Sorry about the hold up, (if any of you were reading this). My internet was having technical difficulties (glares at internet box). Also, the reason why I posted this story was to express how I feel about how Ash always loses an official tournament (not counting the Orange Islands). I'm willing to accept opinions from anyone on how they feel about this fic. I also recommend Ash/May fans to not read this fic. (You probably noticed in the first chapter, my bad.) Anyways on with Chapter 2!
Disclaimer: Again I own nothing of Pokemon.
Ash busily loaded his beloved rifle intending on using it on whoever dared piss him off. As he was about to go through the door, his mother (Delia) sighed seeing the rifle, "Sweetie, must you always use the extreme method of dealing with your problems?" Ash grumbled, "Fine." Throws down the rifle and pulled out a pistol. He turned to her, "Better?"
Delia sighed again "That's not what I …………" She was interrupted by a pathetic whimpering. Both of them looked down at a pitiful sight. Pikachu, Ash's first Pokemon, was lying facedown on the floor, cigarette buds scattered all around it. "DAMNIT PIKACHU! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU! STOP LEAVING YOUR SHIT ON THE FLOOR!" Ash screamed. Pikachu looked up and just gave its trainer a pitiful look. Delia was more worried about the state it was in, "What happened to it?" Ash snorted, "Mom, welcome to main character life," he continued looking down at his broken spirited friend, "Those damn episode writers are always coming up with bullshit, and what importance are we? THE DUMBASSES THAT KEEP GOING ALONG WITH IT!
Delia jumped at his sudden outburst. Nowadays she was usually use to his behavior. She was caught off guard that time. Ash continued his 'Ass Rant' "It can't take this business anymore Mom! I can't take anymore of this! ARE THERE ANY VIEWERS WHO AT LEAST NOTICE THE PATTERN IN THE SERIES! Delia decided to walk out on this one "Fine honey, just calm down," she looked down at Pikachu again, "Since you're going out, I think you should take it so it could get fresh air, I don't think it had any in a while…." Ash grabbed a leash, fastened it on Pikachu, and began heading out. He began dragging the electric mouse out the door, while it was still laying facedown on the ground. Delia cringed at the sight before her, "Uh, honey………., make sure it isn't dead………." "Its fine," Ash retorted as he left.
Ash continued dragging his friend down the road through Pallet Town, journeying toward the building of his 'Superiors', which was still a couple of miles away. The only time Pikachu lifted its head up was when he spotted a Marlboro sign at a nearby shop. Ash was wandering of what kind shit he was in for, until he heard………….."Ashy! Ashykins!" Ash thought his heart stopped. For that moment he wanted to drop dead right there and then when he heard it calling out to him. He turned around only to wish he hadn't. May Idontknowwhatthehellherlastnameis was running towards him at high speed with that even god murdering smile. Ash fumbled into his pocket for his pistol, pulled it out and pointed it at her. She came to an abrupt halt right in front of him, standing right on top of Pikachu. The poor thing was too depressed to notice. "Ashy sweetheart, I was looking all over for you!" she said with that voice so shrill Ash nearly pulled the trigger. "You have 5 seconds to get the hell away from me," Ash calmly threatened through gritted teeth, tightening his grip on the gun. May, as dumb as she is, took it as a game. "Quit messing around snoogywuggims, you wouldn't open fire on me," she said, batting her eyelashes at him. Ash cringed in utter disgust, "How much do you wanna bet bitch?" May just giggled and glomped him. Ash, utterly shocked from the 'surprise attack' accidentally pulled the trigger, wasting a bullet in the air. The bullet hit a Beedrill nest, which caused them to begin swarming out attacking the town. People ran screaming bloody murder as they ran from the oversized bees.
For some reason every time May touched Ash, let's just say unlucky bystanders get a taste of the Apocalypse. Ash was furious. He still had to go to that damn meeting with his episode writers, his Pikachu had lost sense of itself, he was being harassed by the red demon, and his hometown was in complete chaos, what over shit can go wrong? His thoughts were answered when he saw a certain Meowh balloon floating towards them. Ash wanted to shoot himself in the head for even wandering. "Awwwwwwwwwww fuckit……………….."
And that's Chapter 2! To those who are reading it R & R! Will try to update soon.