Let me start by saying: I sincerely apologise for the delay in updating.
I could go on and give a lot of excuses, but honeslty, the reasons I haven't updated in while are mainly 2. One -- I really need to focus in school if I don't want to flunk maths again, and Two -- I've been having this serious block (my plot bunnies have abandones me T.T)...
Also, I've been having this annoying focus-related-issue... I've been having too many ideas for at least 3 diferent original stories, but I never seem to be able to focus when it comes to this story, but today I forced myself to finish this chapter...
man, was it a hard chapter to write because I wanted to make a breakthrough come into sight, because, really, this story is already long, so I might as well start thinking about the end and all, so NO MORE STALLING chapters.
I'll end my rambles now... I could go on and on about what went right and what went wrong and what was harder and what was easier and why it took me so long to finish this chapter, but I won't.
So, without further ado, enjoy Chapter 24.
P.S.- Since I haven't updated in almost 3 months in a half and not everyone wants and/or has the time to read everything again, I made a memo about my OC characters and a summary about what's been happening.
P.S.S.- I think I may take a break for a while... I need to re-write the 10 or so first chapter of this story.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, just the plot of this story, a pile of manga/anime magazines and my very disjointed brain.
Memo:
- Hana: shoulder blade long light brown hair, brown eyes. Akatsuki's medic.
- Kai: spiky orange hair, green eyes. Puppeter, can use super strength when he gets really serious or is in a pinch.
- Ryo: black bluish short messy hair, dark purple/grey eyes. Can use water jutsus, and when needed can use snow and ice jutsus without having a kekkai genkai.
- Ruki: shoulder length long golden blond hair, golden eyes. Can use earth based jutsus. Has a very calculative mind. (think of Ed from FMA)
- Kaorin: long raven black hair, deep blue eyes. Can use Fire and Wind jutsus.
- Jin: blond hair in spikes at the back of his head, deep blue eyes. Can use Fire and Lightning jutsus. (his hair is kinda like Sasuke's, but for a better image, check Jin from 666 satan)
- Ryuuki: short spiky raven black hair, dark emerald green eyes with tints of onyx.
- Kyuuki: long raven coloured hair with some dark pink, almost red, highlights, and onyx eyes with a tint of dark emerald green in it.
Previously on The Secret Behind:
After Sasuke kidnapped the twins, Sakura went after him, ending up taking residence in Deidara's best friend, Fay, apartment.
In the meantime, Sasuke keeps having some inner turmoils, but little by little, he starts admitting things to himself and getting answers. He also 'hires' a personal assistant, Yukizora, to help with the paperwork, but also because he believes this particular 17 year old can come to accomplish great things in the future.
Farther away, in another country, Gaara and Naruto, after sending a letter for a supposed '6th Kage position' to Sasuke, start their journey to Amegakure with Ino, Shikamaru, Neji and Tenten.
Once they reach the meeting point, they make acquaintance with 4 members of the new Akatsuki, Hana, Kaorin, Kai and Jin. While Naruto watches the Ame-nins interact, he muses about himself and notices that something as to be done about Jin and Kaorin.
In the meantime, back in Amegakure, Ruki is taking care of the twins, who, after spending some time with him, start linking him, and after a little probing from his part, the twins admit that they know who their real father is, Sasuke, confirming his suspicions.
On a particular living room in the same city, Fay imposes himself on the conspiracy Sakura, Deidara, Kisame, Suigetsu and Kaorin were already aware of, and as a lack of ideas leave him surprised, Ryo shows up with salvation. The others won't be too much problem, but in the midst of it, Sakura gets into an argument with Deidara and just when he thought he was about to get the beating of his life, she breaks down. Reprehending her, her tells her to stop thinking so little of her mother skills, because she's the best mother he's ever seen or heard about.
Meanwhile, still in the same village, Sasuke assigns a D-rank mission to Amegakure's genin Team 4 who rather remind him of the Team 7 from his past (Kanzaki, the sensei, Midori, the shy or feisty girl, depending on the situation, Natsuki, the obnoxious troublemaker and Makoto, the nonchalant)… his reaction quite resembles that of the Godaime Hokage, Tsunade.
