel with some local inhabitant, a Portuguese hunk, anything's better than Snape."

"Oh really, then tell me just why he got so pale when he realized I knew about it, why he told me not to speak word about this to anybody! Look, I've broken my promise to a teacher for you and you laugh at me instead of being serious and trying to help me!"

At this she stumbles over onto the ground once more, luckily she hadn't climbed back on the bed after her previous fall, well luckily for her as I'm still giving her a deadly look. I decide I'd rather just sulk in my bed alone instead of having to see her laughing at my misery.

"Aw come on, Liz, didn't you figure out that Snape maybe has other secrets? Like for example…I don't know, he could be a vampire, and he thought you'd figured it out. The guy is just so weird he must have at least more than one big secret." I huff at her statement. "And what did your dad say about Snape anyway?" At this I throw the letter backwards and hear it has landed straight into her face. Then I hear a ruffling of parchment before she reads aloud.

Dear Liz,

Yes I've met Snape a couple of years ago while I was travelling around the globe for the Ministry, quite a scary person. I had few business with him, gave some plant he needed for some sort of potion I suppose and then I went off.

I can read you're clearly your daddy's daughter, not that I'm proud of my daughter landing herself in detention so: You bad girl try to do your best at school. Now I've done my 'educating' part I feel better.

I'm sorry I couldn't write earlier, I was on another travel, but now I'm home hopefully until February, I hope to see you at the end of the year, but knowing your mother you'll be embarked in all sorts of family festivities, I wish you good luck and strength with that already. (The sadness was almost palpable here.)

Try not to get yourself into more trouble though, I'd hate to have to hear Snape telling me how naughty a girl you are,

Greets,

Daddy.

She folds the letter. "Well you see, there's nothing bad to it, Snape is not the secret father of your half-brother."

"But how could you know, my dad clearly tried to avoid saying it! He said he met him once, but he didn't say who Snape was!" I argue on.

"Sincerely, if Snape had wanted to hurt you really he should've said something along the lines of: 'how very like your mother you are'"

"Or he was a secret admirer of my mom, and he wanted to underline the fact that when his genes weren't implied the kid wasn't good or something." I get the impression this talk is getting very scientific…

"Snape is an evil piece of…" She curses enough to make a satisfied grin reach my mouth-muscles. "But he isn't intelligent enough to find such a line dripped with so much mystery behind, he's socially and verbally sick, I thought you knew that!" I don't speak for some time, trying to think clearly about the whole case, something very difficult at this very moment. "Look, I've got an idea. Your dad says in his letter that he's back in Scotland, sending an owl to his home should take less than two hours really, if you send a letter explicitly asking him whether or not Snape is your stepfather, I'm sure you could get an answer before tomorrow morning, it's only…" She checks the clock on her bedside table. "Four, you might even get answer before midnight."

"You're right." I answer suddenly my mind cleared up, "I'll do that, give me some parchment, and my pen and some ink, you can find a bottle in my trunk there." The girl let me order her around freely as I point at certain parts of our dorm, soon I have all I need to write a letter. This is bound to be the shortest letter ever.

Dad,

I'm old enough to know the truth, is Snape Samuel's biological father?

Liz.

"Well it surely is clear!" Mel says making me jump a little as I hadn't realized she was reading over my shoulder. "Come on, send it now, where's your owl?" At the mention a little hoot is being heard, seemingly that useless thing more commonly called 'my owl' has followed me around, maybe he sensed my unhappiness, maybe he has feelings for me after all! Before I get too enthusiast about my possible love affair with an owl I tie my letter to its paw and ask it to send it straight to my dad.

Since we have nothing else to do but bother each other for the remaining time we decide to chill out, gossip about the girls, the teachers, the boys even, play around, gossip, plan pranks, gossip, laugh at each other's stupid and mostly not-attended-to-be jokes oh and did I mention gossip?

We are actually fooling around, Melaina went to the bathroom, and when she comes back I'm hidden behind the door eating some sort of crunchy chocolate bar, as planned she starts looking around the dorm to find me as I follow her around with the crunching noise, which freaks her out, something she won't admit but that I know for sure.

"You you, pervy chocolate gay!" she shrieks upon discovering me hiding behind her.

"I ain't gay…" I crunch back at her.

