The past week had been hard. She was awoken each night with a nightmare. After which Aaron always climbed into bed and held her allowing her to sleep the rest of the night Nightmare free. The team had been into see her each day. She learned that Garcia and JJ were each having their share of memories, although they didn't come nightly like Emily's. Their nightmares were about watching Emily get hurt and of the team being too late to save Emily, while Emily's nightmares had simply made her relive each agonizing minute.
Emily was waiting for her discharge papers to be completed. Hotch was meeting her at the front door of the hospital.
The nurse walked in, "Ready to go?"
Emily looked up and smiled as she saw her and a wheelchair pushing orderly enter the room. "Let's get out of here," she replied. The orderly helped her get out of bed and into the wheelchair. Her chest was still a little saw from the beatings she took. They made their way into the hallway and started their journey to the hospital exit.
"I take it Agent Hotchner went to get the car?"
"Yes, he went down just before you came into the room."
They exited the hospital and Emily smiled as she saw Hotch waiting for her. The orderly helped Emily to get into the car. The nurse handed some medication to Hotch. "Emily, you should make an appointment with your doctor sometime next week," advised the nurse.
"I will, thank you," Emily responded.
Hotch pulled out of the parking lot and started the drive to Emily's parents' house. "Your mother wanted to have a big dinner party to celebrate you coming out of the hospital."
"Oh Aaron, I'm not up to . . ." she started to complain but he interrupted her.
"I know that is why I was successful in convincing her to it just being the team hanging out in her backyard."
"And she agreed?"
Hotch nodded. "Yes. I was able to convince her, with your father's help, that you were not fully recovered yet. I can't say that it will stop her from having one in the future, but at least it won't be anytime soon."
"You are the best. I love you, Aaron Hotchner."
"Love you too," he responded as he reached over and took her hand in his. "What's the matter?" he asked noticing the gleam in her eyes changing.
"I need your help with something."
"Is everything, okay? I can turn around if you need to go back . . ."
"No, Aaron I'm fine."
"Well, then what's wrong?"
"I need your help in getting some time alone with JJ and Pen today. We have not been alone since everything happened. I just need to see for myself that everything is okay with them, and I need for them to see that I am going to be fine."
"Okay, you just let me know and I'll make it happen.""We're here," he announced as he pulled into the Ambassador's driveway. Putting the car in park he leaned over and gave Emily a kiss. "I'll be right around to help you into the house."
She nodded as she watched him exit the car and move around to her side. He opened her door and put his hand out for Emily to hold onto as she exited the car. "You okay to walk to the house?"
She nodded at his question, "I'm fine."
"Okay I'll get your bag and will be right behind you."
As they neared the house, the front door opened and Emily's father came out to greet them. "Hi daddy," Emily said with a grin.
He gave her a gentle hug and shook Aaron's hand. "Let's get you inside. How are you feeling today?"
"I'm glad to be out of that hospital." Her dad just smiled and let a giggle out as he opened the front door and walked Emily inside.
Emily could hear the laughter of her friends coming from the living room. Hotch took her hand in his and walked by her side as she slowly made her way into the room.
"Emily!" said her mother as she noticed her daughter walk in the room. "It's good to see you out of that hospital."
"I can't tell you how glad I am to be out," Emily responded as her mother gave her a hug. "Hey guys," said Emily as she smiled to her co-workers.
"It's good to see you walking about," replied Morgan.
"Morgan, did you really think I was going to let a few light taps on my chest keep down for long?" Emily responded sarcastically. "Seriously, though, I am going to be fine. It still hurts to breath sometimes, but other than that no lasting effects. Now, I have been looking forward to finally getting a non-hospital meal so how much longer do I have to wait, Mother?"
Elizabeth laughed at her daughter's request. "It shouldn't be too much longer. Let me go and check."
"Thank you," said Emily as she turned her attention to Hotch and with her eyes, she informed him that the time had come for her to get some time alone with JJ and Garcia.
He nodded in understanding as he spoke, "Hey guys why don't you come outside and help me with Emily's things."
"Sure, man" replied Morgan as he stood along with Reid and Rossi."
