"Thank you." Chase whispered into Meredith's ear.

"This is really stupid, Chase. Really, unbelievably stupid! We are both going to be thrown out of Seattle Grace on our asses!" She said, staring up at the ceiling in her room. She realizes it really needs to be painted.

"It will be fine. Don't worry." He leaned over and kissed her neck, she turned her head, kissing him on the lips.

"My roommates are moving in tomorrow." She said, pulling away.

"Roommates? You don't need roommates!" He stated. He didn't want anyone to move in. He wanted her to be all his, and he felt selfish thinking it.

"Izzie and George. I thought you and I were over. Which, we should be. But anyway. I thought we were over, so I decided to get roommates. Besides they will help keep the house clean, and Izzie can bake and cook." She stated, hoping to win him over. She flashed him a smile.

"So now we'll really have to sneak..." He said, grouping her under the sheet.

"Yes, I guess we will." She squealed.

-----------------------

"Get up." She shouted at Chase. It was four a.m. and time for him to get up for work.

"I can't work, you tired me out." He moaned. "I'm jealous, you get to stay home."

"Hey, I have been working my ass off!" She shot her head over at him.

"I know you have. I just want to stay here in bed with you all day." He replied slyly.

"Go."

"Fine." He had been defeated. She rolled over and closed her eyes, listening to him start the shower.

Meredith fell back asleep for a few hours. She awoke abruptly to her cellphone ringing. It will go to voicemail. I just want to sleep! The phone quit ringing. A few minutes later, it rang again. Son-of-a-bitch! I am freaking tired!

"Hello?" She said rudely, not opening her eyes.

"Hey, Meredith. It's Izzie. George and I were wondering if we could come over. Start moving in." She said happily. Meredith could hear her chewing something.

"Now?" She said in shock.

"Well, yeah." Izzie responded.

"Fine. Whatever. Don't you sleep?" Meredith whined.

"Of course. Okay, well, we're on our way."

"Okay." Meredith said. She flipped her phone shut and covered her head with her pillow. She laid there for forty-five minutes. She was tired, Chase kept her up all night, but if you ask him, it was her. She heard a knock at the front door. She knew it was her new roommates, she went to climb out if bed and realized she wasn't dressed. She grabbed the first thing she saw. She ran down the stairs in Chase's sleep pants and Stanford tee shirt.

"Hey guys." Meredith said as she opened the door.

"Oh, were you sleeping?" George asked.

"Yeah, I was. It's fine. But don't let it happen again." She joked. She started to follow them out to get some boxes.

"We've got it."

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah. You go take a shower, or get dressed. Or whatever you want to do." Izzie said politely, as she carried in a box.

"If you're sure..." Meredith said. They nodded. She ran upstairs and climbed in the shower.

Meredith was shocked when she came downstairs and there were tons of boxes everywhere. She was hoping all of their stuff was going to fit in their rooms. They were roommates. They each got a room. She had the house the way she wanted. Even if it was a t.v. on a table and a sofa. The rest was still packed up. The pod that contained her belongings from England was going to be delivered some time this week. Meredith went right in and started carrying boxes to their rooms. They both had their names and the contents written on the boxes. They were much more organized than she was.

By the end of the day, Izzie and George had their rooms completely set up. Izzie offered to cook dinner. Meredith was supposed to go out with Chase, buts she called and he was still working. He said he would come over after work. She was praying that he could, without being caught. They had both agreed that he had to park down the street. Meredith sat down at the table, where Izzie had a whole meal prepared. She was impressed.

"So, thanks for everything." Said George.

"No problem. Thanks, Iz, for the food. It's great. I don't cook." Meredith said, sticking a bite of breaded chicken into her mouth. "So, we could ride together to work tomorrow. It would save on gas."

"That would be great." Said Izzie. "Are you planning on unpacking? I could help you." She said, hoping Meredith would agree.

"No, not yet. I have more stuff coming. I can do. I will soon, I promise." Meredith said, making excuses.

