A/N: I forgot what I wanted to write here.

. : Tech Trends: Naruto Unveils New Model for his Sexy no Jutsu : .

Konohagakure no Sato, Fire Country -

Apprentice to the legendary hermit and Genin Naruto Uzumaki gave the public a first glimpse of Naruko, the latest incarnation of his highly lauded line of Sexy no Jutsu girls, during his weekly visit to the Hokage's office on Monday.

The 67.5 inch, 110 pound beauty – a result of many months of dedicated research and training from Jiraiya – is taller, tighter, and more voluptuous than last month's model, Naru, by a significant margin.

"Naru just looked a little too young, which may have worked well for younger audiences and pedophiles, but less so for the more traditional crowd." said Hideo Hentaiecchi, bathhouse owner and experienced victim of Naruto's perverted jutsu ever since it's introduction last year. "Also, Naru's whisker marks just made the entire model appear a little too fetishist. By removing the marks and implementing simpler, more subconscious-level allures, Naruto has ensured that his Sexy no Jutsu will continue to work on a wider range of men.

Naruto expects that his new Naruko model will help to open up entire new venues for him to exploit.

"With Naruko, I'm introducing a range of cutting-edge perverted attributes that my last model Naru could only dream of," Naruto said during a recent demonstration, in which Naruko smoothly and effortlessly infiltrated a high-end lingerie shop that he was kicked out of before.

"The combination of much larger breasts, healthier looking hair, and updated poses allows my new model to not only please my male fans, but make the girls feel a natural jealousy as well." Naruto also reported that early testing of the model has produced promising results, claiming a 71 percent reduction in 'getting-caught-and-beat-to-a-blood-pulp' incidents.

Along with the improved attributes mentioned above, Naruko also sports slightly darker-looking skin, less imposing smoke upon it's creation, and is fully backwards-compatible with Naruto's other flagship technique, the Harem no Jutsu.

Also, for a more customized approach to perversion, Naruko will be released in four different hair colors, with analysts expecting the blonde model to be more popular than the brunette or redhead one. The fourth color, a fluorescent purple, is still undergoing beta testing at this time.

Expert and famed novelist, Jiraiya, so far has praised the redesign, particularly the more mature type of sexiness the new model exudes. "I knew that reading my Icha Icha books to [Naruto] while he slept would eventually pay off," said Jiraiya, who plans to feature the new model in his next book. "It brings a joyful tear to my eye, and blood down my nose, whenever I get a good look at Naruko. I'm proud of her—err him."

Analysts report that Naruto's only real competition comes from his self-proclaimed apprentice, Konohamaru. The young grandchild of the Third Hokage has so far released two of his own Sexy no Jutsu models, Ko-chan and her Double Knockout Girls no Jutsu lesbian partner Hamaru. But because Ko-chan and Hamaru are still under-refined, according to lead experts, Naruko's appeal will likely prove much broader.

Women everywhere can expect to see Naruko bathing with them as early as tomorrow.