Chapter 4

For the next two weeks Harry Potter lay in a coma, completely oblivious to the world around him. During this time his most constant visitor was, to everyone's surprise, Severus Snape. No one, however, was more surprised than Snape himself. He had a lot of time to think and he realized that his feelings toward Harry had been, not only irrational, but also unfounded. He had taken his hatred toward James Potter and took it out on the poor boy that (unfortunately) looked just like James. Except for his eyes. . . Those beautiful green eyes which reminded Snape so much of Lily. Beautiful, kind Lily.

He had been assigned to tutor her in Potions in their sixth year. He didn't want to at first, but over time he got to know her and realized what a remarkable person she was. They grew to be close friends, despite Potter's objections. She had been the one person who has cared about him. She had listened as he told her of his home life, of the abuse he had suffered at the hands of his father. She had held him as he cried, and she was the one who had finally convinced him to tell Albus. And James Potter had stolen her from him. No one else knew that he had loved Lily and that when he professed his love for her she had rejected him. She had gently told him she was in love with James and that she did love Snape, but only as a friend.

His heart had been broken. So, in his anger and despair, he had joined the Death Eaters. All too soon he had realized what he had gotten himself into. He had been disgusted by his own actions and the actions of his fellow Death Eaters. So he had went to Albus, confessed everything, and begged for his help. Albus had taken him in, protected him, and given his life a purpose. Severus Snape became a spy. From that day on Snape hid his true feelings and emotions behind the guise of the perfect Death Eater. Snape had build up walls around his heart.....and they were crumbling. He looked at Harry for the first time without his misconceptions and realized what a hell his life must be. Snape felt his heart ache with sympathy for this boy who had gone through so much in his short life. He had survived abuse, deaths of friends and family, ridicule and persecution by the press and his classmates, and many attempts on his life by Voldemort and the Death Eaters. Snape decided to have a talk with Harry when he woke. I will explain to him that, while my behavior toward him cannot change in public, I do not hate him and I respect him for bravery and strength he has shown all these years.

"Severus...."

Snape looked up to see Poppy approaching.

"Albus would like you to meet him in his office as soon as possible."

Snape nodded and stood.

He reached the Headmaster's office and knocked once before entering.

"You wanted to see me, Albus?" He said as he sat down.

"Yes," Albus said as he picked up a letter off his desk and sat in a chair in front of Snape. He took a deep breath before speaking again.

"I have something to tell you. I want you to know I had no knowledge of this until last night due to a memory charm that was designed to end at midnight last night. I now know that James was unable to father a child due to a childhood illness that left him sterile. However, they very much wanted a child. Since there was nothing wrong with Lily they decided to have someone else father the child." Snape's eyes widened slightly and he started to speak. "Please, let me finish. Apparently there is a muggle procedure that they were able to use to accomplish this. They wanted the father to be someone they knew, so they chose one of Lily's best friends. Nine months later Harry was born. Lily told me all this only after I agreed to a memory charm. You see they thought the child might be in danger if anyone knew the identity of his biological father." Understanding and disbelief dawned in Snape's eyes as Albus continued. "They gave Harry a powerful potion to make him look like James until his sixteenth birthday when it would start to wear off. She also told me that his real father asked for a memory charm in order to help protect the child. She designed his charm to end when you touch the seal on this letter." Albus held the letter out to Snape.

Snape looked at Albus in horror. "This is not possible. James Potter would never have agreed to raise my child. Why wouldn't they ask one of his friends?"

"I asked that myself when Lily told me. She said she and James didn't think they would agree to it. They also wanted the father to be someone who was unlikely to try to claim the child later on."

Snape ran a hand through his hair, still refusing to touch the letter. "Albus....."

"Is it so hard to believe you have a son, or is it because it's Harry?"

"No, yes, I don't know. I . . . . He hates me." Snape gave a bitter laugh. "I've spent the last five years making sure of that."

Albus leaned forward. "He doesn't know you, Severus. In fact, I think I am the only one who does. Please, at least try for Harry's sake if not your own. The thing Harry longs for most is a family of his own. He will need the strength and support of a father in the years to come. You owe it to him to try." He held out the letter again.

Snape took it and studied the yellow seal with an imprint of a lily. "He will never forgive me."

"I believe you are wrong. Harry is a very loving and forgiving young man. Just give him time and let him get to know you."

Snape took a deep breath and opened the letter. He gasped as the memories came flooding back. He saw Lily begging him to father their child. He saw himself holding Harry the day he was born and felt the pride that had welled up at thought that this was HIS son. He remembered the pain he had felt as he handed the baby to James and left. He remembered asking Lily for the memory charm not only for Harry's protection as he told her, but also to forget the pain of watching someone else raise his son. He opened his eyes and saw Albus standing over him looking concerned.

"I'm fine, Albus," he said, standing up shakily.

"Did you remember?" Albus asked gently.

Albus saw the anguish that flashed through Snape's eyes as he answered. "Yes."

Albus' expression was sympathetic and he laid his hand on Snape's shoulder, "Was it that bad?"

"Yes," Snape said in a tone that clearly said he didn't want to talk about it. "I must be going," he said and left the office.

Snape had reached his rooms and had to down two glasses of firewhiskey before he could make himself read Lily's letter. He sat down in front of the fireplace and pulled out the piece of yellowing parchment.

Dearest Severus,

If you are reading this then I am dead and our son is now sixteen years old. I am sorry I went against your wishes. I know you wanted a permanent memory charm, but I just couldn't let Harry go through life without any parents if we died. I hope by now Voldemort is gone and the two of you can enjoy your lives as father and son. I also wanted to thank you yet again for giving James and I what time we had with Harry. I hope that now you can enjoy your time with him and see what a wonderful, loving child he is. Please look after him, and protect him. Severus, my dearest friend, I love you and I wish you all the best in life. Most of all, I wish that you find happiness.

Love,

Lily

Severus let the letter drop from his hands as tears fell freely from his eyes for the first time in fifteen years.

Late that night Snape stood next to Harry's bed. He had been unable to sleep due to the memories replaying in his mind. He closed his eyes and remembered how he felt when he first held Harry. Snape smiled as he remembered examining Harry's perfect little face and fingers. He remembered how those fingers had closed around his own with surprising strength, as if they would never let him go. He reached out and brushed a lock of hair from Harry's face. My son, he thought. He sighed and settled into a chair next to the boy's bed.

A/N that's it for now. I hope everyone enjoys it. Next chapter Harry wakes and gets and get a startling revelation(gee, I wonder what that could be). The next one will be up in about a week or sooner if I can manage it. Thanks for the reviews Hp's Twin, AuroraAbbie Snape, ShadowedHand, rosiegirl, aaaaaaannnddd ebonpinion..

sorry about the delay. I tried to get this posted on Sunday, but FF was not cooperating. Please review.