"Okay." Izzie said

The interns all sat around, watching t.v. The whole time, Meredith was worried about Chase. How the hell are we going to do this? It's crazy. Stupid! Around ten o'clock, Izzie said she was going to bed. One down, one to go. George followed about ten minutes after her. She immediately called Chase, who was just getting ready to leave the hospital. She sat on the sofa, watching out the window. After fifteen minutes, she saw him walk up. They quickly made their way up to her room. Meredith locked the door.

"This is really stupid." Meredith said.

"It will be fine." He said, hoping to reassure her. He started peeling his clothes off. He got into bed with his boxer briefs on. Meredith threw on a large t-shirt.

"I have to say, that t-shirt has never looked sexier!" He said, rolling over to kiss her.

"They are here, down the hall." She said quietly.

"They are not your parents. They know you have sex. They don't know it's me." He whispered, kissing her neck.

"We have to be quiet."

"We can do quiet." He said reassuring her. He pulls up her shirt, and begins kissing her neck. She moans and he pulls down her panties and enters her.

"Meredith..." He moaned.

----------------

"You guys look shitty." Cristina said, as George and Izzie walked up to their lockers.

"Yeah, moving in with Meredith...bad idea!" Said Izzie, rolling her eyes.

"Why?" Mocked Cristina.

"Banging headboard all night." George said quickly.

"Nice..." Said Alex, shutting his locker.

"One minute we were all talking about going to sleep. Next thing I know there was moaning and banging. I don't know where the guy came from. There was no one there." Izzie said, yawning.

"So Grey did all that herself?" Alex said with a suggestive look.

"I did not." Meredith said as she walked in.

"So who is the guy?" They all said.

"No one you know."

"Okay you lazy interns, get to work!" Bailey said. She spat out assignments and they all scurried off. Cristina and Meredith ran down to the pit.

"So who is it?" Cristina said.

"No one!"

"Come on, I'm your person." Cristina said, and she opened the door.

"My person?" Meredith asked as she walked through.

"I could be."

"Only because you want gossip." Meredith retorted.

"I am not a gossip. But whatever or who ever this is, it has to be good!" Cristina laughed.

"Believe me, it is." Meredith joked.

"That is so not fair." Cristina moaned.

----------------

Meredith got pulled into surgery with Derek Shepherd. He had a craniotomy, scheduled. Cristina was pissed because she was stuck in the pit all day. Meredith prepped the patient, and went into the scrub room.

"Good day, Dr. Grey." Derek stated, looking over at her.

"Yes, it is Dr. Shepherd." Meredith said scrubbing her fingernails with the brush.

"So, will this be your first, craniotomy?" He asked.

"Yes." She answered, with a smile.

"So, you are going to lose your virginity with me?" He said, raising his eyebrows.

"I guess, in a sense." She chuckled.

"I'm glad. I'm good, you know." He laughed.

"I hope you are still talking about brain surgery here." They both chuckle, as they walk into the OR.

"It's a beautiful day to save lives, let's have some fun." Derek said, looking around at his surgical team, his eyes resting on Meredith. He spent a lot of time asking her questions, all of which she got right. He was impressed. She knew what she was doing.

"So, have you talked to your mother yet?" He whispered.

"No. I did not." She answered. "So, you and Addison, huh?"

"What?" He said, looking up at her.

"Look, you said it. We talked twice, in a bar. Now it will be twice in a bar and twice in the hospital." She laughed.

"Yes, I believe that constitutes us as friends." He said, smiling.

"Really?" Meredith said, raising her eyebrows.

"I think so. So, yes, Addison and I. Yes. A long time ago." He said.

"So you are with Holly." She said in a squeaky voice, imitating Holly. She laughed.

"That wasn't very nice." He said, with a chuckle.

"So you and Addison, you weren't the same. You were both different. She wasn't your type. That's what she said..." Meredith explained.

"She was right..." Derek responded, catching Meredith's eyes.