"Yes, all chocolate freaks are, look at…at er…at chococactus!" We both burst into laughter at the mention of this 'name' or rather nickname. Chococactus was the name we gave to my crush. Over then I was an 'innocent' fifth year and he a 'mature' and 'virile' seventh year. He once ate chocolate bread roll, and his name had been given to him because seemingly his parents were some botanic freaks and gave plant names to all of their kids, his was the name of a cactus… Sometimes Mel also likes referring to him as Mr. 'There's no water left.' Because that's the longest sentence we ever heard him utter in his deep and oh so sexy voice that I really miss nowadays.

"He wasn't GAY!! And and LUPIN is also a choco-freak!"

"Yea, he's clearly gay!"

"Is not!"

"Is."

"IS NOT!!! You don't even have arguments, and don't say the chocolate part is an argument! It doesn't count!"

"Alright, I have loads of other arguments. Like, he looks into people's eye each and every time."

"What does that have to do with gayism?" I ask dumbly. (Yes we even invent our own terms.)

"Erm…I don't know, but admit he has that freaky stare."

"I knooow, he's so evil when he stares at you." I exclaim excitedly.

"Yea, it's like he looks through your soul…and clothes." We both burst out laughing madly exclaiming 'ew's here and there when we are able to. "No but really, and I'm sure he's a perv."

"What makes you say this?"

"You know what they say about silent nerdy guys…" She starts laughing as I make hissing noise to express my disapproval. "Anyway, he's a weirdo."

"That he is, even his name is weird…Lupin, it sound so Lip pun alike…"

"Lipun and what about Remus, backwards it gives almost summer."

"Oh my…and Lupin backwards gives…"

"NIPUL!!" She exclaims in a high-pitched tone to then needlessly add: "Like…like nipple." And then I know…we're both screwed.

Wednesday 15th September 1993

We have a short test of Defence Against the Dark Arts today, luckily it's only the very last class, so plenty of time to study it…start studying it. Yea, I haven't even opened my book yet since start of term, so what? I'm not in Slytherin for nothing, if I was a nerdy person I would've been sorted into Ravenclaw, or even Huffelpuff, since it's for the hum 'hard-working' or even in Gryffindor, since that's for the oh so courageous lions, right.

It's all unfair anyway, we Slytherins are in fact the lazy manipulating people, and school should also be adapted to us so we can use all of our cunning skills in lessons, instead all we need in lessons is courage, intelligence and studying. Well I have none of these!

Actually, Hogwarts isn't really fair. Slytherin is seen as the next generation of Death Eaters, full of bulky stupid guys and slutty artificial girls (mostly blondes). Well let me tell you, I'm neither for you-know-who, neither a slut (you may call me a bitch though, no problem with that) and not artificial (neither blonde). Whereas Gryffindor is seen as the best house ever, all courage and brain and beauty.

Even if I admit, yes yes we have our count of sluts in Slytherin, think of Rose, but I can sum up much more Ravenclaw, Gryffindor and Huffelpuff sluts altogether only in my year than all the sluts of my house from first till seventh year.

The point is that Hogwarts is full of favouritism and even though I hate the man I must admit that Snape has realized that. He's a brute, true, but he brings some balance in the entire favouritism of Hogwarts. Dumbledore favours Gryffindors, everything favours Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Huffelpuff, let us at least have Snape then (and a bit of cheating)!

And there chimes the bell and I haven't studied my Defence against the dark arts yet, oh well I still have Herbology this afternoon, and the afternoon break itself…alright, I'm screwed and will once again rely on my classmates to copy on, I'm sure Melaina will know some of the answers.

Herbology was the horror, no really it was a living hell. The plant had somehow fixed me for Merlin knows what reason. It ended up in loads of running and hiding and all the pretty Gryffins, Puffs and Ravens to laugh at me, yay, there goes my bit of reputation. Have no time to mourn about that though, we have a test remember, have to prepare myself, have to talk to Eliza and Rose so I can sit somewhere close to them, damn remembered now Rose doesn't take this class, alright will be easier with Eliza alone then and Melaina of course, but I don't have to ask permission with her.

It's with high hopes that I enter the room, Eliza admitted that she owed me for like three years ago when I told her the teacher would ask something about mermaids and by luck it came out to be true so she'll let me copy and Melaina's here too, so I should have at least something like an average, that is until Lupin smiles at us to then tell it's a practical test. First horrible news, second: I have to go first, so there's no way I can at least look how the others do it. Can it be worse? Yes, why, of course it can be as he leans to me to tell he'd like a word after class, great.

After all, the test went rather fine, what did I say about Slytherins being cunning eh, wait does that mean Lupin is pro-Slytherin after all in his tests? No time to think about that though as I have to see the man himself right now. Oh, I'm not the only one, seems like Milly's got to stay too.

