Chapter 30
I think I understand why people commit suicide. Not that I'd ever consider doing it myself, it's just I think I get where they're coming from. It's a suck feeling. It's like all the colours around you have faded, making the world just one gray place and you're all alone in it.
That's basically how I feel right now.
First of all, you need to know something. I have never been rejected. Ever. I mean, there are those select few girls who try to play hard to get because they think that'll increase their sexiness or something. Yet I've always ended up getting those girls. No girl has ever flat out told me no. I've told girls I loved them, even if I never really meant it, and they all said it back.
All except Kagome.
And the worse part of that is that out of all the girls I've ever said 'I love you' to, she's the only one I ever really loved.
Yet she chose Hojo. Over me.
Now that I think about it, as I lie in bed doing nothing for the third day in a row, I can see why. What's to like about me? I'm a jerk. I treat girls like shit. I don't even think I look that nice. I just never argued it because everyone else claimed I did. I mean, I have silver hair and gold eyes. What a freak show. Plus, I'm completely fake around everyone.
Everyone but Kagome.
Whoever said love was a magical and glorious thing is full of shit. Love sucks. It's a cruel game of cat and mouse. All you do is keep your love a secret until, one day, you decide to go after your 'one and only'. After trying to get them to love you they can either go with you or leave you in the dust. Besides, most relationships don't even work out. I don't even need love. Who does?
Determined that my 'no love needed' theory would work, I got out of bed and jumped into the shower. I threw on some jeans and a striped long sleeve shirt, then went over to Miroku's room.
"Hey man."
He was pulling on a black hoodie and nodded for me to come in.
"Hey InuYasha. How's the whole getting over Kagome thing going?"
Dammit Miroku.
"Ugh."
I fell on my stomach on the bed, my theory evaporating as I did so.
"Oops. I think I just planted her back in your head, eh?"
"You suck ass."
I growled into the bed, making Miroku laugh as he sat down on the bed.
"So you've officially hit rock bottom."
"Ugh."
"You know, it's not that hard to tell if she really doesn't love you."
"What the hell are you talk ing about?"
I mumbled.
"Just make her jealous. See what she does."
That perked my interest. I lifted my head from the bed and cocked an eyebrow.
"Explain."
"Well, maybe Kagome is just with Hojo to…I don't know, spark something in you. So why don't you do the same? Just pick a girl and have a relationship with her. See what Kagome thinks of that."
"That…might work. But how do I just pick a girl?"
"You're InuYasha. It won't be that hard. But you have to pick someone that Kagome doesn't particularly like. Someone who would make her even more jealous."
Miroku's idea triggered something in me. Something called determination.
"I'll do it."
"Okay man, but you'll need some training."
"What? I already have experience with girls, dummy."
Miroku laughed and shook his head.
"Awe, naïve InuYasha. I'm not talking about that. You may have experience getting girls, but you have no clue how to keep them. Plus, we have to make sure that when you see Kagome with Hojo you're not going to crumble into a pathetic loser."
I nodded my head with intensity.
"Alright. But how am I going to learn all of this by school on Monday?"'
Miroku cracked a smile and pointed to himself.
"Okay man."
I sat up, positioning myself so I was leaning closer to him.
"Teach me."