Pairings: This chapter contains Hisagi x Hinamori, Kira x Hinamori, Renji x Rukia, and references to: Hisagi/Kira and Ukitake x Rukia.
Rating: M
Warnings: There is also slight OOC, strong language, references to sexual material, slight alcoholism, and references violence. Also: BEWARE OF ERRORS!
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, Tite Kubo does.
Matsumoto moved to the door, hearing a knock on it. "Taichou…" there's someone at the door!" there was no response after that. "Taichou!"
She rolled her eyes as she moved to the door. Her captain usually was the one who did the work, which included opening doors. She silently cursed whoever it was behind the door asking if they could have picked a better time to come around. Yet as she opened the door, everything stopped as she saw the bruises and the small amount of blood on his face.
"Shuuhei?" Matsumoto gasped. "What the hell happened to you?"
Only one word came out of his mouth, but when Matsumoto heard it, she didn't want to believe it. "Kira."
"What the hell happened?" she asked again.
"I was walking around minding my own business, then all of a sudden he jumps me and starts threatening me. The threats were cute though," Hisagi scoffed as he walked past the lieutenant into the office. "Touch her and I'll cut that bastard's heart right out of your chest…" his words changed octave as he mocked Kira's innocent intimidating voice. "Like he'll ever get at it…"
"That was a pretty good Kira impression," she smiled. "Oh… did he really say that?"
"Yeah and that along with his candy-arm grip didn't do anything to scare me off," Hisagi scoffed.
"But you're going to handle this like an adult right?"
"I hate that. Hisagi's always the one who acts maturely. Hisagi's always the one who looks before he leaps. Hisagi's always the one who masks his emotions. Not this time, Rangiku-san," he shook his head. "Not this time… if Kira wants a fight, then he can have one. I'm done sticking up for him, I'm done protecting him, it's time that he gets a taste of his own medicine."
"Don't you want to think before you do anything?" she asked. "What are you going to do anyway?"
A smile rolled across his face. "Hinamori…"
"You're going to do Hinamori?" she asked as she tried to make sense of what he just said, it dawning on her instantly. "You're going to do Hinamori! Listen, you're angry, you're not thinking straight, maybe you should sit down for a couple of hours and blow off some steam some other way."
He shook his head. "I have only been holding back to save him, to make him think I'm not that bad of a person, but no matter what I do he's always going to attack me. So I say fuck him…"
Matsumoto closed her eyes as she heard the thickness of his anger in his voice. "This is all going to go away in a few hours after you relax for a while, Shuuhei. Don't do anything that's going to make this worse."
Shuuhei sighed as he walked past her, the clicking of his heels throwing unease into her body as she felt the frustration running through them as well. "I'm done with him. From this moment on, Hisagi Shuuhei and Kira Izuru are enemies: mortal enemies. If it's a fight that he wants, he'll have to be able to finally surpass me."
"Now you're getting physical?" Matsumoto asked. "It's not a war. This is Hinamori we're talking about. Don't get your weapons ready for something so small."
He shook his head as he ran his fingers along the bruise. "Rangiku-san, he hates me. He wants me dead no matter what happens. At least when he does kill me, and he will, Momo will get what she wants. She will finally get the love that she so desired and deserved."
Matsumoto bowed her head as she heard those words. Hisagi was truly in love with Hinamori. She had seen it from the days when they were working together to get her out of the cell, the days when Hinamori was spending prison time for Renji, the night when Kira had become a captain, the weeks that Hisagi was in the 4th Division, and even now when they were trying to conceal their emotions. All the while she saw Kira trying to covet her from Hisagi, all of the romance he once had for Hinamori seeping out of the cracks of the foundation of their relationship. Now as Hisagi and Kira had gone at war she saw the fight between love and jealousy ignite between two men who she once thought were never going to leave each other's sides. Now as Hisagi Shuuhei rested his hands up against Hitsugaya Toushirou's desk, she knew that everything that she once knew about those two was gone.
The bruises and the blood along Hisagi's body was enough for her to know that there was no turning back. All of the moments of those two together were slowly starting to slip away into a darkness that she knew didn't suit them. Yet she saw the regret in Hisagi's eyes, a regret that was overshadowed by his deep anger toward the 3rd Division captain. It was a regret that was going to haunt him in the morning.