"Ah yes, I would like to know why both of you skipped my class yesterday?" Wait we skipped…oh yeah that Snape thing, I remember now, I wonder when my owl will be back…why is he looking at me like that…oh right he asked something.

"I have been excused from classes by my head of house sir."

"Alright may I see the excuse." It's not a question as he extends his hand already.

"He hasn't really written it down that is he just told me I was excused." I explain fidgeting with my hands.

He frowns allowing his hand inside one of the pockets of his robe. "Be sure I'll ask Professor Snape about it." I nod slightly pursing my lips together in irritation, he has nothing against Slytherins but against me, why would it be elseway that he let Mel go with a lame excuse of 'I didn't feel well' and me with a super-excuse like 'I was excused by my head of house' as if I would lie about that! If I were to lie it would be lame too! How I hate that…nipul! Hah!

And to make it all worse I still haven't gotten any letter back from my dad. Oh fine, I won't be able to sleep at all with all that Lupin, Snape and dad stuff, how I hate school, can't I be left alone?

Thursday the 16th of September 1993.

Argh, first classes are torture!! Certainly when you didn't have the time to eat more than a big bite of toast, because you were late again, because your mind was too sleep deprived to register the 'slight tingling' of your three alarm-clocks. As I feel the collywobbles taking over once more I start turning the pages of my book wildly to cover up the noise. It's almost an automatism after seven years.

Right when professor Lupin is talking about some dangerous curse I get a sudden urge to eat chocolate. 'Some is sticking out of his pocket' My little mind soon informs me, for that I seem to be extremely bright, but when it comes to classes, little mind goes off to sleep seemingly and let me make a complete fool of myself. Useless thing!

"Maybe you know the answer?" Why do teachers sense the inattention? Do they have a sixth sense? Must be.

"Huh-" I can still feel some drool dripping from the corner of my mouth, luckily not from my chin, that would be really bad. "chocolate..." I murmur still being half in my reverie.

"Excuse me, I didn't catch that."

"Blue, say blue!" Melaina whispers furiously from next to me.

"Green..." I answer not really knowing why as I give a wide-eyed dumb look.

"Yes indeed, the killing curse turns out to be green." Alright scrap what I said before: my mind isn't that useless after all!

"And do you know how it pronounces." Lupin asks on, I wonder briefly: why push the matter, as long as you know it's green no need to know more.

"Eh, just like...'killing' and then 'curse'..." Really these teachers nowadays, they think we're retarded. Then again there are some pretty stupid people around here...it's not a reason to go so far to asking how to pronounce 'killing curse' really.

"Er- no," that little bit of hope soon leaves Lupin's eyes "But to know that it is green is already of high importance, wizards pronounce it 'Avada Kedavra', and-"

Alright: re-rescrap, I do have a useless mind as a matter of fact. Sure I wasn't paying attention either so my mind couldn't know, but when you're in a horribly bad mood, in need of food and daydreaming about feeling the softness of your bed and then you make a fool out of yourself, you have that big need to find someone to blame it all upon, in this case my own mind is the first things that pops up.

Luckily, for my own sanity, the bell rings at the point where my pen started to tremble in the need to scratch something, anything at all. It's in a hurry that I get out of the classroom, soon followed by Melaina, we both have our next classes outside, and it's raining, well at least I'll be inside a greenhouse…not that it's better for the health with all those freaky plants. For a moment I was scared that Lupin would ask me to have a word in private and would ask me about my absence yesterday, I wonder if he actually did ask Snape about it, and if he did, what Snape answered…

"Do I have to give Hagrid the greetings from you?" Mel asks trying to sheer up the sensibly tense atmosphere circling around me like mist.

"No, but do watch if he still wears his shitty pants." I grin back using our old insider joke. One day we noticed that Hagrid had really weird pants, kind of like as if he had taken old brown pants, unstitched them at the bottom and stitched some really weird coloured brown lap there in the middle of the two parts. The result of this is that at his bottom there's another colour, so it looks like he…well let himself go in his pants.

"Sure, I'll have a close look." She laughs back before we go separate ways. It's only by lunchtime that I get her answer: yes he still wears the same shitty pants from back since our third year.

"Do you think it's because he's not paid enough." I wonder out loud, or better I wonder out loud so that Melaina would hear my wondering, it's not like you wonder out loud by accident ever, or if you do, you're insane…alright I must wonder out loud without realizing once in a while.

"Maybe, who knows, he doesn't indeed have a lot of belongings and all, very modest life he leads." She frowns clearly thinking about it.

