A/N:Sorry I have been slow with getting this chapter up, I am just a bit busy right now, so don't mind me!
Disclaimer:I was talking to Stephenie Meyer the other night, and she said people with the nic name of Dee who have pink iPods are not aloud to own Twilight. Thanks a lot Stephenie Meyer, way to make a person feel loved.
Bella POV:
With Alice going crazy like this I think a human like me should be really afraid at the moment. I have never seen her go this loony tunes over something as simple as shopping! All of the other Cullen's and I sat in the living room waiting for the first 'attack', god knows what she could do.
"What do you think she is going to do?"I ask
"Knowing Alice, only she and some higher power know."said Emmett.
"Well that was helpful..."
"I won't let her hurt you,Bella."assured Edward
"I'm not afraid of getting hurt, I'm afraid of having to go shopping."
"Honestly, it's not that bad."snorts Rosalie
I glare at her "That's what you think."
"No, that's what any other normal girl thinks."
"Define the terms normal."I shoot back.
"Girls."warned Carlisle
"Sorry."we both mumble.
"Awe, it was just starting to get entertaining."whined Emmett.
"EMMETT!"everyone yelled
"Well sorry for telling the truth."he huffed.
We all sit in silence for a while trying to think of anything that Alice might do, but seeing as we are not the crazy pixie that could be hard. I mean she could do ANYTHING, this is Alice we are talking about here! Ugh, I just don't want to go shopping though, anything but shopping!
"Knowing Alice it is going to be something that might threaten yours and Edward's social status."said Jasper
"Oh, well that's just lovely!"I groaned
"Can't be that bad."said Emmett.
"Come on, this is Alice we are talking about."
"True."
"Well she is getting closer to the house and she is thinking the Chinese Alphabet."said Edward
"That can't be good."
"No, not normally."
Alice POV:
I am so smart, I have the greatest idea and now Bella will be sure to come shopping with me for the next YEAR! Oh the fun I could have with that, Bella Barbie galore...and NO ONE can stop me! Never ever, not even Edward Freaking I Own A Stupid Shiny Volvo And I'm So Freaking Hot And Awesome Cullen! Alice you are such a genius!
I drive home from the store and run into the house and everyone is staring at me like I'm going to do something stupid, well I kind of am so I guess there is no problem with that. I pull out a DVD (that is blank) from my coat pocket and run around screaming and singing;
"I GOT BLACKMAIL! I GOT BLACKMAIL !I GOT BLACKMAIL!
"That blackmail would be...?"asked Carlisle.
"I HAVE A DVD THAT I RECORDED OF EDWARD AND BELLA HAVING SEX! ON THE CARPET!"
"Alice, we have hard wood floors."said Esme
"...And Edward and I never had sex before."said Bella.
"SHIT!"I yelled.
"Alice Cullen! Don't you dare use that language in this house."scolded Esme
"My evil plan FAILED! Now I will never take over the world while you are all sleeping tonight."
"We don't sleep, Alice."said Jasper
"IT COULD HAPPEN!"
"I thought you only wanted to take Bella shopping, not take over the world..."said Carlisle
"Why must you guys always find every fault in my plan!"
"Do you even have a plan, Alice?"asked Edward
"If I did I would not tell you."I said
"Someone think she should go back to the asylum?"asked Bella
"NO! NOT THE ASYLUM!"
"Alice, stop screaming."said Rosalie "Most of us are Vampires with super hearing."
"Fine! Now if you don't mind I have to go...the FBI is coming for me."
I run our of the room as soon as possible, I need a new plan...
Bella POV:
"The FBI?"I ask
"I really don't want to know."said Edward
"Yea, me neither."
"So you two still hold the V-Card?"teases Emmett.
"EMMETT!"Edward and I yell
"What, it's funny! An over 100 year old vampire and a human girl who never kissed a boy until she met him, still have the V-Card."
"That 'stuff' is for after marriage."said Edward
"Ha, forget marriage! I'd just do it on the couch without caring."
"Emmett, that is disgusting."I say
"What, Rosalie and I do it all the time."
"EMMETT!"we all yell
"I did not need to know that."I said "Bad images in my head...very bad images..."
"So what do you think Alice will try next?"asked Carlisle
"Who knows.."sighed Esme
"If there is a God...now would be a good time for him to come and save me."I mumble
"Don't worry, it's only Alice."said Edward
Yea right Edward...only Alice, just with those words I can think of one thousand things that could go wrong!
A/N: Wow, Alice is a very desperate person...haha I was laughing the whole time I was writing this...Gold, pure gold :P
So review to tell me what you think, I'll try and update again next weekend!