Chapter 24
"If you understand something in only one way, then you don't really understand it at all. The secret of what anything means to us depends on how we've connected it to all other things we know. Well-connected representations let you turn ideas around in your mind, to envision things from many perspectives until you find one that works for you. And that's what we mean by thinking!" - Marvin Minsky
To understand something, you had to, first of all, know the facts. Then you had to, and most importantly, have an open mind about the subject to be able to judge it without making preferences. And lastly, to understand something, you had to have a partial attitude towards it and you had to be able to accept it.
Uchiha Sasuke was starting to think that, at the point the situation was at, he did not understand what was really going on around him. At least when it came to the twins.
To start, at first he had thought he knew the facts behind it (his pink haired genin teammate had gone and screwed his replacement, later on giving birth to the kids) but now he wasn't so sure anymore. Sure, his replacement and himself had some resembling traits (dark hair and eyes) but they were extremely different in everything else, which made him confused and upset (and that's putting it lightly) when all the idiots that surrounded him commented on how they looked like him and (Oh My Fuckin' Kami) acted like him (hell, his replacement didn't have his personality, not in the least).
So now, he was starting to doubt the conclusions he had reached with the information he had gathered. He didn't know the facts anymore… back to square one.
He considered himself a pretty open-minded guy, known for keeping his cool and making decisions without his opinion interfering in the matter. But then, it was usually non-related to Sakura… and when it came to Sakura, everyone else's thoughts and opinions could just go to hell that he wouldn't care, his opinion was all that mattered and he acted without considering others. Which, now that he thought about it, was how he got himself into this stupid mess.
Lastly, if there was one thing he wasn't these days, it was partial and accepting. He was selfish and cared only about his selfish reasoning's, because, to begin with, he didn't want to accept Sakura being with his replacement and being a mother. So, no, he didn't fucking have a partial attitude towards the subject and he didn't fucking wanted to accept it.
So to make it short, Uchiha Sasuke was kinda at a loss, not understanding the whole situation he was in, because hell, it was really confusing him.
He sighed in frustration and slammed the dossier in his hands closed with a dry 'whuck'.
Running his hand through his hair and scratching the back of his head, he sighed again and looked out of the window, recently he hadn't bothered to make the weather rainy, he just let the villagers enjoy the sun.
There was no sound of footsteps, the door opening and closing or of anyone entering his office, yet he knew who was there just by the slight waver in the air. He so did not want to deal with him right now, he had enough troubling things going through his mind as it was. Alas, Kami-sama seemed to like annoying him these days-- he could bet the guy(s) upstairs were having a good laugh at his account.
"What do you want?" he didn't even bother to try and sound polite, the guy pissed him off, simple as that, so why bother with pleasantries? It was just a waste of time anyway.
"Hm… you were more polite after you killed your brother." Sasuke clenched his teeth, refraining from snapping at the annoying bipolar nin.
"What do you want?" he asked again, this time more forcefully and in a hiss. There was a light shuffling of cloth, until the man stood next to him, looking out at the village as well.
"Hm… I wonder." There was a pause. "I want revenge, you already know that." So, again with that topic. The raven haired man had to roll his eyes.
"And you should already know that your revenge won't happen, not in this lifetime." He turned back to his paperwork, ignoring the man, and took a stack of papers from the to-do pile of paper work (quite small today for some reason).
As silence settled (not very comfortable for the matter) something popped into his mind for some reason.
He didn't know how long ago, but somewhere he had read "Every single thing changes and is changing always in this world. Yet with the same light the moon goes on shining." It was from some guy named Saigyo, and, right now, he had no idea why, it seemed to make a lot of sense.
"Everything keeps changing, but some things are always there, unwavering." There were things, people, that changed, but at the same time didn't. Like his brother, he had changed, but deep down, he had stayed the same and done the things he had done because he actually hadn't changed.