"Yea, is it even fair he's stuck in that hut while all other teachers have a nice and comfy suite inside the castle and are being served by house-elves." I know Hagrid has asked to be able to live on his own and that's the reason why he lives off the castle, but just to make Mil react I play the game.

"Hm, well then again he does have to work as a gamekeeper, so it's possibly practically easier to have a house outside." She retorts making me know I have to find something else.

"I'm sure he's not even paid, that story reeks illegality for miles away!" Melaine and I both stare evilly at Dumbledore at the same time as he looks back giving a polite nod and smile…we don't even respond, staring angrily.

"Yea…I'm sure he's using Haggers." I rumble lowly.

"Poor Hagrid, he always talks about Dumbledore so highly." Mil moans looking sweetly at Hagrid who just sat himself down at the staff table.

"He's so being manipulated!" I growl on completely ignoring Mil's statement.

We go on mumbling stuff about 'unfair', 'manipulation', 'promotion' or even 'enhance' when we hear a much too cheery voice from behind us.

"Who's talking about breast enhancement?!" Yes it practically screamed it…seeing the faces gawping at us I think it would be fair enough to scrap the 'practically' and replace it by 'absolutely'. Even the teachers are looking…Merlin! Even Lupin is looking with that weird 'I'm looking through your clothes' stare dripped with amusement…so that would be a 'I'm looking through your clothes and enjoying the show' look??

"Jeffrey! A bit of withhold wouldn't hurt, we're eating !!"

Jeffrey Watters, our living hell, or better Melaina's living hell, I can easily get away with it. He's one year below us and just because we once, or better Melaina once saved him from a bullying he thinks he's owned the title of 'best-friend' yes, not even just friend, but completely 'best-buddy-friend' as he calls himself once in a while (this being once every three minutes in our proximity). Did I mention he has no manners, ah seemingly I haven't mentioned any of his so many antics. First off he has this weird accent, nobody knows where it is from, it sounds almost American, and yet he has nothing to do with America…which is just weird. Secondly he never heard of deodorant or soap for the matter. Thirdly he has that booming voice, I wonder if he realizes that. And lastly, as I mentioned before, he has almost no manners, in the way that he never knows when not to scream things aloud and doesn't understand the term 'private'. Luckily enough, and I never thought these words would form even in my mind, we're summoned to class by the bell. I could've hugged Flitwick and seeing Melaina's teary eyes I think she was already thinking about shagging the little man as a way of thanking.

Telling myself I'm saved for at least the day I am happily prancing like a…er…newborn calf…or foal, only for the sound of it, amongst the other students, little did I know that just around the corner laid another horrible time for me to spend. I discover it soon enough though, too soon if you ask me. Oh no, I can't help but think the second I see it, hide me please anyone, after the Watters confrontation I can't take the Ian Streets one. Ian is kind of my ex boyfriend I never dated with.

"Oh isn't he the guy our dear Hope had H.A. for." Why Merlin why, what have I done today that was so wrong! Even the 'H.A.' for 'heartache' is enervating, and why is Watters even following us…unless he's getting into stalking…in that case I better kill myself now, I'm sure Mil would agree to do this with me.

"Did you really?" Ian asked almost happy, his black eyes looked almost happy. I should be honest with this, but wait good relations start on honesty…should I lie then and give false hope?

"No?" Oh Merlin, did I just say no in the same way someone normal would've tried a very hopeful yes-please-ask-me-out-now? Seemingly, as a glint of hope shines in his eyes for a second before completely disappearing and be replaced by sadness as he catches up on the word I uttered itself instead of the way I said it.

"Oh…you didn't?" I can't understand how people can fall down to pity, it's so embarrassing, not only for the one asking for pity but also for the one having to give it. I almost want to spit at him with a 'I pity you'.

"Well I em, I wondered of course how you were and all…haven't I owled you about all of this." I know Slytherins are known to be cold-hearted, but seemingly I'm failing in this as a Slytherin, I just can't make my mind up to be downright mean in front of the person itself.

"Ah yes, thanks for the nice card, it was really sweet." card…card…I never sent a card!!! I meant the almost-hate mail saying in an almost polite way I didn't want to hear about him anymore and no, I didn't feel like getting any news.

"Ah erm, you're like…welcome, I supposed it was good to send you one for erm…" He doesn't answer so I have to fill it in myself "Christmas?"

"My birthday actually." He smiles broadly, I don't see why he would, I just forgot why I ever sent him a card…card that I never sent, but that's in his vision.