"You're going to regret this," Matsumoto tried to explain. "You're going to hate yourself after all of this is done. I've seen what regret looks like, I've seen more than you think that I have, boy. I've seen how sensitive you truly are. You won't able to live with yourself and you're going to try to commit suicide again."
She thought back to the moment where he ran into open fire and wound up with Suzumushi through his chest. He wanted to do that all along, to end his life and not have to live in a world where everything was going so sour. She saw the start of that again as he was put into a position of power as his best friend started to get jealous of everything that he had accomplished and possessed. He was starting to fall into the same pit that had threatened to take him over before. He was falling faster than he could catch himself.
"Shuuhei, I'm begging you. Don't do anything that you're going to regret," Matsumoto closed her eyes as she watched him turn to her, her eyes falling onto the scar on his chest. "Please… Shuuhei, don't do this…"
"Rangiku-san," he sighed as his hands trembled against the desk. "You don't know what's going through my mind. I want to destroy him, murder him, cause all of the pain that he's caused to me…"
"He's done nothing!" Matsumoto yelled as she walked toward him. "He tried to strangle you. I don't think that merits anything along the lines of destroying his life. You are being rash…"
"Am I? Am I being rash? He's going around the whole Society spreading these lies. He's calling me a whore, Rangiku-san! A whore? Me!" he shook his head. "If he wasn't spending so much time riding Ukitake-soutaichou's dick maybe he'd be able to see what's happening. He's trying to slander my name then so be it. I will attack him in a way worse than his name. I will attack his livelihood."
"Don't do this…" Matsumoto breathed, closing her eyes. "He'll kill you!"
"Let him!" Hisagi hissed as he turned away from her. "Let him kill me, then you can talk to him about regret!"
He walked toward the door as Hitsugaya walked in, not even saying goodbye to Matsumoto. She looked at the door as tears started to form in her eyes. Hisagi wasn't stable. He wasn't like them man that she thought he was. Once he started drinking again, he had turned into a completely different man, he had become more deatched from the world, he had thrown himself into a pit where he knew no one would try to go after him. Now she was the one who had to try and save him. She had to stop Kira from making this any worse.
"Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya asked as he looked at her. "What was that all about?"
She closed her eyes as the scar on Hisagi's chest came back to her mind. "Nothing, taichou…" she breathed as she shook her head, thinking of the blood and the despair of that suicidal night. "Nothing at all…"
0o0o0o0o0o0
Kira ran through the door to the 5th Division. "Where the hell is Hinamori?" his voice was full of toxic venom that made everyone freeze as they looked at him.
"What do you mean?" Kiyone asked as she looked at the captain. "What do you want to see her for?"
Kira closed his eyes tightly as he thought about Hisagi's hands all over Hinamori's body, as he thought of those lips on hers. It made him sick to his stomach. The moment that Hisagi left the 3rd Division, he knew that it was a race, and if he put Hinamori on his side before Hisagi could get to her than he knew that there was no way he could lose this race.
"Where is she?" he asked again.
Kira could see it in Kiyone's eyes; the lieutenant thought that Kira was going to hit her captain. She thought that Hinamori was in danger of abuse if she told her where she was. He closed his eyes at that thought, was there a chance that he was going to hit her? Was he that upset at Hinamori for all of this? Deep in his heart, he knew that it had to be Hinamori's fault, but as he remembered the friendship that he and Hisagi had allegedly shared all he could do was place the blame on him. He closed his eyes as he mustered the strength to ask again.
"Where is she?" he asked.
"She's out."
"Tell me where she is!" Kira urged, but Kiyone would not budge.
"Why is it important?"
Kira closed his eyes tightly as he thought about Hisagi getting closer. "Have you seen Hisagi-taichou?" he asked, choking on that name.
"He was on his way to the 10th Division," Kiyone answered, watching a smile roll across Kira's face.
She's not at the 10th Division and he's not at the 9th so she must still be training. I'll get there before he does! He ran to the door, not even saying than you to Kiyone. He had no time. His actions out side the 3rd Division were rash, and recently Hisagi's thought process was a little less advanced than it used to be. It could only end in tears.
This was a war now, a war that they could have easily prevented if they controlled their idiocy. Kira closed his eyes as he moved closer to where Hinamori was training fearing that this was no longer for the love of Hinamori. He moved faster as he wondered if his friendship with Hisagi was worth this, if he was able to give up all of the decades of happiness for something that was so small, so insignificant. He threw those thoughts aside as he realized it was.