Sasuke shook his head and tried to get his thoughts clearer, what if… he'd been wrong all along? Wrong about the things he wanted to be right, and because he was so stubbornly sure of what he thought he knew, he didn't even consider other options.
So… maybe… possibly… what everyone said… was actually the truth??
On the sidelines, Madara watched with a scowl and narrowed eyes behind his mask as Sasuke's bored and flat aura seemed to get brighter… giddier.
Everything that happens has a reason, although, those reasons may never be revealed.
That was what the Hokage concluded as he kept walking through the forest while looking at everyone. After all, this gigantic mess couldn't be happening in vain, especially since it concerned his sister and his rival-slash-best-friend.
It simply couldn't be some karma joke, because if it was, it would be a really sick, twisted and ass-biting one. But it wasn't, because there was too much connections and links and bonds between everything. He wasn't dumb after all, he just pretended to be!
On the calm journey to Amegakure bonding was done, and he befriended all 4 of the Ame nins—well, not all 4 of them, just Kai, Hana and Kaorin, Jin was just like Sasuke, a teme. They were much like his own friends. Hana and Kaorin had mingled well with Tenten and Ino, Jin was plainly anti-social (stick shoved up his ass kind of anti-social as the blond Hokage defined) and Kai was much like himself, which resulted in Gaara and Neji becoming annoyed, Shikamaru to say he was troublesome and the 2 of them becoming friends.
And that friendship was what allowed him to gather information about Amegakure, Sasuke as a leader (and surprisingly friend) and of Jin's pissy attitude and what he had done to hurt Kaorin.
The Hokage frowned and narrowed his eyes at the blond replica of his brooding best-friend (no matter how much time passed, the status Sasuke had to him would remain).
"Oi, Naruto, you ok?" he glanced to his right, where Kai was walking, brow raised. He crossed his arms behind his head and resumed his narrowed gaze to Jin (who, surprisingly was walking at the front).
"I'm fine." The orange haired male eyed him strangely, but then grinned.
"What are you plotting?" oh, that quiet, almost whispering conspiring tone made a sly smirk settle on the blonds' face. With a dark chuckle, both men leaned closer to each other, rubbing their hands together as they started whispering among themselves.
From the front, Jin cast a wary glance at the pair of obnoxious men behind him, he had a bad feeling for some reason.
From behind the 2 plotters, the girls were talking among themselves (there seemed to be a silent mutual agreement that the girls would stay in the middle).
"They're on to something." Ino crossed her arms, baby blue eyes narrowing. "I just know it." Tenten rolled her eyes.
"As if that's new." The brunette muttered. "Just let them be, they'll only be more annoying if you start asking questions." She waved a hand dismissively and Ino glared.
"Shut up, ok." Hana giggled, while Kaorin stole a worried glance at the blond and orange haired men.
"Shouldn't we stop them?" 3 pairs of eyes settled on her. "It usually never ends well when Kai starts plotting something…" her tone of voice screamed worried.
"And we all know Naruto's plans never end well either." Tenten piped in. Ino rolled her eyes.
"Whatever." She waved a hand, manicured nails painted blue flashing in the sunlight. "I'm bored ok, and even if they don't always end well, at least it's entertaining." She seemed determined and Tenten sighed.
"Here we go." Hana and Kaorin seemed confused, and even more when Ino started walking ahead of them. Tenten sighed again. "Oh, Kami-sama…"
Ino marched up to the 2 loud and bright colored haired men and swung her arms over their shoulder, while they instantly shut up.
"So, what're we plotting??" she asked cheerily. The males eyed her warily and her excited gaze turned warning. "And I am going to plot with you two."
They sighed and rolled their eyes, giving in to her.
"Fine, you're in." they both spoke, and 3 sets of eyes (2 blue and one green) became sly and a bit evil as Ino received an update of The Plan.
"So now we just wait… did I hear right?"
"Yeah, you did… baka." Rolls eyes.
"Oi, shut it ice-boy." Threatens.