"Yeaaa, that's the one, sorry, my mind is swirling, drifting, you know, heheheh…" I follow by a lot of nervous laughter, I'm so pathetic, I pity myself for my shitty social skills around guys, that is.

"We should probably talk about this in a 'tête-à-tête', what do you think of a nice walk around the lake by full moon this month?" He grins stupidly probably proud for 1) being able to insert a French word in a casual conversation and 2) being romantic about it. I suddenly remember I hated his grin over then too, it gives me some kind of animalistic instincts to wipe it away the hard way.

"Yes but full moon has already passed this month." I grit through my teeth and his grin falters at once.

"Well next month then?" He pushes on.

"Want to go wild??" Jeffrey asks suddenly wriggling his eyebrows, how can I not hate boys after that? Actually I don't know what to do, laughing hard at this, or just scream and punch…or cry, cry seems an ok option.

"Thank you Jeffrey but I don't think so, see you around Ian." Ah fleeing, that's my favourite option out of all.

"W…wait!" Oh no, not the dramatic 'run after' move. "I'm sorry that was a bad idea, what about this weekend, just a little talk on the grounds, lets say, upcoming weekend." Why is he so badly clinging, why doesn't he get the darn point! Oh right, someone sent a card with my name on it, if I ever find out who!!...I'd also like to know just what was written on it…

"I have to prepare myself mentally for my first Flying lesson of the year." Finally flying lessons getting a use!

"Oh and what about next weekend then?" He asks on making me start subtly searching for my wand in my inner pockets, I know I put it there somewhere.

"I don't know, we'll see, I can't really tell now haven't made up my planning yet." Get the point get the pooooiiiint!!!! I try to mentally tell him, due to the lack of my wand, where the heck have I put this ruddy wand, when a freakish laughter breaks my concentration.

"Planning?! As if you ever planned something in your life!" A lot of self-control needed here.

"Well it does happen once in a while I, for example, planned the day I'd delightfully kick that nose of yours till it looks worst than Snape's." I retort coldly.

"I heard that Finry, detention." Arrghhh I must be dead by a nasty heart attack. I'm being spied upon and seemingly not only by Snape alone, he's walking next to Lupin, as if the couple would ever appear in nature next to each other if there wasn't some kind of plan behind the concept. I'm sure they were eavesdropping, oh no they eavesdropped on my pathetic talk with a pathetic boy who's pathetically clinging on a pathetic person like me…this is a lot of pathetic at once, wonder if I can take it…might as well add some more of it now I got so far…after all, I think I'm having a certain affection for the word pathetic.

"But sir, I was talking about someone else! Otherwise I'd have said professor Snape, why of course!" He's not falling for it. The arched eyebrow is clearly not a good sign.

"May I know who bears my name that you know outside the school staff." How I want to answer 'my half-brother' and break down in tears to then cling at his collar and slap/punch him repeatedly and dramatically, the kind of slutty punches that never hurt, until I completely break down, I wonder if Lupin would catch me and soothe me, oh temptation is big suddenly.

"My grandmother's grandmother sister's son…he has a cousin at his wife's side, well this cousin's little cousin's child married someone who has a brother. That's the one I meant. Far off family surely, but we're very close sentimentally!" Would anyone fall for this? Probably not…or maybe Watters, he seems to right now, his forehead screwed in concentration as he tries to focus, but the effort of finding the family tights should at least be worth something, deserve some pardon.

"Miss Finry, I have proved to be very patient with you and your…antics," he pronounces this in that slow and dangerous way of his which means I'm in trouble, "but I want to make myself clear that my patience has its limits. I believe you know what I mean." It's not a question, but seemingly stupidity is very contagious, today is going to be a scientific prove of this contagion.

"No." I reply looking innocently (see this as 'dumbly') "I'm being totally serious about me grandmother's grandmother…"

"Spare me the fairy tale!!" He cuts in his nostrils flaring in anger.

"But it's true!!" I'm screwed…until I get that sudden flash of a super-idea, yes, flashes happen to even the stupidest and most hopeless people amongst us, a message to all the bimbos walking around school, never lose hope! "Ask my father!"

Touché might I say. The second I say this he's paling sensibly, his beetle black eyes stand out so much more when he's paler than with his natural vampire complexion. He doesn't even add anything and walks on his robes billowing behind him. Lupin stays a little longer, looking at me quizzically, but I merely look back with a twinge of contempt, after all, he was eavesdropping too.

