Bob grinned, bowing at Tom's feet. "You called me, my lord?"

"Yes," Tom paused, eyeing him. "Bob. I did call you. Lucius and I got into a fight and I'm in desperate need of a blowjob."

Bob shrugged. "Okay."

Fido spread his legs slowly, eyeing Bob, and Bob kneeled, blinking, placing his hands on the inside of the Dark Lord's thighs. His hands quickly opened the Dark Lord's thighs and removed Henry's cock from the confines of his pants. Archibald gasped, muttering under his breath.

Bob slowly, placed his lips around the head of Fido's erection, sucking the tip hard. Henry nearly cried out, gripping his throne. Bob removed his mouth, blowing on the Dark Lord's length.

He dragged his tongue along the underside of Voldemort's erection, the seated man whimpering.

"I said blowjob, not teasing session," Voldemort hissed. Bob smiled, entirely unapologetically, and engulfed the entirety of Tom's hard on in his mouth. Tom gurgled, grabbing at Bob's head to lead his motions.

"Better," he hissed through tight lips, fingers gripping tighter as Bob sucked in his cheeks, causing Henry to groan. "God, I love this job."

Fred poked George. "Get up; Zephod's come back for a visit."

George grinned. "Did he try the 'I'm from space' line?"

Fred grinned back. "Naturally. I told him he may have gotten you pregnant and then he remembered us."

George laughed. "Naturally."

From the door, Zephod blinked. "Sex?"

Draco laid on his bed, naked because none of his clothes fit anymore, when the window flew open, Jacques the vampire flying in after the showers of broken glass. Draco screeched and threw a throw pillow at Jacques, who ducked, and watched the pillow fly out the window, and land in front of a bus, which swerved, and hit a pigeon, which promptly spontaneously combusted.

"I need to talk to you." Jacques said calmly.

"Who the bloody hell are you?" Draco spat, too startled to cover himself.

"Jacques, I believe we met a while ago."

"Oh, right, I remember." Draco sighed, "What's shakin' bacon?"

"Nothing but the butter." Jacques answered causing a quizzical look to be drawn across Draco's face.

Yero glared at his stomach. "Get born all ready," he hissed at it.

Fabala walked in. "Hello, Yero," it said with a smile. It did a double take. "Why aren't you wearing any clothes?"

Henry looked at Fido, spooned next to him. "You know, if we had our own bodies, I think I might decide to be in love with you."

Fido moaned in his sleep, snuggling back into Henry's arms.

"Good night, Fido." he whispered, closing his eyes.

"Night," Fido whispered back, once he was sure that Henry was good and sleeping.

"Hey Voldemort, why don't I ever get laid?" Archibald asked, calmly sipping a cup of coffee.

"Because you're boring."

"Well you look like a snake."

"I am part snake."

"And people find that hot?"

"Apparently."

"Hey Voldie?"

"What?"

"Can I be part snake, too?"

"No."

"You've got to be joking." Draco stared at Jacques.

"Nope, I'm sorry."

"You've really got to be kidding me."

"No, it's true."

"I can't believe it."

"I couldn't either."

"They're really discontinuing Twinkies?"

"Yeah," Jacques sighed, "something about them causing schizophrenia in people named Tom."

Tom slowly ate a Twinkie, now that he had saved up enough points for it.

"Hi!" A small boy sitting cross legged waved, "I'm Bunny, will you be my friend?"

"Damn," Tom swore, "Not another one."

Archibald grinned. "So, Bunny, what are your opinions on toothpaste?"

Bunny shuddered.

Archibald nearly jumped. "Wanna have sex?"

Bunny nodded emphatically. "Sure!"

Fred looked at George.

George looked at Fred.

"You mean-?"

"I think so. So then-?"

"Naturally. Which means-"

"Oh obviously. Do you think we can-?"

"Unlikely. Well, Fred, it's been nice knowing you."

"You too, George. You, too."

They straightened up and knocked on the door. "Hi mum," they muttered sheepishly.

Bunny ran about the room, angrily clutching a piece of paper, his eyes clenched tightly shut, surprising he only ran into the bookshelf three times. Tom, Henry, Fido, Archibald, and Voldemort sat in chairs sipping tea as the new voice ran around them.

"Who stole my purple crayon?" Bunny demanded for the four hundred and thirty second time, "I can't draw my purple orca without my purple crayon and it's missing!"

"Look over there Bunny," Tom pointed, "a clever distraction!"

"Your little mind games wont work on—Ooooh! It's shiny!"

"This is why I don't go out in the sun." Yero whined, looking at his legs, "I get all purple and peely."

Bunny smiled, drawing in big loops. "Pika pika pika pika!" he shouted, his eyes glinting.

Henry grinned. "Yes, you are right, Bunny. It is quite shiny."

Fido blinked. "I think we should add a disclaimer for Gravitation at this point."

Henry smiled and nodded.

Dumbledore was shunned by the other ducks. He tried to quack again. "Honk!" suddenly a very pretty swan named Penny showed up and asked him for some help. He grinned. He was a happy duck again.

Lucius picked up his cat from where the duck dropped it and started to stroke it softly, and he began to mindlessly nibble on its ear. And upon realizing that he was in fact, nibbling on the ear of a dead cat, he threw it into the next room.

"Lucius!" Tom called.

"Tom," called Voldemort. "We have decided that you need to learn to use more magic, regularly."

Tom sighed. "Why do I get the feeling this is going to end in song?"

Voldemort smiled, and began singing, "Impossible, for a plain yellow pumpkin to become a gold carriage

Impossible, for a plain country bumpkin and a prince to join in marriage

And four white mice will never be four white horses

Such fol de rol and fiddly dee of course is—"

Henry joined in. "Impossible

But the world is full of zanies and fools

Who don't believe in sensible rules

And won't believe what sensible people say

And because these daft and dewy eyed dopes

Keep building up in possible hopes—"

Archibald joined the other two with, "Impossible things are happening every day!"

Voldemort grinned, "Impossible,"

Henry sang again, "Impossible,"

Archibald grinned, "Impossible,"

Bunny grinned manically and joined in, surprisingly well, "Impossible,"

Fido grinned in a similar manner to Bunny, "Impossible,"

All five together, "Impossible!"

Tom nearly started crying.

Bunny was just plain scary as he sang, "It's possible, for a plain yellow pumpkin to become a golden carriage,

It's possible for a plain country bumpkin and a prince to join in marriage

And four white mice are easily turned to horses

Such fol de rol and fiddly dee of course is,

Quite possible!"

Fido was lying down lazily, obviously enjoying Tom's pain as he belted, "For the world is full of zanies and fools

Who don't believe in sensible rules

And won't believe what sensible people say

And because these daft and dewy eyed dopes

Keep building up in possible hopes

Impossible things are happening every day!"

Voldemort was trying to not laugh. "It's possible!"

Henry was also badly hiding chuckles. "It's possible!"

Archibald had adopted Bunny's grin. "It's possible!"

Bunny was now twitching. "It's possible!"

Fido was pointing at Bunny and laughing, making his words very hard to understand! "It's possible!"

Tom glared, and muttered, "It's fucking possible."

The five grinned wildly and belted as loud (and consequently as bad) as they could. "It's possible!"