"Enough you 2. Geez, and you're both supposed to be 23." Annoyed.
Silence.
"Whipped by a chick with pink hair." Smirk.
Silence.
Whack. From 2 different people.
"I said stop it." Getting angry.
Nervous gulps.
Rolls eyes, from other people.
"Kinda agree with shark-boy." Annoyed glare from artist best friend.
"What'd I tell ya, whipped." Mumble.
Silence.
Clears throat.
"So we just wait?"sighs and looks at ceiling.
"Yup, we'll put the plan into action when the others get here."
Nods head.
Shared glances.
"Who wants cookies?"
Weird looks towards the blond artist.
Raises hands in defense.
"What? Can't a guy be hungry anymore?" Huff.
In retrospection, he wasn't the brightest out of everyone, but he wasn't dumb either… he always knew that playing dumb was the best way at getting attention, so that's what he did, he acted dumb, like a buffoon, and he got attention. Granted it wasn't the kind of attention where you got praised, but it was attention nonetheless.
At a young age, he more of acted like an idiot and was slightly oblivious and hard-headed, not understanding everything, but as he grew and matured, he started understanding everything, but sometimes, it was better to pretend to not understand, because the concerned people didn't want others to understand… and it was kinda part of him to be oblivious to things, or so others said!
It was somehow confusing, but, bottom-line, he acted dumb but he understood most of what was going on around him.
In retrospection, he wasn't the brightest of the pack, but he managed, and while everyone thought they had him fooled and that he didn't notice the changes and, well, weird (at lack of better term) things going on, they were all thoroughly mistaken.
Earlier that day, he had come to the conclusion—well, not exactly conclusion, he just knew, deep down (call it a gut feeling) that this (whatever it was) that was happening with Sasuke, Sakura and the twins and involving all of them had meaning and connections, underlying to the surface. Connections that ran deep and would change everything.
Now, don't get him wrong, he wasn't all-knowing, so most of what he knew (thought he knew) was just him speculating about the information he gathered, but he knew something about Sakura, about the twins, that no one else seemed to see, and that Sakura had been hiding.
Yeah, sure, it managed to stick, but he knew it couldn't be, that Sakura and Sai just simply couldn't truly be together. It was all really simple to figure out, especially since Sakura was like a sister to him and they had practically grown up together. And Sai… sure, they were good friends, but not good enough to the point where they would spend a steamy night together. No, they were good friends to the point of sleepovers, but nothing else.
He knew (call it his gut feeling again) that Sai and Sakura weren't together, and he just knew that the twins weren't Sai's. But the guy was a good cover-up, especially when it came to resemblances.
When Sakura had announced the 'relationship' and her pregnancy, he had had this feeling that something was off, but he had brushed it off as being over protectiveness for his favorite girl (non-romantically speaking, romantically, his favorite girl was Hinata). But then, there was a lot that didn't stick with him.
Everyone else seemed to accept it, but he didn't (secretly of course). It was in the way they never really went on romantic dates, in the way that, on missions, they didn't steal glances at each other or tried to sneak away at night… in the way they never discussed their 'relationship' with anyone, and if asked, they never really wanted to talk about it.
And then the twins.
He had never said anything because he respected the fact Sakura didn't want to reveal her reasoning's, but he still felt betrayed and hurt that she wouldn't trust him enough to tell him the truth. And so he was left speculating.
Oh, but there was another reason why he knew she wasn't really with Sai, and that was something that had always been there, strong and unwavering, ever since they were genin, her love for Sasuke. And that love wouldn't have just left from day to night, and he was positive that she still loved him.
And so, the twins.
Two little adorable miracles that he loved as if they were his own. He loved those kids just like he would love his unborn child, because they were absolutely endearing. They also resembled their parents a lot.
At first, when Sakura announced her pregnancy, his first thought was that she had been raped and her sense of humanity didn't allow her to have an abortion. But then, if that were the case, even if she came to love the child, her eyes wouldn't take that special glint every time she spoke about it. She loved her babies from the start, something a rape victim wouldn't.
