Omg, could it be???!!! (that rimes with an r-i-m-e-s because i dont like the right way you spell it) Yup I'm writing chapter. yayy for you :)

Let the randomness occur!!! (I'm out of ideas so dont critisize the crazy-randomness that youll be like "wtfooj?")

"My name?" I asked. "Why, uhm, Timothy, of course!!" I said to a guy who happened to be hitting on me.

"HEY!" Rosalie growled. "She's mine!!"

"I hate you anyway, rosaline!!!" this dude said with no capital letter and also with an "n" in it.

Rosalie and I went to the park and said "Duuuuuuuurrrrrrr". "Lets Go Scissor!!" I exclaimed.

We ended up not scissoring because Edward scissored with her.

Sigh.

"Hey Bella..." Edward said. "BELLA?"

"Hmmmmm yeah?" I said.

"Guess who I talked to?"

"Hmm, who?"

"The--"

"I always thought you were gay!!!!!!"

His eyes got very wide he looked down to his chicken-cock-ish area and then back up, "I am NOT!!!!" Then. he got a hard-on.

Awkward... "Bloop" I said.

"What," he said, "are you crapping or something?" He looked down. "Bloop. Oooohhh.....there it goes."

I gave him a look and peered at his butt. Ooooh, fine.

"W-well.." Edward said, "YOUR EYES ARE AN ASSWIPE!!!" It's true. my eyes are very brown.

"Your eyes are a bullshit wipe!!" I retorted...but it made no sense.

Alice came up and stuck her tongue out at Eddy-wardo. "It's okay Bella, your eyes aren't an asswipe...your hands are." UGHHH she was sooooo right!!!!!

Edward tried to sing The Kill by 30 Minutes to Jupiter...he doesnt even know the lyrics!!!

"He doesnt even know the lyrics...oh my God," I muttered to Alice.

"Yessss?" she answered. Huh? "You said God and I answered."

I laughed. ha. ha. ha.

"Why are you laughing at me?! I'm God!!! YOU'RE GOING TO HELL!!!!"

I started to talk to Edward. "Yep and then God said...blah. oh and also the blah-blahtey blah blash!!"

"Oh I see," Alice said bitterly. "Talking to Edward and not me, turning yo back on GOD!!!??"

I ignored her and continued flirting with my fiance...

"Yeah, Blah, I love Asian Porn."

GASP!!!! Edward-i-o-y watches PORN!!!!!

"ALICE!!!" I screeched. "Edward watches porn!!!! He said so!!! Punish him and send him to hell!!!"

"No. Because you turned yo back on me...Bitch."

And also...the end :)

(Says Car-god-lisle, not Al-god-ice)

Toldja it was weird and random =P