I don't own Grey's Anatomy. If I did, Jillian would be calling me wanted to know if I am ever going to let her husband come home. Alas, no calls, no Patrick. I guess I don't own it.

Meredith didn't talk on the way home. She continued to stare out the window. They passed a car with a family in in. They looked happy. She was jealous. Why did they get to be happy? Why couldn't it be her. She had never realized how she had affected the people in her life. Everyone she had ever been around either hurt her or she hurt them. It was all connected. The common thread? The common denominator? Her.

Chase and Meredith both went to her house. Izzie was staying over at Alex's apartment and George was on-call. It was one of the rare times that they were able to roam freely around the house. Meredith unlocked the door and immediately went upstairs to her bathroom. Chase softly closed the front door and made his way upstairs. He was worried about her. He wasn't sure what had happened. He did know that whatever happened, happened when she talked to Jake. He had no idea what he said to her. He walked in her room and saw that the bathroom door was closed. He heard the running water. He walked up and knocked on the door. No answer. He wiggled the handle. It was locked. He started to worry.

"Mer. Meredith. Are you okay?" He said softly. There was no answer. "Meredith!" He shouted.

"I'm okay." She said softly. "I'll be out in awhile."

"Okay." He answered. "I'm going to go take a shower and get this chlorine off of me." He told her.

"All right." She answered. She laid back against the bathtub. She heard her bedroom door shut and she let it all go. She cried hard. She cried until her tears would no longer come out. Why can't everything just be simple. Why can't I just tell Chase I love him. She laid in the bathtub for an hour. The water had long since cooled off. She couldn't pull herself out. She didn't have the will to do it. Finally she crawled out. She really had to try to do it. She wrapped a towel around herself and walked into her room. Chase was sitting on the bed, his back leaned against the headboard. Her eyes met his. He was worried, she could tell. She dropped her towel and began putting her flannel pajamas on. Generally, this would turn Chase on. Not tonight. Tonight was painful, tonight was detrimental. She didn't say anything. She laid down on the bed facing the wall.

"Meredith. If you tell me what's wrong, maybe I can help." He said sympathetically. She didn't say anything. He sat there for a few minutes, and then switched the light off. He couldn't just sit here, and let her stay in pain. He pulled her up close. She let him. She felt like a rag doll. He laid her head on his chest. "You can say what you are thinking. I won't judge you. You can't keep it inside. It will just eat away at you." He said softly. She didn't answer. "I know that your life hasn't been perfect. I know that you have made mistakes. But you are a good person. You are a great person. You have a big heart and you are special. You can't tear yourself apart over something that has already happened. You can't change it. All you can do is move on, live in the moment. You have to cherish what you have. I cherish you, Meredith. You are the most important thing to me. So please, don't do this to yourself." He said sadly.

"Just stay with me." She said softly.

"I will." He replied.

Meredith laid there for a long time. Her head moving with his breathing as his chest rose and fell. He was there. He was right about what he said. She had to live in the moment. She had to cherish what she had. She had to make it right. She had to stop feeling sorry for herself. He loved her. That should be enough. It had to work. She didn't have anyone else. She had to pick herself up and try again.

"Chase?" She said as softly as she could. She wasn't sure if she was going to regret what she was about to say. "I love you." He didn't say anything, he pulled her close and kissed her head. He had been waiting so long for her to say it. He sighed a relieved breath.

"I love you too." She said with a smile on his face. Meredith fell asleep on his chest, knowing that tomorrow would be a better day.

------------------

"So you actually said it?" Cristina said loudly. "You said 'I Love You'."

"Yeah, I did." Meredith said, laying back on the locker room bench.

"Did you mean it?" Cristina asked.

"Yeah. I did. I really think I love him. What's not to love. He is kind, and smart, and caring. He is a great guy." Meredith said with a smile. Izzie walked in.

"What's going on?" Izzie chirped happily.

"Meredith told her guy that she loves him." Cristina said quickly. Meredith smacks her in the arm.

"Cristina!"

"That's great, Mer. I'm really happy for you." Izzie said with a smile.

"You got laid." Meredith said with a smile.

"Yeah, I did." Izzie said, sitting her tray down on the table.