And then, as time went by and her belly started to grow round and cute and adorable, he saw the way she acted and looked, the devotion and pure love she held for the unborn child, the way her eyes sparkled and shined every time she would caress her stomach.
At that moment, he knew that she hadn't been raped, and that for her to love those gaki so much from the start, it had to be someone she truly loved that was the father.
And that lead to the only one that fit the profile: Uchiha Sasuke.
But of course, it was just him speculating. Though, he was pretty sure he had at least the raw outlines of it all right.
And his conclusion that Sasuke was the father was confirmed when the little bundles of joy were born. And again, Sai was a good cover up for his resemblances in physical appearance, namely pale skin, dark eyes and dark hair. But he knew better… he just knew.
Surprisingly… he was proud to have been the first person to see the twins. He had even been the one to cut their—what was it called again?... ah, right, umbilical cord. Sai (so not the father) had been on a mission, so he had had the great pleasure of being there with Sakura (getting his hand crushed into dust and being yelled at) and actually being the first person (other than the doctor and nurses, they didn't count) to hold the tiny babies.
He had honestly been ecstatic when the doctor had told him to cut the thingy, and after the nurses cleaned the small baby while the doctor worked on the other, they handed him the small bundle wrapped in a pale blue blanket telling him it was a boy. It had been so… out-of-this-world, per-se, to be the first to hold the tiny baby—a part of Sakura-chan. It had been amazing and he had been so ridiculously happy to be able to be there—to be wanted there to witness such a wonderful thing!! The baby had been so small, so fragile and so very cute!!
And then the doctor had given the second baby to the nurses, a just as tiny girl. After they had cleaned the little girl, they had handed her to a thoroughly exhausted Sakura. But as exhausted as she was, she was basking in the afterglow, that unadulterated love making her glow with all the happiness in the world.
Something he would never forget—ever—was that moment when he sat next to her sweaty figure on the messy hospital bed, cradling the small baby boy while she cradled the small baby girl. If anything, that moment had been one of pure happiness and perfection!
Sure, he knew he wasn't the one that should be basking in the afterglow with Sakura, and Ino was probably pissed she hadn't been the one in there, but Sakura had asked for him to be there, not anyone else, and that fact alone, for how insignificant it may seem, made him truly happy, because she wanted to share that wonderful and magical moment with him. It made his heart swell in happiness, because they had never shared something so meaningful!!
At that moment, no matter if he was hurt because she wouldn't tell him the truth, he had decided that he wouldn't care (too much), so long as he could be there for her and be able to take care of the little bundles of joy… to play with them, to cradle them and to lull them to sleep. To introduce them to the wonders of ramen!!
Because, no matter what, they were part of his family!!
And so, every time Sakura had to do something (be it a meeting with the Hokage, grocery shopping, helping at the hospital or just some girl time with the girls) he always volunteered to take care of the twins, Projection and Inspiration, Ryuuki and Kyuuki.
He wanted to be as much part of their lives as he could, and he was glad Sakura allowed him to be!!
And it was as he took care of them, his Kage Bushin useful so both babies had the same amount of attention given to them, that his theory about Sasuke being the father started to become more real as he took note of the little details that went unnoticed unless you looked very carefully. The shape of their eyes, the shape of their faces and even the onyx color in their eyes that mixed with the emerald green. While Sai's black eyes were pure black, Sasuke's were onyx, mixing with grey, and the dark color in the twin's eyes was grayish, not pure black.
He'd never said anything about his speculations to anyone—okay, that was partly a lie… on occasions, he'd talked to the twins (when they were babies) about their fathers' adventures. They'd giggle and have fun while he told his stories, gesturing around, twirling with them and even going as far as to use his Kage Bushin to entertain them… of course, no knew about this!!
With all this, he knew something (good or bad or even both) would come out of this ordeal with Sasuke and Sakura as main partakers. But whatever happened, as long as he would still have his family, he wasn't too worried… right now, he was just worried that the Teme's thick skull wouldn't figure it out and realize he was being an idiot.