As if on cue my brown lover-owl taps on a window nearby and I rush to open it up and letting it in. As soon as I do so it flies inside the corridor and makes a circle around my head before actually landing on one of the arms of a nearby high candle holder, how I hate when he circles above me like that! It's irritating, gives cramps in the neck and what a loss of time and energy too! But he's got a letter tied at its paw and my entire attention is centred on this instead. I almost jump to the owl and snatch the parchment and leg included, but since I'm still a civilized person I keep that cold self-control Slytherins are so good for.

Liz,

I had no idea what to answer to since I didn't know whether to take your letter as a joke or if you were honestly being serious about your assumption.

Anyway if you meant it, you're being completely wrong, I know your mother did some mistakes…but do consider the fact that I still had you after Samuel.

No, your brother's dad was some latino, and I know Snape has the main features for a latino if you look at it from a few miles away, but it was a real latino, so no chance it was Snape.

Have you thought about a job needing creativity and imagination? You certainly are flourishing in these sectors,

Greetings,

Dad.

He must've had fun reading my note. I wonder why Snape was acting so weirdly and downright scared he must have some secret my dad knows about but doesn't want to tell me. But it has to be very dark if my dad doesn't want to tell me…

"Aren't you going to give it a treat?" Melaina's voice asks dragging me out of my thoughts to face my owl looking at me with his face turned almost completely to the side.

"Yea, I should." I respond distractedly burying both hands in my pockets on the quest to an-old-forgotten-piece-of-food-my-owl-would-eat but finding none. "Ehm." I open my mouth to let no sound come through as I watch Melaine with a furrowed forehead.

"Here." She answers getting the point at once and handing me some bread. I thank her to give the owl the piece of bread before allowing him to retreat in the owlery. "How can your owl like you if you don't even have any treat ready for him?"

"You know Mel, it's not about the gifts you give, it's about the affection and love." I answer getting sentimental suddenly.

"I'm sorry but ehm, what do we do about that date?" I sigh inwardly, I'd silently hoped that ignoring Ian (and Jeffrey for the matter) would've made him disappear, it didn't, one more life lesson learnt.

Friday the 17th of September 1993.

'I dumped him', it's the first thought that comes to my mind as I wake up this morning, I dumped Ian, and not just dumped but completely dumped him. I was downright splendidly honest, it felt good, I've never been one to hide feelings after all. The fact that I was at that very moment quite irritated didn't help either for the poor bloke, but sincerely being so thick shouldn't be allowed, there should be some doctors to help against that, just like when you can't speak perfectly, you go see an orthopaedist, well it should be the same about thickness!

I wonder if he's hurt…he probably is, I wasn't really watching out for euphemisms either, saying things like 'I never even liked you', 'I've been put up to this' or, and I guess this one was pretty rough 'had it been about me and only me I'd never even have saved you a glance!'

A bit of explanation on the case: I had no choice. It could be resumed to this and don't dare saying 'people have always choice'. It all started with Rose, the very mention of her name makes me twitch badly. Ian is in fact her boyfriend's best friend, well ex-boyfriend now, I think…although I'm not sure anymore, sometimes they date, sometimes not, it's very confusing. And like in all those stories there is first heartbreak between the best friend and his girlfriend and the girlfriend needs to be replaced, so who was better than me to replace it? Right now I could think of a thousand girls, but over then it seemed like Rose only saw me to be up for the job. It all finished of in the most horrible date I've ever had, the only one too. Had it only been about the date though it'd have been fine, but even after he stalked me, asked me out on and on. Finally I was blessed by a supernatural, divine power since Ian's father kicked him out so he had to move to his mothers who lived in another country, he skipped school for a year or something. I wonder why he came back though!

"Morniiiiing" This isn't Mel's voice, I grunt when realization hits me: it's Rose's voice. "Shouldn't you get yourself ready you know after all…Ian's back." Ooooh really? I guess she assumes this is good news.

"Yes he's back and seemingly someone's sent cards to him with my name on them." Come to think of it, only the girls of my dorm knew about Ian, I've never really displayed myself with Ian in public.

"Oh he got them!" She exclaims brightly, her voice going a pitch higher. I wonder if she can swim, if she couldn't I could let her drown in the bathroom and let it come off as an accident…then again you don't really need any swimming skills to survive in a sink and drowning in them is even less common, only almost happened to me once.

"Y…you did it!!" I grunt lowly, but she takes it as a happy exclamation as it seems, alright I know I grunt a lot in the morning but there is a big difference between happy and mad, even in the morning, even with me!

"Well sometimes a relationship needs a little push forward." Well she's never pushed the relation, she downright shoved it. I'm almost scared she's going to ask me to thank her, sounds totally like her.