"So, what was it? What was the rating?" Meredith asked with a laugh.

"I don't do that..." Izzie replied, rolling her eyes.

"You are no fun!" Cristina and Meredith both said. Bailey walked in.

"Okay, let's see... Cristina, you are with Dr. Burke, Grey you are with Montgomery, and Stevens you are with Shepherd. Go, work, have fun." She said happily.

"Well, Iz, it looks like you weren't the only one that got laid." Meredith said, they all laughed.

--------------

"Dr. Grey, how lucky am I to have you today?" Addison said with a laugh. "We have Evelyn here, she is pregnant with twins." Addison said. "So, we are waiting."

"Waiting?" Meredith said.

"Waiting. She is dilated to 5 centimeters." Addison responded.

"Why aren't we doing a cesarian?" Meredith asked.

"Evelyn wants a natural birth, and as long as it's safe, that's what she will get." Addison said quickly. They both walk into the hall. "You look happy."

"I am. I said it. I told him I loved him." Meredith said happily.

"Oh." Said Addison unhappily. She was hoping that Meredith and Derek would have a chance now that Holly was out of the picture.

"What?" Meredith asked, sensing Addison's disappointment.

"Nothing. That's great, Meredith." Addison said with a fake smile. "So, when are you going to tell me the rest of this story?"

-----------------

"Derek! Please!" Begged Holly, as Derek walked down the stairs and away from her.

"No. We are done, Holly." He said coldly. "You lied."

"People lie all of the time. It wasn't a big deal. No one got hurt!" She said, building her crappy defense.

"Meredith could have gotten hurt." He said simply, while marching down the stairwell.

"Who cares!" Holly laughed. Now she was mad, who gave a crap what happened to Meredith.

"I care!" Derek said as he turned and glared at her.

"You and Meredith. Never going to happen. She doesn't want you. She thinks you are a joke. A boy. A toy. She is just playing with your mind, Derek." Holly mocked, as she turned and walked away. "You are a fool!" Izzie comes walking up.

"I'm with you today, Dr. Shepherd." Izzie said.

"Good, we have a crainiatomy on the board." Derek said with a smile. "Why don't you go run the tests?" She shook her yes.

-----------------

"Addison!" Holly yelled as she closed in on her from behind. "Addison!" Addison turns around slowly.

"Yes, Holly?" Addison asked with a little bit of sarcasm in her voice. Now that she wasn't with Derek, she didn't have to pretend that she liked her.

"Oh, Addison. You have to talk to him." She said, tearing up. "I don't want to lose him..."

"I think you already have." Addison said matter-of-factly, looking over her glasses.

"What? No! We can fix it. I need your help..." Holly said quickly. Addison starts to walk down the hallway.

"No." Addison said boldly.

"No?" Holly repeated. "What do you mean, no?" Holly said with confusion in her voice.

"No. Listen, you and I, we aren't the same." Addison stated to a confused Holly. "Now that you and Derek aren't together, I am not obligated to be your friend."

"Seriously?" Holly said in shock, putting her hands on her hips.

"And, I really don't think you are the girl for Derek anyhow." Addison stated coldly, while reading a patient file. "I should know, I am his ex-wife!"

"Oh and who is?" Holly yelled. "Meredith Grey, right!"

"Actually, yes." Addison quickly.

"I am not letting that slut take my boyfriend!" She shouted loudly, catching everyone's attention.

"Holly, keep it down. You are being---" Addison started.

"Go to Hell." Holly yelled as she turned on her heel and walked away.

"What's wrong with her?" Meredith asked as she walked up.

"She is on a war path." Addison said quietly. "Can you run these tests to the lab for me?" Addison asked.

"Of course." Meredith answered. She quickly walked down the hallway and to the elevator. There stood Derek Shepherd as the door opened. She slid in right before they closed. "Hey." She said with a smile, and then started to giggle.

"What?" He said with a McDreamy smile.

"Oh nothing." She laughed. "Okay. I think I should probably be in fear for my life." She started laughing even harder.

"Why is that?" He asked, closing the space between them. He looked into her eyes. He wanted to kiss her. He envisioned pushing her against the wall and shoving his tongue into her mouth. Her eyes were sparkling. She looked perfect.