Well, whatever would happen, would happen, he just hoped nothing too bad happened… or at least that nothing that couldn't be fixed happened.
When a snicker came from his right, he ended his musings and looked to see Kai and Ino looking absolutely devious. He smirked, knowing the plan and shoved his hands in his pockets.
"So, Operation Payback starts??" he asked with a just as devious as his co-plotters grin. Their grins widened, and he knew, now was time to have some fun.
Time seemed to pass quickly for him that day. Not long ago he had been in his office, dealing with paperwork he hated so much and having to put up with someone that annoyed him to no end. Whoever said, or ever thought, that life was easy was an idiot, because life was not easy, in fact, life was a bitch.
A silent sigh escaped his lips, his mind screaming 'What am I doing here?' as he stayed in the same place, leaning against the wall, hidden by the shadows, and kept watching the 2 small kids.
He knew Ruki would get in their hearts not after long, because even if the guy acted like a jackass most of the time, it was just a façade… being with the twins was making him act more like himself.
But Ruki didn't matter at the time, the twins did. Kyuuki was giggling while Ruki braided her hair and Ryuuki was playing with legos.
It had been a while since he had taken them… 5, 6 months??... time had passed alright, and somehow…
Another sigh escaped his lips… it was already July, not that it mattered much… how long had it been since he celebrated his birthday anyway? Speaking of birthday, it made him wonder when the kids were born… a detail he had failed to check.
Another sigh.
What was he doing? No, that wasn't the question he so badly wanted the answer to. Why was he so affected by the twins? That was the one he couldn't seem to get a reasonable and rational explanation for.
Gritting his teeth, he forced himself to walk away, because he couldn't take it, whatever it was that was starting to take over him. Was it too much to ask for something simple and good once in a while?? Something simple and good for him and not for everyone else.
He shouldn't have kidnapped them, he knew… they were innocent children who didn't belong in the endless conflict that existed among shinobi, they deserved a happy childhood, surrounded by love and everyone that loved them.
Closing the door of his bedroom, he let himself fall face first on the navy blue covered bed, exhaling a heavy sigh as he buried his head on one of the pillows.
He would have liked to say that, with so much on his mind, insomnia fell upon him, forcing him to keep thinking about everything. Alas, the situation was the complete opposite. A few moments after he fell upon his bed, exhaustion, both physical and mental, seemed to envelop him, his lids becoming heavy and his vision and thoughts hazy and blurred.
His dreams started out as blurs of colors and distorted sounds that he couldn't seem to identify, whirling around him as he seemed to be some kind of immaterial being just floating through space.
After what seemed like an eternity and just a second at the same time, the distorted voices faded and the color blurs became a night sky, filled with stars and a crescent moon. Somehow, he felt unusually calm and at peace.
He looked around, noticing he was still an immaterial being, and all he could see was the dark sky illuminated by twinkling and sparkling stars. Looking down, the sky seemed to continue, but a slight waver made him realize that, in fact, the sky was just being reflected in water, a seemingly infinite ocean under the infinite starry sky.
The sight possessed a beauty that could not be described by words, it was extremely real, but at the same time surreal… enchanting and entrancing.
The breeze blew past him, and at that moment, his body became a reality, some kind of force holding him in between the ocean and the sky.
The breeze was warm, like a summer breeze, as it ran across his skin, soothing him and comforting him. And in that infinitude of sky and stars, he felt completely at ease, as if life actually was easy, just like watching the stars.
The gentle breeze blew again, but this time it carried a sweet whisper of his name. "Sasuke-kun." A soft and sweet melody that he hadn't had the pleasure to hear in years.
He closed his eyes as the warm breeze blew past him again, carrying his name in it again, her voice invading his senses, as if she was whispering in his ear.
The light scent of vanilla, peppermint mixed with rain and cherry blossoms wafted around him, and he let out a contended sigh, letting himself be engulfed in her, vanilla and peppermint probably from the beauty products she used, and cherry blossoms and rain her natural scent, like her namesake.
