Song Five: Stand In The Rain by Superchick

She never slows down.
She doesn't know why but she knows that when she's all alone, feels like its all coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long and she fears if she cries that first tear, the tears will not stop raining down

Edward Elric moves hesitantly into his room as he hears the loud, drunken singing of his military colleagues quieten as they depart from the group into their separate bedrooms. No doubt some would end up in places they did not expect in the morning, but all should be silent until then.

Which is never, ever a good thing.

He feels the waves of what he suppresses during the day hit him like a kick below the belt as he closes the door and stiffly moves into the centre of the empty room.

Without his brother -metal or not- the room did not seem complete and it was seconds before the aloneness and feeling of not fitting in feeling had him on his knees.

His brother wasn't even in central any more. He had gone to live in Resembool when he found out how Edward has revived him. He wouldn't speak to his big brother any more, he wouldn't even acknowledge him.

After all, the prodigy had sacrificed an alive human to bring back his little brother. The man was murderer; already about to be executed when Edward requested his test. The test that had succeeded in bringing Alphonse Elric back from the dead.

The younger Elric was still not happy.

The blond struggles to crouch again, being on the floor would not help his condition. With all his effort -which amounted to little since his brother left him alone- he managed to drag himself to the uncomfortable bed, where he lay exhausted, but still wide awake.

He was pathetic.

Without his younger brother to hold him together, Edward was a piece of broken glass. Broken, shattered, unrepairable glass.

He could do nothing about the lonely feeling or the self hatred. Or his none existing love life.

When he was alone, the shadows crept up and he saw his nightmares alive; Al dead on the floor, John Tucker smiling sadistically at him, Barry the Chopper coming at him with a knife, Nina as a chimera, Winry's scared face and the worst of all:

The night when Alphonse left him.

In his hallucinations -which he had on a regular basis, regardless of how he knew they were unreal- and his nightmares -which he also had on a regular basis- he could see nothing but the back of his brothers head. Walking calmly, without hesitation further and further away from him. And he would run till his legs fell beneath him and all he could do was stare at his dear, dear brothers back and watch.

He yearned to shout out to him; to plead with him to return, but the nightmare had only just started and he would be on the verge of tears as he saw another figure walking away from him, just as calmly and without an ounce of regret.

When he first saw the black, well kept hair of Roy Mustang, his heart jumped and pain erupted like a volcano through his memories, burning and destroying.

That was when he would awaken screaming.

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, what's lost can be found
You stand in the rain

Three sharp, demanding knocks startled Edward Elric the next morning into screaming awake.

He had had the terrible nightmare again, and when he heard the knocks was just when he could no longer distinguish Roy from Alphonse as they walked away from him, side by side.

"Elric?! Is everything okay in there?" When Roy Mustang, who had finally reached his goal of Furher, got no reply other than the extinguish of the terrified screeches to his frantic question, he barged through the locked wooden door to see a jumpy Edward, his breathing irregular and the normally hidden bags under his eyes even more obvious. His golden locks were out of their usual braid and messy, and he looked like he had just spent a night in hell.

When exhaustion finally hit, the Elric had to lean again his wall to stay upright.

Within seconds, Roy was by his side, asking millions of questions.

"You okay, Fullmetal? You look pretty tired. Dont tell me one night of drinking does this to you? You must have a terrible hangover to match that I certainly dont envy. Speaking of Envy, we've spotted him again, I thought you said he was dead? Still, you look like you've been to hell and back, are you ill or something? I know this one--"

"...Quiet." The tiny whisper from the blond silenced the leader, as he waited for some sort of reason to his terrible appearence.

With one wheezy breathe in, Edward steadied himself and prepared himself to get up. With one heave, which consequently happened most mornings, the eighteen year old alchemist lifted himself onto his pained feet.

"How are you even standing in the condition?!" The horrified whisper from his official had not startled the Elric; he had been expecting this question from the moment he tried to upright himself.

"How I do every morning, Furhur."

She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself and the fears whispering if she stands she'll fall down
She wants to be found
The only way out is through everything she's running from wants to give up and lie down.

"But... You get up in that condition every morning? How has not come to my attention, I see you everyday?! I think it's time you took a vacation-"

"No!" The pure terror lacing his words made Mustang back pedal at once.

"No... If I stop trying, if I stop pushing every day... I don't know what will happen... and I'll be all alone, and they'll be back and it wont help!" As Edward rambled panicking, as his hands tugged at the outrageous locks, the black haired man finally realised what had gone wrong.

"You... don't want a vacation?" Confusion filled his head as Edward nodded silently before stating,

"If I don't do anything... well you can see my condition. I know if I have a vacation ...even for one day.... this," He pointed to himself as finally couldn't take standing up any longer and fell back to the bed. "...will get much worst." The boy was breathless as he closed his eyes once again, conserving whatever energy he had.

"Get out, I need to get dressed." The Fuhruh tried to protest:

"You can't possibly expect me to let you work in that condition, the people next door have been complaining for months about screaming, I only came to ask you if you knew who it was-"

"I was the fucking screaming, Roy! It was all me! There is your answer! Now get the fuck out of my room." The black haired man backed slowly out the room, astonished by the harsh tones and by how long his subordinate had been in such a terrible condition.

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

Outside the room, Roy leant against the wall, gradually slipping down it until he was sitting down.

Unanswered questions sounded through his head as he worried about the man he had become quite fond of.

Guilt overtook him as he realise how oblivious he was. This had been happening for months and he had no idea about it. He hadn't even considered it a possibility. he thought once again to the picture in his mind of when Edward had gotten up and he had a thought.

'No matter what, I will fix this.'

Mwuhaahahaha, finally I wrote a new chapter. I love this song, I really do. It's fantastic. Depressing, sure, but still a great song.

Too repetative though, I had to not use some of the choruses cause they're all the same T.T

Please review, I love to know what you think.

Tell me of any words I got wrong, or if the context somewhere is wrong or whatever please.

Disclaimer- I dont own Fullmetal Alchemist, its characters, the song(Or songs, I dont believe I put a disclaimer on any of the other songs either...) and whatever else :D

Hope you enjoyed the chapter :)

LixxyChan xx