"Oh, your girlfriend is after me..." She trailed off. "And I am scared as hell." She said, laughing once again.

"Ex. She is my ex girlfriend!" He said quickly.

"Oh, sorry. Ex." Meredith said. "Apparently she thinks it is my fault. She thinks you are after me." Meredith giggled. "Oh, and I want you too. How crazy is that?" She asked.

"Not crazy at all." He said, staring deeply into her eyes.

"What?" Meredith said with a serious look on her face. It scared her. Derek took notice. He knew she wasn't ready yet.

"I'm kidding!" He laughed. He looked at her face soften.

"Really?" Meredith laughed.

"Yeah. You and I... How funny would that be?" He asked. He was sad, he had to lie.

"That would be hilarious." She said, walking out as the doors opened.

"I lied." He muttered when she was out of earshot. He dropped his head, not even noticing that he had missed his floor.

----------------

"Hey, Iz." Meredith said. Izzie was leaned up against the wall waiting for lab results.

"Hey." She responded.

"I need these ASAP." Meredith said, as she handed the tech the specimen.

"Yeah, yeah. Everyone does." He said, looking at her.

"Please?" She said with a smile.

"Oh, okay. But only for you!" He flirted back.

"Why do you do that?" Izzie asked.

"What?" Meredith said, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Flirt." Izzie said with a laugh.

"I am not flirtatious!" Meredith defended as she peeled open her candy bar.

"No...not you!" Izzie laughed.

"So, Holly is after me." Meredith said with a laugh.

"Oh, I'd be scared if I were you." Izzie laughed. "You messed with the wrong girl's boyfriend.

"I didn't do anything to Derek." Meredith said quickly.

"Oh, but he wants to do things to you!" Izzie said with a laugh.

"No he does not." Meredith said quickly, shoving candy bar into her mouth. "I just saw him in the elevator. We are friends at the most."

"Sure..." Izzie responded. "Are you going to Joe's tonight?"

"I think I might grab a quick beer." Meredith told her. She walked over and threw her wrapper away.

"Me too. We can go together." Izzie offered.

"Sounds good!"

"Dr. Grey, here are you results." Adam, the lab tech said.

"Thanks, Adam." She said with a smile and walked away. "Bye, Iz."

"What the hell? I was here first..." Izzie yelled.

"Yes, you were." He returned and walked away.

----------------

Meredith, Cristina and Izzie walked over to Joe's in the rain. They were all talking about their surgeries of the day. Meredith opened the door. The familiar bell dinged loudly. It was busy. Meredith looked around, she saw Chase in the corner. She flashed him a secret smile and marched up to the bar with her friends.

"I'll have a beer, Joe." Meredith said.

"No tequila?" He offered with a smile.

"Not tonight. Just a beer, thanks." She said, he handed her a beer. She took a drink. Izzie and Cristina were over at a table. She glanced over at Chase, once again. He was undressing her with his eyes. She walked over to the table and sat down. She looked over at George, who was playing darts with Callie Torres.

"He looks like he is having a good time!" Meredith said.

"Yeah he does." Izzie agreed. "Oh look, there is the Chief." Izzie pointed. "I heard that he is dating a skinny blonde."

"Oh really?" Cristina said, glancing over at Meredith. Meredith looked away.

"Yep. I guess someone saw him out to dinner with her, or something." Izzie pondered. "I wonder who it is?"

"It could be anyone..." Meredith offered. They all made small talk. Meredith was on her sixth beer, and feeling pretty good. "Hey, does anyone want to play darts?"

"I will." Said Cristina. "But you know I will kick your ass!"

"Yeah, I don't think so." She laughed. "Derek taught me well!"

The both make their way to the dart board. Meredith was doing pretty badly. She did managed to hit the board a few times. Cristina just laughed. Meredith was getting ready to throw another dart, when she felt someone behind her. She could smell the liquor on their breath. She could feel the hot steam on her neck.

"Maybe you need my boyfriend." Holly offered loudly. "He really seemed to help you out! In more way than one." Meredith turned around quickly.

"What did you say?" Meredith said quickly and nastily.

"You heard me, bitch. You stole my boyfriend." She yelled. "Whore!"