When he opened his eyes, facing below, there was no longer an ocean and he was now standing on a grass field. Lifting his eyes forward, he was greeted by the almost same beauty as previously, only now he had an earthly point of view over the ocean meeting the sky, reflecting the stars and moon and creating the illusion of infinity.
Time seemed to stand still, the breeze having disappeared, but the whisper of his name reached his ears all the same, followed by the soft scent of her.
He tried to locate her voice as she repeated his name, but couldn't as it seemed to come from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. She was a paradox, his own unsolvable enigma, because he never seemed to be quite able to figure her out.
He sighed, the simple and easy-going thoughts starting to be replaced by more complex ones. Why would she be here anyway? She probably wanted his head in a silver platter for what he had done (and was doing).
"Sasuke-kun." Her voice reached him again, a sweet whisper that held an emotion he dared not mention, because he didn't deserve it, he never had.
The scenery wavered below him, a tree appearing next to him and the grassy field acquiring shore, the almost unmoving water gently lapping at the small patches of sand.
"Sasuke-kun." He closed his eyes tightly, willing her to go away, to stop whatever she was doing… willed her to stop saying his name with that oh-so-soft and oh-so-gentle display of emotion. Because his heart constricted every time she did it, every time she said his name like that.
"Sasuke-kun." She was calling him, beckoning him to… something he was oblivious to.
The air around him shifted, the pleasant scent of her becoming stronger, enveloping him, entrancing him. And making him wish he was someone else, someone who could have a life with her.
"Sasuke-kun." The sweet whisper of his name again, but this time it was different. His eyes snapped open in slight shock. He didn't need to bottle everything up in his dreams.
Slender arms wrapped around him shoulders, feminine curves pressing against his back, warm and sweet breath caressing the skin of his neck, soft meshes of hair tickling the skin of his shoulder that wasn't covered.
"Suki yo, Sasuke-kun!(1)" he felt her arms tightening around his shoulders and her face press against his neck. His mouth felt dry, a lump formed in his throat and his eyes stung.
He tried to say something, but nothing came. What could he say anyway? I'm sorry was the only thing that occurred to him, but saying sorry wouldn't earn him her forgiveness. He didn't deserve her forgiveness, not matter what he did or said.
Against his neck, she shook her head, as if denying something.
"Iie.(2)" There was a small pause. "Sasuke-kun ga, suki janai.(3)" His heart clenched painfully, each beat a ruthless stabbing pain. But he didn't have time to tell himself he deserved it, because she continued, her voice soft and gentle, as if explaining something to a confused child.
"Sasuke-kun ga, aishite imasu!(4)" unwillingly, his heart swelled with unadulterated joy, but his throat constricted further and he had to blink a few times to will the stinging feeling away. This was torture at its rawest form.
He wanted to turn around and hold her tightly, kiss her until she was out of breath… make love to her until they were too exhausted to move. But he didn't, because he deserved not even the simplest of gentle gestures from her… he deserved nothing from her other than hate.
His inner struggles were cut short by her soft voice, a whisper really. A sad question.
"Ne, Sasuke-kun, why won't you hold me?" he didn't answer, couldn't, it was too painful. Sweet temptation… more painful than the most gruesome and ruthless injuries of battle. More painful than all the injuries he had ever suffered gathered together.
"I miss you Sasuke-kun…" her voice was soft, a mere whisper against the flesh of his neck. Pain. Pain. Unbearable pain. "I miss you so much." Wet and lukewarm, slowly running from her flesh to his. Tears.
No. No. No.
Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.
I don't want you to cry. No more tears. Please. No more tears.
You're not supposed to cry over me. Not anymore. So stop crying. Please. Please stop crying.
Her tears, he concluded, would always lead to his undoing.
Her tears, slowly rolling down her cheeks and into the junction of his neck and shoulder, were what made what little control he had in himself come undone, snap, turn into microscopic specks of dust and disappear into nothingness.