Sensing the need to be alone for a little alone time with her girlfriends, Emily's father excused himself as he went to help his wife. Emily cautiously made her way to sit on the edge of the table in front of the couch that her two friends were sitting on. "Are you two, okay?" she asked them. "And I am not talking about physically. We went through a horrible experience. I know it must have been hard for you to witness everything that went on, all the torture that I received. Lord knows, it was hard for me to see you being shocked and to see the looks on your faces and hear your cries begging him to stop."
After a few quiet seconds JJ spoke, "It was hard and part of me felt responsible."
"JJ, this was not your fau . . ."
"No, Emily, let me finish. If I didn't tell Garcia to make sure that Hotch got that file than none of this would have happened. You wouldn't have been shocked to the point that you almost died or nearly getting your heart ripped out of your chest by a hammer and metal stake," JJ argued as tears streamed down her face.
"Jayje, listen to me," said Emily as she took her friends hand in hers. "NONE of this is your fault. You did not know that Brad and his brothers would do this. There are several pluses that came from Garcia giving that file to Hotch as well." Seeing JJ's confusing look Emily continued. "If I had not have shown up when I did, it is possible that more woman would have been kidnapped and suffered that horrible death. Hotch and I would never have recognized our feelings for each other and wouldn't be as happy as we are today, because I would no longer be with the Bureau. I would have succeeding on taking that foreign services exam and most likely be somewhere oversees in the Middle East by now. We would not have been the close friends that we are now."
"She is right JJ," Garcia agreed. "I was feeling guilty as well. You just beat me to it, expressing your feelings before me. I'm the one that blocked the requests for Emily and Hotch. If it wasn't for that than Hotch would have already been in White-Collar Crimes and Emily would have been gone."
"No regrets, okay?" said Emily as she looked at her two friends. "I am going to recover fully from this. It will take some time, but I will heal. We will be able to have are our girl's nights out and messing with guys like Brad the Real FBI Agent." JJ and Garcia both let a small snicker out as they remembered that night.
"Kicking criminal ass!" said JJ with a smile.
"I knew that the guys would stop at nothing to find us. Come one they even got Gideon and Elle to help out. But, it was the two of you that kept me fighting and kept me alive. I knew that at any time I could have ended all the pain I was experiencing by telling them what they wanted to hear."
"They would have killed you, Em," said JJ.
"And then the two of you," added Emily nodding. "That's the main reason why I didn't give in and tell them what they wanted to hear. So you see I have the two of you to thank for keeping me alive, not to blame for what happened to me."
JJ let out a deep sigh as she finally accepted that she was not responsible for the events that took place a week ago. "So, I guess Reid talked to you about how I was feeling, huh?"
"No," replied Emily. "I figured it out on my own. I have been waiting for a chance when we would be alone to talk with the two of you, but that never happened in the hospital, so I asked Aaron to help me get the guys away so that I talk with you today."
"Have I ever told you that I hate profilers," said Garcia with a smile on her face.
"Well I hate to break this to you, Pen, but you are surrounded by them," responded Emily as they laughed and she grimaced from the pain in her chest that the much needed laugh caused. "Ouch."
"You okay?" asked JJ.
While the ladies had their heart-to-heart inside the house, Hotch, Morgan, Rossi and Reid journeyed out to Hotch's car to remove Emily's luggage.
"Two bags?" questioned Morgan.
"Emily wanted some time to speak with JJ and Garcia," Hotch explained. "She is worried about them and wants to make sure that they are okay."
"Does she feel responsible?" asked Rossi.
"I think it's more of a feeling to protect them," noticed Reid. "She is older than them and it is not uncommon in a group or friends or coworkers for the oldest woman to take one the mothering role."
"That makes sense," says Morgan.
"I have not had the chance to speak with them alone either," said Hotch. "How are they really?"
"They are both feeling some guilt that Emily was hurt more then they were, but I think it has affected JJ more than she is letting on," answered Rossi.
"With any luck, it will all be straightened out today," said Reid as they all noticed a car pull into the driveway.
"The gang's all here," said Morgan as he recognized Gideon in the driver's seat and Elle sitting next to him in the passenger's seat. They walked towards the car as Gideon pulled into a spot he and Elle exited the vehicle.
"What's everyone doing outside?" asked Gideon.
"Emily wanted to speak with JJ and Garcia, so we are giving them some privacy," explained Hotch.
Gideon nodded, "They are blaming themselves for Emily's pain."
