Pairings: This chapter contains slight Hisagi x Hinamori, slight Kira x Hinamori, slight Ikkaku/Yumichika, and Renji x Rukia
Rating: M
Warnings: There is also slight OOC, language and minor sexual material
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach Tite Kubo does.

Where could he have gone, why would he leave me alone like this? Ikkaku walked down the streets, the clouds in the sky blocking out the sun. As he passed officers in the 11th Division, he could no longer look at them. They weren't comrades anymore, they were enemies. He knew that there was nothing left if Yumichika was no longer beside him. He knew that the world was slowly going to stop on its axis as he went through this life much longer while his friend was gone.

He watched as other shinigami passed him, looking at them with cold eyes. They all caused this, they all made Yumichika leave, he closed his eyes trying to block out that day. Who was there to trust anymore? His division, his whole society had betrayed him. He couldn't think of this world without Yumichika, everything was gone in that instant where he left. Only misery remained.

"I guess I should just give up…" he sighed as he walked by the 6th Division.

Just then he looked up to see a ghost standing in the doorway of the building, his heart stopping as he looked deeper into the eyes of the person that was standing before him. He had known that face, but he had not known the eyes that were looking at him. He took a step forward to see the man unfazed by him. Ikkaku never thought that he would find him here, in the 6th Division, a lieutenant crest on his arm. But at he looked into those eyes, he knew he had not. That was not Yumichika.

"Yumi…" Ikkaku breathed. "Is that you?"

Yumichika looked up at him as he took a step forward. "It's Ayasegawa-fukutaichou to you, Madarame," Ikkaku froze as that voice cut through him like a sword. "I will be referred to by no other name than that which I have just given you," he walked right past the 3rd seat, a chill going down his spine. "And the 11th Division is that way isn't it?" he pointed to his left.

"Yumichika…" Ikkaku gasped. "I'm been looking everywhere for you," he placed his hands on the lieutenant's shoulder's only to be pushed away.

"Don't touch me," Yumichika breathed. "That's an order."

Ikkaku closed his eyes as he shook his head. "What happened to you?"

He opened his eyes to look at Yumichika; he was no longer his beautiful self. Dark circles were under his lifeless grey eyes, his hair was tussled, his skin no longer having his sun rivaling glow. He was no longer Yumchika, he was Lieutenant Ayasegawa of the 6th Division. Ikkaku shook his head as he realized what had occurred, Zaraki had killed him.

"I don't know what you mean…" Yumichika breathed as he looked into Ikkaku's eyes. "Other than being run out of a division by my so called best friend, nothing happened to me," he shook his head. "I want nothing to do with you or your division. I have to forget about everything to keep my sanity. I can't look at you. I don't want to remember…"

Ikkaku stepped forward, grasping Yumichika's arm. "Yumichika…"

"Let go, or I'll scream."

"Yumichika," Ikkaku breathed as he looked into the lieutenant's burning eyes. "Please…"

"Let go of me…. 11th Division garbage!" Yumichika yelled. "Let go Madarame Ikkaku!"

Ikkaku did as the officer said, watching the fire in his eyes start to die down as he ran a hand through his messy dark hair. He closed his eyes as he thought about that hair, it was so soft, it was so beautifully enticing. He remembered when he used to touch that hair, feel that skin; they were nothing but memories now. His beauty was gone, but yet Ikkaku still thought he was beautiful. Ikkaku sighed as he looked deeper at the lieutenant, seeing those cold eyes looking at him again.

"What are you looking at?" Yumichika asked.

"Nothing…" Ikkaku breathed as he started to walk forward. "Nothing at all…"

He closed his eyes as he looked back one last time at the lieutenant. He was a lieutenant now, above what he was in the 11th Division. He took a deep breath as he walked past the 11th Division, this was no longer with them, he walked beyond the 12th as well, making his way to the 13th, walking to the door seeing the captain in the doorway.

"He's a lieutenant!" Ikkaku roared as he looked at the 13th Division captain. "Did you know about this?"

Renji looked at Ikkaku. "They don't inform the captains of lieutenant promotions," he took a step forward as he looked into Ikkaku's eyes. "What division? 3rd, 5th, or 9th?"

"6th!" Ikkaku answered, seeing Renji's eyes widen. "Yeah, your old spot. Kuchiki has taken no time at all to replace you. You've been gone for only a few months and already he's got someone new."

Renji shook his head. "I didn't think Byakuya would be the first."

Ikkaku almost stopped breathing as he heard Renji refer to the captain by his informal name. "Did you just call him Byakuya?"