Her tears were what made him turn around, desperation eating at his insides, and wrap his arms tightly around her smaller frame, as if she could disappear if he didn't. She probably would.
"I miss you too." His voice came out a strangled whisper, his throat feeling raw and his insides clenching as he buried his face in the softness of her soft hair. Oh, how he missed her. So much. So very much. So much it hurt.
She sniffed and slightly trembled in his arms, her warm tears now running down her cheeks and into his shirt. How he hated himself for making her cry. For making her sad. For making her hurt.
Time in the dream realm seemed to pass both excruciatingly slow and painfully fast, but he couldn't bring himself to care, the warmth of her body, the lingering scent of her and her arms wrapped around him made him not care about anything else but just that, her warmth, her scent, just her.
And as the darkness of night started to fade into the light of day, the sun peeking out from the horizon, being reflected in the seemingly endless ocean of his dreams, she raised her head.
Her eyes, as green as the forest and more beautiful than anything else entranced him, but the words she spoke—whispered really, were what made him snap awake, sitting up on the bed abruptly, eyes wide and sweaty all over. His breaths came in harsh pants and his heart seemed ready to explode inside his ribcage from how fast it was beating.
"Come to me and I'll forgive you."
Golden eyes watched the small bundles under the sheets for a few seconds, taking note of their breathing, signaling that the small twins were sound asleep, before looking out of the window.
It was still night, but he had always had an habit of awaking in the middle of sleep ever since he was a child, because, as a child, the middle of the night would be when his parents would open their home doors to their friends and comrades to plan and plot, forming conspiracy plans for the coup d'état. Other nights, always in the middle of the night, they would fight, his father idealistic and his mother down-to-earth, both trying to come to terms so that he, a mere child, would not suffer from what they planned to do.
Most nights though, it would be conspiracy. Sometimes he would listen, not quite understanding what was said, but retaining every little detail anyway. Other times he would take all his pillows and plushies and burry himself under them, sealing the sounds of voices away.
When his parents argued, fought, he would cry, hiding in the farthest corner of his closet with his favorite plushie and blanket, he would stay in the shadows and cry.
During those nights—no, not during those nights, because of those nights, he had gained a power, a skill, that he had only read about in books, years later, when his parents were no longer there and he turned his back on his village, making as much damage and taking as much important documents as he could—which turned out to be a lot.
Apparently, the skill he had, only a few had it too, but unlike many other skills, his wasn't a bloodline, it was, in simple words, the fruition of over-creative imagination. Or something in those lines.
He had never told anyone about it thought, after all, who would believe him anyway, especially when this particular skill was only heard in rumors and old stories.
But he knew it was real.
His skill, explaining in a simple way, allowed him to create a path between subconscious so that 2, or even more, people could express themselves freely, saying things they could not in person to other. Resuming, he bound dreams so that 2 people or more could communicate.
It probably sounded weird, to say the least, but it had worked so far. The mother of the twins, whose stay in Ame he was well aware of, had had some revelations with one of his dreams, and unconsciously and not too much aware, Sasuke had taken part in that dream, giving her the answer she either refused to admit of desperately needed.
As for Sasuke, the dreams he had just woken up from was another of his creations, in which his pink haired beloved had taken part to give him some answer, to make him do something.
In these dreams, all feeling shared were real, but of course, the people in it didn't know that.
I hope you enjoyed reading !! Please let me know if you did, what you liked, what you're expecting, what you'd like to see, what you wouldn't, etc... I love to hear (read) what you guys think.
*cough* This is the same as begging for reviews, so PLEASE REVIEW, reviews make me extremely happy.
Side-note (not so much on the side) --
(1) - 'Suki yo, Sasuke-kun!' means 'I like you, Sasuke-kun!' -- used by girls
(2) - 'Iie.' means 'No.'
(3) - 'Sasuke-kun ga, suki janai.' means 'I don't like Sasuke-kun.'
(4) - 'Sasuke-kun ga, aishite imasu!' means 'I love Sasuke-kun!' -- a very open way of saying I love you btw.