Please let this all be a dream. Please, please, oh please let this be a dream! I was terrified to open my eyes, but I knew sooner or later I would have to face what awaited me. I slowly opened my eyes, and there he was.
"Hey there beautiful" he said with a grin.
I closed my eyes again and groaned. "Can you leave me alone now?"
When he didn't answer, I hoped he actually listened to me and left, but I knew I wasn't that lucky. I opened my eyes again, and found him staring at me intently. He no longer was grinning and I noticed he was fully dressed again.
"Leah . . . we should talk"
"Jensen, I'm embarrassed enough as it is. Can we talk another time?"
"I'm not dumb, Leah. As soon as I leave, you're never going to talk to me about what just happened between us."
My mind started racing. What did happen between us? I was so consumed with need and heat that I wasn't sure what really did happen.
"Just tell me one thing. Please just tell me that we didn't fuck" I used the crude word to antagonize him, but oddly, it sent a jolt to my system.
"What do you think we did?" he countered, though I did detect a hint of irritation in his voice.
I was angry. Why didn't he leave me alone when I asked him to? Why did he have to go and find me? I knew I was being unreasonable because he was my soul mate after all, but I was too afraid that he would find out that I had imprinted on him. And the fear brought conviction to the anger in my voice.
"You know what? I don't care what we did! Just leave me the fuck alone!"
He narrowed his eyes, and I could see that he was finally angry.
"You ungrateful little bitch" he said, and left the tent.
I lay in the tent, biting my lip so I wouldn't call him back. Tears pooled in my eyes, and I let them fall silently. I did the right thing. He could never know that I imprinted on him. He wouldn't even understand what that means. It really was better for me to run him off, then to let a relationship build between us. Since I had no choice on who I imprinted on, I at least wanted a choice on whether or not I would pursue the relationship. I decided being alone was better than being rejected. So I would not give Jensen the opportunity to reject me. And, God help me, he will never know the true power he has over me.
I stayed in my tent for another couple of days to make sure the heat was completely over. I didn't want to take any chances with my pack mates. Although the majority of them had imprinted already, I didn't know how they would react to me being in heat. The first thing I needed to do was to talk to Jacob, and let him know what was going on with me. So I went looking for Jacob on his usual route since I knew he would be on patrol. When I finally found him, I asked him to phase back to his human form so we could talk. I waited while he got changed behind a tree.
"What's up, Leah? Where have you been?"
"Um, I've been sort of camping."
"So, what's up? What did you want to talk about?"
"There's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to spit it out. Don't get all weird on me, k? I went into heat, and that's why I haven't been around this past week"
"You're not serious, are you?"
"Why would I make something like that up?"
"Wow. Hmm, I don't know what to say."
"Look. I'm just letting you know so you don't wonder where I am every month when I disappear. Also, can you make sure no one tries to find me during that time of the month?"
"Oh yeah! Jensen was looking for you. Did he find you?"
"Yeah, he found me, but I don't think he'll be looking for me again" I said morosely. "I'll be on patrol in about an hour."
"Sure, sure. See ya" Jacob said and ran off to phase.
I saw red. How could he do this to me, that son of a bitch!! As was my habit, I went looking for Jensen during my patrol to spy on him, and to see if he was still angry at me. I finally saw him through the front window of the Cullens' house, and that bastard had his arm around Tanya. I knew Tanya from her previous visits, and I knew she was like a cousin to the Cullens, but I wanted to tear her apart. What was she doing here? Why was his arm around that bitch!?!