Renji looked up at Ikkaku. "Yeah, why not? I'm a captain too, and he is the brother of my fiancée. I think I have the right to call him Byakuya."

Ikkaku bowed his head. "It's just strange. You've become a captain, it seems like only yesterday I was training you how to fight in the 11th Division. You've grown so much, and yet I've stayed the same…"

"Ikkaku-san…" Renji sighed. "I still think you could kick my ass in a fight. I got this promotion because Byakuya thought it was the only way I could be worthy enough to marry his sister, not because of my skill. You're responsible for all that I've accomplished. I thank you for that."

As Ikkaku was about to open his mouth, Rukia appeared in the doorway. "Renji…" she breathed as she walked to her captain's side. "I have to go help some of the squads train; I'll be back by sundown."

"Sundown? That's a long time," Renji breathed as she looked into his eyes. "Are you sure that you're going to be alright, maybe I should go…"

"I'll be fine…"

"You're not feeling well…" Renji answered as he looked into his fiancée's eyes. "I think that maybe we should calm down just a little."

"Renji," Rukia looked into her captain's eyes. "I'm your lieutenant first… we can't let your emotions cloud your judgment toward me. I'll be fine."

As Rukia walked away, Ikkaku looked up at Renji, seeing stiffness within his eyes. "We've been fighting lately…"

Ikkaku nodded. "I can see that this transition isn't easy for you either. I lost Yumichika and you're losing Rukia. But at least you have a division that hasn't turned their back on you."

"Everything will be alright; I'll talk with Byakuya about this later on today. I have to speak with him about Rukia anyway," Renji smiled at Ikkaku as he knew the 3rd seat was going to leave.

Ikkaku saw through that smile, he knew that Renji was hurting deep inside of his heart. He knew that Kuchiki had betrayed him. Throughout all of this, Renji thought that he was near and dear to Kuchiki's heart, not just some pawn that he loved to play with. Ikkaku felt the same way when he looked at the 11th Division; they were already considering promoting a new 5th seated officer. Everything was changing.

He was haunted by eyes; Yumichika's eyes were a lifeless grey color, all of the beauty starting to drain from him. He was no longer the bright, blossoming Yumichika that Ikkaku had known for ages; he was the lieutenant of the 6th Division now. There was no comfort from this. He had known what happened to an 11th Division member when they transformed into a lieutenant, they would become Iba. He closed his eyes as he thought about how even Renji had it now, he was a captain, so much responsibility on his shoulders. Ikkaku saw everything that he had once held dear to himself start to crumple away and disappear like embers. He had nothing to lean on.

"Renji…" Ikkaku breathed, hearing the captain stir, his rust colored eyes looking forward. "Thank you…"

Renji closed his eyes as he nodded. "No problem…"

Ikkaku looked longer at the 13th Division captain; he was starting to lose his mind during his fights with Rukia. He was no longer Renji, he was becoming Kira.

0o0o0o0o0o0

"You're free to go now…" Isane smiled as she started to detach Hisagi from all of the wires which he was connected to, her eyes moving to meet those of the 9th Division captain. "You must be excited."

Hisagi was silent as he felt the wires leaving his body. He put a hand to his chest feeling the cursed heart beating in his chest. He closed his eyes as he tried to remember that day when Aizen walked through the door, killing all of their hope and future. Aizen, Ichimaru, and Tousen had done more damage to the Soul Society that anyone thought was possible. That night was the most desperate night that they had ever experienced, all of them banding together to destroy the ghost who had wanted to kill them, but they had failed. Aizen still lived.

Hisagi felt him, he felt him as if he had never died. His heart beat faster as he recalled the day, Aizen's presence coming back to his mind. He could feel his blood turn into ice, he could feel his whole soul blacken as he felt his chest, that pulse forming tears in his eyes. He was never going to forget that night, it lived on within him. Aizen wasn't dead; he was still with him at all times.

"You could say so…" he whimpered

Isane sighed at Hisagi's reaction. "I know that you're disgusted with yourself, but you have to understand that those emotions will go away."

"Will they?" Hisagi asked. "Will they ever go away, Isane? Will I ever have a day when he isn't with me? While this heart beats, he's still living. I can feel his presence; I can feel his body inside of mine…"

Isane bowed her head as she thought about it. "It'll be alright."

"No," he answered. "It won't. No one is going to treat me the same. I'm like Aizen to them… everyone feels that way."

"Hinamori doesn't…"

Hisagi sighed. "Hinamori's different…"

"Why? What is Hinamori to you?" Isane asked.