"Stop pushing it then! I'm not interested in Ian and I'll never be! You better stop the pushing, no, even more, you'd better tell him what you did!" Or better not, I'm scared the news would finish him off, and as much as he's bothered me, I don't think it's worth a one way ticket to Azkaban for.

"Oh sssorry!" She retorts in that sluttish way of hers before finally getting up off my bed…now I'll have to disinfect where her arse sat!

"I told her not to bother you with it, but you know how she is, she looked at me like 'Satan' had been burnt onto my forehead and did it anyway." Melaina tells me as she comes out of the bathroom with her towel clumsily around her head.

"She didn't deserve any pity from you anyway you know." I grin back at her suggesting my bad morning moods.

"Yea I know, you'd better get ready, double potions in less than ten minutes." She retorts distractedly so I have to concentrate on her words before realizing their gravity.

"Why doesn't anyone wake me!!" It's hard to wake up early when you get to sleep at two in the morning!

"I did, three times, but once I was out of sight you went back snoring." Totally me.

After much discussing and a little of arguing we're on our way to potions, of course we're already ten minutes late, luckily our Common Room is already down the dungeons. Our subject of discussion: Whether to go to potions or not. I wasn't really in the mood to, but Melaina's freaked out by Snape so she doesn't dare skive off his lessons.

"-there are innumerable properties given to- Finry and Parcher, I see you finally decided to show up and grace us with your presence, you're twenty minutes late, stay after class, now don't waste more time, sit!" I was about to protest, because hey, I'm not his lapdog! But Mel was dragging me already to the nearest sits.

Result of this lesson: Snape hates me even more than ever, yes more was possible I'd never have guessed until I saw his evil stare upon me scowling at every move I did, secondly we got another stack of homework and finally we, in I and Melaina, got detention Saturday, oh joy, we should've played truant. Oh and did I mention I have prefect duties in the weekend?

By the end of the day we all know exactly what we're going to do this weekend, see planning at Hogwarts isn't even needed, the teachers plan it all for you.

Saturday the 18th of September 1993.

This day must be the most horrible one of the term so far, and we're only 18 days away. I woke up at seven, yes seven!! and on a weekend too! If I were to tell it to anyone nobody would believe me, seven and no it wasn't because there was a good show on TV, even then I don't manage the wake. It was, grab your seat, to finish off homework, well to do homework, because it's kind of hard to finish off something you haven't even started doing yet. This went on hours and hours and I don't think I've ever welcomed lunch break so happily but at least I and Melaina were done with all our essays so far!

Then of course we had our detention with Snape, the greasy git, yes he's officially earned the title, who gives detention for being late! He knows nothing of troubled sleep! We had to clean off cauldrons. Then I and Melaina tagged around a little, did some dumb things like knocking on doors and then running off, we're so mature indeed. And at the end I had of course my prefect duties.

I caught three second years out of bed and gave them a good detention. I know cruel, but since today I know why Ravenclaws are cruel, I understand what it is to study all day and get as only satisfaction to pick on smaller kids and show your equals you're better, only I probably won't get the last one.

Sunday the 19th of September 1993.

Ah that's what I call a good sleep in. I wake up for lunch, by the time I'm acceptable we're already half-way lunch break. I know it's depressing to realize that half of your day has passed by as you were snoring, which I think isn't a useful thing, but at least I feel happy waking up and for once I'm not grumpy in the morn…well almost morning.

As I walk to the dorm with Melaina I can't help but sigh happily, it's great to see people working on their load of homework while we both have done it all.

"What are you going to do but bore yourself all day?" Melaina asks as we're going down the stairs leading to the dungeons.

"Erm…boring myself all day…, you?" I answer grinning up at what's supposed to be her head, only it's hard to see a thing at all, the dungeons are only lighted by torches and it gives pretty freaky sights.

"I don't know…lets talk rubbish about everyone while you bore yourself all day and I read stupid magazines that I'll steal in a couple of minutes from our dear absent dorm mates."

"That sounds pretty enticing to me! I go for it, Salazar!" I add to the stone wall that soon transforms into an entrance to our Common Room. The first thing we get to see, next to the fire place, is Eliza and Eva working on something, or better Eliza trying to explain something to Eva for what I suppose must be the sixth time. As we pass them by I can clearly hear it's about Flitwick's homework, I wonder where she could have a problem with it, we only had to find feathers to practice the disarming charm on, he seemingly didn't feel like having wands fly around everywhere. Finally we take the stairs leading down to reach our dormitory far below all the others.