0o0o0o0o0o0
Iba ran into the 13th Division to see Renji on the ground with a bottle of sake. "Rukia's gone with Ukitake-soutaichou. They both left for the 1st Division together."
Renji looked up at the lieutenant as he nearly dropped his bottle of liquor. Thoughts raced through his mind as he thought of the last couple of days. All of the accusations flooded back into his mind as he realized that it was likely that there was aonther man. He closed his eyes tightly as he felt a storm of emotion rise throughout his body as he heard those words.
"What were they doing when you saw them?" he asked, demanding answers.
"They were embracing and then they went to the 1st Division," Iba shook his head. "He was her former captain after all… maybe there was a chance that she had feelings for him."
"No, Kira had feelings for Ichimaru, Hinamori had feelings for Aizen, Rukia did and does not have feelings for Ukitake-soutaichou!" he shook his head as he wrapped his hand tighter around the bottle of sake. "I don't want to hear it. I don't want to believe it."
"Was she a virgin when you first had her?" Iba asked.
"Kind of a personal question isn't it?" Renji asked as he closed his eyes tighter. "Yes, she was…" he fought the burning sensation of tears coming to his eyes as he thought back to that moment, they were happy, they were truly happy.
"Abarai…" Iba continued. "I know that this is difficult, but I think she might be having an affair with Ukitake-soutaichou. I think that she's grown bored of you."
"I'm her fiancé, you don't grow bored of you fiancé!" he shook his head as he thought about what was going on. "Why?"
"I think you should ask your fiancée that question," Iba breathed as he saw the anger that was inside of Renji. "Abarai…"
"Leave me…" Renji whispered.
"Abarai…"
"Leave me!"
Iba obeyed the command and walked out of the room, but the moment the door closed, the bottle of sake slammed into the wall shattering into pieces as a cry of anguish passed Renji's lips. Papers off of the desk fell to the ground as he kept crying out in heartache, everyone outside of the office going silent. He then slammed his back to the door and started to shudder as he felt a crawling sensation rolling through his skin. He had been betrayed by someone that he loved the most.
He remained on the ground as the tear that had been haunting him earlier fell from his eye, going down his cheek, burning him like an open flame. There was no hope for him and Rukia as a pair anymore. They were divided. He had nowhere to turn. He was destroyed.
0o0o0o0o0o0
Hinamori held onto Tobiume tighter as she was about to swing it again. Her life had been harder than she wanted it to be. Hisagi finally started to warm up to her, finally told her that he was willing to take their forbidden relationship to the next level. She remembered what his body felt like against hers, something that washed away all of the anger that Kira had once caused her.
She knew that Kira's heart had changed, there was no longer any love in his eyes, there was no love in her touch, every kiss didn't seem sincere, everything that she had felt with him didn't feel like he cared about her any longer, this had turned into a game. Yet it was a game that she no longer wanted to play in, it was a game that she knew that would only end in tears, something that Kira deserved.
As she tried to focus on Tobiume, she heard footstep come closer to her. As her eyes moved to glance at who it was her, her heart started to sink deep within her chest, there before her was her so called "lover" with a sour look on his face.
"What are you doing all the way out here?" Hinamori asked as she almost dropped Tobiume.
"I confronted Hisagi today," Kira announced.
"What did you do to him?" she asked. "Did you hurt him?"
"Why is the important?" he asked her back. "You shouldn't care so much about Hisagi, you should care about me. I told him that he should stay away from you; we're trying to make this work out between us. I want to make this work."
"Izuru…" she breathed. "I don't see a future for us…" she shook her head. "I don't see you ever putting me above your work."
She thought back to what Hisagi said, he wasn't going to touch her until she let Kira go. And as she looked ay Kira, she saw a friend, nothing more than a friend. Yet now when she looked into his eyes, she saw a small amount of forced pain within them overshadowed by his confusion. He knew everything; he knew that she was in love with Hisagi. He knew that's why they were over.
"Are you breaking up with me?" Kira asked.
"I think we'd be better off as friends, don't you?" she asked as she looked into his eyes. "I want you to know that I will always care for you, I love you like a brother, Kira Izuru, I don't love you like a lover."
He shook his head as he looked at her. "I don't want this to happen…"
"I want you to tell me one thing. Are you in love with me? Or do you want Hisagi-san?" she asked, seeing his eyes light up. "Are you attracted to Hisagi-san?"