Hisagi closed his eyes as he remembered all of the moments he and the current 5th Division captain had shared. All of the kisses were still on his lips, all of her caresses were still upon his skin. The warmth that she admitted was always with him, she was his everything. Yet as he was in the 4th Division, he knew that she was out there with Kira living with his love for her. She could be happy out there in the world. She could be falling in love with Kira, a love that Kira had longed for and deserved. He let her go, but it was her memory that had kept him alive for all of these weeks.

"She's a dear friend…" Hisagi smiled.

"Friend?" Isane asked. "I have to disagree with you, Hisagi-taichou. The way that you look at each other, there is no way that she's only a friend…"

"Is it obvious?" Hisagi asked.

"Everyone can tell," she breathed. "And Iba-san told me…"

"Iba-san…" Hisagi smiled before he took a deep breath, thinking deeper about the 5th Division captain. "How is Hinamori?"

"She trains most of the day, sometimes she comes by here while you're sleeping and sits next to you for a while. There isn't a day she doesn't think about you, Hitsugaya-taichou doesn't know what's going on with her, and Kira-taichou is starting to suspect," Isane explained. "I think he knows about you…"

Hisagi closed his eyes before he heard a voice from the doorway. "Hisagi…"

Isane looked in the doorway. "Iba-san!"

At those words, Hisagi opened his eyes. "Iba-san! What are you doing here?"

Iba walked forward. "Komamura-taichou sent me to see how you were doing, he heard you were getting out today. We were concerned about you."

Hisagi took a deep breath as he looked at the 7th Division lieutenant. "I've been better."

"You still look pale," Iba states as he looked at the captain. "And you're so thin. You don't even look like yourself anymore…"

Hisagi closed his eyes, it was true, his skin had turned an almost ghoulish white, his once muscular frame losing some of its build. As he looked at himself, he didn't even think he was Hisagi Shuuhei anymore, all he saw was the scar that ran down his chest, feeling the beating heart behind it. He looked up at Iba, a weak smile rolling no his face.

"I've been sick for a while," Hisagi breathed. "I've been on so many drugs…"

"Drugs?" Iba asked. "Are you still going to be on drugs?"

Hisagi closed his eyes as he nodded. "This is going to absorb my life…"

"Well at least it takes your mind off of Hinamori," Iba responded.

Hisagi shook his head. "It doesn't… nothing will…" he looked at the shocked lieutenant. "Every second, every moment that passed me behind these walls; her face came to my mind. Iba-san, I can't do this anymore…"

He closed his eyes as he thought of that day, the day he let her go. He was never alright with that moment, and his hopelessness forced him to run into enemy lines, his uselessness forced him to destroy his life. But through it all, he could only think of her. He closed his eyes as he felt his body start to shake, tears forming, he couldn't take this game anymore.

"Hisagi-taichou…" Isane breathed, standing next to Hisagi's bed.

Hisagi looked at Iba. "I don't want to be without her anymore… I love her…" he took a deep breath. "I wanted so long to try to get her off my mind, but I can't, Iba-san. Every time she comes near me… I was an idiot for letting her even think about going off with Kira…"

Iba sighed, placing a hand on Hisagi's shoulder, the captain's eyes lighting up. "Hisagi-taichou…" he breathed as he looked into the 9th Division leader's eyes. "This is a dangerous time to want to pursue Hinamori-taichou further; she belongs to Kira-taichou."

Hisagi took a deep breath. "I don't care about the cost anymore. No matter what I do, Kira is going to get hurt. I should start looking out for myself now."

Iba smiled as he looked into Hisagi's eyes. "That's the Hisagi I know…"

At that moment, Hisagi knew that the burden that was hurled upon him, the curse that was cast was going to ease up. He placed a hand on his chest and closed his eyes; this was all going to get better. He would make sure of that.

0o0o0o0o0o0

Rukia walked into the room, seeing Renji lying in bed sleeping soundly. She walked forward, sitting next to him on the bed. She ran her fingers along his jaw line as he slept. She closed her eyes as she heard him breathing, his lips slightly parted with every inhalation. He lay on his back, face up, his head turned gently to the left as his left arm rested next to his head, his hand curled in a fist. He looked relaxed.

She moved her fingers to dance through his bright red hair, her eyes fixated on the locks that were tied back into his ponytail. Rukia sighed as she moved closer to place a light kiss on his parted lips, hearing a soft coo pass his lips as he started to stir at her presence. His eyes opened to look at her, rust colored irises glowing gently in the starlight of the night sky.