The second we're inside I flop down on my bed and reach for my muggle game commonly called amongst muggles: gameboy. I know what you think: muggle technologies don't work at Hogwarts! But hey, I haven't only looked up charms and potions for homework in the last seven years of my live that would've been pretty meaningless. I perform the charm on it and soon it starts up.

"Found one!" Mel cries out from under Eva's bed. "Witches weekly, damn no porn."

"I don't think they'd ever dare buying a porn magazine." I retort as she gets up with some difficulty.

"You're right. We'll have to consider ourselves happy with gross questions about sex." She says casually as she plops down on her own bed.

"Gross but naïve." I add.

"Yea that's what I meant." She answers distractedly as she turns the pages rapidly looking for the questions and answers' section. "I found one here in section Ask Magda here it goes: 'Dear Magda, I lost my virginity to two guys at a party were I'd drunk too much firewisky, only my parents don't know anything about it and now I think I'm pregnant, what am I supposed to do? Greetings, Fish." Even before she finishes off reading aloud we're already laughing like mad. I wonder if the magazine doesn't invent the questions themselves, any person in his right mind wouldn't call themselves fish anyway! Now that's the problem, anyone in his right mind wouldn't get drunk and spend the night with two guys and end up probably pregnant, can't you just hear the drama!

"Oh oh this one from Ask Andrew: Dear Andrew, my dad has a new girlfriend ten years my senior and I think I'm in love with her. Each time I make love to my own girlfriend I think of her instead, what should I do, should I confront someone with it? Greets, a desperate lover."

"Aaaaw, 'desperate lover' that sounds so romantic really." Before I even get the time to say something as I try to make little Mario jump up a pipe Melaine's already eagerly reading another one.

"Dear Andrew, not so long ago I had my first time with a girl, but soon after my organ started stinging, now I can see small little rashes all over the tip, should I go see a mediwitch? I'd also like to add that my parents don't know about it, greets, a scared guy." I don't think we've ever laughed so much, well at least not about someone else's agony. Soon after Melaina closes the magazine and throws it to Eva's bed, it lands somewhere next to it. "Not a very interesting edition I must say, can I put some music on?" I nod a yes and soon the music's echoing against the stony walls.

After a couple of seconds the song 'I will survive' is ringing to our ears.

"Why do I have to think of Snape when I hear that song?" Melaina asks suddenly.

"Probably because you're bored and having a secret passion for him, sort of a love/hate relationship." I answer professionally mimicking the move of looking over my glasses in an analyzing way only detail is that I don't wear any.

"I see him dance on this in front of the class, Merlin! just imagine, maybe right now he's in his room dancing on this, you know first he starts with little hesitant moves and then suddenly he turns around and does a big arm move and starts disco dancing on it!"

"Melaina!" I groan, "Now I'm having all these bad mental images of Snape dancing, swishing with his hair like they do in the shampoo ads and doing all the arm moves…in disco clothing, white with glittering blue stripes!" Mel laughs like mad, even though I'm sure she doesn't know what a shampoo ad is, but I'm sure she gets the point…well the image that is.

The fun comes to an end soon after though, when Rose barges in. We have to stop the music because seemingly she's in a bad mood, something about her boyfriend not giving her enough time for herself….right…I'll never understand their relationship, one time it's all great (read: when he invites her somewhere and pays/gives her a gift) and the other she 'needs time for her own'.

The next hour is a living hell: after twenty minutes of Rose's grumbling I decide to put on the music anyway, that's when she explodes telling my head off for being so noisy, NOISY, me, she's only been grumbling about for a good twenty minutes and I'm the one being noisy! Me being me of course, I can't let it go like Melaina does, no, I have to retaliate, say she's bloody selfish and that we were here first so if she isn't happy she should better just leave. That's when she gets even worse, yelling at me. I'm like…one month older than her! But in terms of years I'm one year older and that's the respect she's showing me. I'm deeply disappointed in the new generations, ah in my time…

Luckily I manage to flee the dorm since I have prefect duty. Seems like all the things I normally hate to do come in handy these last few days, first flying lessons, now prefect duties, I might start liking all of these!

[a/n I'm really sorry this took so long to update, but I had loads of exams at school and so forth and had no free time in which I could write anymore for a long period. I'm glad to tell you that I'm back though, so updates should come faster now.

Reviews are really appreciated, I always try to reply to all my reviews, so please feel free to leave me one, even criticism is fine as long as it might help me improve. Thanks for reading!