"So now you are with Holly. She is the same as Addison, but worse. I love Addison, she's great. But--" Meredith paused. "Holly is like Addison to the extreme. She is so..."

"Thanks, for bashing my girlfriend..." He said, slightly perturbed.

"I didn't mean--" Meredith started to say.

"Focus on the surgery, Grey." Derek said.

Shit. Now I've pissed him off. Whatever. If he doesn't want to hear the truth, screw him. I am not talking to him. Why do you even care if he cares. He is your boss. He is nothing. This is business. Who cares if he wants to be with that airhead, Holly. Why are you calling her that? God.

Derek didn't talk to Meredith during the surgery. Derek closed up the patient and headed to the scrub room. Meredith went in a few minutes later. She didn't look or talk to him.

"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't--" Derek started to say. His voice was much softer.

"This is business. You are my boss. That was unprofessional, and it won't happen again, because this is business, and we will only talk about business." She grabbed a paper towel and walked out.

"Meredith--" Derek said, as she walked out. He let out a sigh, and ran his fingers through his hair.

Meredith went right down to the cafeteria. She got in line and grabbed a sandwich and water. She scanned the tables and saw Cristina sitting in the corner. She liked Cristina. Cristina was like her. Izzie and George are just so happy all of the time. She walked over the the table, and plopped herself down on the seat.

"So you got to scrub in on a craniotomy with McDreamy?" Cristina said, looking up at Meredith.

"McDreamy?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah, Shepherd. He's all McDreamy, he has great hair, and stars in his eyes." Cristina explained.

"More like McAss!" Meredith spat, taking a large bite of her sandwich.

"Having a lovers quarrel?" Cristina chuckled.

"We are not lovers. What are you talking about? He is an arrogant ass." Meredith raised her voice, as she glared at Cristina.

"Oh, come on. Everyone knows it is him." Cristina stated confidently.

"It's not him. It's someone else." Meredith said smoothly, taking a drink of her water. "I have no interest in Derek Shepherd."

"He has plenty of interest in you." Cristina said.

"No he doesn't. He has Holly. He is happy with Holly." Meredith said, hating saying Holly's name.

"He may have her, but he wants you." Cristina said, like she was stating the obvious. Izzie, George and Alex walk up.

"Seriously. Who is it?" Izzie said to Meredith.

"A guy." Meredith said quickly. "I can't say. I don't want to say!"

"It's Shepherd." Alex said, food falling out of his mouth.

"It's not. I asked. It really isn't him." Cristina said convincingly.

"Really?" Izzie asked. Cristina nodded her head. "Hmm."

"Does he work here?" Asked George.

"Not saying." Meredith said.

"You are no fun!" Izzie responded.

"I have to get back to work." Meredith said, as she got and walked away.

"I wonder who it is..." Izzie said, fading off.

"Whoever it is, it's good." Alex responded.

"Yeah."

----------------

Meredith avoided Derek all day. She had this yearning to be around him. She wasn't sure why, but she felt drawn to him. He was an ass. She was wrong to ask personal questions, especially at work. But he is still an ass. The day was over, and she was heading back to the locker room. She glanced over and saw her mom in her room. Ellis caught Meredith's eye. Meredith was angry. She went to the locker room and changed her clothes. She sat on the bench, not talking to anyone. She finally got up and stormed out. She found herself in Ellis' room.

"It is your fault!" She shouted.

"What is my fault?" Ellis snapped at her daughter.

"It is your fault that I grew up without a father! If I had a dad, everything would have been different. I would have been okay!" She yelled, not caring who heard.

"Meredith. I had an affair. It was a mistake. I love Richard. I am not sorry about it. I do not regret one bit of it!" Ellis raised her voice, and glared at her daughter.

"You should have tried harder with dad. You screwed up. You made him leave. You made him alienate me!" Meredith continued to yell, her eyes welling up.

"Meredith come here." Meredith walks over to Ellis' bed. "I am sorry. I did the best I could. I know it wasn't good enough, but I did try." Ellis said sympathetically. "Did you ever-- Never mind." Ellis began to say, and stopped.