"You're back," he breathed, a smile on his face.

"Yeah," she whispered.

"What took you so long?" he asked as he started to sit up. "You've been gone all day. It's past sundown."

She looked into his eyes. "We got sidetracked," she gazed deeper as she saw all of the frustration of the day. "What happened today? You seem tense."

He took a deep breath as he moved back into sleeping position. "I tried to talk to your brother today, but he wouldn't see me. That new lieutenant of his is ever the protective man."

Rukia raised an eyebrow. "New lieutenant?"

"Yeah, Ayasegawa Yumichika of the 11th Division," Renji breathed as he looked at his lieutenant. "I should be proud, but at the same time to know that I was replaced that easily, it… it…" he closed his eyes. "It makes me realize how insignificant I really was. He replaced me as easily as he threw me away… it makes you wonder if I ever really mattered to him, if he even respected me."

Rukia sighed. "A lot happens in this world that we don't necessarily like, but we get through it anyway. Don't think of yourself as replaced," he ran her hand along his shoulder as she moved closer to him. "Think of it as Ayasegawa finally having a place in this world where he is loved and appreciated, just like you are now. Renji…" she breathed as she held him closer. "I believe that this is all going to work out for the best. We are all going to get through this; I'll talk to nii-sama tomorrow we'll see what's going on."

Renji looked out the window into the deep darkness. "Whatever the 11th Division did to that man, it was enough to destroy him. Yumichika was never like that before… he's changed…"

"Everything's changed," Rukia answered.

"Even you…" Renji breathed.

"What do you mean?" Rukia asked as her captain turned to look at her.

"What do you mean what do I mean? Rukia, there's something about you, that's really odd," he breathed. "I think we should take you to the 4th Division tomorrow, you seem really off, I just don't want you to be ill."

Rukia stared at him in fear. He was right, she had been feeling differently. She felt hostile toward Renji, but at the same time she knew that she was never going to be without him. To make matters worse, he whole body was going against her. Illness had filled her to the brim. Her stomach ached sending pain throughout her whole body. Rukia had grown ill, but now it dawned on her, she knew what it was.

"I'll go check it out tomorrow…" Rukia promised. "I will…"

Renji closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. "I guess this is going to be harder than we thought, there's something else that has happened that I think will destroy our chances of happiness. Hisagi-san was released from the hospital today."

"How is Hinamori-taichou going to take this?"

"Hinamori is going to take this fine. My question is: how is Kira going to handle this?" Renji asked.

0o0o0o0o0o0

Hisagi walked into the office of the 9th Division carrying Kyouka Suigetsu in his hand. He looked deeply at the sword as he remembered Tousen's words to him, Hisagi was the only one who could use Kyouka Suigetsu now, he was the only set of hands that were going to be touching it. He placed the sword in the corner of the office, smiling as he sat next to it.

"Hi," he smiled as he looked at the sword. "I know what you're not used to me; you were still with Aizen when all of this was going on. But Aizen's gone," he closed his eyes. "He died. I have his heart in my chest; I know that doesn't mean anything to you. I don't even know how to use you. I don't even know if I can…"

He placed his hand around the hilt, pulling the blade out of the sheath as he looked at his reflection in the mirror. "Why won't you speak to me?"

Shatter…

He heard a noise from within him, his body freezing in place. "What was that?" he held the blade tighter. "What are you trying to say?"

Shatter…

He closed his eyes as he held the sword tighter. "Shatter?" he smiled as he held onto the sword. "Shatter…" he breathed, holding the sword in front of him. "Kyouka Suigetsu…"

He smiled as he felt the power course through his body. Tousen was right; he was the only one who could use this. He closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. This was more power that his body was used to, but it felt so good. His heart raced as the power pulsed through him, his breathing starting to choke as it ran deeper. It was never like this with Kazeshini, this wasn't the way that he had ever experienced power before; this was stronger, rawer, and greater than he had ever felt. This was the power that Aizen had wielded. This was the power that they had feared.

He opened his eyes. "I will protect this, Tousen-sama," he breathed as he put a hand over his heart, his other grasping the hilt of Kyouka Suigetsu. "You have my word."

This chapter had more emphasis on the Ikkaku/Yumichika as well as Hisagi's decision. I am actually proud of this chapter and thought it turned out alright.

I'm sorry that this took me so long, I had it done and then the power went out for a week, but the enxt chapter will be sooner (I'm not just saying that), it will be up before Christmas.

The next chapter will have Kira and Hinamori in it so you can see thier relationship together on a deeper level.