When I regained consciousness sometime later, I opened my eyes. I wasn't sure where I was, but it looked a lot like the waiting room of the hospital, and then I remembered why I was there; I had killed Bella.
Oh, If only I could have hit my head on the way down and gotten brain damage! If only I could forget, be completely, totally blissfully ignorant of what I had done, what I had committed- murder. I stood up from where I had been sitting - probably by Charlie, or a nurse - and stumbled back as the full force of what I had done to Bella - my poor Bella - hit me like a ton of bricks.
But somehow, even though I had seen her limp, broken body with my own eyes, I did not believe in my heart that she was truly gone. Stop pretending Jacob, I hissed to myself. She's gone, because of you, you're the reason she's dead I thought.
I felt a slight tug in my chest pulling me to something down one of the corridors. Curious, I looked down, but my shirt hadn't caught on to anything- no, this was inside me. It felt like the connection that pulled me toward Bella, but that was ridiculous. It was probably just my subconscious trying to get me out of the hospital, or maybe even to glance at her cold, lifeless body for one last time before the... the funeral.
It took me a few seconds to realize that I was following the tug, walking towards whatever it was that I was mysteriously drawn to. Not even knowing where I was going, I squeezed my eyes shut and walked zombie style down the eerily quiet hallways of the Quileute hospital, my noisy footsteps echoing around the walls.
When my hands touched the metal of a doorknob, I knew where I was being drawn to from the beautiful scent that seeped out under the crack in the door- Bella's room. I tried to breathe in, but noticed that I was crying, and I chocked on the air.
The door creaked open, and I saw who was there. Or, I guess I should say- who wasn't there. The window swung open and closed, just like they do in cartoons when somebody has run away and I knew that Bella had escaped somehow. I could also tell, from the musky, woodsy scent mingled with her blood, that she had not done it human.
The mystery that presented to me held only a small part of my attention. Bella was alive, and that was all that mattered for now. I exploded out of my clothes without even thinking about it, and sauntered out the window, cushioning the impact with my large soft paws.
Behind a row of rosebushes, I could see the behind of a large golden wolf- Bella. It was her, she was alive- but that didn't mean that I had done nothing- I had still attacked her, still nearly killed her and there was no way of knowing whether or not she would forgive me. She shouldn't. I was still very seriously considering the option of jumping off a cliff, or throwing myself under a truck so that I could stop causing the people I loved pain.
It probably wouldn't have done much though, so I stepped up behind her and whispered cautiously- Bella? I asked. Her chocolate brown eyes met mine, and she loped towards me. I braced myself, ready, and fairly willing, for her to rightfully attack me, but instead felt something warm against my furry cheek. I opened my squinted eyes, and was surprised to see Bella, nuzzling me like there was no tomorrow, and knew that she had, by some miracle, forgiven me.