"I think you better shut you mouth." Cristina yelled.

"I can handle this." Meredith offered to Cristina. She turned back to Holly. "You need to shut your mouth before I shut it for you!" Meredith shouted. Now everyone's attention was on them.

"Excuse me?" Holly yelled. "Is that a threat?"

"Take it how you want." Meredith shrugged.

"I will kill you, Meredith." Holly laughed. Holly was bigger, not by a lot. She was just a little bigger than Izzie. "I will snap you like a twig..."

"Oh really?" Meredith said, laughing. "You aren't worth the time." Meredith offered, as she turned around to throw her dart. She put her arm back. She felt Holly grab a handful of her hair. She ripped Meredith backwards. Meredith went off balance and fell backward.

"Oh, that was the wrong fucking move!" Meredith said, jumping up. Holly immediately attacked, grabbing Meredith's hair and pulling. "Let go of my hair, you crazy bitch!"

"You are so dead. I told you not to screw my boyfriend!" Holly yelled.

"I didn't. But I could swear I heard somewhere that he dumped your stupid ass!" Meredith yelled. Holly started pulling Meredith around by her hair. Everyone was now yelling and gathering around. Two of Holly's friends came up to help her, but her cut off by Izzie and Cristina. Holly wouldn't let go of Meredith's hair. Meredith punched her in the stomach, she immediately let go. Meredith took a step back.

"Oh..." Holly yelled at Meredith. "Bad move." She ran up and smacked Meredith in the face. Meredith shoved her as hard as she could, sending her flying. She fell on her ass and climbed up. She ran at Meredith as scratched her face. Meredith pulled back and punched Holly hard in the lip. Blood went everywhere. Meredith felt someone pull her back. She elbowed the person. Holly touched her lip and saw the blood. This infuriated her and lunged at Meredith once again. This time Meredith punched her right in the eye, sending her to the ground. Holly immediately started bawling. Meredith just stood there. Everyone looked at her in shock. They were surprised she had so much power in her. Meredith walked up to the bar and asked for a beer. Everyone started cheering. Holly's friends walked her out. She was going to need stitches.

"Holy crap, Mer!" Cristina said, slapping her on the back. "I never thought you had it in you."

"You would have fit in well in my trailer park." Laughed Izzie. People crowded around, slapping her on the back. Meredith had given Holly many chances to back down, but she had kept on. Meredith looked over to see Derek standing there.

"What the hell was that?" Derek said with confusion. He had come in when the fight was halfway through.

"Holly attacked Mer. Mer totally kicked her ass!" Izzie pipped up.

"Yeah, mine too. You elbowed me!" He shot at Meredith.

"Sorry about that." She said, sympathetically. Joe walked up.

"I can't promote violence in my bar...But, way to go, Champ!" Joe said, everyone cheered. Meredith saw a shocked Chase standing outside the crowd. He gave her a nod that he was leaving. She chugged another beer and slammed the bottle on the bar.

"I have to go..." She said, walking out.

"Do you want me to call you a cab?" Joe asked.

"No, I have a ride." She said simply and walked out. Everyone started yelling and talking about what had happened. She was now The Emerald City Bar's latest celebrity. She made her way out, and discreetly climbed into Chase's car.

"Wow, Mer." He said in shock.

"Yeah." She returned. "Let's get the hell out of here."

"That was...hot!" He said with a chuckle. "My place or yours?"

"Yours." She answered. They drove to his apartment. He couldn't wait to get his champion home...

---------------

For some reason, I haven't been able to upload in days...So here it is...Finally.

had to have Meredith beat Holly up. I don't promote violence. Na, I really do. I can't lie! Especially against her. So Meredith feels guilty. Everything bad keeps happening. And Nate, he hurt her, you will find out more about him later. He broke her. She didn't want to love anyone again, and now she has fallen for Chase. So Meredith told Chase she loved him. And yes, she does love him. What's not to love? Ducks from the flying rocks and sticks being thrown Do not fear, something is going to happen... As for Mer/Der sex, it will be coming. I didn't know if you guys liked it when I put the sex scenes in. Some people do not. I do think we need them. For God's sake, on the show, when they consider Der rolling over on Mer giving us sex...that is pathetic!