"When I was sitting with them after they were moved up to their hospital room, JJ kept mumbling in her sleep that it was her fault and she kept saying 'I'm sorry, it's all my fault'," Elle offered as an explanation.
"Did you ask her about it?" asked Rossi.
"I did and she said that it was nothing and that she didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to push her to talk. I knew that she was aware that we were all here for her when she was ready."
"If she was talking about recent events, why would she think it was her fault?" asked Gideon.
Hotch let out a deep sigh. "Why didn't I see this before?"
"See what?" asked Elle.
"The day we accepted the Joseph Smith case, Emily resigned from the FBI and I put in my papers to transfer to White Collar Crimes. I was trying to save my marriage," explained Hotch.
"And Emily?" asked Rossi.
"She realized that the main reason that Strauss put her in the BAU was to spy on the team and get ammunition against me to have me fired."
"So she quit instead," added Morgan shaking his head. "I never knew."
"We made a deal with Strauss," explained Hotch. "We wouldn't make her treatment of Emily public and she would withdraw my transfer and Em's resignation and stop coming after me."
"How does JJ fit into all of that?" asked Reid.
"JJ gave the case file to Garcia with instructions to give it to Hotch once Strauss left his office," said Morgan as he began to understand what JJ might have felt guilty about.
"So JJ thinks that if she didn't leave the file, than Emily would have never joined in on the case," said Gideon.
"It is not safe to play 'What if?' games in this line of work," argued Rossi.
The group nodded their agreement with his statement. They all knew that it was true, but they were also human and it was hard for any of them to not think of the "What if?" situations. "Let's get inside," said Hotch. "I think that they are probably finished with their talk and I know that they will all be happy to see the two of you again." He motioned to Elle and Gideon as he spoke. Hotch picked up one of Emily's bags and Morgan took the other. As they walked back into the house, they could hear the ladies' conversations
The group looked at each other as they heard Garcia say, "Have I ever told you that I hate profilers." Hotch wondered if they may have returned too soon, until he heard Emily reply, "Well I hate to break this to you, Pen, but you are surrounded by them." He heard Emily wince, "Ouch," from the pain and quickly went into the room with the others behind him.
"You okay?" asked JJ.
"Em?" asked Hotch walking up to her.
"I'm fine. I just laughed a little too hard." She looked at JJ, "Jayje, really, I'm okay." JJ nodded her head. "I see you found more than my bags when you were outside," Emily smiled at Gideon and Elle.
"I'm sure you're glad to be out of that hospital," said Elle.
"Glad is an understatement," said Emily as Hotch took his hand in hers.
Emily's father walked into the room. "Ah, it seems that everyone is here." He walked over and greeted Elle and Gideon. "Let's go outside to the back patio. Dinner is almost ready."
"You guys go ahead. I'll be right out," said Emily as she left the room and went up the stairs.
"I am going to bring the bags up to her room. I want to make sure that she is not in any pain," said Hotch. "We'll be right out."
"Aaron, it's the last door on the right."
Hotch nodded to Allen and continued his way up the stairs, while everyone else journeyed outside. He walked into Emily's room and felt a slight tightness in his chest when he found Emily in tears on her bed. "Hey, you alright?" asked Hotch.
Emily looked up at him, tears running down her cheeks. "She blamed herself for everything that happened."
"JJ?" he asked. Emily nodded. "Did you tell he it wasn't her fault?"
"I did and Pen did also, and after a little convincing, she finally realized that we were right. A week, Aaron, she went the whole week believing that. Why didn't she talk with anyone? Why didn't she come and talk with me?"
Hotch sat down next to Emily and placed his arms around her. "I don't know, Em, but you know about it now and we will all help each other through this."
"I don't regret any of it. I could have dealt without everything that happened last week, but I don't regret letting you talk me into going with you to Milwaukee, and I don't regret going into that house."
"I know you don't, Hon. Why don't you go and wash your face and we'll go down and join the barbecue."
"That sounds good." Emily got up from the bed and gave Hotch a kiss before she went into the bathroom to wash her tear stained cheeks. "Thank you for being here for me. I love you."
"I love you too." Hotch watched Emily walk into the bathroom. He stood up and placed the two bags of luggage onto the bed and started to unpack them. A few minutes later the bathroom door opened and Emily stepped out. "Ready?"
Emily nodded and they made their way downstairs and out to the patio to join their friends.