"What? Just say it!" Meredith cried out.

"Did you ever wonder why he didn't come back. I did tell him to go. I did tell him to never come back. But he had rights. He had moral right. Legal rights. He could have come back, he chose not to. He walked away. I love you more than anything, Meredith. I'm sorry. I wish I could change it. But, I am here for you now." Ellis said kindly, grabbing Meredith's hand.

"I guess in my heart I always knew." Meredith shrugged. She turned to walk out.

"Meredith?" Ellis said quietly. "Please come by tomorrow."

"I'll try." Meredith answered, walking out. She didn't know if she would try. She didn't know what to think.

Meredith slowly walked to the elevator. She didn't feel better, she didn't feel worse. She didn't feel anything but numb. She needed work things out with her mom, but they would never get along. And her dad. He wasn't there when she needed him. Her mom was right, he could have found her. She was in their childhood home until she was eighteen. He just walked away. Just like all the men in her life. She was happy to see an empty elevator. She sighed as she laid her head back. An arm flew in the door and they opened. She closed her eyes.

"Hey." Chase said.

"Hey." Meredith responded with no emotion.

"So, I thought you come to my apartment tonight. I can cook for you..." Chase said happily.

"Yeah, okay. What time are you leaving here?" Meredith asked.

"In an hour." He said.

"Well, I'm heading over to Joe's. I'll come over after. I need a drink." She said as she moaned.

"Okay. But do you really need to drink? Maybe you should cut back." He said, in a caring voice.

"I know what I need." Meredith said simply and walked out.

-----------------

She made her way up to the bar, sitting in her favorite stool.

"A shot of tequila. Just one. Don't give me more, even if I beg!" Meredith said to Joe.

"Coming right up..." Joe said. He sat the shot in front of her. She sat there and stared at it. She was not feeling anything, and it was scaring her.

"Meredith..." She heard. She knew who it was. She wasn't going to acknowledge him. "Oh, so now you are ignoring me. Okay." He took a drink of his scotch, and sat there for a few minutes. "Not okay! Look at me. Meredith. Okay. I was an ass. An arrogant ass. That's what you're calling me, right? I'm sorry. One minute, I'm saying we're friends, then I am an ass. I was wrong." He said quietly, looking at her unchanged expression. "Are you okay?"

"No." She said quickly, staring at her shot.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"I don't have a dad." She said, letting it really sink in for the first time.

"Neither do I." He answered sadly.

"You don't?" She asked.

"No. It's not okay. I'm here, to talk, if you need me." He said softly.

"Thanks." She turned and smiled at him. He put his hand on her shoulder. "I talked to my mom."

"Is that good or bad?" He asked.

"I don't know. It feels the same. It's like all of my emotions have been sucked away. I feel nothing." She stated in a sad realization.

"You just need the right person to bring them back." He said with a McDreamy smile. Neither knew they were being watched.

--------------

"So, you didn't drink." Chase said happily.

"No, I guess I didn't." Meredith said smoothly. Knowing it wasn't Chase, even though he thought it was, who made her stay sober. "Dinner was good. I didn't know you could cook."

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me." He said with a smile. "Do you want to go to bed? You look tired."

"No sex?" She asked with a funny face. She was really surprised.

"No. Our relationship isn't just about sex." He stated as he dried the last dish.

"Sure. Bed is good." She grabbed his hand and the walked in the bedroom. She threw on one of his shirts. The both laid down, he wrapped his arms around her. She closed her eyes.

"Meredith, I love you." Chase said softly. Meredith went rigid. She panicked. She didn't respond. He knew she was awake. He sighed at her lack of response, not knowing what to do. He finally closed his eyes.

Crap. Did he really just say that? I love you? He loves me? I didn't say anything. Do I love him? I don't know. I don't know anything. Crap. Now what?

--------------------

I Know you guys hate Chase. He will leave. Do not worry! Mer is getting closer to Derek, but they aren't even close to having a relationship yet. More surprises to come!