"Are you accusing me of being a homosexual?" Kira asked as he looked at her straight in the eyes. "Hinamori-kun…" it had been a while since he had called her that, her heart starting to warm as she heard those words. "I must be disgusting for you to even think that!"
"So you are," she breathed, a condescending smile on her face. "I always knew Kira-kun, from the first day that I met you; I thought that you were a homosexual. The way you looked at Abarai-kun, Hisagi-san, Ichimaru, even Ukitake-soutaichou. Kira-kun… don't stay with me if you aren't happy."
"I want to be happy with you."
"You want to appear to be normal."
"I want for once in my life to be looked at as someone to be admired, I don't want to be poor little Izuru-chan anymore. I want to have something of my own. I want to be someone's Abarai-kun," he shook his head. "Why do you want to be with him so?"
"Are you going to attack him again?" Hinamori asked as she moved further from him, rolling her eyes. "Because if that's your plan then you can go screw yourself because you're not going to get anything out of me."
"There's nothing you can say that will make me leave you," he breathed as he looked into her eyes.
"How about this?" she closed her eyes tightly. "I love him more than anything…"
"I see," he shook his head as he walked away from her. "Don't come by the 3rd Division today, I can't stand to look at you and tell that harlot of yours to obey the same rules." he then started to walk away from her. "We'll discuss this more tomorrow."
As he walked away, Hinamori closed her eyes tightly. She missed the Kira Izuru that she once knew. She missed the shy Kira who would never attack anyone. But she knew much like Renji and Hisagi, the duties of being a captain had taken them over, they were no longer thinking straight.
She grasped Tobiume again as she thought about all that was occurring in this world, she knew that there was no longer anyway for her to have what she wanted, not while Kira was like this. So with her own hands she was going to knock some sense back into Kira, no matter how much it would hurt.
0o0o0o0o0o0
Rukia walked back into the 13th Division only to see glass all over the office and alcohol soaked papers. She walked deeper into the office, her heart racing as she wondered what could have happened in there. She then saw her fiancé lying on the floor in the corner, his eyes swollen as his body was soaked with sake, his red hair adhering to his face as he looked at her with sad rust colored eyes.
"Where have you been?" he asked.
She looked at what he had become trying to fight the tears that were coming to her own eyes as she saw him shudder a little. "I was just doing some work."
"I didn't assign you any…" Renji whispered coldly. "I'm your captain; I know when you have work and when you don't. And I should always be informed of you going to other divisions to help them with their own tasks."
"I'm sorry that I forgot to tell you," she saw the look in his eyes; they resembled Kira's whenever he looked at Hinamori. Renji's heart was dying right in front of her, the heart that she had loved so fiercely for years.
This situation had taken her unbreakable fiancé and had thrown him, to the floor with bits of glass and sake drenched papers. She walked closer to him as she knew this was her fault. She wasn't worthy enough for him, and every step that she took toward him, her heart was breaking too. She loved him so much, loved him more than she loved her life, now as she looked at her broken fiancée she knew that it was never going to be the same. They were only going to break each other as this went deeper. They were falling apart.
"Come here," he breathed as he lifted his arm from the ground, reaching to her.
As she moved to him, he grasped her into a deep embrace, the first tear finally falling down her cheek. She returned his embrace as she felt his lips hit her cheek. Every moment as she lay in his embrace, she felt his body start to die, his soul crying for its life. She closed her eyes tighter as she fell limp in his embrace, feeling his breathing start to speed up.
"I love you, Rukia…" he whispered as he held onto her. "I love you…"
She closed her eyes as she tried to say it back. She couldn't nothing that she could say could allow her to say it back. Even after the hours of crying in the 1st Division as Ukitake, she couldn't look at Renji even after that. As his arms tightened around her, she couldn't say it back, hearing the pain in his voice as he said it one last time.
"I love you…" he said.
She closed her eyes as she heard those words, she tried and tried but she couldn't say anything to him. There was nothing there for her to say to him.
This chapter, last chapter, and next chapter are all supposed to happen in the course of one day. The next chapter will be the first chapter without any Renji/Rukia problem. But there are going to be two major things that happen in the next chapter that have been expected to happen since Falling Petals. There is also going to be more Ikkaku/Yumichika. Look forward to that.
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